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Episode Transcript: Slimy Dancing
| Line 20: | Line 20: | ||
Squidward: Well, Squidward, ol' boy, all that's left is to go win that dancing trophy and give it a home. After all, nobody ever worked harder to get it than you. (flashback to him dancing with some other fish) All those years of training with the masters. Your tireless effort to keep your instrument supple. (flashback to him getting his legs twisted and stretched) Not to mention your weekly thigh waxing. (pulls some hair off his leg) And now, it's time to go get it. So, let's do it. Whoo...! (runs out of his house and into a bar of bamboo)<br> | Squidward: Well, Squidward, ol' boy, all that's left is to go win that dancing trophy and give it a home. After all, nobody ever worked harder to get it than you. (flashback to him dancing with some other fish) All those years of training with the masters. Your tireless effort to keep your instrument supple. (flashback to him getting his legs twisted and stretched) Not to mention your weekly thigh waxing. (pulls some hair off his leg) And now, it's time to go get it. So, let's do it. Whoo...! (runs out of his house and into a bar of bamboo)<br> | ||
| − | Patrick: Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. Want to give me a ruling, | + | Patrick: Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. Want to give me a ruling, SpongeBob?<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Sorry, Squidward, you got to go lower to win.<br> | |
Squidward: What? What are you two doing?<br> | Squidward: What? What are you two doing?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: We're limbo dancing to get ready for the dance-a-ton auditions.<br> | |
Patrick: We're gonna win the trophy.<br> | Patrick: We're gonna win the trophy.<br> | ||
| Line 33: | Line 33: | ||
trophy case)<br> | trophy case)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: You built us a trophy case for when we win? (both hug Squidward) Oh, you are a true friend.<br> | |
Squidward: no, you twits. I built that trophy case for me when I win. I'm going to ace the tryouts today and then I'm going | Squidward: no, you twits. I built that trophy case for me when I win. I'm going to ace the tryouts today and then I'm going | ||
| Line 41: | Line 41: | ||
Patrick: Ruling, Spongebob?<br> | Patrick: Ruling, Spongebob?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: I think we better raise the bar. (cut to the tryouts where Squidward sits down on the bench)<br> | |
| − | + | SpongeBob & Patrick: Hiya, Squidward. | |
Squidward: Oh, great. The flying Gyvonne Brothers. Just ignore them, Squidward.<br> | Squidward: Oh, great. The flying Gyvonne Brothers. Just ignore them, Squidward.<br> | ||
| Line 49: | Line 49: | ||
Female: (over loudspeaker) Contestants 51 and 52 to the stage, please.<br> | Female: (over loudspeaker) Contestants 51 and 52 to the stage, please.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: We're up, Patrick. Wish us luck, Squidward.<br> | |
Squidward: Do I know you?<br> | Squidward: Do I know you?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: (laughs) You kidder. Let's go, Patrick.<br> | |
Squidward: Poor boobs, they don't stand a chance. (laughs)<br> | Squidward: Poor boobs, they don't stand a chance. (laughs)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Well, see you at the finals tomorrow, Squidward.<br> | |
Squidward: You actually got in?<br> | Squidward: You actually got in?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Yep.<br> | |
Squidward: Humph, if those two nitwits made it then I'm a shoo-in.<br> | Squidward: Humph, if those two nitwits made it then I'm a shoo-in.<br> | ||
| Line 76: | Line 76: | ||
Judge: You're done. You know, next contestant. You didn't make the cut, sorry, Mac.<br> | Judge: You're done. You know, next contestant. You didn't make the cut, sorry, Mac.<br> | ||
| − | Squidward: But, but, but, but, you don't understand. I already build a trophy case with the cutest little plaque. If I | + | Squidward: But, but, but, but, you don't understand. I already build a trophy case with the cutest little plaque. If I could just touch it... (grabs the trophy)<br> |
| − | could just touch it... (grabs the trophy)<br> | + | |
Judge: Hey!<br> | Judge: Hey!<br> | ||
| Line 84: | Line 83: | ||
into his house and walking into a limbo bar again)<br> | into his house and walking into a limbo bar again)<br> | ||
| − | Patrick: | + | Patrick: SpongeBob?<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: You're just not getting into the spirit of this thing, Squidward.<br> | |
Squidward: Doh, help me up.<br> | Squidward: Doh, help me up.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: How'd the audition go, Squidward?<br> | |
Squidward: The audition? My trophy? (sobs) I mean, uh, uh, yeah, the audition. (chuckles) Evidently, I'm such a great | Squidward: The audition? My trophy? (sobs) I mean, uh, uh, yeah, the audition. (chuckles) Evidently, I'm such a great | ||
| Line 97: | Line 96: | ||
Patrick: Whoa.<br> | Patrick: Whoa.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Impressive. (gasps) Hey, Squidward, would you be our coach for the finals?<br> | |
Squidward: What? I've got better thinks to do than help you two dopes.<br> | Squidward: What? I've got better thinks to do than help you two dopes.<br> | ||
| Line 105: | Line 104: | ||
Squidward: Fine. But I keep the trophy when we win, deal?<br> | Squidward: Fine. But I keep the trophy when we win, deal?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob & Patrick: Deal.<br> | |
Squidward: Ok. Show me what you got, Patrick.<br> | Squidward: Ok. Show me what you got, Patrick.<br> | ||
| Line 111: | Line 110: | ||
Patrick: Ok, here I go. Watch me now. (goes under the limbo stick but gets a cramp before going all the way through) Cramp! (screams and rolls around. Squidward opens the door and Patrick rolls outside)<br> | Patrick: Ok, here I go. Watch me now. (goes under the limbo stick but gets a cramp before going all the way through) Cramp! (screams and rolls around. Squidward opens the door and Patrick rolls outside)<br> | ||
| − | Squidward: Well, I guess that just leaves you, | + | Squidward: Well, I guess that just leaves you, SpongeBob. Show me your stuff. Ready, and... (turns on some music. SpongeBob |
laughs and wiggles his arms and legs all around the room. Squidward grabs his arms) Having fun?<br> | laughs and wiggles his arms and legs all around the room. Squidward grabs his arms) Having fun?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Yes, yes I am.<br> | |
| − | Squidward: | + | Squidward: SpongeBob, dancing isn't supposed to be fun. It's supposed to be art and art is suffering! Now, we'll start with |
| − | some ballet. Watch my feet and follow my lead. Ready, and | + | some ballet. Watch my feet and follow my lead. Ready, and ply. (SpongeBob and Squidward bend their knees) Relive. (twirl around on their toes) And now grand jet. (Squidward slips on the limbo stick) Where am I? See if I can find the lights. |
| − | around on their toes) And now grand | + | (turns on the light and sees a giant SpongeBob face. Squidward's head is stuck inside SpongeBob’s body) Wait a minute. |
| − | (turns on the light and sees a giant | + | (feels around) This gives me an idea. (Squidward's body is now inside SpongeBob’s) Ready, SpongeBob? A one and a two, and ply. Relive. Grand jet. (SpongeBob’s legs get tangled in a knot) No, no, no. This will never work. You've got two left |
| − | (feels around) This gives me an idea. (Squidward's body is now inside | + | |
| − | + | ||
feet.<br> | feet.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: How'd you know?<br> | |
| − | Squidward: Gimme those. (takes | + | Squidward: Gimme those. (takes SpongeBob’s legs and puts his own legs through SpongeBob’s pants) That's better. Ok, let's |
| − | go. | + | go. SpongeBob, what are you doing? (SpongeBob’s arms are in the air wiggling) Why are you moving your arms like that?<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: (laughs) I guess they're happy.<br> | |
| − | Squidward: Argh, hand 'em over. ( | + | Squidward: Argh, hand 'em over. (SpongeBob hands Squidward one of his arms) And the other one, come on. (Squidward breaks |
| − | off the other one then uses his arms as | + | off the other one then uses his arms as SpongeBob’s) Ah, now that's more like it.<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: Gee, Squidward, with your arms and legs doing all the work, I'm not really doing anything. I think I should | |
help.<br> | help.<br> | ||
Squidward: Are you questioning my leadership.<br> | Squidward: Are you questioning my leadership.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Well, I just...<br> | |
| − | Squidward: Ok, hand it over. ( | + | Squidward: Ok, hand it over. (SpongeBob hands his mouth to Squidward)<br> |
| − | + | SpongeBob: You know what, Squidward?<br> | |
Squidward: What's that?<br> | Squidward: What's that?<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: I think I'm suffering for my art now. (cut to the dance recital where a fish is already dancing) Good gravy. Get | |
a load of the talent here.<br> | a load of the talent here.<br> | ||
| Line 155: | Line 152: | ||
down. The judges score him a 29.5.)<br> | down. The judges score him a 29.5.)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Oh my goodness. I am honored to be in the presence of such divine talent.<br> | |
Squidward: Quit groveling. Where is your dignity? These losers are here to worship us. I mean me. By the end of the night | Squidward: Quit groveling. Where is your dignity? These losers are here to worship us. I mean me. By the end of the night | ||
I'll have them on their knees just begging for more.<br> | I'll have them on their knees just begging for more.<br> | ||
| − | Female: (over loudspeaker) Now that's what I like to call a hard act to follow. Next up, we have | + | Female: (over loudspeaker) Now that's what I like to call a hard act to follow. Next up, we have SpongeBob SquarePants.<br> |
Fish: Oh, man. I can't wait. I am so stoked on dancing right now.<br> | Fish: Oh, man. I can't wait. I am so stoked on dancing right now.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Now, before I begin, let me just thank you all for coming out tonight. (Squidward grabs SpongeBob’s mouth)<br> | |
Squidward: Will you stop it? And let my dancing do the talking.<br> (dances)<br> | Squidward: Will you stop it? And let my dancing do the talking.<br> (dances)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Wow, Squidward, the crowd's gone silent.<br> | |
Squidward: Of course they have. They are in the presence of a true artiste.<br> | Squidward: Of course they have. They are in the presence of a true artiste.<br> | ||
| Line 179: | Line 176: | ||
Fish #4: I think I'm gonna be sick. (throws up)<br> | Fish #4: I think I'm gonna be sick. (throws up)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Uh, Squidward?<br> | |
Squidward: Ha. If they think that's good, wait till they see... (gets a knot in his leg) Cramp! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! (bounces | Squidward: Ha. If they think that's good, wait till they see... (gets a knot in his leg) Cramp! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! (bounces | ||
around on the floor while everyone leaves. A man who was asleep wakes up and is about to walk out the door)<br> | around on the floor while everyone leaves. A man who was asleep wakes up and is about to walk out the door)<br> | ||
| − | Fish #5: Hey, guys, wait up. Huh? What's this? (sees | + | Fish #5: Hey, guys, wait up. Huh? What's this? (sees SpongeBob dancing) That's kind of nice. Hey guys, come check this |
out.<br> | out.<br> | ||
Squidward: Must finish dance... on other... (gets another cramp in the other leg)<br> | Squidward: Must finish dance... on other... (gets another cramp in the other leg)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Um, Squidward, is this part of the act?<br> | |
Squidward: (screams) The pain! (crowd cheers and throws flower onto the stage)<br> | Squidward: (screams) The pain! (crowd cheers and throws flower onto the stage)<br> | ||
| Line 199: | Line 196: | ||
Judge #2: Never before have I seen such zest, such joie de vivre.<br> | Judge #2: Never before have I seen such zest, such joie de vivre.<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: Oh, thank you, you're too kind. But I couldn't have done it without a very special someone. (grabs Squidward)<br> | |
| − | Squidward: Wait, | + | Squidward: Wait, SpongeBob, no! (is pulled out from SpongeBob’s body)<br> |
Judge #2: The rules clearly state "A single dancer must perform without any further assistance from a partner." Therefore, | Judge #2: The rules clearly state "A single dancer must perform without any further assistance from a partner." Therefore, | ||
| Line 228: | Line 225: | ||
Judge #2: Oh, well, then. I guess he wins. (Patrick screams some more as everyone else cheers)<br> | Judge #2: Oh, well, then. I guess he wins. (Patrick screams some more as everyone else cheers)<br> | ||
| − | + | SpongeBob: I love your new dance, Patrick.<br> | |
Patrick: Thanks.<br> | Patrick: Thanks.<br> | ||
| Line 234: | Line 231: | ||
Narrator: Epilogue.<br> | Narrator: Epilogue.<br> | ||
| − | Mom: Tommy? I've got a fresh load of laundr... (screams as she thinks Tommy is having a | + | Mom: Tommy? I've got a fresh load of laundr... (screams as she thinks Tommy is having a seizure on the floor) Tommy, oh, |
oh, dear me, no! (dials 911) Hello, it's an emergency! My son! He's...<br> | oh, dear me, no! (dials 911) Hello, it's an emergency! My son! He's...<br> | ||
Tommy: (scoffs) Mom, calm down. (stops music) I'm just doing "the cramp"!<br> | Tommy: (scoffs) Mom, calm down. (stops music) I'm just doing "the cramp"!<br> | ||
| − | Mom: (hangs up phone) Oh, oh you kids and your carzy dance fads. (she laughs and is soon joined by Mr Krabs, | + | Mom: (hangs up phone) Oh, oh you kids and your carzy dance fads. (she laughs and is soon joined by Mr Krabs, SpongeBob, |
Patrick, and Squidward)<br> | Patrick, and Squidward)<br> | ||
Revision as of 06:11, 12 April 2008
| Back Episode Transcript | Next Episode Transcript |
|---|---|
| SpongeBob vs. Patty Gadget | The Krusty Sponge |
Episode Article: Slimy Dancing
Characters
(Squidward is putting the finishing touches on a trophy case)
Squidward: Well, Squidward, ol' boy, all that's left is to go win that dancing trophy and give it a home. After all, nobody ever worked harder to get it than you. (flashback to him dancing with some other fish) All those years of training with the masters. Your tireless effort to keep your instrument supple. (flashback to him getting his legs twisted and stretched) Not to mention your weekly thigh waxing. (pulls some hair off his leg) And now, it's time to go get it. So, let's do it. Whoo...! (runs out of his house and into a bar of bamboo)
Patrick: Tsk, tsk, tsk, tsk. Want to give me a ruling, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: Sorry, Squidward, you got to go lower to win.
Squidward: What? What are you two doing?
SpongeBob: We're limbo dancing to get ready for the dance-a-ton auditions.
Patrick: We're gonna win the trophy.
Squidward: Ha. The two of you? Don't make me laugh. Come here... see that? That's where the trophy's going. (shows them the
trophy case)
SpongeBob: You built us a trophy case for when we win? (both hug Squidward) Oh, you are a true friend.
Squidward: no, you twits. I built that trophy case for me when I win. I'm going to ace the tryouts today and then I'm going
to the finals tomorrow and win the trophy. I am going forth to meet my destiny. Good-bye. (runs out but runs into the limbo
bar again)
Patrick: Ruling, Spongebob?
SpongeBob: I think we better raise the bar. (cut to the tryouts where Squidward sits down on the bench)
SpongeBob & Patrick: Hiya, Squidward.
Squidward: Oh, great. The flying Gyvonne Brothers. Just ignore them, Squidward.
Female: (over loudspeaker) Contestants 51 and 52 to the stage, please.
SpongeBob: We're up, Patrick. Wish us luck, Squidward.
Squidward: Do I know you?
SpongeBob: (laughs) You kidder. Let's go, Patrick.
Squidward: Poor boobs, they don't stand a chance. (laughs)
SpongeBob: Well, see you at the finals tomorrow, Squidward.
Squidward: You actually got in?
SpongeBob: Yep.
Squidward: Humph, if those two nitwits made it then I'm a shoo-in.
Female: (over loudspeaker) Contestant 53 to the stage, please.
Squidward: Look out, dancing world, here comes your future. Music, please. (dances)
Judge: Next.
Squidward: Excuse me?
Judge: You're done. You know, next contestant. You didn't make the cut, sorry, Mac.
Squidward: But, but, but, but, you don't understand. I already build a trophy case with the cutest little plaque. If I could just touch it... (grabs the trophy)
Judge: Hey!
Squidward: But I, hey... (guards punch Squidward out of the building) Unhand me, you brutes. Ah! (cut to Squidward crying
into his house and walking into a limbo bar again)
Patrick: SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: You're just not getting into the spirit of this thing, Squidward.
Squidward: Doh, help me up.
SpongeBob: How'd the audition go, Squidward?
Squidward: The audition? My trophy? (sobs) I mean, uh, uh, yeah, the audition. (chuckles) Evidently, I'm such a great
dancer that I've been banned from the competition for life.
Patrick: Whoa.
SpongeBob: Impressive. (gasps) Hey, Squidward, would you be our coach for the finals?
Squidward: What? I've got better thinks to do than help you two dopes.
Patrick: Like polishing your empty trophy case?
Squidward: Fine. But I keep the trophy when we win, deal?
SpongeBob & Patrick: Deal.
Squidward: Ok. Show me what you got, Patrick.
Patrick: Ok, here I go. Watch me now. (goes under the limbo stick but gets a cramp before going all the way through) Cramp! (screams and rolls around. Squidward opens the door and Patrick rolls outside)
Squidward: Well, I guess that just leaves you, SpongeBob. Show me your stuff. Ready, and... (turns on some music. SpongeBob
laughs and wiggles his arms and legs all around the room. Squidward grabs his arms) Having fun?
SpongeBob: Yes, yes I am.
Squidward: SpongeBob, dancing isn't supposed to be fun. It's supposed to be art and art is suffering! Now, we'll start with
some ballet. Watch my feet and follow my lead. Ready, and ply. (SpongeBob and Squidward bend their knees) Relive. (twirl around on their toes) And now grand jet. (Squidward slips on the limbo stick) Where am I? See if I can find the lights.
(turns on the light and sees a giant SpongeBob face. Squidward's head is stuck inside SpongeBob’s body) Wait a minute.
(feels around) This gives me an idea. (Squidward's body is now inside SpongeBob’s) Ready, SpongeBob? A one and a two, and ply. Relive. Grand jet. (SpongeBob’s legs get tangled in a knot) No, no, no. This will never work. You've got two left
feet.
SpongeBob: How'd you know?
Squidward: Gimme those. (takes SpongeBob’s legs and puts his own legs through SpongeBob’s pants) That's better. Ok, let's
go. SpongeBob, what are you doing? (SpongeBob’s arms are in the air wiggling) Why are you moving your arms like that?
SpongeBob: (laughs) I guess they're happy.
Squidward: Argh, hand 'em over. (SpongeBob hands Squidward one of his arms) And the other one, come on. (Squidward breaks
off the other one then uses his arms as SpongeBob’s) Ah, now that's more like it.
SpongeBob: Gee, Squidward, with your arms and legs doing all the work, I'm not really doing anything. I think I should
help.
Squidward: Are you questioning my leadership.
SpongeBob: Well, I just...
Squidward: Ok, hand it over. (SpongeBob hands his mouth to Squidward)
SpongeBob: You know what, Squidward?
Squidward: What's that?
SpongeBob: I think I'm suffering for my art now. (cut to the dance recital where a fish is already dancing) Good gravy. Get
a load of the talent here.
Squidward: Oh, please. Just wait until you see my brilliant moves. (the fish who is dancing falls on his face. The crowd
gasps as the judges give him a total score of 5. The next dancer is a whale balancing a ball on its head. The judges total
score is 23.5. The next dancer is a giant sea horse. Then a dancer who can balance coins on his arms while jumping up and
down. The judges score him a 29.5.)
SpongeBob: Oh my goodness. I am honored to be in the presence of such divine talent.
Squidward: Quit groveling. Where is your dignity? These losers are here to worship us. I mean me. By the end of the night
I'll have them on their knees just begging for more.
Female: (over loudspeaker) Now that's what I like to call a hard act to follow. Next up, we have SpongeBob SquarePants.
Fish: Oh, man. I can't wait. I am so stoked on dancing right now.
SpongeBob: Now, before I begin, let me just thank you all for coming out tonight. (Squidward grabs SpongeBob’s mouth)
Squidward: Will you stop it? And let my dancing do the talking.
(dances)
SpongeBob: Wow, Squidward, the crowd's gone silent.
Squidward: Of course they have. They are in the presence of a true artiste.
Fish: What's he doing?
Fish #2: Is he hurt?
Fish #3: I don't know man, but it's hurting my eyes.
Fish #4: I think I'm gonna be sick. (throws up)
SpongeBob: Uh, Squidward?
Squidward: Ha. If they think that's good, wait till they see... (gets a knot in his leg) Cramp! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! (bounces
around on the floor while everyone leaves. A man who was asleep wakes up and is about to walk out the door)
Fish #5: Hey, guys, wait up. Huh? What's this? (sees SpongeBob dancing) That's kind of nice. Hey guys, come check this
out.
Squidward: Must finish dance... on other... (gets another cramp in the other leg)
SpongeBob: Um, Squidward, is this part of the act?
Squidward: (screams) The pain! (crowd cheers and throws flower onto the stage)
Judge #2: By unanimous decision, we have a winner.
Squidward: (grabs the trophy and hugs it) I won, I won!
Judge #2: Never before have I seen such zest, such joie de vivre.
SpongeBob: Oh, thank you, you're too kind. But I couldn't have done it without a very special someone. (grabs Squidward)
Squidward: Wait, SpongeBob, no! (is pulled out from SpongeBob’s body)
Judge #2: The rules clearly state "A single dancer must perform without any further assistance from a partner." Therefore,
you're the winner. (hands trophy to coin balancing dancer)
Fish #6: Oh man, the jig's up, Pedro. We're going home. (rips his wig in half and shows a man inside of it)
Pedro: It's all right, I'll go call a taxi.
Judge #2: Merciful Neptune. Are there any more cheaters?
Fish #7: (takes off the sea horse costume) Ah, crud, we're two dancers.
Octopus: We're nine dancers, actually. (lifts his kilt up to show 9 little ones around his legs)
Fish #8: (takes a muscle fish out of his pants) Does this count?
Judge #2: Isn't there a single dancer here who is not assisted by a partner?
Judge: Uh, what about number 52 over there? (Patrick is screaming and moving around on the ground)
Judge #2: Is he alone?
Judge: Well, let me see. (looks inside Patrick's mouth) Why, yes, he is a single dancer.
Judge #2: Oh, well, then. I guess he wins. (Patrick screams some more as everyone else cheers)
SpongeBob: I love your new dance, Patrick.
Patrick: Thanks.
Narrator: Epilogue.
Mom: Tommy? I've got a fresh load of laundr... (screams as she thinks Tommy is having a seizure on the floor) Tommy, oh,
oh, dear me, no! (dials 911) Hello, it's an emergency! My son! He's...
Tommy: (scoffs) Mom, calm down. (stops music) I'm just doing "the cramp"!
Mom: (hangs up phone) Oh, oh you kids and your carzy dance fads. (she laughs and is soon joined by Mr Krabs, SpongeBob,
Patrick, and Squidward)
Patrick: Hey, everybody, let's all do "the cramp"!
All: Yeah! (everyone dances)Template:Slogan
