Episode Transcript: Back to the Past

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SpongeBob's Last Stand	The Bad Guy Club for Villains

Episode Article: Back to the Past

Characters

SpongeBob
Patrick
Mermaid Man
Barnacle Boy
Man Ray
Squilliam (minor role)
Dirty Bubble (cameo)
Retro Mermaid Man (voiced by Adam West)
Retro Barnacle Boy (voiced by Burt Ward)
Many alternate SpongeBobs, Patricks, Mermaid Mans, Barnacle Boys, and Man Rays

Dialogue

Spongepatbob (SpongeBob): Oh boy Jelly fishing, I can’t wait! Can you Patrick? (Rick (Patrick) is eating tartar sauce.)Patrick? Patrick?

Rick: Did you say something?

Spongepatbob: I said… (Gets hit in the eye with a jelly fishing net) Ow!

Rick: I’m sure how to respond to that.

Spongepatbob: (Gasps happily) Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy (the first old “Mermaid Man” and Barnacle Man are sleeping)!

Barnacle Man: Hey we’re stuck here remember (to Mermaid Man)?

First Old Mermaid Man: Why is that?

Barnacle Man: Because you forgot to turn the motobeel.

SpongePatbob: Oh heroes! Is there anything we can do? (Episode goes to where Spongepatbob and Rick are pushing Mermaid Man and Barnacle Man while they grunt and get tired.)So is that it?

Barnacle Man: Yes but we don’t usually do this but in term for pushing of those hills. There’s something we’d like you to see, but you must promise to not touch anything.

Spongepatbob and Rick: Okay! (Episode goes to where Barnacle Man opens the locker door) Wow!

SpongePatbob: Oh the magic clock from episode 1582! Man Ray’s power glove.

Rick: A pair of binoculars.

First Old Mermaid Man: Yes boys, this is our locker of memories. It contains uh! Uh! I can’t remember.

Spongepatbob and Rick: Ooo!

Barnacle Man: Unfortunately, the cosmoses who are all ordering the order of history are so dangerous; we chose to leave it alone so you mustn’t touch…

Rick :( Yells) Hey the snack machine took my quarter. I want my crunchy munchinies.

Barnacle Man: No!

Rick: Stupid box (presses the start button on the time machine and the alarm goes off). How do I get that thing fixed?

Barnacle Man: You fool you realized what you’ve done?

Rick: Well I lost a quarter.

Spongepatbob, Rick, Mermaid Man, and Barnacle Man :( Episode goes to where they all scream all the way in the time machine)

Spongepatbob: Oh where are we? (Gasps) It can’t be. Bikini Bottom has at least 39 people living here.

Barnacle Man: Maybe if you hadn’t touched the time machine like we told you Patrick, we wouldn’t be in this mess. Hopefully we hadn’t changed anything with our presence.

Spongepatbob: Oh! Everything looks so fashioned.

First Man Ray: (laughs wickedly, destroys Bikini Bottom, and laughs wickedly a reprise) I’m ready to rule the world and its riches.

With this weapon, nothing can stop me.

Young Mermaid Man: That’s what you do.

Young Barnacle Boy: You tangled with the wrong fishhook with justice Man Ray.

Young Mermaid Man: Now prepare for a heavening help with quick dry tartar sauce.

First Old Mermaid Man: Wow our bodies are so tight.

Barnacle Man: What went wrong?

Young Barnacle Boy: (Man Ray screams) Jumpin Jellyfish, what happened to the tartar sauce?

Rick: (Burps) Good thing that was around. I was starving.

Man Ray: (shoots up the Tartar Sauce can up while laughing)

Rick: This is creeping me out.

Spongepatbob: Well but Patrick what about Mermaid Man And Barnacle Boy?

Rick: Well I don’t got time for that.

First Old Mermaid Man: Where are you going boys?

Rick:( Episode goes to where Spongepatbob and Rick are in the locker.) I just want to go home.

Barnacle Man: When are we going to have those two classified as villains?

First Old Mermaid Man: They left us here. What are we going to do? I’m sure it’ll all work out.

Young Mermaid Man: Don’t worry Mermaid Man And Barnacle Boy are always here to help the alderly. There’s something familiar about these two Barnacle Boy…I just can’t remember. I just can’t put my flipper on it.

Young Barnacle Boy: Hey neat hat.

Barnacle Man: Thanks I… uh… (Man Ray laughs wickedly)

Young Mermaid Man: Let’s get these poor defenseless saviors out of harm’s way.

Spongepatbob and Rick :( Episode goes to where they scream on the way back.)

Rick: Well, that’s more like it making good old present day Bikini Bottom.

Spongepatbob: Yes Patrick we were all born in our places of time. Hello fellas citizen. Hello Squillium.

Squillium: Man Ray is great.

Spongepatbob: Yeah. Must be taking care of his oppugations.

Rick: Well I’ll teach him Jay what?

Spongepatbob: I uh Patrick do you notice anything different about our prison.

Rick: Sorry I couldn’t hear you over the clatter of prison chains.

Spongepatbob: I said is there something odd about Bikini Bottom since we got back.

Rick: No! But yes! Just look at the giant medicine billboard. It’s missing a bolt on the bottom right corner.

Spongepatbob: Even worse than that Patrick. The police got new uniforms.

Rick: Oh no! What did they do with those old ones?

Spongepatbob: Ah ye. What happened to the Krusty Krab? (Reads the sign)The designed area where you are permitted by Man Ray, your ruler, to obtain sandwiches using Man Ray dollars? The city under life, tradity, and all this.

Rick: I’m out of Man Ray dollars?

Spongepatbob: No Patrick it means we somehow changed the course of history when we went to the past well, in this reality Man Ray is ruler. Oh we got to do something.

Rick: For what?

Spongepatbob: One of these suspecting citizens of the 3-World that do in a time crisis. See if I still have a job.

First Man Ray: Hey you’re not even fast enough.

Spongepatbob: Squidw… (Thought it was Patsquidward but realized it was Barnacle Man)

Barnacle Man: Yes?

Spongepatbob: Barnacle Boy? What are you doing here?

Barnacle Man: I’m just taking life in wasted stuff.

First Old Mermaid Man: (Rings the bell) Order up.

Spongepatbob: Mermaid Man is wearing a hairnet. What happened? Why are the two greatest heroes ever stuck in this greasy spoon not combating the evils of Man Ray?

First Old Mermaid Man: I lost a desire and enough physique to fight long ago kid. Flipping patties is so much easier on the joints when you’re my age.

Spongepatbob: What about the young “Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy”? Surly they refuse to surrender without a fight.

First Old Mermaid Man: You spaghetti for bran’s kids? We are the younger ones. The older ones (is about to cry) lost our souls and buried in this very restraunt (cries).

Spongepatbob: I’m so sorry for your loss of yourself.

Barnacle Man: I hate to break up the memorial service but we’re out of tartar sauce out here.

First Old Mermaid Man: Tartar Sauce? The topping that destroyed life as we knew it. If only my tartar sauce attack hadn’t failed that day, we wouldn’t be living in this wasteland. We’re already out.

Rick: Yep. It’s chewy that’s… (Burps)

First Old Mermaid Man: I knew I recognized you from somewhere and you ate that tartar sauce on that day. You realized what you’ve done.

Spongepatbob: Sorry Mermaid Man we didn’t mean to destroy your lives you held dear. What do we say to try to make things right. With your help of course.

First Old Mermaid Man: I’m teaming up with you to do jack diddly squat! Besides, Man Ray had to buy the necks! O-E! Evil.

Spongpatbob: Does that mean the defeat was so dramatic.

First Old Mermaid Man: Barnacle… No! It means he put the electoral collar on me. That won’t allow me to leave the restraunt.

Spongepatbob: Oh, let’s get the nasty thing off of you.

First Old Mermaid Man: You two idiots have done enough damage already.

Spongepatbob: I can’t get a good rip on it. I must need a better angle. Sorry sorry, Patrick can you give me a hand on here.

First Old Mermaid Man: Keep away from me (Spongepatbob and Rick grunting)

First Spongepatbob: (The First Old “Mermaid Man” gets a bump on his head.)Ta da! Now can we coax you and Barnacle Boy out of retirement to save the new universe?

First Old Mermaid Man: I suppose you’ve proven your medal but, I’ll have my eye on you two. Now let’s pop that Dirty Bubble.

Spongepatbob: Actually we’re fighting Man Ray.

First Old Mermaid Man: Well in that case let the light house of justice shine on Ray Man.

Spongepatbob: Okay I suppose that’s close enough. Back to the past jents to stop you from eating the tartar sauce again for the first time.

The First “Spongepatbob, Rick, Old Mermaid Man, and Barnacle Man”: (Episode goes to where all scream in the time machine)

Second Man Ray: (destroys Bikini Bottom and laughs twice) I am ready to rule the world and its riches.

Young Mermaid Man: Not so fast Man Ray.

Young Barnacle Boy: We’ve got a little surprise for you.

Second Old Mermaid Man: (He and along with the Second “Spongepatbob, Rick, and Barnacle Man” come out of the locker machine) Keep your tongue out of the tartar sauce.

First Old Mermaid Man: Imposters.

Second Old Mermaid Man: Who are you calling Imposters Imposter? I must prevent our tartar sauce from being eaten by that fool.

First Old Mermaid Man: If I want my tartar sauce I have to go through me first.

Second Old Mermaid Man: I’ll make you eat those words.

First Old Mermaid Man: Bring it (The second beats the first). Take this (beats the second). I’ll never let you win.

Second Old Mermaid Man: Oh yes I will.

Young Mermaid Man: What do you make of this?

Young Barnacle Boy: Tangled timeline Mermaid Man.

Second Man Ray (laughs wickedly): You old coops provided me the perfect distraction. Now prepare to be disappeared.

Young Mermaid Man: Sounds good on paper you prefayer on evil but fortunately we all know what happens to paper underwater. Barnacle Boy the tartar sauce (poor tartar sauce on the “Second Man Ray”).

First Rick: I’ve really eaten that much tartar sauce. Rick: Yes you have.

Second Rick: Well it sure ends in right.

Second Man Ray: (laughs wickedly) Foolish mools. Once Again moble foolerie has given victory (blows up the tartar sauce can). (Laughs wickedly)Oh I want to save for this. It’s not every day I get to defeat Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy 3 times over(is about to shoot two “Spongepatbobs”, Rick, two “Old Mermaid Mans and Barnacle Mans” but another locker comes.).

Third Spongepatbob: (He along with the third “Rick” comes out of the machine.) Patrick don’t eat the tartar sauce.

Second Man Ray: You’re too late. Your best friend beat you to it. Now prepare to taste the lazar (another time machine comes). So how…

Fourth Spongepatbob: (The time machine door with the fourth “Spongepatbob and Rick”.) I told you we had to go back farther.

Second Man Ray: Uh... (Thinks but another time machine comes)

Third Mermaid Man: Up, up, and away (The third “Mermaid Man and Barnacle Man” jump out and fall to the ground.).

Fifth Spongepatbob: (another time machine opens with the fifth “Rick” also) Now Patrick. (He along with the fifth “Rick” poor tartar sauce on the third “Mermaid Man and Barnacle Man” and drop the can on them.)

Second Man Ray: I can’t get my head around this. Where are they all coming from? (The first “Man Ray’s” machine comes) Another machine (the first “Man Ray” comes out)?

First Man Ray: (shoots his own whole time machine and laughs wickedly) I took care of your blasted time machine (laughs again and flies away).

Second Man Ray: Uh! I got to sit down and think this through.

Young Mermaid Man: (chains the Second “Man Ray”) Gotta! You’ve got plenty of time for thinking into stoling me lonesome.

Second Man Ray: I’m sorry, did you say something? I’m still trying to comprehend what just happened here.

Young Mermaid Man: It’s pretty simple really. You were defeated by a Conroy of continue for cruising crime stoppers. Thank you SpongeBob and Patrick.

Four “Spongepatbobs” and Two “Ricks”: You’re Welcome.

Sixth “Spongepatbobs and Ricks” :( another time machine (which holds seven “Spongepatbobs” and six “Ricks”) comes) Oh hi there! Hello! Hello! Hello!

One Other Spongepatbob: We just wanted to come back and revisit the day that evil was defeated forever.

Sixth “Spongepatbobs”: (another time machine appears) Hey, how you doing?

Seventh “Ricks”: We’re here.

Eighth and Ninth “Spongepatbobs and Ricks”: (two time machines appear) Oh hi there! How you doing?

Tenth “Spongepatbobs and Ricks”: Hello! Hello!

Last “Spongepatbobs and Ricks”: (more appear) Oh hi there!(More and More appear while the episode pans into outer space).Hello! Hello!

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