Transcript: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie/Part 1

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==Dialogue==
 
==Dialogue==
 +
===Chapter 1: Opening (Real film sequence)===
 +
(the movie starts with the 2002 Paramount Pictures logo and a Nickelodeon Movies logo made for the film. A sky fades in with seagulls flying across while the titles "Paramount Pictures Presents," "A Nickelodeon Movies Production," and "in association with United Plankton Pictures" appear. Then a pirate on a look-out post is shown. He looks upwards to get a better look at something with his telescope. The screen then shows the view of the telescope, with a pirate on a dinghy shown)
  
'''Pirate #1:''' (He is in a small boat with a trunk) I got it! I got it! I got it!
+
'''Pirate #1:''' (with a trunk) I got it! I got it! I got it!
 
                    
 
                    
'''Pirate #2:''' Dinghy ahoy.
+
'''Pirate #2:''' (squints) Dinghy ahoy. (looks down to tell another pirate something) Dinghy off the port bow. Dinghy off the port bow!
 
                    
 
                    
'''Pirate #3:''' Dinghy off the port bow. Dinghy off the port bow! Dinghy off the port bow! Dinghy off the port bow. Captain, dinghy off the...Dinghy. (Lets Pirate #1 onto the ship, along with the trunk)  
+
'''Pirate #3:''' Dinghy off the port bow!  
 +
 
 +
'''Pirates:''' (offscreen) Dinghy off the port bow!  
 +
 
 +
'''Pirate #4:''' Captain, dinghy off the... (he is slammed in the face by a door as the captain walks on deck)
 +
 
 +
'''Captain:''' Dinghy. (lets the pirate in the dinghy onto the ship, along with the trunk)  
 
                    
 
                    
 
'''Pirate #1:''' I got it! I got it.
 
'''Pirate #1:''' I got it! I got it.
Line 11: Line 19:
 
'''Captain:''' Where is it?
 
'''Captain:''' Where is it?
  
'''Pirate #2:''' It's right here, captain. (Opens the trunk)
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'''Pirate #2:''' It's right here, captain.
 
                    
 
                    
'''Captain:''' I never thought I'd see it with me own eye. Tickets to The SpongeBob Movie! (The pirates cheer and they sail to the movie theater, singing the SpongeBob SquarePants theme song)
+
'''Captain:''' (opens the trunk) I never thought I'd see it with me own eye. (excitedly) Tickets to the SpongeBob movie! (the pirates cheer and they sail to the movie theater, singing the ''[[SpongeBob SquarePants (TV Show)|SpongeBob SquarePants]]'' theme song)
  
 
  '''Pirates:''' Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
 
  '''Pirates:''' Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
  SpongeBob SquarePants
+
  SpongeBob SquarePants.
Absorbent and yellow and porous is he
+
SpongeBob SquarePants
+
If nautical nonsense be something you wish
+
SpongeBob SquarePants
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Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish
+
SpongeBob SquarePants
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SpongeBob SquarePants
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SpongeBob SquarePants
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SpongeBob SquarePants
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SpongeBob SquarePa-nts! (The pirates hog the snack bar and get some popcorn.
+
They rush into the theater room, where the movie starts)       
+
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
'''French Narrator:''' The sea. So mysterious, so beautiful. So... wet. Our story begins in Bikini Bottom's popular undersea eatery - the Krusty Krab restaurant, where...  
+
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Back up. Back up. (''waves arms to back off at reporters/citizens'')
+
Absorbent and yellow and porous is he?
 +
SpongeBob SquarePants.
  
'''Fish #1:''' Hey, wait a minute.  
+
If nautical nonsense be something you wish?
 +
SpongeBob SquarePants.
  
'''Fish #2:''' What is happening?  
+
Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish?
 +
SpongeBob SquarePants.
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Please settle down. (Referring to the Krusty Krab) We've got a situation in there. I'd rather not discuss till me manager gets here.  
+
SpongeBob SquarePants.
 +
SpongeBob SquarePants.
 +
Sponge-Bob Square-Pants.
  
'''Fish:''' Look, there he is. (A limousine drives up)
+
SpongeBob SquarePants.
 +
SpongeBob SquarePants.
 +
Sponge-Bob Square-Pants.
  
(''SpongeBob climbs out of the limousine. He walks toward the Krusty Krab.'') Talk to me, Krabs.  
+
SpongeBob SquarePants.
 +
SpongeBob SquarePants.
 +
Sponge-Bob Square-Pants!
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' It started out as a simple order: a Krabby Patty with cheese. When the costumer took a bite, no cheese!
+
(the pirates hog the snack bar and get some popcorn. They rush into the theater room, where the movie starts)
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Get ahold of yourself, Eugene. I'm going in. (goes into the Krusty Krab)  
+
===Chapter 2: SpongeBob's Dream===
 +
'''French Narrator:''' (the film starts out on the familiar Bikini Atoll island) ''Ah, the sea. So mysterious, so beautiful. So... uhh... wet.'' (the camera pans down into Bikini Bottom and stops in front of the Krusty Krab) ''Our story begins in Bikini Bottom's popular undersea eatery, the Krusty Krab restaurant, where...'' (a policefish appears)
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Take it easy, friend. I'm the manager of this establishment. Everything's gonna be just fine.
+
'''Police:''' Back off! Back off! (waves arms to back off at reporters/citizens)
 
+
'''Phil:''' I'm really scared here, man.
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' You got a name?
+
'''French Narrator:''' ''Hey, wait a minute. What is happening?''
                 
+
'''Phil:''' Phil.
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' You got a family, Phil? (Phil begins to cry) Come on, Phil, stay with me. Let's hear about that family.
+
(the camera zooms out to show the Krusty Krab is surrounded by cops. The camera then pans to the left to reveal a red crab, Krusty Krab owner Eugene H. Krabs)
             
+
'''Phil:''' I got a wife and two beautiful children. That's what it's all about.
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' I want you to do me a favor, Phil.
+
'''Eugene H. Krabs:''' Please settle down... (referring to the Krusty Krab) We've got a situation in there! I'd rather not discuss 'til me manager gets here!
           
+
'''Phil:''' What?
+
             
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Say cheese. (SpongeBob carefully lifts the bun and puts some cheese under. He then comes out of the Krusty Krab with Phil in his arms) Order up.
+
                 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Three cheers for the manager! Hip! Hip! Hip! Hip! Hip! Hip! Hooray! (All of this is then shown to be a dream. SpongeBob is woken up by his alarm clock)
+
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------           
+
SpongeBob's Bedroom
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Gary, I had that dream again. And it's finally gonna come true. Today. Sorry about this, calendar. (Changes calendar) Because today is the grand-opening ceremony for The Krusty Krab where Mr. Krabs will announce the new manager. Who's it gonna be, Gary? Well, let's ask my wall of consecutive employee-of-the-month awards. (Camera pulls up, revealing many "employee of the month"
+
'''Female Fish:''' (offscreen) Look, there he is!
portraits) 
+
  
'''SpongeBobs on portraits:''' SpongeBob SquarePants.  
+
(a black, boat-shaped limousine with orange flames drives up. A yellow leg, which is wearing a black boot with an orange snake in the shape of an "S" on it, steps out of the limo when it is stopped. As the camera pans up, a yellow sponge, SpongeBob SquarePants, climbs out of the limo. He walks toward the Krusty Krab and blows a bubble)
  
'''SpongeBob:''' I'm ready. Promotion. (Brushes his teeth and washes up) Cleanliness is next to manager-liness. (Goes outside and runs around in circles) I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion.
+
'''SpongeBob SquarePants:''' Talk to me, Krabs.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
Squidward's Bathroom
+
  
(Squidward is taking a bath and singing. SpongeBob is now there and singing, too. Squidward  hears
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Oh, it started out as a simple order: a Krabby Patty with cheese. When the customer took a bite, no cheese! (cries, but SpongeBob slaps him)
him, turns around, and covers himself with the shower curtain)                  
+
  
'''Squidward:''' SpongeBob! What are you doing in here?             
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Get a hold of yourself, Eugene. I'm going in. (walks in and sees a fish, extremely nervous, looking at his Krabby Patty) Take it easy, friend. I'm the manager of this establishment. (puts a briefcase down on a table) Everything's gonna be just fine.
  
'''SpongeBob:''' I have to tell you something, Squidward.
+
'''Customer:''' I'm really scared here, man...
         
+
'''Squidward:''' Whatever it is, can't it wait until we get to work?
+
                 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' There's no shower at work.
+
  
'''Squidward:''' What do you want?
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (opens the briefcase) You got a name?
           
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I just wanted to say i'll be thanking you in my managerial acceptance speech today.
+
+
'''Squidward:''' Get out! (Throws him out the window)
+
                 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Okay. I'll see you at the ceremony. (Runs into Patrick, who comes out of his rock) 
+
         
+
'''Patrick:''' That sounds like the manager of the new Krusty Krab. Oops. Hold on. (Realizes that he doesn't have his shorts on. Rock closes up, with Patrick on it. Then it opens up again. Patrick now has his shorts) Congratulations, buddy.
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Oh, thanks, Patrick. And tonight, after my big promotion, we're gonna party till we're purple.
+
'''Customer:''' (nervously) Phil.
 
+
'''Patrick:''' I love being purple!
+
             
+
'''SpongeBob:''' We're going to the place where all the action is.
+
  
'''Patrick:''' You don't mean...?
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (puts on gloves) You got a family, Phil? (Phil chokes over his words, unable to speak. Snaps his fingers) Come on, Phil, stay with me. Let's hear about that family.
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Oh, I mean. Goofy Goober's Ice Cream Party Boat! (Rock closes up on them, and opens up a few seconds later. They now have Goofy Goober hats, and a record begins playing on a record player beside Patrick)
+
'''Phil:''' I got a wife and two beautiful children.
             
+
'''Patrick and SpongeBob:''' Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah. You're a Goofy Goober, yeah. We're all  Goofy Goobers, yeah. Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah.
+
           
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (Looks at his watch) I'd better get going. I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion.
+
  
'''Patrick:''' Good luck, SpongeBob. Hey, look for me at the ceremony. I got a little surprise for you.  
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (puts on a headset from the briefcase) That's what it's all about. I want you to do me a favor, Phil.
  
'''Patrick:''' I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah.
+
'''Phil:''' What?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------             
+
Outside the Krusty Krab
+
  
'''Perch Perkins:''' Hello, Bikini Bottom! Perch Perkins here, coming to you live from in front of The Krusty Krab restaurant, for years the only place to get a delicious and mouthwatering Krabby Patty. Until today, that is. That's right, folks. Longtime owner Mr. Krabs is opening a new restaurant called The Krusty Krab 2. First of all, congratulations, Mr. Krabs. (Krabs has a big grin on his face)
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (picks a slice of cheese out from his briefcase with some tweezers) Say "cheese." (dramatically and slowly attempts to put the cheese on the Krabby Patty. Kicks the door open, Phil in his arms. The crowd gasps. The cheese on the Krabby Patty sparkles) Order up.
                 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Hello. I like money.  
+
  
'''Perch Perkins:''' What inspired you to build a second Krusty Krab right next door to the original?
+
'''Crowd:''' (they cheer and lift SpongeBob up on their shoulders) Three cheers for the manager! Hip! Hip! (SpongeBob's alarm clock honks) Hip! Hip! (SpongeBob's alarm clock honks again) Hip! Hip! (SpongeBob's alarm clock honks a third time)
               
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Money.
+
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------                 
+
'''Plankton:''' (He is looking out the window of the Chum Bucket) Curses! It's not fair. Krabs is being interviewed by Perch Perkins, and I've never even had one customer!
+
  
'''Karen:''' Don't get worked up again, Plankton, I just mopped the floors.
+
===Chapter 3: SpongeBob Prepares for the Ceremony===
 +
(honk continues from dream; the screen now shows SpongeBob in his bedroom. He turns off his honking foghorn alarm clock)
  
'''Plankton:''' Oh, Karen, my computer wife, if only I could have managed to steal the secret to Krabs' success, the formula for the Krabby Patty. Then people would line up to eat at my restaurant. Lord knows I've tried. I've exhausted every evil plan in my filing cabinet...from
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Hooray! Gary, I had that dream again! And it's finally going to come true! (runs over to his calendar) Today! Sorry about this calendar. (tears off the calendar page for the day before to reveal "March 7." On the page, it has a picture of the Krusty Krab 2 with rainbows and hearts around it) Because today is the grand-opening ceremony for the Krusty Krab 2, where Mr. Krabs will announce the new manager.
A to Y.  
+
  
'''Karen:''' A to Y?
+
'''Gary the Snail:''' Meow.
                 
+
'''Plankton:''' Yeah, A to Y. You know, the alphabet.
+
                 
+
'''Karen:''' What about Z?
+
                 
+
'''Plankton:''' Z?
+
  
'''Karen:''' Z. The letter after Y.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Who's it gonna be, Gary? (chuckles to himself) Well, let's ask my wall of 374 consecutive employee-of-the-month awards. (the camera pulls up, revealing many "employee of the month" portraits)
             
+
'''Plankton:''' (Searches through cabinet) W, X, Y, Z. Plan Z! Here it is, just like you said.
+
Oh, boy. It's evil. It's diabolical. (Sniffs it) It's lemon-scented. This Plan Z can't possibly fail! (Goes outside) So enjoy today, Mr. Krabs, because by tomorrow, i'll have the formula.
+
Then everyone will eat at the Chum Bucket, and I will rule the world! All hail Plankton. All
+
hail Plank...! (SpongeBob runs by and accidentally steps on him)
+
         
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion. I think I stepped in something.
+
   
+
'''Plankton:''' Not in something, on someone, you twit.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Sorry, Plankton. (Pulls him off his shoe) Are you on your way to the grand-opening ceremony?
+
  
'''Plankton:''' No, I am not on my way over to the grand-opening ceremony. I'm busy planning to rule the world!
+
'''SpongeBob Employee of the Month Awards:''' SpongeBob SquarePants!
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Well, good luck with that. (Runs off) I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready.  
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I'm ready. Promotion. (goes into a walk-in shower, eats soap, inserts a hose in his head, and puffs up until soap comes out. Pulls out paper-like fabric, which he folds into his pants. the back springs off, revealing his rear, which he covers up. Blushes and walks off-screen sideways. Brushes his eyes with toothpaste and wipes off the foam) Cleanliness is next to manager-liness. (goes outside and runs around in circles) I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion. (the camera slowly zooms in on a house shaped liked an moai head, and the scene fades to a turquoise octopus, Squidward Tentacles, taking a shower)
Promotion.
+
  
'''Plankton:''' Stupid kid.
+
'''Squidward Tentacles:''' La da dee, la da doo, la da dum, La da dee, la da doo, la da dum...
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------     
+
Outside the Krusty Krab 2
+
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Welcome. Welcome, everyone, to the grand opening of The Krusty Krab 2.  
+
'''Squidward and SpongeBob:''' (in unison) La da dee, la da doo, la da dum, La da d...
  
'''Mrs. Puff:''' (only line) We paid $9 for this?  
+
'''Squidward:''' Huh?
  
'''Sandy:''' I paid $10!
+
'''SpongeBob:''' ...ee, la da doo, la da dum, Bum bum bum, Da da da...
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Now, before we begin with the ribbon-cutting, I'd like to announce the name of our new manager.
+
'''Squidward:''' (interrupts SpongeBob and covers himself) SpongeBob! What are you doing in here?!
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Yay! Yeah! Yeah! Now we're talking! Yeah!
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I have to tell you something, Squidward.
                 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Yes. Well, anyway...The new manager is a loyal, hard-working employee.
+
         
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Yes.
+
                 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' The obvious choice for the job.
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' He's right.
+
'''Squidward:''' Whatever it is, can't it wait until we get to work?
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' A name you all know. It starts with an S.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' There's no shower at work.
  
'''SpongeBob:''' That's me.
+
'''Squidward:''' What do you want?!
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Please welcome our new manager...Squidward Tentacles.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I just wanted to say I'll be thanking you in my managerial acceptance speech today.
             
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Yes! Yeah! (Shaking Squidwards hand) Oh, better luck next time, buddy. Yeah! All right! (Grabbing the Micriphone) People of Bikini Bottom, as the manager of...
+
                             
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' SpongeBob.
+
             
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Hold the phone, folks, I'm getting an important news flash from Mr. Krabs. Go ahead, Mr. K. (Mr. Krabs whispers into his ear. He tells him that he's making a jackass of himself) I'm making a complete what of myself? (Mr. Krabs wispers again) The most embarrassing thing you've ever seen? (Mr. Krabs whispers again) And now it's worse because I'm repeating everything you say into the microphone?
+
           
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Oh, for crying out loud, SpongeBob, you didn't get the job.
+
             
+
'''SpongeBob:''' What?
+
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' You did not get the job.
+
'''Squidward:''' '''GET OUT!''' (kicks SpongeBob out the window)
         
+
'''SpongeBob:''' But... But why?
+
           
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' SpongeBob, you're a great fry cook, but I gave the job to Squidward because being manager is a big responsibility. Well, let's face it, he's more... mature than you.
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' I'm not... mature?
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Okay. I'll see you at the ceremony. (a pink starfish, Patrick Star, comes out of his rock)
           
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Lad, I mean this in the nicest of ways, but there's a word for what you are, and that word is... now, let's see...
+
             
+
'''Fish:''' Dork?
+
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' No, wait, that's not right. Not a dork.
+
'''Patrick Star:''' That sounds like the manager of the new Krusty Krab 2. (notices he doesn't have his shorts on) Oops. Hold on. (rock closes, with Patrick on it. It opens again with Patrick wearing his shorts) Congratulations, buddy.
  
'''Pearl:''' A goofball? (This is, in fact her only line in the movie)
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Oh, thanks, Patrick. And tonight, after my big promotion, we're gonna party 'til we're purple.
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Closer, but no, no, no.
+
'''Patrick:''' I love being purple!
               
+
'''Fish:''' A ding-a-ling.
+
  
'''Fish:''' Wing nut.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' We're going to the place where all the action is.
           
+
'''Old Female Fish:''' A Knucklehead McSpazatron.
+
             
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Okay, that's enough. Look, what I'm trying to say is, you're just a kid. And to be a manager, you have to be a man. Otherwise they'd call it "kid-ager. " You understand-ager? I mean, you understand?
+
           
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I guess so, Mr. Krabs.
+
             
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' SpongeBob?
+
  
(SpongeBob walks away)
+
'''Patrick:''' You don't mean...?
           
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I'm ready. Depression. I'm ready. Depression.
+
             
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Poor kid.
+
  
(Patrick suddenly appears flying on a banner naked with a GO SPONGEBOB flag in his butt.)
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Oh, I mean.
                 
+
'''Patrick:''' Hooray for SpongeBob! Hooray for SpongeBob! Let's hear it for SpongeBob!
+
  
(Patrick accidently hits the stage which sets on fire. Everyone except for Patrick runs away.)
+
'''SpongeBob and Patrick:''' Goofy Goober's Ice Cream Party Boat! (Patrick's rock closes up on them, and opens up a few seconds later. They now have Goofy Goober hats on, and a record begins playing on a record player beside Patrick)
                 
+
'''Patrick:''' Hello? Where'd everybody go? Did I miss something? Did you see my butt?
+
             
+
'''French Narrator:''' Later that evening...
+
  
'''Plankton:''' Time to put Plan Z into effect. Starting at the undersea castle of King Neptune.
+
Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah.
(We see Neptune's castle)
+
You're a Goofy Goober, yeah.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah.
Inside Neptune's Castle 
+
Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah!
                 
+
'''Neptune:''' (He is sitting in his throne by his daughter Mindy, who is sittinng in another throne) Oh, right. The royal court is now in session. Bring the prisoner forward. (Guards do
+
so. He then asks the prisoner a question) So you have confessed to the crime of touching the king's crown?
+
  
'''Prisoner:''' Yes, but...
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (notices his watch and gasps) 8 o'clock? I'm late for work. (runs away) See you later, Patrick!
  
'''Neptune:''' But what?
+
'''Patrick:''' (bounces in on his buttocks) Hey, look for me at the ceremony. I got a little surprise for you. I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah. (bounces away)
  
'''Prisoner:''' But it's my job, Your Highness. I'm the royal crown polisher.
+
===Chapter 4: Plankton Learns of Plan Z===
 +
(bubble-wipe to a large crowd gathered in front of the Krusty Krab. Bikini Bottom News reporter Perch Perkins is on television with his microphone)
  
'''Neptune:''' Well, then I guess I can't execute you. Twenty years in the dungeon it is.
+
'''Perch Perkins:''' Hello, Bikini Bottom! Perch Perkins here, coming to you live in front of the Krusty Krab restaurant, for years the only place to get a delicious and mouthwatering Krabby Patty. Until today, that is. That's right, folks. Longtime owner Mr. Krabs is opening a new restaurant called the Krusty Krab 2. (the crowd applauds) First of all, congratulations, Mr. Krabs. (Krabs has a big grin on his face)
  
'''Mindy:''' Daddy. (Frees the crown polisher) You're free to go.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Hello. I like money.
  
'''Crown Polisher:''' Bless you, Princess Mindy. (Walks away)
+
'''Perch Perkins:''' What inspired you to build a second Krusty Krab right next door to the original?
               
+
'''Neptune:''' Mindy, how dare you defy me.
+
           
+
'''Mindy:''' Why do you have to be so mean?
+
             
+
'''Neptune:''' I am the king. I must enforce the laws of the sea.
+
  
'''Mindy:''' Father, I wish you'd try a little love and compassion instead of these harsh punishments.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Money. (everyone laughs. A jelly bean-shaped creature with one eye, Chum Bucket owner Sheldon J. Plankton, is watching the entire scenario out a periscope-like window of the Chum Bucket)
               
+
'''Presenter:''' That would be nice. (Neptune then bonks him on the head)
+
  
'''Neptune:''' Squire, clear the room. I wish to speak to my daughter alone (Everyone except Neptune and Mindy high tail it. Neptune then shows Mindy his crown). What is this, Mindy?
+
'''Sheldon J. Plankton:''' Curses! It's not fair! Krabs is being interviewed by Perch Perkins, and I've never ha one customer! (the word "customer" is heard echoing in the kitchen. Groans and moans while sweating. His computer wife, Karen, rolls in)
                 
+
'''Mindy:''' Your crown?
+
  
'''Neptune:''' And what does this crown do?
+
'''Karen Plankton:''' ''Don't get worked up again, Plankton, I just mopped the floors.''
  
'''Mindy:''' Covers your bald spot.
+
'''Plankton:''' Oh, Karen, my computer wife, if only I could have managed to steal the secret to Krabs' success, the formula for the Krabby Patty. Then people would line up to eat at my restaurant. Lord knows I've tried. I've exhausted every evil plan in my filing cabinet...from A to Y.
  
'''Neptune:''' It's not bald, it's thinning. This crown does much more than cover a slightly receding hairline. No, this crown entitles the one who wears it to be in charge of the sea.
+
'''Karen:''' ''A to Y?''
One day, you will wear this crown.
+
  
'''Mindy:''' I'm gonna be bald?
+
'''Plankton:''' Yeah, A to Y. You know the alphabet.
  
'''Neptune:''' Thinning! Anyway, the point is, you won't wear it until you learn how to rule
+
'''Karen:''' ''What about Z?''
with an iron fist. Like your father. (He puts what he thinks is his crown on. It is not a crown. It is the cushion that the crown was on) 
+
  
'''Mindy:''' Dad, your "crown"...
+
'''Plankton:''' Z?
  
'''Neptune:''' What the...? (Discovers that his crown is missing) My crown! Someone has stolen
+
'''Karen:''' ''Z. The letter after Y.''
the royal crown!
+
  
'''Plankton:''' (We see him leaving the castle with the crown) I got it. I got it.
+
'''Plankton:''' (searches through his filing cabinet) W, X, Y, Z. (Grabs Plan Z) Plan Z! Here it is, just like you said.
  
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
'''Karen:''' ''Oh, boy.''
Goofy Goober's Ice Cream Party Boat                   
+
  
'''Goofy Goober Clock:''' Hey, all you Goobers, it's time to say howdy to your favorite undersea peanut, Goofy Goober.
+
'''Plankton:''' (looks at Plan Z; suggestively) Oh! Oh! Ohhh! It's evil. It's diabolical. (sniffs the plan) It's lemon-scented. This Plan Z can't possibly fail! (goes outside) So enjoy today, Mr. Krabs, because by tomorrow, I'll have the formula. Then everyone will eat at the Chum Bucket, and I will rule the world! All hail Plankton. All hail Plank...! (SpongeBob runs by and unknowingly crushes Plankton) Ow!
  
'''Kids:''' Howdy, Goofy Goober!
+
===Chapter 5: SpongeBob Encounters Plankton===
 +
'''SpongeBob:''' I'm ready, promotion! I'm ready, promotion!
  
'''Goofy Goober:''' Hey, fellow Goofy Goobers. Time to sing.
+
'''Plankton:''' (he is being stepped on by SpongeBob) Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
             
+
'''Goofy Gobber:''' Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah
+
You're a Goofy Goober, yeah
+
We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah
+
+
'''Goofy Goober and Kids:''' Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah
+
  
(We then see SpongeBob crying at the Peanut Bar)
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (stops running) Eww, I think I stepped in something. (He tries to scrape Plankton off. Plankton yelps as he is being scraped off)
                 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' All right. Get it together, old boy. I know. I'll just stop thinking about it. Hey, you know, I actually feel a little better. I don't even remember why I was sad.
+
  
(Patrick walks up to him) 
+
'''Plankton:''' (muffled) Not in something, on someone, you twit!
                 
+
'''Patrick:''' Hey, it's the new Krusty Krab manager.(SpongeBob crys again) Wow, the pressure's already setting in.
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' No, Pat, you don't understand. I didn't get the promotion.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Oh. Sorry, Plankton. (looks at a smeared Plankton and pulls him off his shoe) Are you on your way to the grand-opening ceremony?
  
'''Patrick:''' What? Why?
+
'''Plankton:''' No, I am not on my way over to the grand-opening ceremony. (mocks SpongeBob's words. Then he jumps four times) I'm busy planning to rule the world! (chuckles)
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Mr. Krabs thinks I'm a kid.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Well, goo luck with that. (runs off) I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion...
  
'''Patrick:''' What? That's insane.
+
'''Plankton:''' (looks at the camera) Stupid kid. (walks back to the Chum Bucket)
  
'''SpongeBob:''' I know.
+
===Chapter 6: The Manager Revealed===
 +
(bubble-wipe to later. Mr. Krabs is at a stand in front of the Krusty Krab 2. The crowd is still gathered there, seated)
  
'''Patrick:''' Well, saying you're a kid, it's like saying I'm a kid. (Waiter walks up to him handing him a Goober Meal)
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Welcome. Welcome, everyone, to the grand opening of the Krusty Krab 2. (the crowd applauds)
  
'''Waiter:''' Here's your Goober Meal, sir.
+
'''Mrs. Poppy Puff:''' We paid $9 for this?
  
'''Patrick:''' I'm supposed to get a toy with this. (Waiter throws one at him) Thanks.
+
'''Sandy Cheeks:''' I paid 10!
  
'''SpongeBob:''' I'm gonna head home, Pat. The celebration's off.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Now, before we begin with the ribbon-cutting, I'd like to announce the name of our new manager.
  
'''Patrick:''' Are you sure?
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (applauding wildly) Yay! Yeah! Ow! Ow, ow! Yeah! Now we're talking! Yeah! Ow! (leans towards Squidward and shushes him) Shh!
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Yeah. I'm not in a Goober mood. (he starts to walk away)
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Yes. Well, anyway, the new manager is a loyal, hard-working employee.
  
'''Patrick:''' Okay, see you.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (thinking) Yes.
  
'''Waiter:''' (Handing Patrick a Triple Gooberberry Sunrise) And here's your Triple Gooberberry Sunrise, sir. (SpongeBob starts to walk back to Patrick)
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' The obvious choice for the job.
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Triple Gooberberry Sunrise, huh? I guess I could use one of those.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (thinking) He's right.
  
'''Patrick:''' Now you're talking. Hey, waiter, we need another one over here.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' A name you all know. It starts with a S.
  
'''Waiter:''' (Handing SpongeBob one) There you go. (SpongeBob and Patrick gleefully eat)
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Please welcome our new manager... Squidward Tentacles! (a banner falls with Squidward's face on it)
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Boy, Pat, that hit the spot. I'm feeling better already.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (excitedly) Yes! Yeah! (dances around, laughing. Then he shakes Squidward's hand) Oh, better luck next time, buddy. Whoo! (cheers as he runs to the stage) Whoo-hoo-hoo! Yeah! All right! Whoo! (grabs the microphone) People of Bikini Bottom, as the manager of...
  
'''Patrick:''' Yeah.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Uh, SpongeBob.
  
'''SpongeBob:''' Waiter, let's get another round over here. (After another eat) Oh, Mr. Waiter. Two more, please. (Then they finish two more) Waiter. (Then two more) Oh, waiter. (Two more) Waiter. (Ignores them) Waiter. Waiter!
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Hold the phone, folks, I'm getting a important news flash from Mr. Krabs. Go ahead, Mr. K. (Mr. Krabs whispers into SpongeBob's ear) I'm making a complete what of myself? (Mr. Krabs whispers again) The most embarrassing thing you've ever seen? (Mr. Krabs whispers a third time) And now it's worse because I'm repeating everything you say into the microphone?
  
'''Waiter:''' Why do I always get the nuts?
+
===Chapter 7: Krabs Reveals the Truth===
 +
'''Mr. Krabs:''' (annoyed) Oh, for crying out loud, SpongeBob! You didn't get the job!
  
'''SpongeBob:''' (Up on stage) All right, folks, this one goes out to my two bestest friends       
+
'''SpongeBob:''' What?
in the whole world: (We see Patrick and the Goofy Goober up on stage, too) Patrick and this big peanut guy. It's a little ditty called..."Waiter!" (All three faint)
+
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
Goofy Goober's Ice Cream Party Boat, the next morning 
+
                 
+
'''Waiter:''' (To SpongeBob) Hey. Hey, get up. Hey, come on, buddy. I wanna go home. Come on, pal.
+
  
'''SpongeBob:''' (After recovering) Oh, my head. (He looks drunk)
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' You... did not... get... the job.
  
'''Waiter:''' Listen to me. It's 8 in the morning. Go scrape up your friend and get going.  
+
'''SpongeBob:''' But... but why?
  
'''SpongeBob:''' My friend? (Sees Patrick lying on the floor. He looks drunk, too) Patrick. Hey, what's up, buddy? (Then realizes something) Wait, you said 8:00. I'm late for work. Mr. Krabs is gonna be...(Disgustedly) Mr. Krabs.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' SpongeBob, you're a great fry cook, but I gave the job to Squidward because being manager is a big responsibility. Well, let's face it, he's more... mature than you.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
+
                 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Now, pay attention, Squidward. As new manager, you've gotta keep a sharp eye out for paying customers. (Looks through a telescope)
+
  
'''Squidward:''' Yawn.
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I'm not... mature?
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' What's this? King Neptune is riding toward The Krusty Krab at lunchtime.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Lad, I mean this in the nicest of ways, but there's a word for what you are, and that word is... now, let's see...
He's got money.
+
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
Outside the Krusty Krab 2
+
 
+
'''Neptune:''' (To Mindy, of course) Stay in the coach, daughter. (Gets out of the coach) This won't take long.
+
  
'''Mindy:''' Daddy, please. I think you're overreacting.
+
'''Lenny:''' Dork?
  
'''Neptune:''' Silence, Mindy. I know what I'm doing. (Turns around to leave, but bumps into a pole) Squire. (The Squire, who was with them in the coach, pops onto the scene)
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' No, wait, that's not right. Not a dork.
  
'''Squire:''' Yes, Your Highness?
+
'''Pearl Krabs:''' A goofball?
  
'''Neptune:''' Have this pole executed at once.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Closer, but no, no, no.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
+
 
+
(Mr. Krabs is changing the price of the Krabby Patty)
+
  
'''Squidward:''' A hundred and one dollars for a Krabby Patty?
+
'''Fred:''' A ding-a-ling.
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' With cheese, Mr. Squidward, with cheese.
+
'''Jimmy:''' Wing nut.
  
(Neptune comes into the Krusty Krab)
+
'''Mable:''' A Knucklehead McSpazatron!
  
'''Neptune:''' (To the customers) Greeting, subjects. I seek the one known as Eugene Krabs. May he present himself to me at once.
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' OK, that's enough! Look, what I'm trying to say is, you're just a kid. And to be a manager, you have to be a man. Otherwise they'd call it "kid-ager." You understand-ager? I mean, you understand?
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' I'm Eugene Krabs, Your Highness. Would you like to order something?
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I guess so, Mr. Krabs. (walks away)
  
'''Neptune:''' Nay! I'm on to you, Krabs! You have stolen the royal crown, you cannot deny. For, clever as you are, you left one damning piece of evidence at the scene of the crime. (Holds up a piece of paper and shows it to Krabs)
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' SpongeBob?
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' I stole your crown. Signed, Eugene Krabs. (Eyes widen)
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (walks off toward a random sunset; depressed) I'm ready. Depression. I'm ready. Depression.
  
'''Neptune:''' Relinquish the royal crown to me at once.
+
===Chapter 8: Patrick's Interruption===
 +
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Poor kid. (Patrick appears flying on a banner naked with a "Go SpongeBob" flag between his buttocks. The flag waves)
  
'''Mr. Krabs:''' But... But this is crazy. I didn't do it.   
+
'''Patrick:''' Hooray for SpongeBob! (laughs) Hooray for SpongeBob! Let's hear it for SpongeBob! (a shot of his butt, with the flag in it, is shown. Mr. Krabs runs off the stage, which Patrick accidentally hits. The banner collapses on the stage, and it is set on fire. The entire crowd runs away while Patrick bursts out of the banner) Hello? Where'd everybody go? Did I miss something? Did you see my butt?
 
+
'''The Phone:''' (Mr. Krabs' voice) Ahoy, this is Eugene Krabs. Leave a message.
+
                 
+
'''Clay:''' Hi, Mr. Krabs. This is Clay, the guy you sold Neptune's crown to. Yeah, I just wanted to say thanks again for selling me the crown. Neptune's crown. I sold it to a guy in Shell City,
+
and I just wanted to say thanks again for selling me the crown. Neptune's crown. Which is now in Shell City. Goodbye.
+
 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Don't you just hate wrong numbers?
+
 
+
'''Neptune:''' My crown is in the forbidden Shell City?!
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
                 
+
'''Plankton:''' Plan Z. I love Plan Z.
+
 
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
                 
+
'''King Neptune:''' Prepare to burn, Krabs.
+
           
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Wait, Neptune. Please, I'm begging you, I ain't a crook. Ask anyone, they'll vouch for me.
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:'''Very well, then. Before I turn this conniving
+
crustacean into fishmeal,who here has anything to say
+
about Eugene Krabs?
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' (SpongeBob looking all drunk) I've got something to say about Mr. Krabs.
+
         
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' SpongeBob, me boy,
+
you've come just in time. Please, tell King Neptune all about me.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I have worked for Mr. Krabs for many years and always though the was a great boss.
+
 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' You see? A great boss.
+
             
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I now realize that he's a great big jerk! I deserve that manager's job! But you didn't give it to me, because you say I'm a kid. Well, I am 100-percent man! And this man has got something to say to you. There, I think I made my point.
+
               
+
''King Neptune:''' Anyone else? No? Well, then. (Fires at Mr. Krabs)
+
 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Me pants are on fire! Me underwear's on fire! I'm on fire!
+
       
+
''King Neptune:''' And now, Eugene Krabs, you will...
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:'''Wait! I'm flattered you would do thison my account, but being manager isn't worth killing Mr. Krabs over.
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' Quiet, fool! Mr. Krabs stole my crown, and now it's in Shell City. That's why he must die.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Does it seem a little harsh to kill someone over a crown?
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' You don't understand. My crown
+
is a symbol of my king-like authority. And between you and me...my hair is thinning a bit.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Oh, Your Highness, I'm sure it's not
+
that notice...bald...bald...
+
 
+
(Everybody keeps on saying: bald...bald...bald)
+
                 
+
'''Fred:''' My eyes!
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:'''All right, all right.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' King Neptune, sir? Would you spare Mr. Krabs' life if I went to get your crown back?
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' You, go to Shell City? No one who's gone to Shell City
+
has ever returned. What makes you think you could? You're just a kid.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:'''But I'm not a kid. I can do it.
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' Run along, I have a crab to cook.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' No! I won't let you.
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' Very well, then. I'll have to fry you both.
+
   
+
'''Mindy:''' Daddy, stop it. Can't you get through one day
+
without executing someone?
+
     
+
'''King Neptune:''' Mindy. I told you
+
to stay in the carriage.
+
   
+
'''Mindy:''' Where's your love and compassion? (Holds SpongeBob) Look at this little guy. He's willing to risk his life to find your crown and save his boss.
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' But, daughter, I...
+
 
+
'''Mindy:''' Please, Father? At least let him try. What have you got to lose? Might I remind you of your special problem?
+
             
+
(Everybody keeps on saying: bald...bald...bald)
+
 
+
''Fred:''' My eyes!
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' All right. Very well, Mindy. I'll give him a chance. But when your little champion fails to return, I get to splatter this crab
+
all over the walls. And as for you, be back here with my crown in exactly ten days.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:'''He can do it in nine!
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' Eight!
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Seven!
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' Six!...(SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs stopped Patrick from talking) Six it is, then.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Fi---ve...(quietly)
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick, shhh...         
+
     
+
'''King Neptune:''' Until then, the crab shall remain frozen where he now stands.
+
 
+
'''Mr. Krabs:''' No, wait. I'm begging you.
+
       
+
'''Squidward:''' Who turned on the AC? Mr. Krabs! Oh, no, this is terrible. Who's gonna sign my paycheck?
+
 
+
'''King Neptune:''' Come along, Mindy.
+
 
+
'''Mindy:''' Listen, you guys, the road
+
to Shell City is really dangerous.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' She's purty, SpongeBob. (While Mindy is explaining, Patrick is staring at her)
+
 
+
'''Mindy:''' There's crooks, killers and monsters everywhere. And what's worse, there's a giant Cyclops who guards the outskirts of the city and preys on innocent sea creatures. Don't let him catch you, because if he does, he'll take you back to his lair, and you'll never be seen again. Here, take this.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' What's in here? (Opens bag and wind was released)
+
 
+
'''Mindy:''' It's a magical bag of winds. I stole them from my father.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' (To Mindy) You're hot.
+
 
+
'''Mindy:''' Once you find the crown, open the bag of winds and you'll be blown back home.
+
 
+
'''Neptune:''' Mindy!
+
 
+
'''Mindy:''' I'm coming. Good luck, SpongeBob.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Wait. How did you know my name?
+
 
+
'''Mindy:''' Oh, I'm gonna be queen of the sea one day. I've learned the names of all the sea creatures.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' What's my name?
+
 
+
'''Mindy:''' That's easy. You're Patrick Star. (Patrick blushes from head to toe)
+
 
+
'''Neptune:''' Mindy! I gotta go. I believe in you guys.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Thanks, Mindy. (Now to Mr. Krabs) Don't worry, Mr. Krabs. Patrick, Squidward and I...
+
 
+
'''Squidward:''' Pass. (He walks out the door, and leaves his hat behind)
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick and I...
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Hi.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' ....are gonna get that crown back and save you from Neptune's wrath. You've got nothing to worry about. Your life is in our hands. (Mr. Krabs turns his eyes and looks at them. They are drooling, and look very stupid) Patrick, let's go get that crown.
+
 
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
Inside SpongeBob's House
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Feast your eyes, Patrick.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' What is it?
+
   
+
'''SpongeBob:'''The Patty Wagon. Mr. Krabs uses it for promotional reasons. Let me show you some of its features. Sesame-seed finish, steel-belted pickles, grilled-leather interior. And under the hood, a fuel-injected french-fryer
+
with dual overhead grease traps.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Wow!
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Yeah, wow!
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Hey, I thought you didn't have
+
a driver's license.
+
   
+
'''SpongeBob: '''You don't need a license
+
to drive a sandwich.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob and Patrick:''' Shell City, here we come!
+
 
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
+
 
+
'''Plankton:''' Ding-a-ling. Hey there, old buddy. Freeze. One secret formula to go, please. No, no, don't trouble yourself. I'll get it. Well, I'd like to hang around,
+
but I've got Krabby Patties to make...over at the Chum Bucket. Plan Z, I love you. (Mr. Krabs tear fell)
+
 
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
                 
+
'''SpongeBob and Patrick:''' Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah
+
You're a Goofy Goober, yeah
+
We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah
+
Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Fill her up, please.
+
 
+
'''Fish:''' What'll it be, fellas,
+
mustard or ketchup?
+
       
+
'''Patrick:''' Are they laughing at us?
+
   
+
'''SpongeBob:''' No, Patrick, they're laughing next to us.
+
 
+
'''Fish:''' Where you two dumb kids headed, anyway?
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Kids? For your information,
+
we are not kids, we are men. And we're off to get King Neptune's crown in Shell City.
+
 
+
'''Fish:''' Shell City? Ain't that the place that's guarded
+
by a killer Cyclops?
+
     
+
'''SpongeBob'''That's right.
+
     
+
'''Fish:''' Lloyd, take off your hat in respect. Respect for the dead! You two dipsticks ain't gonna last ten seconds over the county line.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Oh, yeah? We'll see about that.
+
 
+
'''Car Stealer:''' Out of the car, fellas.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' How many seconds was that?
+
 
+
'''Fish:''' Twelve.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' In your face. That's what I'm talking about. Yeah! Who's the kid now?
+
   
+
'''Fish:''' They're dead.
+
 
+
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
At the Chumb Bucket:
+
           
+
'''Perch Perkins:''' Perch Perkins here with an incredible news flash. Plankton is selling Krabby Patties at the Chum Bucket. How is this possible? Let's find out.
+
 
+
'''Plankton:''' Step right up. Plenty for everybody.
+
 
+
'''Perch Perkins:''' Excuse me, Plankton. Perch Perkins, Bikini Bottom News. Can I get a minute?
+
 
+
'''Plankton:''' Anything for you, Perch.
+
 
+
'''Perch Perkins:''' All of Bikini Bottom wants to know,
+
how did you get the Krabby Patty?
+
 
+
'''Plankton:''' Well, Perch, before my dear friend
+
Eugene Krabs was frozen by King Neptune...I'm sorry. He confided in me a secret wish. "Sell the Krabby Patty in my absence at the Chum Bucket," he said. "Don't let the flame die out. "By the way, act now and you get a free Chum Bucket bucket helmet with every purchase. Here you go, Perch.
+
 
+
'''Perch Perkins:''' Thanks.
+
 
+
'''Plankton:''' Bucket helmets for everyone!
+
 
+
(Yehey!)
+
 
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
                 
+
'''Plankton:''' Karen, baby, I haven't felt this giddy since the day you agreed
+
to be my wife.
+
 
+
'''Karen:''' I never agreed.
+
     
+
'''Plankton:''' Evil Plan Z is working perfectly. Nothing can stop me now.
+
 
+
'''Karen:''' Nothing except SpongeBob and his pink friend. My sensors indicate that they're going after the crown. If they make it back, Neptune might discover some fingerprints. Tiny fingerprints. Stubby, tiny fingerprints. (Plankton looks at his hands)
+
 
+
'''Plankton:''' Evil Plan Z is way ahead of you, baby. I've already hired someone
+
to take care of those two. He's a vicious, cold-blooded predator. Sesame seed.
+
 
+
 
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
                 
+
'''Patrick:''' Going on.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Yeah! Moving on. Just keep going.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Yup.
+
   
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Gonna get that crown.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Oh, yeah. All right.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Yeah. Victory.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Are we there yet?
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' We must be close by now. Patrick, look. We're doing great! Shell City's only five days away.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' By car.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I wish we still had our car.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' SpongeBob, look.
+
   
+
'''SpongeBob and Patrick:''' Our car!
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' The key.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Where do you think it is?
+
   
+
'''SpongeBob:''' There it is, Pat. The key! Now, how are we gonna get it?
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' I know. Walk in and ask him for it. What are you looking at?
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick, that's a terrible idea.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Sorry.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I know. I'll go in and create a distraction, and you get the key.
+
 
+
'''Patrick:''' Wait. I wanna do the distraction.
+
   
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Okay. I guess it really doesn't matter who does the distraction.
+
 
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
Inside the Thug Tug
+
                 
+
'''Patrick:''' Can I have everybody's attention? (Everybody come closer to Patrick) I have to use the bathroom.
+
 
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:''' It's right over there. (Spots SpongeBob)
+
   
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Stupid contacts. Oh, there it is.
+
I better go wash it off.
+
 
+
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
+
Inside the Bathroom
+
         
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Patrick. You call that a distraction?
+
 
+
'''Patrick:'''Well, I had to go to the bathroom.
+
       
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Well, I got my hands dirty
+
for nothing. (SpongeBob pushes the soap dispenser and bubbles came out.) Patrick, check it out.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob and Patrick:''' Hooray! Bubble party!
+
 
+
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
Inside the Thug Tug
+
             
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:''' Hey! Who blew this bubble? You all know the rules!
+
           
+
'''Everybody in the Thug Tug:''' All bubble-blowing babies
+
will be beaten senseless by every able-bodied patron in the bar.
+
 
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:''' That's right! So who blew it? So nobody knows.
+
 
+
'''Tough Guy #1:''' Maybe it was...
+
 
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:'''Shut up! Somebody in here ain't a real man. You! We're on a baby hunt. And don't think we don't know how to weed them out. Now, everybody line up. DJ, time for the test. No baby can resist singing along to this.
+
     
+
'''Patrick:'''SpongeBob, it's the Goofy Goober theme song.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' I know. (SpongeBob and Patrick tries to resist to sing along)
+
 
+
'''Goofy Goober (On Record):''' Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah               
+
You're a Goofy Goober, yeah               
+
We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah
+
Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah
+
 
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:''' It was you! You're the baby!
+
 
+
'''Tough Guy #2:'''No, no! I only coughed, I swear.
+
 
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:''' DJ! Turn it up louder!
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Don't sing along, Patrick.
+
 
+
'''Patrick: '''I'm trying. Trying so hard.
+
 
+
 
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:''' I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah
+
You're a Goofy Goober, yeah               
+
We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah
+
 
+
'''Double Headed Twins #1:''' Goofy, goofy, goober, goobers, yeah
+
 
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:'''Well, well, well. Which one of you babies was it?
+
     
+
'''Double Headed Twins #1 and #2:'''It was him. He did it. I've never even eaten at...Goofy, goofy, goober, goobers, yeah
+
 
+
'''Thug Tug Owner:''' Well, looks like we got ourselves a double baby.
+
 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' Man, that was a close call.
+
     
+
'''Patrick:''' Guess what I got.
+
                 
+
'''SpongeBob:''' The key!
+
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
Outside of Squidward's House 
+
 
+
'''Squidward:''' (Sticks his head out the window) Too bad SpongeBob's not here to enjoy SpongeBob not being here. (He sticks his head back in, gets his bicycle, and begins riding it around town)
+
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
+
Town
+
 
+
'''Fish:''' Morning. (Squidward notices he is wearing a Chum Bucket helmet)
+
 
+
'''Squidward:''' Some people have no taste in headgear. (Looks around more and sees everyone with a helmet, even a baby) Babies too? (Rides over to a female fish in a boat, waiting for the light to change) Excuse me, miss, but where is everybody getting that horrid headwear?
+
 
+
'''Female Fish:''' (She looks around) Who said that?
+
 
+
'''Squidward:''' Down here.
+
 
+
'''Female Fish:''' (After she finds Squidward) Well, I got it at the Chum Bucket. Plankton's giving them away free
+
with every Krabby Patty.
+
 
+
'''Squidward:''' Chum Bucket? Free? Krabby Patty? Plankton? Giving? With?
+
  
 +
{{Movie/Parts}}
 +
{{Movie/Ver. 2}}
 
[[Category:Transcript]]
 
[[Category:Transcript]]
[[Category:The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie]]
 
 
{{Movie}}
 
{{Slogan}}
 

Latest revision as of 23:54, 13 October 2024

Contents

[edit] Dialogue

[edit] Chapter 1: Opening (Real film sequence)

(the movie starts with the 2002 Paramount Pictures logo and a Nickelodeon Movies logo made for the film. A sky fades in with seagulls flying across while the titles "Paramount Pictures Presents," "A Nickelodeon Movies Production," and "in association with United Plankton Pictures" appear. Then a pirate on a look-out post is shown. He looks upwards to get a better look at something with his telescope. The screen then shows the view of the telescope, with a pirate on a dinghy shown)

Pirate #1: (with a trunk) I got it! I got it! I got it!

Pirate #2: (squints) Dinghy ahoy. (looks down to tell another pirate something) Dinghy off the port bow. Dinghy off the port bow!

Pirate #3: Dinghy off the port bow!

Pirates: (offscreen) Dinghy off the port bow!

Pirate #4: Captain, dinghy off the... (he is slammed in the face by a door as the captain walks on deck)

Captain: Dinghy. (lets the pirate in the dinghy onto the ship, along with the trunk)

Pirate #1: I got it! I got it.

Captain: Where is it?

Pirate #2: It's right here, captain.

Captain: (opens the trunk) I never thought I'd see it with me own eye. (excitedly) Tickets to the SpongeBob movie! (the pirates cheer and they sail to the movie theater, singing the SpongeBob SquarePants theme song)

Pirates: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?
SpongeBob SquarePants.
Absorbent and yellow and porous is he?
SpongeBob SquarePants.
If nautical nonsense be something you wish?
SpongeBob SquarePants.
Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish?
SpongeBob SquarePants.
SpongeBob SquarePants.
SpongeBob SquarePants.
Sponge-Bob Square-Pants.
SpongeBob SquarePants.
SpongeBob SquarePants.
Sponge-Bob Square-Pants.
SpongeBob SquarePants.
SpongeBob SquarePants.
Sponge-Bob Square-Pants!

(the pirates hog the snack bar and get some popcorn. They rush into the theater room, where the movie starts)

[edit] Chapter 2: SpongeBob's Dream

French Narrator: (the film starts out on the familiar Bikini Atoll island) Ah, the sea. So mysterious, so beautiful. So... uhh... wet. (the camera pans down into Bikini Bottom and stops in front of the Krusty Krab) Our story begins in Bikini Bottom's popular undersea eatery, the Krusty Krab restaurant, where... (a policefish appears)

Police: Back off! Back off! (waves arms to back off at reporters/citizens)

French Narrator: Hey, wait a minute. What is happening?

(the camera zooms out to show the Krusty Krab is surrounded by cops. The camera then pans to the left to reveal a red crab, Krusty Krab owner Eugene H. Krabs)

Eugene H. Krabs: Please settle down... (referring to the Krusty Krab) We've got a situation in there! I'd rather not discuss 'til me manager gets here!

Female Fish: (offscreen) Look, there he is!

(a black, boat-shaped limousine with orange flames drives up. A yellow leg, which is wearing a black boot with an orange snake in the shape of an "S" on it, steps out of the limo when it is stopped. As the camera pans up, a yellow sponge, SpongeBob SquarePants, climbs out of the limo. He walks toward the Krusty Krab and blows a bubble)

SpongeBob SquarePants: Talk to me, Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: Oh, it started out as a simple order: a Krabby Patty with cheese. When the customer took a bite, no cheese! (cries, but SpongeBob slaps him)

SpongeBob: Get a hold of yourself, Eugene. I'm going in. (walks in and sees a fish, extremely nervous, looking at his Krabby Patty) Take it easy, friend. I'm the manager of this establishment. (puts a briefcase down on a table) Everything's gonna be just fine.

Customer: I'm really scared here, man...

SpongeBob: (opens the briefcase) You got a name?

Customer: (nervously) Phil.

SpongeBob: (puts on gloves) You got a family, Phil? (Phil chokes over his words, unable to speak. Snaps his fingers) Come on, Phil, stay with me. Let's hear about that family.

Phil: I got a wife and two beautiful children.

SpongeBob: (puts on a headset from the briefcase) That's what it's all about. I want you to do me a favor, Phil.

Phil: What?

SpongeBob: (picks a slice of cheese out from his briefcase with some tweezers) Say "cheese." (dramatically and slowly attempts to put the cheese on the Krabby Patty. Kicks the door open, Phil in his arms. The crowd gasps. The cheese on the Krabby Patty sparkles) Order up.

Crowd: (they cheer and lift SpongeBob up on their shoulders) Three cheers for the manager! Hip! Hip! (SpongeBob's alarm clock honks) Hip! Hip! (SpongeBob's alarm clock honks again) Hip! Hip! (SpongeBob's alarm clock honks a third time)

[edit] Chapter 3: SpongeBob Prepares for the Ceremony

(honk continues from dream; the screen now shows SpongeBob in his bedroom. He turns off his honking foghorn alarm clock)

SpongeBob: Hooray! Gary, I had that dream again! And it's finally going to come true! (runs over to his calendar) Today! Sorry about this calendar. (tears off the calendar page for the day before to reveal "March 7." On the page, it has a picture of the Krusty Krab 2 with rainbows and hearts around it) Because today is the grand-opening ceremony for the Krusty Krab 2, where Mr. Krabs will announce the new manager.

Gary the Snail: Meow.

SpongeBob: Who's it gonna be, Gary? (chuckles to himself) Well, let's ask my wall of 374 consecutive employee-of-the-month awards. (the camera pulls up, revealing many "employee of the month" portraits)

SpongeBob Employee of the Month Awards: SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob: I'm ready. Promotion. (goes into a walk-in shower, eats soap, inserts a hose in his head, and puffs up until soap comes out. Pulls out paper-like fabric, which he folds into his pants. the back springs off, revealing his rear, which he covers up. Blushes and walks off-screen sideways. Brushes his eyes with toothpaste and wipes off the foam) Cleanliness is next to manager-liness. (goes outside and runs around in circles) I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion. (the camera slowly zooms in on a house shaped liked an moai head, and the scene fades to a turquoise octopus, Squidward Tentacles, taking a shower)

Squidward Tentacles: La da dee, la da doo, la da dum, La da dee, la da doo, la da dum...
Squidward and SpongeBob: (in unison) La da dee, la da doo, la da dum, La da d...

Squidward: Huh?

SpongeBob: ...ee, la da doo, la da dum, Bum bum bum, Da da da...

Squidward: (interrupts SpongeBob and covers himself) SpongeBob! What are you doing in here?!

SpongeBob: I have to tell you something, Squidward.

Squidward: Whatever it is, can't it wait until we get to work?

SpongeBob: There's no shower at work.

Squidward: What do you want?!

SpongeBob: I just wanted to say I'll be thanking you in my managerial acceptance speech today.

Squidward: GET OUT! (kicks SpongeBob out the window)

SpongeBob: Okay. I'll see you at the ceremony. (a pink starfish, Patrick Star, comes out of his rock)

Patrick Star: That sounds like the manager of the new Krusty Krab 2. (notices he doesn't have his shorts on) Oops. Hold on. (rock closes, with Patrick on it. It opens again with Patrick wearing his shorts) Congratulations, buddy.

SpongeBob: Oh, thanks, Patrick. And tonight, after my big promotion, we're gonna party 'til we're purple.

Patrick: I love being purple!

SpongeBob: We're going to the place where all the action is.

Patrick: You don't mean...?

SpongeBob: Oh, I mean.

SpongeBob and Patrick: Goofy Goober's Ice Cream Party Boat! (Patrick's rock closes up on them, and opens up a few seconds later. They now have Goofy Goober hats on, and a record begins playing on a record player beside Patrick)

Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah.
You're a Goofy Goober, yeah.
We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah.
Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah!

SpongeBob: (notices his watch and gasps) 8 o'clock? I'm late for work. (runs away) See you later, Patrick!

Patrick: (bounces in on his buttocks) Hey, look for me at the ceremony. I got a little surprise for you. I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah. (bounces away)

[edit] Chapter 4: Plankton Learns of Plan Z

(bubble-wipe to a large crowd gathered in front of the Krusty Krab. Bikini Bottom News reporter Perch Perkins is on television with his microphone)

Perch Perkins: Hello, Bikini Bottom! Perch Perkins here, coming to you live in front of the Krusty Krab restaurant, for years the only place to get a delicious and mouthwatering Krabby Patty. Until today, that is. That's right, folks. Longtime owner Mr. Krabs is opening a new restaurant called the Krusty Krab 2. (the crowd applauds) First of all, congratulations, Mr. Krabs. (Krabs has a big grin on his face)

Mr. Krabs: Hello. I like money.

Perch Perkins: What inspired you to build a second Krusty Krab right next door to the original?

Mr. Krabs: Money. (everyone laughs. A jelly bean-shaped creature with one eye, Chum Bucket owner Sheldon J. Plankton, is watching the entire scenario out a periscope-like window of the Chum Bucket)

Sheldon J. Plankton: Curses! It's not fair! Krabs is being interviewed by Perch Perkins, and I've never ha one customer! (the word "customer" is heard echoing in the kitchen. Groans and moans while sweating. His computer wife, Karen, rolls in)

Karen Plankton: Don't get worked up again, Plankton, I just mopped the floors.

Plankton: Oh, Karen, my computer wife, if only I could have managed to steal the secret to Krabs' success, the formula for the Krabby Patty. Then people would line up to eat at my restaurant. Lord knows I've tried. I've exhausted every evil plan in my filing cabinet...from A to Y.

Karen: A to Y?

Plankton: Yeah, A to Y. You know the alphabet.

Karen: What about Z?

Plankton: Z?

Karen: Z. The letter after Y.

Plankton: (searches through his filing cabinet) W, X, Y, Z. (Grabs Plan Z) Plan Z! Here it is, just like you said.

Karen: Oh, boy.

Plankton: (looks at Plan Z; suggestively) Oh! Oh! Ohhh! It's evil. It's diabolical. (sniffs the plan) It's lemon-scented. This Plan Z can't possibly fail! (goes outside) So enjoy today, Mr. Krabs, because by tomorrow, I'll have the formula. Then everyone will eat at the Chum Bucket, and I will rule the world! All hail Plankton. All hail Plank...! (SpongeBob runs by and unknowingly crushes Plankton) Ow!

[edit] Chapter 5: SpongeBob Encounters Plankton

SpongeBob: I'm ready, promotion! I'm ready, promotion!

Plankton: (he is being stepped on by SpongeBob) Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

SpongeBob: (stops running) Eww, I think I stepped in something. (He tries to scrape Plankton off. Plankton yelps as he is being scraped off)

Plankton: (muffled) Not in something, on someone, you twit!

SpongeBob: Oh. Sorry, Plankton. (looks at a smeared Plankton and pulls him off his shoe) Are you on your way to the grand-opening ceremony?

Plankton: No, I am not on my way over to the grand-opening ceremony. (mocks SpongeBob's words. Then he jumps four times) I'm busy planning to rule the world! (chuckles)

SpongeBob: Well, goo luck with that. (runs off) I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion...

Plankton: (looks at the camera) Stupid kid. (walks back to the Chum Bucket)

[edit] Chapter 6: The Manager Revealed

(bubble-wipe to later. Mr. Krabs is at a stand in front of the Krusty Krab 2. The crowd is still gathered there, seated)

Mr. Krabs: Welcome. Welcome, everyone, to the grand opening of the Krusty Krab 2. (the crowd applauds)

Mrs. Poppy Puff: We paid $9 for this?

Sandy Cheeks: I paid 10!

Mr. Krabs: Now, before we begin with the ribbon-cutting, I'd like to announce the name of our new manager.

SpongeBob: (applauding wildly) Yay! Yeah! Ow! Ow, ow! Yeah! Now we're talking! Yeah! Ow! (leans towards Squidward and shushes him) Shh!

Mr. Krabs: Yes. Well, anyway, the new manager is a loyal, hard-working employee.

SpongeBob: (thinking) Yes.

Mr. Krabs: The obvious choice for the job.

SpongeBob: (thinking) He's right.

Mr. Krabs: A name you all know. It starts with a S.

Mr. Krabs: Please welcome our new manager... Squidward Tentacles! (a banner falls with Squidward's face on it)

SpongeBob: (excitedly) Yes! Yeah! (dances around, laughing. Then he shakes Squidward's hand) Oh, better luck next time, buddy. Whoo! (cheers as he runs to the stage) Whoo-hoo-hoo! Yeah! All right! Whoo! (grabs the microphone) People of Bikini Bottom, as the manager of...

Mr. Krabs: Uh, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: Hold the phone, folks, I'm getting a important news flash from Mr. Krabs. Go ahead, Mr. K. (Mr. Krabs whispers into SpongeBob's ear) I'm making a complete what of myself? (Mr. Krabs whispers again) The most embarrassing thing you've ever seen? (Mr. Krabs whispers a third time) And now it's worse because I'm repeating everything you say into the microphone?

[edit] Chapter 7: Krabs Reveals the Truth

Mr. Krabs: (annoyed) Oh, for crying out loud, SpongeBob! You didn't get the job!

SpongeBob: What?

Mr. Krabs: You... did not... get... the job.

SpongeBob: But... but why?

Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, you're a great fry cook, but I gave the job to Squidward because being manager is a big responsibility. Well, let's face it, he's more... mature than you.

SpongeBob: I'm not... mature?

Mr. Krabs: Lad, I mean this in the nicest of ways, but there's a word for what you are, and that word is... now, let's see...

Lenny: Dork?

Mr. Krabs: No, wait, that's not right. Not a dork.

Pearl Krabs: A goofball?

Mr. Krabs: Closer, but no, no, no.

Fred: A ding-a-ling.

Jimmy: Wing nut.

Mable: A Knucklehead McSpazatron!

Mr. Krabs: OK, that's enough! Look, what I'm trying to say is, you're just a kid. And to be a manager, you have to be a man. Otherwise they'd call it "kid-ager." You understand-ager? I mean, you understand?

SpongeBob: I guess so, Mr. Krabs. (walks away)

Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob?

SpongeBob: (walks off toward a random sunset; depressed) I'm ready. Depression. I'm ready. Depression.

[edit] Chapter 8: Patrick's Interruption

Mr. Krabs: Poor kid. (Patrick appears flying on a banner naked with a "Go SpongeBob" flag between his buttocks. The flag waves)

Patrick: Hooray for SpongeBob! (laughs) Hooray for SpongeBob! Let's hear it for SpongeBob! (a shot of his butt, with the flag in it, is shown. Mr. Krabs runs off the stage, which Patrick accidentally hits. The banner collapses on the stage, and it is set on fire. The entire crowd runs away while Patrick bursts out of the banner) Hello? Where'd everybody go? Did I miss something? Did you see my butt?

The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie

Characters: David HasselhoffDennisCyclopsGoofy GooberKarenKing NeptuneEugene H. KrabsPatrick StarMindySheldon J. PlanktonSpongeBob SquarePantsGas Station AttendantsCar StealerThe Pirates
Locations: Krusty Krab 2PlanktopolisShell CityGoofy Goober's Ice Cream Party BoatThug Tug
Songs: Now That We're MenGoofy Goober RockThe Best Day EverThe Goofy Goober SongUnder My RockYou Better SwimJust a KidSpongeBob and Patrick Confront the Psychic Wall of Energy
Video Games: SpongeBob SquarePants: The Movie

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