Episode Transcript: Spy Buddies

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Episode Article: [[Spy Buddies (Episode)|Spy Buddies]]
  
 
==Characters==
 
==Characters==
Line 19: Line 21:
  
 
==Dialogue==
 
==Dialogue==
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(a shadow that looks like Plankton walks up to the Krusty Krab and gets inside using the code. He goes back into the office and opens up the safe and gets out the formula. SpongeBob turns on the lights to reveal the shadow is Mr. Krabs)
  
(A shadow that looks like Plankton walks up to the Krusty Krab and gets inside using the code. He goes back into the office and opens up the safe and gets out the formula. SpongeBob turns on the lights to reveal the shadow is Mr. Krabs)
+
'''SpongeBob''': What are you doing, Mr. Krabs?
 
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SpongeBob: What are you doing, Mr. Krabs?
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Mr. Krabs: Just making sure the Krabby Patty formula is safe. Plankton hasn't tried to steal the formula in over a month. He must be planning something big.
+
 
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Squidward: (walks in) Hello.
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Mr. Krabs: One of you will have to volunteer for some extra work.
+
  
Squidward: (walks out) Good-bye.
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'''Mr. Krabs''': Just making sure the Krabby Patty formula is safe. Plankton hasn't tried to steal the formula in over a month. He must be planning something big.
  
Mr. Krabs: I was just gonna ask if someone can spy on Plankton.
+
'''Squidward''': (walks in) Hello.
  
SpongeBob: Spy?! Ooh! (acts like James Bond)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': One of you will have to volunteer for some extra work.
  
Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob, I can see you through this straw.
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'''Squidward''': (walks out) Good-bye.
  
SpongeBob: Patrick, I'm gonna be a spy.
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'''Mr. Krabs''': I was just gonna ask if someone can spy on Plankton.
  
Patrick: You're a spy?! I wanna be a spy, too!
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'''SpongeBob''': Spy?! Ooh! (acts like James Bond)
  
Mr. Krabs: Shh! Okay, okay! You can be a spy. Just be quiet.
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'''Patrick''': Hey, SpongeBob, I can see you through this straw.
  
SpongeBob & Patrick: Hooray, we're spy buddies! (Mr. Krabs stammers. SpongeBob & Patrick whisper) Spy buddies.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Patrick, I'm gonna be a spy.
  
Mr. Krabs: Your instructions are on this Krabby Patty. But remember, the fate of the Krusty Krab rests in your hands, SpongeBob.
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'''Patrick''': You're a spy?! I wanna be a spy, too!
  
SpongeBob: In my hands... ooh!
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'''Mr. Krabs''': Shh! Okay, okay! You can be a spy. Just be quiet.
  
Patrick: (examines SpongeBob’s hand) Ooh. (cut to SpongeBob’s house later that night where SpongeBob pushes the button on the patty)
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'''SpongeBob and Patrick''': Hooray, we're spy buddies! (Mr. Krabs stammers. SpongeBob & Patrick whisper) Spy buddies.
  
Mr. Krabs: You're mission-- if you choose to accept it-- is to discover what Plankton's up to. Don't let him out of your sight. You'll need to rustle up some spy gadgets. If you don't accept it, you're fired! This patty will self-destruct in ten seconds. (both scream and run around while the patty is beeping)
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'''Mr. Krabs''': Your instructions are on this Krabby Patty. But remember, the fate of the Krusty Krab rests in your hands, SpongeBob.
  
SpongeBob: Get rid of it! Get rid of it, Patrick! (Patrick puts the patty in his pants. It explodes and leaves the bottom half of his body without any skin)
+
'''SpongeBob''': In my hands... ooh!
  
Patrick: That's gonna leave a mark. (cut to Sandy's treedome)
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'''Patrick''': (examines SpongeBob’s hand) Ooh. (cut to SpongeBob’s house later that night where SpongeBob pushes the button on the patty)
  
SpongeBob: Hey, Sandy.
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'''Mr. Krabs''': Your mission --if you choose to accept it-- is to discover what Plankton's up to. Don't let him out of your sight. And you'll need to rustle up some spy gadgets. If you don't accept it, you're fired! This patty will self-destruct in ten seconds. (both scream and run around while the patty is beeping)
  
Sandy: Hey, SpongeBob, Patrick. What y'all doing?
+
'''SpongeBob''': Get rid of it! Get rid of it, Patrick! (Patrick puts the patty in his pants. It explodes and leaves the bottom half of his body without any skin)
  
SpongeBob: Do you know anything about spying, Sandy?
+
'''Patrick''': That's gonna leave a mark. (bubble-wipe to Sandy's Treedome)
  
Sandy: Well, I know you need a lot of crazy gadgets like jet-packs and laser-equipped Bermuda shorts with walkie-talkies.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Hey, Sandy.
  
Walkie-talkie: 10-4, good buddy. (static)
+
'''Sandy''': Hey, SpongeBob, Patrick. What y'all doing?
  
Sandy: Cameras that fit up your nose, high-powered magnifying glass, and my favorite, the knockout ray. (blasts SpongeBob and Patrick with it causes them to knockout. Then blasts them again making them wake up)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Do you know anything about spying, Sandy?
  
SpongeBob: Wow, Sandy, with these gadgets, Patrick and I will be great spies.
+
'''Sandy''': Well, I know you need a lot of crazy gadgets like jet-packs and laser-equipped Bermuda shorts with walkie-talkies.
  
Sandy: (laughs) I wouldn't trust you two with any of this stuff.
+
'''Walkie-talkie''': 10-4, good buddy. (static)
  
SpongeBob: What do we do now, Patrick? (Patrick picks up the knockout ray and knocks Sandy out. Both laugh. Cut to the city where SpongeBob and Patrick are spying from the side of a building)
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'''Sandy''': Cameras that fit up your nose, high-powered magnifying glass, and my favorite, the knockout ray. (blasts SpongeBob and Patrick with it causes them to knockout. Then blasts them again making them wake up)
  
Patrick: What's he doing now?
+
'''SpongeBob''': Wow, Sandy, with these gadgets, Patrick and I will be great spies.
  
SpongeBob: Nothing yet. Wait! Wait! He's... (Plankton walks into "Guppies R Us") ...buying baby clothes? We gotta get closer.
+
'''Sandy''': (laughs) I wouldn't trust you two with any of this stuff.
  
Plankton: Excuse me? (holds up a small pink outfit) Do you have anything in a size negative five?
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'''SpongeBob''': What do we do now, Patrick? (Patrick picks up the knockout ray and knocks Sandy out. Both laugh. Bubble-wipe to the city where SpongeBob and Patrick are spying from the side of a building)
  
Employee: (laughs) Uh, sorry, bud, that's as small as they come. (takes the outfit. SpongeBob enlarges himself in the clothes on the wall)
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'''Patrick''': What's he doing now?
  
SpongeBob: Wow, Plankton has to buy baby clothes? (Patrick enlarges himself in the outfit next to SpongeBob)
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'''SpongeBob''': Nothing yet. Wait! Wait! He's... (Plankton walks into "Guppies R Us") ...buying baby clothes? We gotta get closer.
  
Patrick: How embarrassing. (Plankton walks out of "Guppies R Us". SpongeBob walks out a couple seconds later)
+
'''Plankton''': Excuse me? (holds up a small pink outfit) Do you have anything in a size negative five?
  
SpongeBob: SpongeBob to Krabs. Come in Krabs.
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'''Employee''': (laughs) Uh, sorry, bud, that's as small as they come. (takes the outfit. SpongeBob enlarges himself in the clothes on the wall)
  
Mr. Krabs: Krabs here. Go ahead.
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'''SpongeBob''': Wow, Plankton has to buy baby clothes? (Patrick enlarges himself in the outfit next to SpongeBob)
  
SpongeBob: Plankton just bought some baby clothes.
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'''Patrick''': How embarrassing. (Plankton walks out of "Guppies R Us". SpongeBob walks out a couple seconds later)
  
Mr. Krabs: Baby clothes? Hmm... (writes 'baby clothes' on the chalkboard) What's he doing now?
+
'''SpongeBob''': SpongeBob to Krabs. Come in Krabs.
  
SpongeBob: Hold on. (looks through store window) He's buying...
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'''Mr. Krabs''': Krabs here. Go ahead.
  
Mr. Krabs: Yeah? Yeah?
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'''SpongeBob''': Plankton just bought some baby clothes.
  
SpongeBob: A... stamp.
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'''Mr. Krabs''': (writes 'baby clothes' on a nearby chalkboard) Baby clothes? Hmm... What's he doing now?
  
Mr. Krabs: A stamp. (writes it on the chalkboard) This is the most elaborate scheme ever. Keep on him, SpongeBob. (cut to later where SpongeBob and Patrick are tip-toeing behind Plankton)
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'''SpongeBob''': Hold on. (looks through store window) He's buying...
  
SpongeBob: We're right behind him and he has no idea. (from Plankton's POV, the tip-toes are thunderous steps. He turns around)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Yeah? Yeah?
  
Plankton: Would you stop making all that racket? (from SpongeBob and Patrick's POV, Plankton is squeaking as he talks so they can't understand him)
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'''SpongeBob''': A... stamp.
  
Patrick: What's he doing now?
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'''Mr. Krabs''': A stamp. (writes it on the chalkboard) This is the most elaborate scheme ever. Keep on him, SpongeBob. (cut to later where SpongeBob and Patrick are tip-toeing behind Plankton)
  
SpongeBob: I can't tell. (they walk again but SpongeBob is shining a light on Plankton from the magnifying glass)
+
'''SpongeBob''': We're right behind him and he has no idea. (from Plankton's POV, the tip-toes are thunderous steps. He turns around)
  
Plankton: Phew! Gosh, it's hot. (catches on fire and runs away screaming)
+
'''Plankton''': Would you stop making all that racket? (from SpongeBob and Patrick's POV, Plankton is squeaking as he talks so they can't understand him)
  
SpongeBob: He's getting away! Quick, Patrick, use the jet-pack!
+
'''Patrick''': What's he doing now?
  
Patrick: Can do! (pushes a button and Patrick grabs SpongeBob as they fly toward Plankton. Plankton jumps into a soda drink and puts himself out)
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'''SpongeBob''': I can't tell. (they walk again but SpongeBob is shining a light on Plankton from the magnifying glass)
  
Plankton: Phew. Huh? (SpongeBob and Patrick are fly over Plankton, setting him and the cup on fire, while they fly through buildings. The jet-pack detaches itself from Patrick and they both skid on the sidewalk. When they stand up, their faces and bodies are deformed)
+
'''Plankton''': Phew! Gosh, it's hot. (catches on fire and runs away screaming)
  
SpongeBob: Boy, it was lucky the sidewalk broke out fall. But we lost Plankton!
+
'''SpongeBob''': He's getting away! Quick, Patrick, use the jet-pack!
  
Patrick: To the spy mobile! (both hop into the car)
+
'''Patrick''': Can do! (pushes a button and Patrick grabs SpongeBob as they fly toward Plankton. Plankton jumps into a soda drink and puts himself out)
  
SpongeBob: Hmmm... mines, oil slick, smoke screen, shield...
+
'''Plankton''': Phew. Huh? (SpongeBob and Patrick are fly over Plankton, setting him and the cup on fire, while they fly through buildings. The jet-pack detaches itself from Patrick and they both skid on the sidewalk. When they stand up, their faces and bodies are deformed)
  
Patrick: Self destruct!! (pushes button and the car explodes. Both laugh. Patrick's pants phone is ringing) There's a call coming through on my Pants-A-Phone.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Boy, it was lucky the sidewalk broke our fall. But we lost Plankton!
  
Mr. Krabs: Krabs to Agent SpongeBob. Come in SpongeBob.
+
'''Patrick''': To the spy mobile! (both hop into a car)
  
Patrick: It's for you.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Hmmm... mines, oil slick, smoke screen, shield...
  
SpongeBob: Agent SpongeBob here.
+
'''Patrick''': Self-destruct! (pushes button and the car explodes. Both laugh and shake off the dust. Patrick's pants phone is ringing) There's a call coming through on my Pants-A-Phone.
  
Mr. Krabs: You found out what Plankton's up to?
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': (from the Pants-A-Phone) Krabs to Agent SpongeBob. Come in SpongeBob.
  
SpongeBob: I'm afraid we lost him, Mr. Krabs.
+
'''Patrick''': It's for you.
  
Mr. Krabs: Well, find him, lad. I'm not paying you to goof off with Patrick.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Agent SpongeBob here.
  
SpongeBob: You're not paying me at all, Mr. Krabs.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': You found out what Plankton's up to?
  
Mr. Krabs: Exactly. So get to work. (hangs up)
+
'''SpongeBob''': I'm afraid we lost him, Mr. Krabs.
  
Recording: If you'd like to make a call, please deposit twenty-five cents. (SpongeBob gets out a quarter. Cut to the Chum Bucket at night. SpongeBob and Patrick are on the roof)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Well, find him, lad. I'm not paying you to goof off with Patrick.
  
SpongeBob: Ok, Patrick, we're in position. Now how do we get inside?
+
'''SpongeBob''': You're not paying me at all, Mr. Krabs.
  
Patrick: I think the front door's open.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Exactly. So get to work. (hangs up)
  
SpongeBob: Spies don't use the front door, Patrick. We've got to figure out a complicated way to get inside.
+
'''Recording''': If you'd like to make a call, please deposit twenty-five cents. (SpongeBob gets out a quarter. Bubble-wipe to the Chum Bucket at night. SpongeBob and Patrick are on the roof)
  
Patrick: This looks like a job for Patrick Star Laser Pants! Ooh!! (shoots a laser out of his behind and cuts out a square on the roof)
+
'''SpongeBob''': OK, Patrick, we're in position. Now how do we get inside?
  
SpongeBob: Good work, Patrick! Now it's my turn. (drops down inside, with the rope tied around him. He lowers himself but hits the floor) I thought you were holding the rope. (Patrick lands on top of him)
+
'''Patrick''': I think the front door's open.
  
Patrick: I am. You need to be quiet. We're on a secret mission!
+
'''SpongeBob''': Spies don't use the front door, Patrick. We've got to figure out a complicated way to get inside.
  
Plankton: (turns on the lights) Secret mission, eh? {SpongeBob and Patrick scream} Don't you think I know what you're up to? You want to eat at the Chum Bucket without your boss knowing. Karen, we've got a customer! (cut to SpongeBob and Patrick sitting at a table holding menus and Plankton standing on the table) I'll let you two look over the menu. (He jumps off and walks away)
+
'''Patrick''': This looks like a job for Patrick Star Laser Pants! (shoots a laser out of his behind and cuts out a square on the roof) Ooh!!
  
Patrick: SpongeBob, I have to go.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Good work, Patrick! Now it's my turn. (drops down inside, with the rope tied around him. Lowers himself but hits the floor) I thought you were holding the rope. (Patrick lands on top of him)
  
SpongeBob: Oh, can't you go later?
+
'''Patrick''': I am. You need to be quiet. We're on a secret mission!
  
Patrick: {Groans} My laser pants aren't working right. (shoots a laser at the salt shaker on the other table. Patrick sighs)
+
'''Plankton''': (turns on the lights) Secret mission, eh? {SpongeBob and Patrick scream} Don't you think I know what you're up to? You want to eat at the Chum Bucket without your boss knowing. Karen, we've got a customer! (cut to SpongeBob and Patrick sitting at a table holding menus and Plankton standing on the table) I'll let you two look over the menu. (He jumps off and walks away)
  
Plankton: Could I interest you in a raspberry ice tea?
+
'''Patrick''': SpongeBob, I have to go.
  
Patrick: Uh, no thanks.
+
'''SpongeBob''': Oh, can't you go later?
  
Plankton: Or perhaps a bran muffin?
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'''Patrick''': (groans) My laser pants aren't working right. (shoots a laser at the salt shaker on the other table. Patrick sighs)
  
Patrick: {groans again} SpongeBob, I have to go now!
+
'''Plankton''': Could I interest you in a raspberry ice tea?
  
Plankton: Prune Danish? (sees Patrick's behind wiggle. Patrick groans again) What the...? (pan out to the Chum Bucket building where Patrick's laser pants makes holes everywhere and destroys the Chum Bucket. Later, the floor opens up and a blimp emerges with Plankton controlling it from the inside and SpongeBob and Patrick lying on top. Patrick sits up while SpongeBob continues to lie down) Destroy my lab, will ya, Krabs? Well, if it's war you want, it's war you'll get! (flies his blimp over to the Krusty Krab. The inside of the Krusty Krab gets darker)
+
'''Patrick''': Uh, no thanks.
  
Mr. Krabs: Is it dark or have I put up with cataract surgery too long?
+
'''Plankton''': Or perhaps a bran muffin?
  
Squidward: No, Mr. Krabs, it's that time of the month.
+
'''Patrick''': (groans again) SpongeBob, I have to go now!
  
Mr. Krabs: (sees the blimp) Merciful Neptune. (red light flashes) Man your battle stations!
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'''Plankton''': Prune Danish? (sees Patrick's behind wiggle. Patrick groans again) What the...? (cut to outside the Chum Bucket where Patrick's laser pants makes holes everywhere and destroys the Chum Bucket. Later, the floor opens up and a blimp emerges with Plankton controlling it from the inside and SpongeBob and Patrick lying on top. Patrick sits up while SpongeBob continues to lie down) Destroy my lab, will ya, Krabs? Well, if it's war you want, it's war you'll get! (flies his blimp over to the Krusty Krab. The inside of the Krusty Krab gets darker)
  
Squidward: I'm on it! (runs into the bathroom and flushes a toilet)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Is it dark or have I put up with cataract surgery too long?
  
Mr. Krabs: (raises himself in the crow's nest) Bring it on, Plankton.
+
'''Squidward''': No, Mr. Krabs, it's that time of the month.
  
Plankton: Oh, I will. We'll see if you have a customer left after I pump up the volume. (loud 50's pop music plays. All the customers cover their ears)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': (sees the blimp) Merciful Neptune. (red light flashes) Man your battle stations!
  
Fish: Oh, brother, I hated the real version of this song. (customers leave)
+
'''Squidward''': I'm on it! (runs into the bathroom and flushes a toilet)
  
Mr. Krabs: He's driving me customers away! Alright, Plankton, you want my customers so badly? You can have 'em! (sucks them all up and launches them through a cannon at the blimp)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': (raises himself in the crow's nest) Bring it on, Plankton.
  
Plankton: Do your worst, Krabs!
+
'''Plankton''': Oh, I will. We'll see if you have a customer left after I pump up the volume. (loud 50's pop music plays. All the customers cover their ears)
  
Squidward: (hits the blimp) I hate my job.
+
'''Fis'''h: Oh, brother, I hated the real version of this song. (customers leave)
  
SpongeBob: (watching from the top of the blimp) It's up to you and me, buddy.
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'''Mr. Krabs''': He's driving me customers away! Alright, Plankton, you want my customers so badly? You can have 'em! (sucks them all up and launches them through a cannon at the blimp)
  
Patrick: Abandon ship! (jumps off the blimp and lands in the cannon. Patrick was shot out towards the blimp)
+
'''Plankton''': Do your worst, Krabs!
  
Plankton: Point-headed projectile on the port side! (Patrick makes a hole in the blimp, causing it to fly into the Krusty Krab and destroy it)
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'''Squidward''': (hits the blimp) I hate my job.
  
Mr. Krabs: No!
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'''SpongeBob''': (watching from the top of the blimp) It's up to you and me, buddy.
  
Plankton: (standing on the Krusty Krab sign with a piece of paper in his hand) I win! I always win!
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'''Patrick''': Abandon ship! (jumps off the blimp and lands in the cannon. Gets shot out towards the blimp)
  
SpongeBob: Not to rain on your parade or anything, but you always lose.
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'''Plankton''': Point-headed projectile on the port side! (Patrick makes a hole in the blimp, causing it to fly into the Krusty Krab)
  
Plankton: No, SpongeBob, I always... (his head turns into Mr. Krabs)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': No! (the blimp hits the Krusty Krab and destroys it)
  
Mr. Krabs: ...win!
+
'''Plankton''': (standing on the Krusty Krab sign with a piece of paper in his hand) I win! I always win!
  
SpongeBob: (gasps) Mr. Krabs?
+
'''SpongeBob''': Not to rain on your parade or anything, but you always lose.
  
Mr. Krabs: That's right! I stole me own formular!
+
'''Plankton''': No, SpongeBob, I always... (removes his head to reveal that of Mr. Krabs)
  
SpongeBob: But if you're Mr. Krabs, then who's... (the other Mr. Krabs rips off his suit to show the Robot Krabs from "Imitation Krabs") Mr. Krabs is a robot!! (Robot Krabs opens its head up to reveal Plankton)
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': ...win!
  
Plankton: No, you idiot.
+
'''SpongeBob''': (gasps) Mr. Krabs?
  
SpongeBob: Plankton?! What the barnacles is going on here?
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': That's right! I stole me own formular!
  
Mr. Krabs: You see, we had a bet. Plankton's been trying for twenty years to steal me formula, and he's never done it.
+
'''SpongeBob''': But if you're Mr. Krabs, then who's... (the other Mr. Krabs rips off his suit to show the Robot Krabs from "Imitation Krabs") Mr. Krabs is a robot! (Robot Krabs opens its head up to reveal Plankton)
  
Plankton: I almost had it 37 times, and you know it!
+
'''Plankton''': No, you idiot.
  
Mr. Krabs: Tell it to the claw, sister. Last time he failed, we made a bet. (flashback to Mr Krabs laughing while Plankton is crying on the ground) You can't beat me, Plankton. I always win!
+
'''SpongeBob''': Plankton?! What the barnacles is going on here?
  
Plankton: You've got the easy part. I'd like to see you do my job.
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': You see, we had a bet. Plankton's been trying for twenty years to steal me formula, and he's never done it.
  
Mr. Krabs: Oh, yeah right. If I was you, I could steal me formular me try.
+
'''Plankton''': I almost had it 37 times, and you know it!
  
Plankton: Ha! The usual wager?
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Tell it to the claw, sister. Last time he failed, we made a bet. (flashback to Mr Krabs laughing while Plankton is crying on the ground) You can't beat me, Plankton. I always win!
  
Mr. Krabs: You're on. (flashback ends) So, through a series of events far too elaborate to go into right now, we flawlessly assumed each others lives and I beat Plankton at his own game... and destroyed his place of business!! (laughs) Now pay up.
+
'''Plankton''': You've got the easy part. I'd like to see you do my job.
  
Plankton: Here you go, Eugene! (takes out a dollar) One a-dollar!
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': Oh, yeah right. If I was you, I could steal me formular on me first try.
  
Patrick: Not so fast! (rips his suit off to reveal Squidward)
+
'''Plankton''': Ha! The usual wager?
  
SpongeBob: Squidward? Then who are you?
+
'''Mr. Krabs''': You're on. (flashback ends) So, through a series of events far too elaborate to go into right now, we flawlessly assumed each others lives and I beat Plankton at his own game... and destroyed his place of business!! (laughs) Now pay up.
  
Squidward: I'm not... (SpongeBob tears off his face) ...wearing a disguise.
+
'''Plankton''': Here you go, Eugene! (takes out a dollar) One a-dollar!
  
SpongeBob: Hmmm, if he's Squidward, then you must be... (fake Squidward rips off his suit to reveal Sandy) ...Sandy?
+
'''Patrick''': Not so fast! (rips his suit off to reveal Squidward)
  
Sandy: Whoops, wrong outfit. (rips off suit to reveal another SpongeBob)
+
'''SpongeBob''': Squidward? Then who are you?
  
SpongeBob: (gasping) OOOOOOHHHHH!! You're me! Then I must be... (rips off his suit to reveal Patrick)
+
'''Squidward''': I'm not... (SpongeBob tears off his face) ...wearing a disguise.
  
Patrick: Patrick!
+
'''SpongeBob''': Hmmm, if he's Squidward, then you must be... (fake Squidward rips off his suit to reveal Sandy) ...Sandy?
  
SpongeBob: Nah, I'm just kidding. (rips off the SpongeBob suit and reveals another Patrick)
+
'''Sandy''': Whoops, wrong outfit. (rips off suit to reveal another SpongeBob)
  
Patrick: I really am Patrick. (laughs. Other Patrick rips off his suit to reveal SpongeBob again)
+
'''SpongeBob''': (gasping) OOOOOOHHHHH!! You're me! Then I must be... (rips off his suit to reveal Patrick)
  
SpongeBob: Good one, Patrick! (both laugh) There's just one thing I don't understand.
+
'''Patrick''': Patrick!
  
Mr. Krabs What's that, laddie?
+
'''SpongeBob''': Nah, I'm just kidding. (rips off the SpongeBob suit and reveals another Patrick)
  
SpongeBob: That. (points to two Patrick's laughing beside each other)
+
'''Patrick''': I really am Patrick. (laughs. Other Patrick rips off his suit to reveal SpongeBob again)
  
{{Template:Transcripts/Season 5}}
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'''SpongeBob''': Good one, Patrick! (both laugh) There's just one thing I don't understand.
  
 +
'''Mr. Krabs''': What's that, laddie?
  
 +
'''SpongeBob''': That. (points to two Patricks laughing beside each other)
  
 +
{{Transcripts/Season 5 Ver. 2}}
 
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Latest revision as of 01:28, 11 April 2023

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Fungus Among Us Boat Smarts

Episode Article: Spy Buddies

[edit] Characters

[edit] Dialogue

(a shadow that looks like Plankton walks up to the Krusty Krab and gets inside using the code. He goes back into the office and opens up the safe and gets out the formula. SpongeBob turns on the lights to reveal the shadow is Mr. Krabs)

SpongeBob: What are you doing, Mr. Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: Just making sure the Krabby Patty formula is safe. Plankton hasn't tried to steal the formula in over a month. He must be planning something big.

Squidward: (walks in) Hello.

Mr. Krabs: One of you will have to volunteer for some extra work.

Squidward: (walks out) Good-bye.

Mr. Krabs: I was just gonna ask if someone can spy on Plankton.

SpongeBob: Spy?! Ooh! (acts like James Bond)

Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob, I can see you through this straw.

SpongeBob: Patrick, I'm gonna be a spy.

Patrick: You're a spy?! I wanna be a spy, too!

Mr. Krabs: Shh! Okay, okay! You can be a spy. Just be quiet.

SpongeBob and Patrick: Hooray, we're spy buddies! (Mr. Krabs stammers. SpongeBob & Patrick whisper) Spy buddies.

Mr. Krabs: Your instructions are on this Krabby Patty. But remember, the fate of the Krusty Krab rests in your hands, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: In my hands... ooh!

Patrick: (examines SpongeBob’s hand) Ooh. (cut to SpongeBob’s house later that night where SpongeBob pushes the button on the patty)

Mr. Krabs: Your mission --if you choose to accept it-- is to discover what Plankton's up to. Don't let him out of your sight. And you'll need to rustle up some spy gadgets. If you don't accept it, you're fired! This patty will self-destruct in ten seconds. (both scream and run around while the patty is beeping)

SpongeBob: Get rid of it! Get rid of it, Patrick! (Patrick puts the patty in his pants. It explodes and leaves the bottom half of his body without any skin)

Patrick: That's gonna leave a mark. (bubble-wipe to Sandy's Treedome)

SpongeBob: Hey, Sandy.

Sandy: Hey, SpongeBob, Patrick. What y'all doing?

SpongeBob: Do you know anything about spying, Sandy?

Sandy: Well, I know you need a lot of crazy gadgets like jet-packs and laser-equipped Bermuda shorts with walkie-talkies.

Walkie-talkie: 10-4, good buddy. (static)

Sandy: Cameras that fit up your nose, high-powered magnifying glass, and my favorite, the knockout ray. (blasts SpongeBob and Patrick with it causes them to knockout. Then blasts them again making them wake up)

SpongeBob: Wow, Sandy, with these gadgets, Patrick and I will be great spies.

Sandy: (laughs) I wouldn't trust you two with any of this stuff.

SpongeBob: What do we do now, Patrick? (Patrick picks up the knockout ray and knocks Sandy out. Both laugh. Bubble-wipe to the city where SpongeBob and Patrick are spying from the side of a building)

Patrick: What's he doing now?

SpongeBob: Nothing yet. Wait! Wait! He's... (Plankton walks into "Guppies R Us") ...buying baby clothes? We gotta get closer.

Plankton: Excuse me? (holds up a small pink outfit) Do you have anything in a size negative five?

Employee: (laughs) Uh, sorry, bud, that's as small as they come. (takes the outfit. SpongeBob enlarges himself in the clothes on the wall)

SpongeBob: Wow, Plankton has to buy baby clothes? (Patrick enlarges himself in the outfit next to SpongeBob)

Patrick: How embarrassing. (Plankton walks out of "Guppies R Us". SpongeBob walks out a couple seconds later)

SpongeBob: SpongeBob to Krabs. Come in Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Krabs here. Go ahead.

SpongeBob: Plankton just bought some baby clothes.

Mr. Krabs: (writes 'baby clothes' on a nearby chalkboard) Baby clothes? Hmm... What's he doing now?

SpongeBob: Hold on. (looks through store window) He's buying...

Mr. Krabs: Yeah? Yeah?

SpongeBob: A... stamp.

Mr. Krabs: A stamp. (writes it on the chalkboard) This is the most elaborate scheme ever. Keep on him, SpongeBob. (cut to later where SpongeBob and Patrick are tip-toeing behind Plankton)

SpongeBob: We're right behind him and he has no idea. (from Plankton's POV, the tip-toes are thunderous steps. He turns around)

Plankton: Would you stop making all that racket? (from SpongeBob and Patrick's POV, Plankton is squeaking as he talks so they can't understand him)

Patrick: What's he doing now?

SpongeBob: I can't tell. (they walk again but SpongeBob is shining a light on Plankton from the magnifying glass)

Plankton: Phew! Gosh, it's hot. (catches on fire and runs away screaming)

SpongeBob: He's getting away! Quick, Patrick, use the jet-pack!

Patrick: Can do! (pushes a button and Patrick grabs SpongeBob as they fly toward Plankton. Plankton jumps into a soda drink and puts himself out)

Plankton: Phew. Huh? (SpongeBob and Patrick are fly over Plankton, setting him and the cup on fire, while they fly through buildings. The jet-pack detaches itself from Patrick and they both skid on the sidewalk. When they stand up, their faces and bodies are deformed)

SpongeBob: Boy, it was lucky the sidewalk broke our fall. But we lost Plankton!

Patrick: To the spy mobile! (both hop into a car)

SpongeBob: Hmmm... mines, oil slick, smoke screen, shield...

Patrick: Self-destruct! (pushes button and the car explodes. Both laugh and shake off the dust. Patrick's pants phone is ringing) There's a call coming through on my Pants-A-Phone.

Mr. Krabs: (from the Pants-A-Phone) Krabs to Agent SpongeBob. Come in SpongeBob.

Patrick: It's for you.

SpongeBob: Agent SpongeBob here.

Mr. Krabs: You found out what Plankton's up to?

SpongeBob: I'm afraid we lost him, Mr. Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Well, find him, lad. I'm not paying you to goof off with Patrick.

SpongeBob: You're not paying me at all, Mr. Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Exactly. So get to work. (hangs up)

Recording: If you'd like to make a call, please deposit twenty-five cents. (SpongeBob gets out a quarter. Bubble-wipe to the Chum Bucket at night. SpongeBob and Patrick are on the roof)

SpongeBob: OK, Patrick, we're in position. Now how do we get inside?

Patrick: I think the front door's open.

SpongeBob: Spies don't use the front door, Patrick. We've got to figure out a complicated way to get inside.

Patrick: This looks like a job for Patrick Star Laser Pants! (shoots a laser out of his behind and cuts out a square on the roof) Ooh!!

SpongeBob: Good work, Patrick! Now it's my turn. (drops down inside, with the rope tied around him. Lowers himself but hits the floor) I thought you were holding the rope. (Patrick lands on top of him)

Patrick: I am. You need to be quiet. We're on a secret mission!

Plankton: (turns on the lights) Secret mission, eh? {SpongeBob and Patrick scream} Don't you think I know what you're up to? You want to eat at the Chum Bucket without your boss knowing. Karen, we've got a customer! (cut to SpongeBob and Patrick sitting at a table holding menus and Plankton standing on the table) I'll let you two look over the menu. (He jumps off and walks away)

Patrick: SpongeBob, I have to go.

SpongeBob: Oh, can't you go later?

Patrick: (groans) My laser pants aren't working right. (shoots a laser at the salt shaker on the other table. Patrick sighs)

Plankton: Could I interest you in a raspberry ice tea?

Patrick: Uh, no thanks.

Plankton: Or perhaps a bran muffin?

Patrick: (groans again) SpongeBob, I have to go now!

Plankton: Prune Danish? (sees Patrick's behind wiggle. Patrick groans again) What the...? (cut to outside the Chum Bucket where Patrick's laser pants makes holes everywhere and destroys the Chum Bucket. Later, the floor opens up and a blimp emerges with Plankton controlling it from the inside and SpongeBob and Patrick lying on top. Patrick sits up while SpongeBob continues to lie down) Destroy my lab, will ya, Krabs? Well, if it's war you want, it's war you'll get! (flies his blimp over to the Krusty Krab. The inside of the Krusty Krab gets darker)

Mr. Krabs: Is it dark or have I put up with cataract surgery too long?

Squidward: No, Mr. Krabs, it's that time of the month.

Mr. Krabs: (sees the blimp) Merciful Neptune. (red light flashes) Man your battle stations!

Squidward: I'm on it! (runs into the bathroom and flushes a toilet)

Mr. Krabs: (raises himself in the crow's nest) Bring it on, Plankton.

Plankton: Oh, I will. We'll see if you have a customer left after I pump up the volume. (loud 50's pop music plays. All the customers cover their ears)

Fish: Oh, brother, I hated the real version of this song. (customers leave)

Mr. Krabs: He's driving me customers away! Alright, Plankton, you want my customers so badly? You can have 'em! (sucks them all up and launches them through a cannon at the blimp)

Plankton: Do your worst, Krabs!

Squidward: (hits the blimp) I hate my job.

SpongeBob: (watching from the top of the blimp) It's up to you and me, buddy.

Patrick: Abandon ship! (jumps off the blimp and lands in the cannon. Gets shot out towards the blimp)

Plankton: Point-headed projectile on the port side! (Patrick makes a hole in the blimp, causing it to fly into the Krusty Krab)

Mr. Krabs: No! (the blimp hits the Krusty Krab and destroys it)

Plankton: (standing on the Krusty Krab sign with a piece of paper in his hand) I win! I always win!

SpongeBob: Not to rain on your parade or anything, but you always lose.

Plankton: No, SpongeBob, I always... (removes his head to reveal that of Mr. Krabs)

Mr. Krabs: ...win!

SpongeBob: (gasps) Mr. Krabs?

Mr. Krabs: That's right! I stole me own formular!

SpongeBob: But if you're Mr. Krabs, then who's... (the other Mr. Krabs rips off his suit to show the Robot Krabs from "Imitation Krabs") Mr. Krabs is a robot! (Robot Krabs opens its head up to reveal Plankton)

Plankton: No, you idiot.

SpongeBob: Plankton?! What the barnacles is going on here?

Mr. Krabs: You see, we had a bet. Plankton's been trying for twenty years to steal me formula, and he's never done it.

Plankton: I almost had it 37 times, and you know it!

Mr. Krabs: Tell it to the claw, sister. Last time he failed, we made a bet. (flashback to Mr Krabs laughing while Plankton is crying on the ground) You can't beat me, Plankton. I always win!

Plankton: You've got the easy part. I'd like to see you do my job.

Mr. Krabs: Oh, yeah right. If I was you, I could steal me formular on me first try.

Plankton: Ha! The usual wager?

Mr. Krabs: You're on. (flashback ends) So, through a series of events far too elaborate to go into right now, we flawlessly assumed each others lives and I beat Plankton at his own game... and destroyed his place of business!! (laughs) Now pay up.

Plankton: Here you go, Eugene! (takes out a dollar) One a-dollar!

Patrick: Not so fast! (rips his suit off to reveal Squidward)

SpongeBob: Squidward? Then who are you?

Squidward: I'm not... (SpongeBob tears off his face) ...wearing a disguise.

SpongeBob: Hmmm, if he's Squidward, then you must be... (fake Squidward rips off his suit to reveal Sandy) ...Sandy?

Sandy: Whoops, wrong outfit. (rips off suit to reveal another SpongeBob)

SpongeBob: (gasping) OOOOOOHHHHH!! You're me! Then I must be... (rips off his suit to reveal Patrick)

Patrick: Patrick!

SpongeBob: Nah, I'm just kidding. (rips off the SpongeBob suit and reveals another Patrick)

Patrick: I really am Patrick. (laughs. Other Patrick rips off his suit to reveal SpongeBob again)

SpongeBob: Good one, Patrick! (both laugh) There's just one thing I don't understand.

Mr. Krabs: What's that, laddie?

SpongeBob: That. (points to two Patricks laughing beside each other)


Transcripts Episodes
Season 1 Season 1
Season 2 Season 2
Season 3 Season 3
Season 4 Season 4
Season 5 Season 5
Season 6 Season 6
Season 7 Season 7
Season 8 Season 8
Season 9 Season 9
Season 10 Season 10
Season 11 Season 11
Season 12 Season 12
Season 13 Season 13
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