The Automatic Back Scratcher, Hair Comber, Nose Picker, and Ukulele Tuner 9000
The Automatic Back Scratcher, Hair Comber, Nose Picker, and Ukulele Tuner 9000 is an invention built by Mr. Dr. Professor Patrick and SpongeBob in Sandy Cheeks' house. The machine was built to prevent Sandy from leaving Bikini Bottom. This machine can do all of the things that the name suggests, though it malfunctioned at the end. The machine was only seen in the episode Chimps Ahoy.
 Things the Invention Does
- Scratches user's back
- Combs user's hair
- Picks user's nose
- Feeds user pudding
- Tunes user's ukelele
 Things the Invention Did when Malfunctioning
- Throws user out of seat
- Lights user's hair on fire
- Smashes ukulele on user's head
- Generally beats up user
- Says "I do not like you"
- On the seat there is text that says "Dr. Professur Patrick Rulez!"
- The Automatic Back scratcher, Hair Comber, Nose Picker, Ukulele Tuner 9000 has the longest name of any item in all episodes of SpongeBob.
- It makes pudding, yet pudding isn't in the machine's name.