Transcript: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie/Part 1

Dialogue

Chapter 1: Opening (Real film sequence)

(The movie starts as the camera zooms to the stars title card: Paramount Pictures logo and Nickelodeon Movies logo)

• Pirate #1: [with a trunk] I got it! I got it! I got it!

• Pirate #2: Dinghy ahoy.

• Pirate #3: Dinghy off the port bow. Dinghy off the port bow! Dinghy off the port bow! Dinghy off the port bow. Captain, dinghy off the... [He is slammed in the face by a door as the captain walks on deck]

• Captain: Dinghy. [Lets Pirate #1 onto the ship, along with the trunk]

• Pirate #1: I got it! I got it.

• Captain: Where is it?

• Pirate #2: It's right here, captain. [Opens the trunk]

• Captain: I never thought I'd see it with me own eye. Tickets to The SpongeBob Movie! [The pirates cheer and they sail to the movie theater, singing the SpongeBob SquarePants theme song]

• Pirates: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob SquarePants.(pirates keep signing the SpongeBob SquarePants theme song as the title card says: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie) Absorbent and yellow and porous is he? SpongeBob SquarePants. If nautical nonsense be something you wish? SpongeBob SquarePants. Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish? SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants.SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePa-nts! [The pirates hog the snack bar and get some popcorn. They rush into the theater room, where the movie starts]

Chapter 2: SpongeBob's dream

French Narrator: Ah,the sea. So mysterious, so beautiful. So... wet. Our story begins in Bikini Bottom's popular undersea eatery - the Krusty Krab restaurant, where...

(The camera pans down into Bikini Bottom in front of the Krusty Krab)

Police: Back up! Back up! (waves arms to back up at reporters/citizens)

Narator: Hey, wait a minute, What is happening?

Mr. Krabs: Please settle down. (Referring to the Krusty Krab) We've got a situation in there. I'd rather not discuss till me manager gets here.

Fish: Look, there he is. (A limousine drives up, SpongeBob climbs out of the limousine. He walks toward the Krusty Krab.)

SpongeBob: Talk to me, Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: It started out as a simple order: a Krabby Patty with cheese. When the customer took a bite, no cheese! (he cries, but SpongeBob slaps him)

SpongeBob: Get a hold of yourself, Eugene. I'm going in. (goes into the Krusty Krab)

SpongeBob: Take it easy, friend. I'm the manager of this establishment. Everything's gonna be just fine.

Phil: I'm really scared here, man.

SpongeBob: You got a name?

Phil: Phil.

SpongeBob: You got a family, Phil? (Phil begins to cry) Come on, Phil, stay with me. Let's hear about that family.

Phil: I got a wife and two beautiful children.

SpongeBob: That's what it's all about. I want you to do me a favor, Phil.

Phil: What?

SpongeBob: Say cheese. (SpongeBob carefully lifts the bun and Dramatically puts some cheese under. He then comes out of the Krusty Krab with Phil in his arms) Order up.

All(But SpongeBob): Three cheers for the manager! Hip! Hip!(Honk!) Hip! Hip!(Honk!) Hip! Hip! (Honk!!!!)

Chapter 3: Let Them Have It!

(Continues from dream) SpongeBob: Hooray!!! Gary, I had that dream again. And it's finally gonna come true. Today. Sorry about this, calendar. (Rips calendar page off, reviling the KK2 page.) Because today is the grand-opening ceremony for The Krusty Krab 2 where Mr. Krabs will announce the new manager.

Gary: Meow.

SpongeBob:Who's it gonna be, Gary? Well, let's ask my wall of 374 consecutive employee-of-the-month awards. (Camera pulls up, revealing many "employee of the month" portraits)

SpongeBob E.O.T.M Awards: SpongeBob SquarePants!

Chapter 3.2: Ready for the speech

SpongeBob: I'm ready. Promotion. (Goes into walk-in shower, Eats soap, Inserts a hose in his head, Puffs up until soap comes out, SpongeBob pulls out paper-like fabric, folds into his pants, back springs off, reviling his rear, brushes eyes with toothpaste, wipes off foam) Cleanliness is next to manager-liness. (Goes outside and runs around in circles) I'm ready. Promotion. Krupepa. I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion.

(The scene is zooming to Squidward's house, and then cuts to Squidward in his bathroom)

Squidward: La da dee, la da doo, la da dum, La da dee, la da doo, la da dum, La da dee, la da doo, la da dum, La da dee, la da doo, la da dum.

Squidward and SpongeBob in unision: La da dee, la da doo, la da dum,La da d...

Squidward: Huh?

SpongeBob singing solo:...ee, la da doo, la da dum, Bum Bum Bum, Da da da...

Squidward: (interrupts him, and covers himself) SpongeBob!!!!!!! What are you doing in here?

SpongeBob: I have to tell you something, Squidward.

Squidward: Whatever it is, can't it wait until we get to work?

SpongeBob: There's no shower at work.

Squidward: What do you want?

SpongeBob: I just wanted to say I'll be thanking you in my managerial acceptance speech today.

Chapter 3.3: SpongeBob's encounter with Patrick

Squidward: Get out!! (Throws him out the window)

SpongeBob: Okay. I'll see you at the ceremony. (Runs into Patrick, who comes out of his rock)

Patrick: That sounds like the manager of the new Krusty Krab 2.(Realizes that he doesn't have his trunks on.) Oops. Hold on.(Rock closes, with Patrick on it. Then it opens again.) Congratulations, buddy.

SpongeBob: Oh, thanks, Patrick. And tonight, after my big promotion, we're gonna party till we're purple.

Patrick: YEAH I LOVE BEING PURPLE!

SpongeBob: We're going to the place where all the action is.

Patrick: You don't mean...?

SpongeBob: Oh, I mean.

In unision:Goofy Goober's Ice Cream Party Boat!

(Rock closes up on them, and opens up a few seconds later. They now have Goofy Goober hats, and a record begins playing on a record player beside Patrick)

Oh, I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah.
You're a Goofy Goober, yeah.
We're all  Goofy Goobers, yeah.
Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah!
           

SpongeBob: (Notices his watch) I'd better get going. I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion.

Patrick: Good luck, SpongeBob. Hey, look for me at the ceremony. I got a little surprise for you. I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah. (Bounces away)

Chapter 4: KK2 news report/Plankton's Revenge

(The scene cuts to a large crowd gathered in front of the Krusty Krab. Perch Perkins is on TV, reporting)

                  Perch Perkins: Hello, Bikini Bottom! Perch Perkins here, coming to you live from in front of The Krusty Krab restaurant, for years the only place to get a delicious and mouthwatering Krabby Patty. Until today, that is. That's right, folks. Longtime owner Mr. Krabs is opening a new restaurant called The Krusty Krab 2. First of all, congratulations, Mr. Krabs. (Krabs has a big grin on his face)
                  Mr. Krabs: Hello. I like money. 
                  Perch Perkins: What inspired you to build a second Krusty Krab right next door to the original?
                  Mr. Krabs: Money. (Everyone laughs)
                  (Plankton is watching the entire scenario out the window of the Chum Bucket)             

Plankton: Curses! It's not fair. Krabs is being interviewed by Perch Perkins, and I've never even had one customer!(the word "customer" is heard echoing in the kitchen) (Plankton groans and moans while sweating)

Karen: Don't get worked up again, Plankton, I just mopped the floors.

Plankton: Oh, Karen, my computer wife, if only I could have managed to steal the secret to Krabs' success, the formula for the Krabby Patty. Ohh! Ernh. Then people would line up to eat at my restaurant. Lord knows I've tried. I've exhausted every evil plan in my filing cabinet...from A to Y.

Karen: A to Y?

Plankton: Yeah, A to Y. You know, the alphabet.

Karen: What about Z?

Plankton: Z?

Karen: Z. The letter after Y.

Plankton: (Searches through cabinet) W, X, Y, Z. Plan Z! Here it is, just like you said.

Karen: Oh, boy.

Plankton:(Suggestively) Oh! Oh! Ohhh! It's evil. It's diabolical. (Sniffs it) It's lemon-scented. This Plan Z can't possibly fail! (Goes outside) So enjoy today, Mr. Krabs, because by tomorrow, I'll have the formula. Then everyone will eat at the Chum Bucket, and I will rule the world! All hail Plankton. All hail Plank...! (SpongeBob runs by and accidentally steps on him)

Chapter 5: SpongeBob's encounter with plankton

SpongeBob: I'm ready,promotion... I'm ready,promotion...

Plankton:(While being stepped on by SpongeBob)Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

SpongeBob: Eww, I think I stepped in something.

(Tries to scrape Plankton off)

Plankton: Aaaaaagggghhh! Aaaaaggggghhhh! Not in something, on someone, you twit!

SpongeBob: Oh. Sorry, Plankton. (Pulls him off his shoe) Are you on your way to the grand-opening ceremony?

Plankton: No, I am not on my way over to the grand-opening ceremony. I'm busy planning to rule the world!

SpongeBob: Well, good luck with that. (Runs off) I'm ready. Promotion. I'm ready. Promotion.

Plankton: Stupid kid.

Chapter 6: Squid's new job

(Later, Mr. Krabs is at a stand in front of the Krusty Krab 2. The crowd is still gathered there, seated)

                  Mr. Krabs: Welcome. Welcome, everyone, to the grand opening of The Krusty Krab 2. 
                  Mrs. Puff: We paid $9 for this? 
                  Sandy: I paid $10! 
                  Mr. Krabs: Now, before we begin with the ribbon-cutting, I'd like to announce the name of our new manager.
                  SpongeBob: Yay! Yeah! Owh! Ah-hao! Yeah! Now we're talking! Yeah! Owh! Shh! 
                  Mr. Krabs: Eheh. Yes. Well, anyway... The new manager is a loyal, hard-working employee.
                  SpongeBob (Thinking): Yes.
                  Mr. Krabs: The obvious choice for the job.
                  SpongeBob (Thinking) : He's right.
                  Mr. Krabs: A name you all know. It starts with an S.
                  SpongeBob: (Thinking)  That's me.
                  Mr. Krabs: Please welcome our new manager...Squidward Tentacles! (A banner falls with Squidward's face on it)
              

SpongeBob: Yes! Yeah! Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha! (Shaking Squidward's hand) Oh, better luck next time, buddy. Whoooo! Whoooo-hoo-hoo! Yeah! All right! Whoooooo! (Grabs the microphone) People of Bikini Bottom, as the manager of...

Mr. Krabs: Uh, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: Hold the phone, folks, I'm getting an important news flash from Mr. Krabs. Go ahead, Mr. K. (Mr. Krabs whispers into his ear.) I'm making a complete what of myself? (Mr. Krabs whispers again) The most embarrassing thing you've ever seen? (Mr. Krabs whispers a third time) And now it's worse because I'm repeating everything you say into the microphone?

Chapter 7: The sad truth

Mr. Krabs: Oh, for crying out loud, SpongeBob! You didn't get the job!

SpongeBob: What?

Mr. Krabs: You... did not... get... the job.

SpongeBob: But... But why?

Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, you're a great fry cook, but I gave the job to Squidward because being manager is a big responsibility. Well, let's face it, he's more... mature than you.

SpongeBob: I'm not... mature?

Mr. Krabs: Lad, I mean this in the nicest of ways, but there's a word for what you are, and that word is... now, let's see...

Lenny: Dork?

Mr. Krabs: No, wait, that's not right. Not a dork.

Pearl: A goofball?

Mr. Krabs: Closer, but no, no, no.

Jim: A ding-a-ling.

Steve: Wing nut.

Miranda: A Knucklehead McSpazatron!

Mr. Krabs: OK, that's enough! Look, what I'm trying to say is, you're just a kid. And to be a manager, you have to be a man. Otherwise they'd call it "kid-ager. " You understand-ager? I mean, you understand?

SpongeBob: I guess so, Mr. Krabs.

Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob?

(SpongeBob walks away)

SpongeBob (depressed): I'm ready. Depression. I'm ready. Depression.

Mr. Krabs: Poor kid.

Chapter 8: Patrick's interruption

(Patrick suddenly appears flying on a banner naked with a GO SPONGEBOB flag in his butt.)

Patrick: Hooray for SpongeBob! Hooray for SpongeBob! Let's hear it for SpongeBob!

(Patrick accidentally hits the stage which sets on fire. Everyone except for Patrick runs away.)

Patrick: Hello? Where'd everybody go? Did I miss something? Did you see my butt?

French Narrator: Later that evening...[[Category:The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie

The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie Transcript

Part 1 ● Part 2 ● Part 3 ● Part 4 ● Part 5

The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie