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Transcript: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie/Part 3
Dialogue
(The group happily reaches the top of a trench as SpongeBob notices a sign)
SpongeBob: "Shell City, dead ahead." We did it, Pat! We made it past everything! Even the hideous, disgusting monsters. (Monsters begin to walk away) Not you guys. You guys are awesome! (Monsters just keep walking) Well, Patrick, we should be there in one more verse.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Now that we're men... (They are interrupted by Dennis the exterminator)
Dennis: Finally. I got you right where I want you.
SpongeBob: Can I help you with something, sir?
Dennis: Name's Dennis. I've been hired to exterminate you.
SpongeBob: You're gonna exterminate us? Listen, junior, you caught me and my friend here in a good mood today, so I'm gonna let you off with a warning. Step aside, and you won't have to feel the awesome wrath of our mustaches.
Dennis: You mean these? (Takes SpongeBob and Patrick's fake mustache from their faces) I thought you still had a piece of salad stuck to your lip from lunchtime.
SpongeBob: They were fake?
Dennis: Of course they were fake! This is what a real mustache looks like. (He grows a mustache)
Patrick: Is he a mermaid?
Dennis: All right. Enough gab.
SpongeBob: What are you gonna do to us?
Dennis: Plankton was very specific.
SpongeBob: Plankton?
Dennis: For some reason, he wanted me to step on you.
Patrick: Step on us?
Dennis: Yeah! That way you'll never find out that he stole the crown! Perhaps I've said too much. (Raises up his foot, ready to step on the two)
SpongeBob: That's a big boot.
Dennis: Don't worry. This will only hurt a lot. I love this job! (An extremely large boot stomps on Dennis)
Patrick: Bigger boot! (Starts to run away, but SpongeBob stops him)
SpongeBob: Wait, Pat. This bigger boot saved our lives. Thank you, stranger. Stranger?
Patrick: It's the Cyclops! (The two begin to run, but the Cyclops grabs them and takes them with him)
SpongeBob and Patrick: Help us! Help us! Save us, someone!
(SpongeBob and Patrick have recovered)
Patrick: Are we dead?
SpongeBob: I don't think so. (Inspects the ground) Artificially colored rocks? I don't know where we are. What is this?
Patrick: It's some kind of wall of psychic energy. (Taps the glass of the fishbowl they are in)
SpongeBob: No, Pat, it's a giant glass bowl. Hey, there's some fish folk. (We see some dead fish on the shelves and nooks)
SpongeBob and Patrick: Hey, over here! Hey! Hey! Hey, you guys! You guys, hey! Help! Hey! Help! A little help here! We're stuck in this... Help us out of the tank!
SpongeBob: Wait a second. Those fish are dead!
Patrick: What's he gonna do with us? (The Cyclops appears and takes out a small toolbox) Oh, no, he's going for his evil instruments of torture. (The cyclops takes out glue and google eyes)
SpongeBob: Glue? Google eyes? He's making a humorous diorama of (The Cyclops glues the google eyes on a clam, and puts a hat on it and a play phone near it) ... Alexander Clam Bell? Patrick, he's killing sea animals and making them into smelly knickknacks. And I think we're next.
Patrick: You think so? (Cyclops takes Patrick out of bowl)
SpongeBob: Patrick! No! (Cyclops takes SpongeBob out of bowl and puts both on a table with a heating lamp in front) The heat is so intense from this lamp that I can't move.
Patrick: Tell me about it.
SpongeBob: This doesn't look too good, Patrick.
Patrick: (In a old man voice) You mean we're not gonna get the crown, save the town and Mr. Krabs?
SpongeBob: I don't even think we're gonna be able to save ourselves, buddy. (SpongeBob's arm falls off, then Patrick puts it back)
SpongeBob: Thanks.
Patrick: Don't mention it.
SpongeBob: Well, it looks like what everybody said about us is true, Patrick.
Patrick: You mean that we're attractive?
SpongeBob: No, that we're just kids. A couple of kids in way over their heads. We were doomed from the start. I mean, look at us. We didn't even come close to the crown. We let everybody down. We failed.
Patrick: Shell City.
SpongeBob: Yeah, we never made it to Shell City.
Patrick: Shell City.
SpongeBob: Exactly, buddy. Yeah, the place we never got to.
Patrick: Shell City.
SpongeBob: OK, now you're starting to bum me out, Patrick.
Patrick: No, look at the sign. (SpongeBob sees what he was talking about. A sign by the door) "Shell City. Marine gifts and sundries."
SpongeBob: Shell City is a gift shop? But if this is Shell City, then where's the...? (He and Patrick notice Neptune's crown sitting on a cushion)
Patrick and SpongeBob: Crown!
SpongeBob: Neptune's crown. This is Shell City. Pat, we did make it. Yeah, I guess we did. We did all right for a couple of goofballs. (Both shed one tear of joy)
SpongeBob: (In a weakly voice) I'm a Goofy Goober, yeah...
Patrick: (Also in a weakly voice) You're a Goofy Goober, yeah...
SpongeBob and Patrick: We're all Goofy Goobers, yeah Goofy, goofy, goober, goober, yeah (The two dehydrate and die)
(Back in the theater, all of the pirates are crying)
Captain: That's the end of SpongeBob. (To a pirate) Come here, you. (Hugs him tight)
Captain's Parrot: Shut up and look at the screen.
Captain: The bird's right. Look! It be the tear of the Goofy Goobers.
(Back in the movie, we see SpongeBob and Patrick's tears short circuit the lamp, and the smoke turns on the sprinklers. They come back to life from the water and suffocate for one second)
SpongeBob: Hey, we're alive! Let's get that crown.
Patrick: Right. (He and Sponge rush over to the crown and get ready to pick it up)
SpongeBob: On three, Patrick. Ready? One, two, three. (They pick it up) Hey, it's lighter than I thought. (The camera pulls up to reveal that the Cyclops is the one that picked it up. Suddenly, all of the sea creatures in the room begin to shake and come back to life because of the water sprinklers)
Patrick: What's happening?
SpongeBob: I don't know. Look! (All of the sea creatures are now alive. They attack the Cyclops and Sponge and Pat escape) Come on, Patrick. Let's get this crown back to Bikini Bottom. (The two carry the crown outside to the beach)
SpongeBob: Do you still have that bag of winds?
Patrick: I sure do. (Patrick shows a lump on his butt) Here you go. (Pulls out the bag. SpongeBob stares at him, wide-eyed) What?
SpongeBob: Nothing, nothing... Okay, let's go over the instructions. (Reads the paper with the instructions on it) Let's see, it says here, "Step one: Point bag away from home. "
Patrick: OK. (Points bag at Shell City)
SpongeBob: "Step two: Plant feet firmly on ground. "
Patrick: Right! (Plants his feet in the sand)
SpongeBob: "Step three: Remove string from bag, releasing the winds. "
Patrick: Check. (Pulls the string tied around the bag, and the bag flies out of his arm)
SpongeBob: Well, that seems simple enough. Point bag away from home, feet firmly on ground, pull string, releasing the winds. All right, let's do it for real.
Patrick: Uh, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: No, no, stop! (He chases after the bag)
Patrick: I was bad, I'm sorry! Please, bag. I'm sorry, I just thought... It was a mistake!
SpongeBob: Oh, no. How will we ever get back to Bikini Bottom now?
David Hasselhoff: I can take you there. (Sponge and Pat spot David Hasselhoff running towards them)
SpongeBob: Who are you?
David Hasselhoff: I'm David Hasselhoff.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Hooray!
SpongeBob: So where's your boat?
David Hasselhoff: Boat? (He laughs hearty)
(The next scene depicts SpongeBob and Patrick riding toward Bikini Bottom on Hasselhoff)
SpongeBob and Patrick: Go, Hasselhoff!
SpongeBob: Next stop, Bikini Bottom.
(In Bikini Bottom, Plankton's slaves are still under control)
Slaves: All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton.
(Inside the Krusty Krab 2, Plankton is walking in)
Plankton: Well, Krabs, you know what today is? (Looks at calendar. The date is wrong) Sorry about this, calendar. (Changes it) March 14? Wait, that's not right. It should say "The day that Krabs fries!" (Looks out the window and sees Neptune and Mindy arrive) Guess who's here.
(Above the ocean, Hasselhoff is now gliding like a motor boat)
SpongeBob: Hooray for Hasselhoff! Nothing can stop us now.
Patrick: Unidentified object off the hindquarters.
SpongeBob: It looks like... (We see the Cyclops' boot in pursuit of Hasselhoff)
SpongeBob: Bigger boot. But how? (The boot slips onto Hasselhoff’s foot, then lifts, and Dennis reforms, his glasses are broken. SpongeBob and Patrick scream)
Dennis: Did you miss me?
(At the Krusty Krab 2, Neptune and Mindy arrive)
Plankton: (He has popcorn and a drink with him. He is sitting on a small chair) This is the best seat in the house. All right, Neptune, let's get it on!
Neptune: Eugene Krabs, your six-day reprieve is up, and it is time for you to die!
Mr. Krabs: (Krabs is rapidly sweating mounds of ice cubes) Please, I didn't do it.
Neptune: There is nothing else I can do.
Mindy: You can give SpongeBob and Patrick a little more time.
Neptune: Except give SpongeBob and Patrick a little more time... What? (Realizes what he just said, then turns to Mindy) Mindy, will you butt out? I won't have you stalling this execution.
Mindy: Stalling? I'm not stalling anything.
Neptune: Yes, you are.
Mindy: No, I'm not.
Neptune: Yes, you are. You're doing it right now.
Mindy: I'm stalling.
Neptune: Yes.
Mindy: Stalling?
Neptune: Stalling!
Mindy: Stalling.
Neptune: Stalling!
Plankton: Oh, boy.
(Back above the ocean, Dennis has appeared)
Dennis: Now, where were we?
SpongeBob: Patrick, run.
Patrick: No, I'm tired of running. If we run now, we'll never stop... (Dennis throws Patrick towards Hasselhoff's feet) Run, SpongeBob! (Spongy runs. Dennis pulls out a knife, which he accidentally stabs Hasselhoff with)
David Hasselhoff: Take it easy back there, fellas.
Patrick: SpongeBob, be careful.
Dennis: Come on, kid, give it up. Dennis always gets his man.
SpongeBob: Never! (Jumps to Hasselhoff's other foot) Yeah! I did it!
Dennis: You got guts, kid. Too bad I gotta rip them out of you.
SpongeBob: I don't know what Plankton's paying you, but if you let us go, I can make it worth your while. (gives Dennis 5 Gobber Dollars)
Dennis: It's gonna take a lot more than five...What is this?
SpongeBob: That, sir, is five Goober Dollars. Legal tender at any participating Goofy Goober (Grabs SpongeBob)... I got bubbles. Fun at parties. (Wind blows bubbles into Dennis' eyes)
Dennis: My eyes! (Throws SpongeBob)
Patrick: I got you, SpongeBob. (Catches him)
SpongeBob: Thanks, buddy. (Sees Dennis about to step on them) Thanks a lot.
Dennis: (Last lines) That's it. I'm through messing around. See you later, fools! (Is hit by an oncoming bridge, Dennis screams)
Patrick: See you.
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Mindy: So you think....I'm....stalling.
Neptune: Where am I, in Crazytown? I have had enough of this nonsense! You are to wait in the carriage until the execution is done!
Mindy: But, Daddy...
Neptune: Now! (She goes outside. Neptune put locks on the door)
Mindy: No, no, no! Oh, SpongeBob, wherever you are, you better hurry.
Hasselhoff: (Stands up) Okay, fellas, this is where you get off. Bikini Bottom's directly below.
SpongeBob: But we'll never be able to float down in time.
Hasselhoff: Who said anything about floating? (Pecs turn into launchers)
Announcer:Initiating launch sequence.
SpongeBob: Did you see that?
Patrick: The control.
Announcer: All hands on deck. Ten seconds to liftoff. Nine, eight...
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Neptune: (Lights his triton) Eugene Krabs, the time has come...
Mindy: (Outside) No!
Plankton: Yes!
Above Bikini Bottom
Announcer: ...six, five...
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Neptune: ....for you....
Mindy: (Outside) No!
Plankton: Yes!
Above Bikini Bottom
Announcer: ...three, two...
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Neptune: ....to fry!
Mindy: (Outside) No!
Plankton: Yes!
Above Bikini Bottom
Announcer: ... one. (SpongeBob, Patrick, and the crown are launched back down to Bikini Bottom)
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Mr. Krabs: NO! (Just then, Sponge and Pat fall through the roof. Krabs is about to be fried, but the crown blocks the ray, and it is blasted up to land, where Hasselhoff is lying down)
Above Bikini Bottom
Hasselhoff: (Last lines) You done good, Hasselhoff. You done... (He is blasted with Neptune's ray and survives) ow.
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
SpongeBob: Hooray! We made it!
Patrick: We made it!
Neptune:My crown! My beautiful crown!
Mindy: (Comes inside) SpongeBob? Patrick? I knew you could do it! (Hugs them. Plankton then starts clapping slowly)
Plankton: (Sarcastically) Oh, yes. Well done, SpongeBoob.
SpongeBob: (Sarcastically) Sorry to rain on your parade, Plankton.
Plankton: Oh, don't worry about me. My parade shall be quite dry under my umbrella! (Pulls a cord that is hanging above him)
SpongeBob, Mindy, and Patrick: Umbrella? (Turn to Neptune, who is kissing his crown. The ceiling opens up and a helmet falls out. It lands on Neptune's head. He struggles to get it off)
Mindy: Daddy, no!
Plankton: Daddy, yes! (Pulls out a remote control with only a big, red button on it. He presses the button)
Neptune: (We see Neptune still struggling. A few seconds later, he stops and says only 3 words) All hail Plankton. (Mindy, SpongeBob, and Patrick scream. Plankton's slaves burst in through the windows)
Slaves: All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton. (Patrick, Mindy, and SpongeBob back up against the wall. Neptune lights his triton)
Patrick: SpongeBob, what happened?
SpongeBob: Plankton cheated.
Plankton: Cheated? (Now to Neptune) Hold on there, baldy. (Now to SpongeBob) Oh, grow up. What, you think this is a game of kickball on the playground? You never had a chance to defeat me, fool! And you know why?
SpongeBob: Because you cheated?
Plankton: No, not because I cheated! Because I'm an evil genius. And you're just a kid. A stupid kid!
SpongeBob: I guess you're right, Plankton. I am just a kid.
Plankton: Of course I'm right. Okay, Neptune, time to kill.
SpongeBob: And you know, I've been through a lot in the past six days, five minutes, and seven-and-a-half seconds. And if I've learned anything during that time, It's that you are who you are.
Plankton: That's right. Okay, Neptune...
SpongeBob: And no amount of mermaid magic...(Turns to Mindy)...or managerial promotion... (Turns to the frozen Mr. Krabs)...or some other third thing...can make me anything more than what I really am inside: A kid.
Plankton: That's great. Now, get back against the wall.
SpongeBob: But that's okay.
Plankton: What? What's going on?
SpongeBob: Because I did what everyone said a kid couldn't do. I made it to Shell City, and I beat the Cyclops, and I rode the Hasselhoff, and I brought the crown back.
Plankton: All right, we get the point.
SpongeBob: So, yeah, I'm a kid. And I'm also a goofball. And a wing nut. And a Knucklehead McSpazatron!
Plankton: What's going on here?
SpongeBob: But most of all, I'm... (fog starts to appear)
Plankton: Okay, settle down. Take it easy.
SpongeBob: I'm... I'm...
Plankton: What the scallop?!
SpongeBob: (Bursts into song) I'm a Goofy Goober! Rock! (Plankton is flung into the wall) You're a Goofy Goober! Rock! We're all Goofy Goobers! Rock! Goofy, goofy, goober, goober! Put your toys away, Well, all I gotta say when you tell me not to play, I say no way. No way! No, no ******* way! I'm a kid, you say, when you say I'm a kid I say, "Say it again" and then I say thanks. Thanks! Thank you very much! So if you're thinking that you'd like to be like me, Go ahead and try. The kid inside will set you free! I'm a Goofy Goober! Rock!
Plankton: (He is recovering from being flung into the wall) What's happening? (Sees SpongeBob dancing) His dance moves are impressive, but I'm in control. (To slaves) Seize him!
Slaves: All hail Plankton. (Crowd in around SpongeBob. A few seconds later, SpongeBob bursts out in a wizard costume, playing an electric guitar, which he uses to free a fish)
Fish: (After SpongeBob zaps his helmet, and it comes off)I'm free. I've been freed!
Plankton: What? (SpongeBob zaps more helmets off) No! (More helmets come off) My precious helmets! (SpongeBob zaps the helmets off Squidward, Mrs. Puff, Sandy, and Gary)
Sandy: (last lines) Yee-haw!
Gary: (last lines) Meow.
Plankton: His chops are too righteous. The helmets can't handle this level of rock 'n' roll. Karen, do something. Karen? (Looks for her. She is surfing the crowd) All right, that's the last straw. Neptune, I command you to...(SpongeBob frees Neptune. Mindy hands him his crown)
Mindy: Here you go, Daddy.
Plankton: I better get out of here. (Runs for the door, but more freed fish burst in)
Fish: Look, it's the wizard who saved us.
Plankton: Out of my way, fools. (The freed fish ignore him and rush to see SpongeBob, running over Plankton in the process)Ow! Ow! Ow! (yelping)
Outside the Krusty Krab, later
Plankton: (last lines) (He is know squished into the form of a shoe. The policemen pick him up and put him in a cage) Come on, I was just kidding. Come on, you guys knew that, didn't you? With the helmets and the big monuments...Wasn't that hilarious, everybody? (His cage is put in a police car, which drives away) I will destroy all of you! (Everyone that was watching go inside the Krusty Krab 2)
Inside the Krusty Krab 2
Neptune: Well, Mindy, I have to admit, you were right. Your compassion for these sea creatures proved a most admirable trait. Without it, I would have never again seen my beloved crown. I think you're going to make a fine ruler of the sea one day. Now, let's go home. (Turns to leave, but is stopped by Mindy)
Mindy: (last lines) Daddy, haven't you forgotten something?
Neptune: What? Oh, yeah. Eugene Krabs, I forgot to unfreeze you. (He does so, but Mr. Krabs is now a human instead of a crab)
Krabs Boy: What the...?
Neptune: I guess I had it set to "real boy" ending. (Sets it right) He then turns Krabs back into a crab) Oh, I'm sorry for falsely freezing you, Krabs. And may I say, sir, you are a very lucky fellow to have in your employment such a brave, faithful, and heroic young lad. Where is he, anyway?
SpongeBob: I'm up here. (We see him hanging from ropes)
Patrick: (Last lines) I'm on it. (Gets SpongeBob down)
Neptune: (Last lines) Go to him now, Krabs. Embrace him. (Krabs walks over to SpongeBob)
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, me boy, I'm sorry I ever doubted ye. That's a mistake I won't make again.
SpongeBob: Oh, Mr. Krabs, you old soft-serve. (They hug)
Mr. Krabs: And now, SpongeBob, I'm gonna do something that I should've done six days ago. Mr. Squidward! Front and center, please. (Squidward comes)I think we all know who rightfully deserves to wear that manager pin. (Looks at SpongeBob)
Squidward: I couldn't agree more, sir.
Mr. Krabs: (Last lines) Hooray for SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Wait a second, everybody. There's something I need to say first. I just don't know how to put it.
Squidward: (Last lines) I think I know what it is. After going on your life-changing journey, you now realize you don't want what you thought you wanted. What you really wanted was inside you all along.
SpongeBob: (Last lines) Are you crazy? (Grabs manager pin)I was just gonna say that your fly is down! (Squidward's eyes widen) Manager! This is the greatest day of my life! (The credits begin rolling as songs play)
Songs:
(A curtain goes over the screen, then scene shows the pirates in the theater again)
Captain: You know, David Hasselhoff is a great artist.
Usher: Excuse me, sir. You folks have to leave.
Captain: What? Say that again, if you dare. (Points his sword at her)
Usher: You folks have to leave.
Captain: Okay. (Him and all of the other pirates leave)
| The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie Transcript |
| Part 1 ● Part 2 ● Part 3 ● Part 4 ● Part 5 |
| The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie |
|
Characters: David Hasselhoff • Dennis (eliminator) • Cyclops • Goofy Goober • Karen • King Neptune • Mr. Krabs • Patrick Star • Mindy • Sheldon J. Plankton • SpongeBob SquarePants • Gas Station Attendants • Car Stealer |
