Episode Transcript: Back to the Past
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Episode Article: Back to the Past
- Mermaid Man
- Barnacle Boy
- Man Ray
- Squilliam (minor role)
- Dirty Bubble (cameo)
- Retro Mermaid Man (voiced by Adam West)
- Retro Barnacle Boy (voiced by Burt Ward)
- Many alternate SpongeBobs, Patricks, Mermaid Mans, Barnacle Boys, and Man Rays
SpongeBob: Oh boy Jelly fishing, I can’t wait! Can you Patrick? (Patrick is eating tartar sauce.)Patrick? Patrick?
Patrick: Did you say something?
SpongeBob: I said… (Gets hit in the eye with a jelly fishing net) Ow!
Patrick: I’m sure how to respond to that.
SpongeBob: (Gasps happily) Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy!(Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy are sleeping)
Barnacle Boy: Hey we’re stuck here remember! (to Mermaid Man)
First Mermaid Man: Why is that?
First Barnacle Boy: Because you forgot to turn the motobeel.
SpongeBob: Oh heroes! Is there anything we can do? (Episode goes to where SpongeBob and Patrick are pushing Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy while they grunt and get tired.)So is that it?
First Barnacle Boy: Yes but we don’t usually do this but in term for pushing of those hills. There’s something we’d like you to see, but you must promise to not touch anything.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Okay! (Episode goes to where Barnacle Boy opens the locker door) Wow!
SpongeBob: Oh the magic clock from episode 1582! Man Ray’s power glove.
Patrick: A pair of binoculars.
First Mermaid Man: Yes boys, this is our locker of memories. It contains uh! Uh! I can’t remember.
First Barnacle Boy: All these thing contain memories of superheroic adventures.
Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob! Take a look at this.
SpongeBob: It's Dirty Bubbles' Bubble Launcher!
First Barnacle Boy: Right.(Barnacle Boy launches Dirty Bubble)
Dirty Bubble: Hahahahaha! (SpongeBob and Patrick quack because they're frightened.)
First Barnacle Boy: Hehehe, frightened boys?
SpongeBob and Patrick: Ye...ah...!
First Barnacle Boy: Don't afraid. (He pops Dirty Bubble)
Mermaid Man: And till someone makes troubles, there is no thing for afraid!
(Episode goes to time machine's location.)
First Barnacle Boy: This is our time machine. It transports us to future or past, according to time and location that we choose.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Ooo!
First Barnacle Boy: Unfortunately, the cosmoses who are all ordering the order of history are so dangerous; we chose to leave it alone so you mustn’t touch…
Patrick: (Yells) Hey the snack machine took my quarter. I want my crunchy munchinies.
First Barnacle Boy: No!
Patrick: Stupid box! (presses the start button on the time machine and the alarm goes off). How do I get that thing fixed?
First Barnacle Boy: You fool you realized what you’ve done?
Patrick: Well I lost a quarter.
(Episode goes to where they all scream all the way in the time machine)
SpongeBob: Oh where are we? (He sees a sign "Bikini Bottom , population 38" and Gasps) It can’t be. Bikini Bottom has at least 39 people living here.
First Barnacle Boy: Maybe if you hadn’t touched the time machine like we told you Patrick, we wouldn’t be in this mess. Hopefully we hadn’t changed anything with our presence.
SpongeBob: Oh! Everything looks so fashioned.
First Man Ray: (laughs wickedly, destroys Bikini Bottom, and laughs wickedly a second time) I’m ready to rule the world and its riches. With this weapon, nothing can stop me.
Young Mermaid Man: That’s what you do.
First Man Ray: Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy!?
Young Mermaid Man: Sorry Man Ray, but I Mermaid Man and my ever co-op, Barnacle Boy, will fight you.
Young Barnacle Boy: You tangled with the wrong fishhook with justice Man Ray.
Young Mermaid Man: Now prepare for a heavening help with quick dry tartar sauce.
First Mermaid Man: Wow our bodies are so tight.
First Barnacle Boy: What went wrong?
Young Barnacle Boy: (Man Ray screams) Jumpin Jellyfish, what happened to the tartar sauce?
Patrick: (Burps) Good thing that was around. I was starving.
First Man Ray: (shoots up the Tartar Sauce can up while laughing)
Patrick: This is creeping me out.
SpongeBob: Well but Patrick what about Mermaid Man And Barnacle Boy?
Patrick: Well I don’t got time for that.
First Mermaid Man: Where are you going boys?
Patrick:( Episode goes to where SpongeBob and Patrick are in the locker.) I just want to go home!!!
First Barnacle Boy: When are we going to have those two classified as villains? (The locker shrinks and disappears)
First Mermaid Man: They left us here. What are we going to do? I’m sure it’ll all work out.
Young Mermaid Man: Don’t worry, Mermaid Man And Barnacle Boy are always here to help the elderly. There’s something familiar about these two, Barnacle Boy… But I just can’t remember. I just can’t put my flipper on it.
Young Barnacle Boy: Hey neat hat.
First Barnacle Boy: Thanks I… uh… (Man Ray laughs wickedly)
Young Mermaid Man: Let’s get these poor defenseless saviors out of harm’s way.
SpongeBob and Patrick :(Episode goes to where they scream on the way back.)
Patrick: Well, that’s more like it making good old present day Bikini Bottom. (They enter the city, but its name is now "Man-rayo-polis"!)
SpongeBob: Yes Patrick we were all born in our places of time. Hello fellas citizen. (But that 'citizen' now has a camera head.) Hello Squilliam.
Squilliam: Man Ray is great.
SpongeBob: Yeah. Must be taking care of his oppugations.
Patrick: Well I’ll teach him Jay what?
SpongeBob: I uh Patrick do you notice anything different about our prison.
Patrick: Sorry I couldn’t hear you over the clatter of prison chains.
SpongeBob: I said is there something odd about Bikini Bottom since we got back.
Patrick: No! But yes! Just look at the giant medicine billboard. It’s missing a bolt on the bottom right corner.
SpongeBob: Even worse than that Patrick. The police got new uniforms.
Patrick: Oh no! What did they do with those old ones?
SpongeBob: Ah ye. What happened to the Krusty Krab? (Reads the sign) "The designed area where you are permitted by Man Ray, your ruler, to obtain sandwiches using Man Ray dollars"? The city under life, tradity, and all this.
Patrick: I’m out of Man Ray dollars?
SpongeBob: No Patrick it means we somehow changed the course of history when we went to the past well, in this reality Man Ray is ruler. Oh we got to do something.
Patrick: For what?
SpongeBob: One of these suspecting citizens of the 3-World that do in a time crisis. See if I still have a job.
First Man Ray: Hey you’re not even fast enough.
SpongeBob: Hi Squidw… (Thought it was Squidward but realized it was Barnacle Boy)
Second Barnacle Boy: Yes?
SpongeBob: Barnacle Boy? What are you doing here?
Second Barnacle Boy: I’m just taking life in wasted stuff.
Second Mermaid Man: (Rings the bell) Order up.
SpongeBob: Mermaid Man...! He is wearing a hairnet...! What happened? Why are the two greatest heroes ever stuck in this greasy spoon not combating the evils of Man Ray?
Second Mermaid Man: I lost a desire and enough physique to fight long ago kid. Flipping patties is so much easier on the joints when you’re my age.
SpongeBob: What about the young “Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy”? Surly they refuse to surrender without a fight.
Second Mermaid Man: You spaghetti for bran’s kids? We are the younger ones. The older ones (is about to cry) lost our souls and buried in this very restaurant (cries).
SpongeBob: I’m so sorry for your loss of yourself.
Second Barnacle Boy: I hate to break up the memorial service but we’re out of tartar sauce out here.
Second Mermaid Man: Tartar Sauce? The topping that destroyed life as we knew it. If only my tartar sauce attack hadn’t failed that day, we wouldn’t be living in this wasteland. (But they've run out of tartar sauce.) We’re already out?
Patrick: Yep. It’s chewy that’s… (Burps)
Second Mermaid Man: I knew I recognized you from somewhere and you ate that tartar sauce on that day. You realized what you’ve done.
SpongeBob: Sorry Mermaid Man we didn’t mean to destroy your lives you held dear. What do we say to try to make things right. With your help of course.
Second Mermaid Man: I’m teaming up with you to do jack diddly squat! Besides, Man Ray had to buy the necks! O-E! Evil.
SpongeBob: Does that mean the defeat was so dramatic?
Second Mermaid Man: Barnacle… No! It means he put the electoral collar on me. That won’t allow me to leave the restaurant.
SpongeBob: Oh, let’s get the nasty thing off of you.
Second Mermaid Man: You two idiots have done enough damage already.
SpongeBob: I can’t get a good rip on it. I must need a better angle. Sorry sorry, Patrick can you give me a hand on here.
Second Mermaid Man: Keep away from me! (SpongeBob and Patrick grunting)
SpongeBob: (The Second “Mermaid Man” gets a bump on his head.) Ta dah! You're free. Can we coax you and Barnacle Boy out of retirement to save the new universe?
Second Mermaid Man: I suppose you’ve proven your medal but, I’ll have my eye on you two. Now let’s pop that Dirty Bubble.
SpongeBob: Actually, we’re fighting Man Ray.
Second Mermaid Man: Well in that case let the light house of justice shine on Ray Man.
SpongeBob: Okay I suppose that’s close enough. Back to the past jents to stop you from eating the tartar sauce again for the first time.
(Episode goes to where all scream in the time machine)
First Man Ray: (destroys Bikini Bottom and laughs twice) I am ready to rule the world and its riches.
Young Mermaid Man: Not so fast, Man Ray!
Young Barnacle Boy: We’ve got a little surprise for you.
Second Old Mermaid Man: (He and along with the SpongeBob, Patrick, and Second Barnacle Boy come out of the locker machine) Keep your tongue out of my tartar sauce!
First Mermaid Man: Imposters!
Second Old Mermaid Man: Who are you calling Imposters, Imposter? I must prevent our tartar sauce from being eaten by that... that fool!
First Old Mermaid Man: If I want my tartar sauce, I have to go through me first!
Second Old Mermaid Man: I’m gonna make you eat those words!
First Old Mermaid Man: Bring it! (The second beats the first) Take this! (beats the second) I’ll never let you win!
Second Old Mermaid Man: Oh yes I will!
Young Mermaid Man: What do you make of this, Barnacle Boy?
Young Barnacle Boy: Tangled Timeline, Mermaid Man. I...
First Man Ray (laughs wickedly): You old coops provided me the perfect distraction. Now, prepare to be disappeared!
Young Mermaid Man: Sounds good on paper, you prefayer of pure evil. But, fortunately, we all know what happens to paper underwater. Barnacle Boy, the tartar sauce! (They shake the can to pour tartar sauce on the First Man Ray, but only 2 Patricks come out from it, falling to the ground).
Second Patrick: Wow... I’ve never eaten that much tartar sauce.
First Patrick: Yes, you have.
Second Patrick: Well, it sure ain’t sittin’ right.
First Man Ray: (laughs wickedly) Foolish mools. Once again, your boffonery has given victory! (blows up the tartar sauce can) (Laughs wickedly) Oh, I’m going to save for this. It’s not every day I get to defeat Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy, 3 times over! (is about to shoot two SpongeBobs, Patricks and three Mermaid Mans and Barnacle Boys but another time machine comes.)
Third SpongeBob: (He, along with the third Patrick comes out of the machine.) Patrick! Don’t eat the tartar sauce!
First Man Ray: Ha! You’re too late. Your best friend beat you to it. Now, prepare to taste laser! (Another time machine appears with the fourth SpongeBob and Patrick falling out of it, screaming) (Confused) So, how…?
Fifth SpongeBob: (Another time machine appears, the door opens, revealing the fifth SpongeBob and sixth Patrick.) I told you, we had to go back further!
First Man Ray: Uh...? (Tries to think, but another time machine shows up)
Third Mermaid Man: Up, up, and away! (The third old Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy jump out and fall to the ground.)
Sixth SpongeBob: (another time machine opens with the sixth Patrick also) Now, Patrick! (He, along with the sixth Patrick pour tartar sauce on the third Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy and drops the can on them.)
First Man Ray: I can’t get my head around this. Where are they all coming from? (another time machine shows up) Another machine? (the second Man Ray comes out)
Second Man Ray: (shoots his own whole time machine and laughs wickedly) I took care of your blasted time machine! (laughs again and flies away)
First Man Ray: Oh... I’ve got to sit down and think this through.
Young Mermaid Man: (chains the first Man Ray) Gotcha! You’ll have plenty of time for thinking in the Stony Lonesome.
First Man Ray: Uh... I’m sorry. Did you say something? I’m still trying to comprehend what just happened here.
Young Mermaid Man: It’s pretty simple, really. You were defeated by a codry of continuum cruising crime stoppers. Thank you, SpongeBob and Patrick.
Four SpongeBobs and Two Patricks: You’re Welcome!
Seven SpongeBobs and Six Patricks: ( another time machine which holds seven SpongeBobs and six Patricks comes) Oh, hi there! Hello! Hello! Hello!
One of SpongeBobs: We just wanted to come back and revisit the day that evil was defeated forever.
SpongeBobs: (another time machine appears) Hey, how you doing?
Patricks: We’re here.
SpongeBobs and Patricks: (two time machines appear) Oh hi there! How you doing?
SpongeBobs and Patricks: Hello! Hello!
SpongeBobs and Patricks: (more appear) Oh hi there!(More and More appear while the episode pans into outer space). Hello! Hello!
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