Episode Transcript: Pressure

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Squirrel Jokes The Smoking Peanut

Episode Article: Pressure

Characters

Dialogue

SpongeBob: Ha, looking at the clouds. They're beatiful.

Sandy: Yeah!

SpongeBob: That one looks like a flower.

Sandy: They all look like flowers, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: Yeah.

Sandy: You know, normally I'd race you to the top of that mountain, but who would want to do that.

SpongeBob: Yeah!

Sandy: And, we'd all know who would get to the top first.

SpongeBob and Sandy: Yeah. Me.

SpongeBob: Very funny, Sandy. I thought you said you could beat me at the top of that mountain.

Sandy: Well, I'd say I'm already halfway there. (SpongeBob begins to climb the mountain, unleashes rocks at him)

SpongeBob: Hey! You did that on purpose.

Sandy: That was an accident. This was on purpose! (throws more rocks at him) I hope you didn't forget your umbrella.

SpongeBob: (holds on to an umbrella and floats up).

SpongeBob: Sentence enhancers?

Sandy: Well. It's about time you got here.

SpongeBob: Ooh. I bet you can't beat me to the Krusty Krab

Sandy: There is no way a sea creature is gonna beat me at running.

SpongeBob: Well I'd say I'm already halfway there...halfway there (zoom out to reveal a busted record repeating "halfway there")

SpongeBob: (laughing, hits a brick wall, Sandy jumps on his sponge body).

Sandy: See? I told you y'all can't...

SpongeBob: (dressed as an old man) Well! Keeping an old man waiting with your land creature... (rips off suit, laughing)

Patrick: (comes along)

Squidward: What's all the laughing!

Patrick: She says land creatures are better.

Sandy: Ok, you sea creatures got the upper hand in swimming. But we land creatures are way better than y'all sea creatures.

Patrick: At what?

Sandy: Oh, at darn everything I guess. Horse riding and cow roping and...

Mr. Krabs: (comes along and Sandy finishes)

SpongeBob: I'll admit. You got some pretty good moves, for a squirrel.

Patrick: I bet they can't eat a Krabby Double Deluxe in one bite. (gulps a patty down) Ah.

Sandy: Give me that. They don't call me Cheeks for nothing. (tries to eat it, but her air helmet blocks it. Everyone else begins to laugh)

Patrick: Thank you, thank you.

Sandy: Well, there's just one thing.

Mr. Krabs: Can you do this? (his eyeballs go into his head) Everyone in my family can do that.

Sandy: Uh...uh...

Squidward: How about this? (balances six spinning plates on a stick with his tentacles) Huh?

SpongeBob: Can you reproduce by budding. (begins to do it) Can ya? Can ya? Can ya? Can ya?

Sandy: No!

SpongeBob: Most importantly...can you do this? (All except Sandy begin gasping three times without releasing any breath)

Sandy: Well, what would I wanna do any of that dumb stuff for anyway?

SpongeBob: Admit it, Sandy, you can't do anything a sea creatures can do. In fact, if wasn't for that suit, you couldn't live down here!

Sandy: Well, you know... (all continue laughing) I don't need to... (all laughing harder) Grr... I'll show ya all! I don't need this air suit! (takes off suit, and all gasp)

Sandy: And I don't need this helmet neither! (throws helmet to ground)

Mr. Krabs: Neptune preserve her!

Squidward: How long can she stay like that?

SpongeBob: I don't know!

Patrick: Sandy's a girl?

SpongeBob: Wow Sandy. I guess I was wrong. Land creatures really are best. At least until they have to breathe... (Sandy winks) Feelin' light-headed yet? (Sandy shakes her head) Remember this? (SpongeBob takes a deep breath in and out)

Mr. Krabs: It's free! (Mr. Krabs takes a deep breath too)

Sandy: (starts suffocating underwater, then she puts her head into a pickle jar.)

Mr. Krabs: I knew it! There was no way some "airhead" was gonna win anything against a water breather!

Patrick: Airhead... (laughs. The top of his head deflates like a balloon) Huh? (puts thumb in mouth and blows. His head becomes round at the top.)

Sandy: All right already? You've had your turn, flopping around and swimming with your fancy fins and gills such. But there's no way you can last even a minute in my turf.

Squidward: Do we need pickle jars? (all begin to laugh)

Sandy: (leads them all to a hill) Well?

Mr. Krabs: Well, um... we're late.

Squidward: Ya, late. We're all late for...

Patrick: A fitting!

Sandy: Fit what? Your chicken costumes!

Patrick: (holding popcorn) We are not chickens! (drops popcorn) Huh! My popcorn (begins pecking on it like a chicken)

Sandy: Tell you what. You stay one minute there. And I'll admit it.

SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidward and Mr. Krabs: We're ready! (Patrick, Mr. Krabs and Squidward go at the back of SpongeBob, making him the first.)

SpongeBob: Well, here I go.

Mr. Krabs: Wait, SpongeBob! (gives him a glass)

SpongeBob: Thanks, Mr. Krabs (drinks from it) Here I go! Hey, it isn't so bad here.

Patrick: Well, I'll do this quick. Cannonball!

Mr. Krabs: (goes up)

SpongeBob: Yeah, Mr. Krabs!

SpongeBob, Patrick and Mr. Krabs: Squidward! Squidward! Squidward!

Squidward: Well, ok. (goes up) What? It isn't so bad? I could last 2 minutes here.

SpongeBob: (approached birds) Hey, a resident. Hi, we're from underwater. Do you know Sandy Cheeks?

Sandy: 5,4,3,2,1. Wow. They made it. Better congratulate them. (goes up, discovers the birds attacking them, attacks the birds) Hey! You can't eat my friends like that!

(back underwater)

SpongeBob: Wow, Sandy! Thanks for saving our butts back there.

Mr. Krabs: Free cheers for land creatures and sea creatures! Hep hep!

SpongeBob, Sandy, Patrick, Squidward and Mr. Krabs: Hooray!

Mr. Krabs: Hep hep!

SpongeBob, Sandy, Patrick, Squidward and Mr. Krabs: Hooray!

Mr. Krabs: Hep hep!

Seagulls: Hooray.


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