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Episode Transcript: Night Light
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==Dialogue== | ==Dialogue== | ||
(The episode launches with Squidward reading at night in his house.) | (The episode launches with Squidward reading at night in his house.) | ||
| − | Squidward: (Reading) "And slowly... Ever so slowly... The ancient crypt door creeps open... And from the festering brine of the darkest darkness, crawled forth monsters of such vile nature, whose appearance was so hideous and threatening, that the author died trying to recount them in this novel!" (Closes the book and shudders.) That story is so scary! But it's only a story, right, clary? (clary is literally stiff with fear. He quakes and falls on his side. Squidward picks him up and puts him into bed next to him.) Why don't you sleep up here tonight, clary? (Silence.) Well, I guess I should turn off the light now. (He does so.) Sure is dark. (He then sees a green violin with its brain protruding from his head in the dark. He gasps, screams and turns the light back on to reveal his chair.) Oh, it's just a chair! I guess I'm imagining things in the dark. (He turns off the light and hears a knocking on his window. He turns to it and sees that there's a shivering music stand) Woah! Another monster! (He turns on his light to reveal it's a green coral branch floating in the current.) Oh, it's just a coral branch. Nothing to be scared of! (He hears a sound as if his door had opened.) What was that?(Turns the light on and off multiple times, seeing musical inturments over and over. The next day, at the Krusty Krab...) | + | *Squidward: (Reading) "And slowly... Ever so slowly... The ancient crypt door creeps open... And from the festering brine of the darkest darkness, crawled forth monsters of such vile nature, whose appearance was so hideous and threatening, that the author died trying to recount them in this novel!" (Closes the book and shudders.) That story is so scary! But it's only a story, right, clary? (clary is literally stiff with fear. He quakes and falls on his side. Squidward picks him up and puts him into bed next to him.) Why don't you sleep up here tonight, clary? (Silence.) Well, I guess I should turn off the light now. (He does so.) Sure is dark. (He then sees a green violin with its brain protruding from his head in the dark. He gasps, screams and turns the light back on to reveal his chair.) Oh, it's just a chair! I guess I'm imagining things in the dark. (He turns off the light and hears a knocking on his window. He turns to it and sees that there's a shivering music stand) Woah! Another monster! (He turns on his light to reveal it's a green coral branch floating in the current.) Oh, it's just a coral branch. Nothing to be scared of! (He hears a sound as if his door had opened.) What was that?(Turns the light on and off multiple times, seeing musical inturments over and over. The next day, at the Krusty Krab...) |
| + | |||
Spongebob:good morning mr krabs | Spongebob:good morning mr krabs | ||
| + | |||
Mr. Krabs: Hey, Spongebob, have you seen Squidward lately ?(At that moment, a very drowsy and tired Ssquidward walks in. We see a close-up of his 5 O' clock shadow, bloodshot eyes, and droopy nose.) | Mr. Krabs: Hey, Spongebob, have you seen Squidward lately ?(At that moment, a very drowsy and tired Ssquidward walks in. We see a close-up of his 5 O' clock shadow, bloodshot eyes, and droopy nose.) | ||
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Squidward:mr krabs i did’nt get enough sleep and now and i give up the Krusty krab | Squidward:mr krabs i did’nt get enough sleep and now and i give up the Krusty krab | ||
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Mr. Krabs: Whoa. You don't look so good, squidward. | Mr. Krabs: Whoa. You don't look so good, squidward. | ||
| + | |||
Squidward: Oh, it's nothing, Mr. Krabs. I just had a rough night. But it's nice and bright today!(He walks into the kitchen and we hear a big clatter from outside. Mr. Krabs bursts through the kitchen door.) | Squidward: Oh, it's nothing, Mr. Krabs. I just had a rough night. But it's nice and bright today!(He walks into the kitchen and we hear a big clatter from outside. Mr. Krabs bursts through the kitchen door.) | ||
| + | |||
Spongebob: whats wrong squidward! What's all this?(We see Squidward running around in circles with a spalula on his hand.) | Spongebob: whats wrong squidward! What's all this?(We see Squidward running around in circles with a spalula on his hand.) | ||
| + | |||
Squidward: Aaahhh!!! The dark! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!(spongebob pulls off the spalula his hand.) | Squidward: Aaahhh!!! The dark! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!(spongebob pulls off the spalula his hand.) | ||
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Spongebob : Get a hold of yourself, squidward.(Squidward is silent, but then blinks and screams.) | Spongebob : Get a hold of yourself, squidward.(Squidward is silent, but then blinks and screams.) | ||
| + | |||
Squidward: Ahhh!!! (Blinks) Ahhh!!!(Blinks) Ahhh!!! Blinks) Ahhh!!!(Blinks) | Squidward: Ahhh!!! (Blinks) Ahhh!!!(Blinks) Ahhh!!! Blinks) Ahhh!!!(Blinks) | ||
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spongebob: What wrong | spongebob: What wrong | ||
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Squidward: (squidward blinks)Ahhh!!!(Blinks)Ahhh!!! Whenever I blink, I see nothing but the darkness! | Squidward: (squidward blinks)Ahhh!!!(Blinks)Ahhh!!! Whenever I blink, I see nothing but the darkness! | ||
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spongebob: Then don't blink squidward it can get any worse. | spongebob: Then don't blink squidward it can get any worse. | ||
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Squidward: Great idea, . Spongebob .(Puts two french fries between his eyelids to prop them open.). Yes, it's working... (His eyes are unable to function properly, and shut. The french fries snap and go flying.)Ahhhh!!! | Squidward: Great idea, . Spongebob .(Puts two french fries between his eyelids to prop them open.). Yes, it's working... (His eyes are unable to function properly, and shut. The french fries snap and go flying.)Ahhhh!!! | ||
| + | |||
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, that's enough! And get back to work laddie squidward needs some time off. HEY SQUIDWARD We've got to make some money Now go in the tilt and get some money. | Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, that's enough! And get back to work laddie squidward needs some time off. HEY SQUIDWARD We've got to make some money Now go in the tilt and get some money. | ||
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Squidward: You want me to go in there?(He points to the tilt. It is dark, and money comes out. We pan in on the money and a live-action human face appears on the coin, holding a flashlight up to itself and laughing while making an irritated expression. It seems to flip around the money titlt. Squidward screams and clings to the kitchen ceiling. Mr. Krabs prys him off and pulls him down.) | Squidward: You want me to go in there?(He points to the tilt. It is dark, and money comes out. We pan in on the money and a live-action human face appears on the coin, holding a flashlight up to itself and laughing while making an irritated expression. It seems to flip around the money titlt. Squidward screams and clings to the kitchen ceiling. Mr. Krabs prys him off and pulls him down.) | ||
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Mr. Krabs: Now, look here squidward . Your work is starting to effect me profits. You need to get some shut-eye. Why don't you get yourself a night light? | Mr. Krabs: Now, look here squidward . Your work is starting to effect me profits. You need to get some shut-eye. Why don't you get yourself a night light? | ||
Squidward: Night light? | Squidward: Night light? | ||
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Mr. Krabs: Yeah, squidward! It'll keep your room lit, so you won't be scared stiff! | Mr. Krabs: Yeah, squidward! It'll keep your room lit, so you won't be scared stiff! | ||
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squidward: Great idea, Mr. Krabs. (That night, Squidward browses Barg 'N' Mart wearing his light pink pajamas and nightcap.)Night light, night light.... Oh! (Sees a whole wall of them in different shapes and colors at the end of an aisle. He sees one that he likes in particular.) Oh, it's beautiful! (He walks up to the cashier, who is a purple, female fish with blonde hair and her employee vest over her pajamas.) Excuse me! Are these night lights guaranteed to keep the creepy creatures of the dark away? | squidward: Great idea, Mr. Krabs. (That night, Squidward browses Barg 'N' Mart wearing his light pink pajamas and nightcap.)Night light, night light.... Oh! (Sees a whole wall of them in different shapes and colors at the end of an aisle. He sees one that he likes in particular.) Oh, it's beautiful! (He walks up to the cashier, who is a purple, female fish with blonde hair and her employee vest over her pajamas.) Excuse me! Are these night lights guaranteed to keep the creepy creatures of the dark away? | ||
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Cashier: If I answer "Yes", will you leave the store sooner?(Cut back to Squidward’s house the same night. He plugs the night light into the outlet, and it illuminates the room slightly with a blue color.) | Cashier: If I answer "Yes", will you leave the store sooner?(Cut back to Squidward’s house the same night. He plugs the night light into the outlet, and it illuminates the room slightly with a blue color.) | ||
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Squidward : Now that I can see... (Jumps up and floats into bed.) Woo-hoo! I can sleep! (He yawns and pulls over the covers. But suddenly, he screams again.) I wonder what's in my dark, scary-looking bathtub! (Screams again and returns to Barg 'N' Mart.) Ahh!!! Night light! Night light! (We see a shot of the cashier, sipping coffee, as Squidward panics and darts to the back of the store. Then, he approaches the camera, night light in hand. He leaves a dollar on the counter.) Oh, thank you, thank you! (At home, he plugs it in and sighs with relief. Then, he screams, seeing that his closet is dark. He runs back to Barg 'N' Mart and we see the same shot as earlier. He runs home and puts a night light in his closet, but notices that his hallway is dark. He runs to and from and to and from Barg 'N' Mart. Then, back at home, we see him plugging in the rest of the night lights.) There, there, there, and there. (Plugs one into an outlet in his medicine cabinet, under his fridge, in his toilet, and the back of his garage.) I've been needing to change your tail light anyways, clary?. (He giggles. We see his whole living room is covered with a wall of millions of night lights.) Now there's not one inch of my house! | Squidward : Now that I can see... (Jumps up and floats into bed.) Woo-hoo! I can sleep! (He yawns and pulls over the covers. But suddenly, he screams again.) I wonder what's in my dark, scary-looking bathtub! (Screams again and returns to Barg 'N' Mart.) Ahh!!! Night light! Night light! (We see a shot of the cashier, sipping coffee, as Squidward panics and darts to the back of the store. Then, he approaches the camera, night light in hand. He leaves a dollar on the counter.) Oh, thank you, thank you! (At home, he plugs it in and sighs with relief. Then, he screams, seeing that his closet is dark. He runs back to Barg 'N' Mart and we see the same shot as earlier. He runs home and puts a night light in his closet, but notices that his hallway is dark. He runs to and from and to and from Barg 'N' Mart. Then, back at home, we see him plugging in the rest of the night lights.) There, there, there, and there. (Plugs one into an outlet in his medicine cabinet, under his fridge, in his toilet, and the back of his garage.) I've been needing to change your tail light anyways, clary?. (He giggles. We see his whole living room is covered with a wall of millions of night lights.) Now there's not one inch of my house! | ||
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clary: yes. | clary: yes. | ||
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Squidward: What was that, clary? | Squidward: What was that, clary? | ||
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clary: i will play music .(Squidward gasps and rolls his eyes, to see his brain in the back of his head.) | clary: i will play music .(Squidward gasps and rolls his eyes, to see his brain in the back of his head.) | ||
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Squidward: You're right, clarry! I've got darkness inside of me!(He turns on two flashlights and sticks them in his eye sockets. Outside his house, the whole thing seems to be glowing orange from all the lights. It wakes Patrick up, and he walks outside.) | Squidward: You're right, clarry! I've got darkness inside of me!(He turns on two flashlights and sticks them in his eye sockets. Outside his house, the whole thing seems to be glowing orange from all the lights. It wakes Patrick up, and he walks outside.) | ||
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Patrick: Squidward's having a party without me? (Walks over to Squidward's house and knocks on the door.) Hmph! Throw a party without your best ? Oh, we'll just see about that.(Squidward opens the door and yanks Patrick inside.) | Patrick: Squidward's having a party without me? (Walks over to Squidward's house and knocks on the door.) Hmph! Throw a party without your best ? Oh, we'll just see about that.(Squidward opens the door and yanks Patrick inside.) | ||
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Squidward: That was close, Patrick! You're safe under these night lights. But you can't go out in the dark, patrick! You don't know what kind of creepy critter could be lurking in those shadows! | Squidward: That was close, Patrick! You're safe under these night lights. But you can't go out in the dark, patrick! You don't know what kind of creepy critter could be lurking in those shadows! | ||
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Patrick: Oh!(Patrick starts shuddering, and runs out. Squidward follows, but gets bounced back be the door, into his chair beside clarry.) | Patrick: Oh!(Patrick starts shuddering, and runs out. Squidward follows, but gets bounced back be the door, into his chair beside clarry.) | ||
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Squidward: Wait, Patrick! (He hear a thundering sound and the ground shakes.) What is that, clarry? (We see Patrick's rock smash through the wall and he slides it into Squidward’s house. clarry climbs on the armrest of Squidwards chair that he's in as it's pushed into the other wall, where it pops. Squidward runs over to Patrick, who is panting and out of breath.) Patrick, what are you doing!?! | Squidward: Wait, Patrick! (He hear a thundering sound and the ground shakes.) What is that, clarry? (We see Patrick's rock smash through the wall and he slides it into Squidward’s house. clarry climbs on the armrest of Squidwards chair that he's in as it's pushed into the other wall, where it pops. Squidward runs over to Patrick, who is panting and out of breath.) Patrick, what are you doing!?! | ||
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Patrick: Oh! I had to move my rock out of the dark and into the light. | Patrick: Oh! I had to move my rock out of the dark and into the light. | ||
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Squidward: You know what that means? (He summersaults into the air and dies a flip. He lands on a neon light that says "Sleepover". Confetti sprinkles from the roof, and Squidwards's tongue rolls out like a noisemaker.) Sleepover! (He jumps down, two sleeping bags in hand. He bows and presents one to Patrick.) Your sleeping bag, sir. | Squidward: You know what that means? (He summersaults into the air and dies a flip. He lands on a neon light that says "Sleepover". Confetti sprinkles from the roof, and Squidwards's tongue rolls out like a noisemaker.) Sleepover! (He jumps down, two sleeping bags in hand. He bows and presents one to Patrick.) Your sleeping bag, sir. | ||
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Patrick: Thank you, my good man.(Both unroll theirs in a regal manner, hop inside each of theirs, and dance to a sea shanty. When they're done, they laugh.) | Patrick: Thank you, my good man.(Both unroll theirs in a regal manner, hop inside each of theirs, and dance to a sea shanty. When they're done, they laugh.) | ||
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Squidward: Oh, Patrick! I'm so glad you made that gaping hole in the wall, letting in all t-t-t-t-t-t... | Squidward: Oh, Patrick! I'm so glad you made that gaping hole in the wall, letting in all t-t-t-t-t-t... | ||
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Both: THE DARK!!!(They both scream and jump out of their sleeping bags. They stand on the other side of Patrick's rock, away from the hole, and under the lights. Meanwhile, at Spongebob’s 's pineapple, the light relfects off of his picture frame, to his vanity-dresser mirror, to his hand-held mirror, and to his skyroof window, where it shines down on his eyes, covered by a sleeping mask. The light laser burns his eyes to a crisp.) | Both: THE DARK!!!(They both scream and jump out of their sleeping bags. They stand on the other side of Patrick's rock, away from the hole, and under the lights. Meanwhile, at Spongebob’s 's pineapple, the light relfects off of his picture frame, to his vanity-dresser mirror, to his hand-held mirror, and to his skyroof window, where it shines down on his eyes, covered by a sleeping mask. The light laser burns his eyes to a crisp.) | ||
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Spongebob : Aaahhhhh!!! BURNING!!!(He cools his eyes with his glass of water on his nightstand. Through his singed, blackened, and charred eyes, he looks out the window to see that it's another one of Squidwards and Patrick's escapades. Back at squidwards house, Squidward and Patrick cling to each other, quivering and shivering.) | Spongebob : Aaahhhhh!!! BURNING!!!(He cools his eyes with his glass of water on his nightstand. Through his singed, blackened, and charred eyes, he looks out the window to see that it's another one of Squidwards and Patrick's escapades. Back at squidwards house, Squidward and Patrick cling to each other, quivering and shivering.) | ||
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Squidward: The darkness, Patrick. I can feel it. Like it's creeping up on us...(Spongebob darts in front of them.) | Squidward: The darkness, Patrick. I can feel it. Like it's creeping up on us...(Spongebob darts in front of them.) | ||
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spongebob: What are you two wimpering about?(Both scream, and Patrick jumps into squidward's mouth for protection.)It's me, Spongebob, you idiots!(Patrick pops out of Squidward's mouth.) | spongebob: What are you two wimpering about?(Both scream, and Patrick jumps into squidward's mouth for protection.)It's me, Spongebob, you idiots!(Patrick pops out of Squidward's mouth.) | ||
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Patrick: Hi, Spongebob! | Patrick: Hi, Spongebob! | ||
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Spongebob: Listen, you guys. I don't care or want to know what you do in your spare time. But could you turn off all these lights? | Spongebob: Listen, you guys. I don't care or want to know what you do in your spare time. But could you turn off all these lights? | ||
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Squidward: But, spongebob! Without our night lights, the creepy creatures of the dar- | Squidward: But, spongebob! Without our night lights, the creepy creatures of the dar- | ||
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Spongebob : Oh, Squidward, there are no creepy creatures of the dark. It's all in your imagination.(Spongebob starts nearing the exit, when Patrick drags behing him, tugging on the back of his pyjamas.) | Spongebob : Oh, Squidward, there are no creepy creatures of the dark. It's all in your imagination.(Spongebob starts nearing the exit, when Patrick drags behing him, tugging on the back of his pyjamas.) | ||
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Patrick: No, Spongebob! Don't go out in the dark! (The back of spongebob’s pyjamas tears off.) Oh, why won't he listen?(Patrick cries over Squidward's shoulder, and Squidwards consoles him by giving him a pat on the back.) | Patrick: No, Spongebob! Don't go out in the dark! (The back of spongebob’s pyjamas tears off.) Oh, why won't he listen?(Patrick cries over Squidward's shoulder, and Squidwards consoles him by giving him a pat on the back.) | ||
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Squidward: Patrick, what if Spongebob's right? What if all this is all in our imagination? | Squidward: Patrick, what if Spongebob's right? What if all this is all in our imagination? | ||
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Patrick: Well, in that case, we'll need even more lights! | Patrick: Well, in that case, we'll need even more lights! | ||
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Squidward: You said it, Pat!(They run outside and return with a huge neon sign.) | Squidward: You said it, Pat!(They run outside and return with a huge neon sign.) | ||
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Patrick: Quick! Turn it on, Squidward! (He does so. The light says "Pinky's Dance Studio" and has mechanical swaying legs with fishnet tights on.) More lights! (They run out and return with a spotlight. Patrick shines it on his face, which causes it to become all nasty and crusty.) Now, Squidward! More lights!(They run to a lighthouse and Patrick tips it over onto Squidward. Then, they carry it into Squidwards's house through the hole Patrick made, and slide it onto Patrick's rock. The whole house is elevated because of this, until it snaps in half and the bottom half lands like normal. We see the top helf is lifted by the lighthouse. The light from it shines on the cracks from the brozen house and into the sky, causing it to look like an "M". Cut to Shady Shoals Rest Home, where superheroes Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy sit on a couch watching TV. Barnacle Boy has dozed off.) | Patrick: Quick! Turn it on, Squidward! (He does so. The light says "Pinky's Dance Studio" and has mechanical swaying legs with fishnet tights on.) More lights! (They run out and return with a spotlight. Patrick shines it on his face, which causes it to become all nasty and crusty.) Now, Squidward! More lights!(They run to a lighthouse and Patrick tips it over onto Squidward. Then, they carry it into Squidwards's house through the hole Patrick made, and slide it onto Patrick's rock. The whole house is elevated because of this, until it snaps in half and the bottom half lands like normal. We see the top helf is lifted by the lighthouse. The light from it shines on the cracks from the brozen house and into the sky, causing it to look like an "M". Cut to Shady Shoals Rest Home, where superheroes Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy sit on a couch watching TV. Barnacle Boy has dozed off.) | ||
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Fish #1: (On TV) The battery-operated spoon has saved me so much time. | Fish #1: (On TV) The battery-operated spoon has saved me so much time. | ||
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Mermaid Man: (Sighs) This is what passes for info-tainment these days? (Sees the "M" light in the air and mistakes it for the "MermaSignal". ) Sweet mother of Neptune's mother! Look, Barnacle Boy! A call to action! To the Invisible Boat Mobile!(Cut to Squidward’s house.) | Mermaid Man: (Sighs) This is what passes for info-tainment these days? (Sees the "M" light in the air and mistakes it for the "MermaSignal". ) Sweet mother of Neptune's mother! Look, Barnacle Boy! A call to action! To the Invisible Boat Mobile!(Cut to Squidward’s house.) | ||
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Patrick: More lights, Squidward! More lights!(They crash into Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy.) | Patrick: More lights, Squidward! More lights!(They crash into Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy.) | ||
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Squidward: Mermaid Man!?! | Squidward: Mermaid Man!?! | ||
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Patrick: Barnacle Boy!?! | Patrick: Barnacle Boy!?! | ||
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Squidward: Aww... Are you here to protect us from the darkness that surrounds us? | Squidward: Aww... Are you here to protect us from the darkness that surrounds us? | ||
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Mermaid Man: squidward We don't have time for your childish games ! We're responding to the distress signal that you sent! | Mermaid Man: squidward We don't have time for your childish games ! We're responding to the distress signal that you sent! | ||
| − | Squidward: I'm sorry, Mermaid Man. There appears to be a misunderstanding. Patrick and I put up those lights to scare away the creepy creatures of the dark! We weren't trying to summon you. | + | |
| + | Squidward: I'm sorry, Mermaid Man. There appears to be a misunderstanding. Patrick and I put up those lights to scare away the creepy creatures of the dark! We weren't trying to summon you | ||
| + | . | ||
Mermaid Man: Oh, fiddlesticks, Squidward. Do you know how hard it is in our... advanced age... to move? Don't shine a giant light in the sky unless there's a real emergency. (Cut to a super villain dressed like a white moth. He cackles, and flutters towards Squidwards's house.) And another thing: What the-!?! (He sees the moth villain.) Dear Neptune! It's the most dangerous and foreboding of all our arch nemesises-- My mortal enemy whom I have searched 57 years for! Come get some, fiend! (The Moth kicks Mermaid Man in the nose, and it throbs and swells.) Come back here, rival!(He becomes weary and heroically naps on Patrick's rock.) | Mermaid Man: Oh, fiddlesticks, Squidward. Do you know how hard it is in our... advanced age... to move? Don't shine a giant light in the sky unless there's a real emergency. (Cut to a super villain dressed like a white moth. He cackles, and flutters towards Squidwards's house.) And another thing: What the-!?! (He sees the moth villain.) Dear Neptune! It's the most dangerous and foreboding of all our arch nemesises-- My mortal enemy whom I have searched 57 years for! Come get some, fiend! (The Moth kicks Mermaid Man in the nose, and it throbs and swells.) Come back here, rival!(He becomes weary and heroically naps on Patrick's rock.) | ||
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Squidwrad: Oh my gosh! Mermaid Man needs assistance! There is no need to fear, AbsorboPants is here!(The Moth flies towards the lighthouse, and Squidwards runs up it, too. The Moth cackles.) | Squidwrad: Oh my gosh! Mermaid Man needs assistance! There is no need to fear, AbsorboPants is here!(The Moth flies towards the lighthouse, and Squidwards runs up it, too. The Moth cackles.) | ||
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The Moth: Savory light, come to me! | The Moth: Savory light, come to me! | ||
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Squidward: Say, let me help you! (He grabs the Moth and locks him inside of the lighthouse window with the light beacon. The Moth flutters around frantically and screams.) Is that enough light for you? (Squidward laughs, then jumps down to the heroes and Patrick.) Well, he's all taken care of. | Squidward: Say, let me help you! (He grabs the Moth and locks him inside of the lighthouse window with the light beacon. The Moth flutters around frantically and screams.) Is that enough light for you? (Squidward laughs, then jumps down to the heroes and Patrick.) Well, he's all taken care of. | ||
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Mermaid Man: Who? | Mermaid Man: Who? | ||
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Squidward: The Moth, silly! You'll be happy to know he won't be going anywhere anytime soon!(At that moment, the Moth pushes up on the lighthouse and flies away, taking squidward's house with him.) | Squidward: The Moth, silly! You'll be happy to know he won't be going anywhere anytime soon!(At that moment, the Moth pushes up on the lighthouse and flies away, taking squidward's house with him.) | ||
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The Moth: See you in another 57 years!(He laughs wickedly as he flutters away.) | The Moth: See you in another 57 years!(He laughs wickedly as he flutters away.) | ||
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Mermaid Man: No!!! | Mermaid Man: No!!! | ||
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Barnacle Boy: I think it's time to go home, Mermaid Man. | Barnacle Boy: I think it's time to go home, Mermaid Man. | ||
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Mermaid Man: Why are we here again? | Mermaid Man: Why are we here again? | ||
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Squidward&patrick: Bye, Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy! | Squidward&patrick: Bye, Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy! | ||
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Mermaid Man: Who are those to hideous creatures of the dark? | Mermaid Man: Who are those to hideous creatures of the dark? | ||
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Barnacle Boy: (Yawning) I'll tell you about it in the morning. Now, drive! | Barnacle Boy: (Yawning) I'll tell you about it in the morning. Now, drive! | ||
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(Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy zoom off in the Invisible Boat Mobile.) | (Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy zoom off in the Invisible Boat Mobile.) | ||
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Squidward: We're all alone, Patrick. No lights. No shelter. | Squidward: We're all alone, Patrick. No lights. No shelter. | ||
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(The two cry and hug each other. Then, it is dawn and the sun rises.) | (The two cry and hug each other. Then, it is dawn and the sun rises.) | ||
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Patrick: Huh? Squidward, there's a really big light! I'll go get it, buddy! | Patrick: Huh? Squidward, there's a really big light! I'll go get it, buddy! | ||
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(He runs up a beam of light to the sun.) | (He runs up a beam of light to the sun.) | ||
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Squidward: Patrick!!! I...(He yawns and falls asleep on Patrick's rock. Then, Patrick comes down from the sun, his tail end flaming.) | Squidward: Patrick!!! I...(He yawns and falls asleep on Patrick's rock. Then, Patrick comes down from the sun, his tail end flaming.) | ||
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Patrick: Ahh!!! Too much light! Too much light! Ahhh!!! | Patrick: Ahh!!! Too much light! Too much light! Ahhh!!! | ||
Revision as of 08:55, 10 July 2008
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| The Original Fry Cook | Rise and Shine |
Episode Article: Night Light
Characters
Dialogue
(The episode launches with Squidward reading at night in his house.)
- Squidward: (Reading) "And slowly... Ever so slowly... The ancient crypt door creeps open... And from the festering brine of the darkest darkness, crawled forth monsters of such vile nature, whose appearance was so hideous and threatening, that the author died trying to recount them in this novel!" (Closes the book and shudders.) That story is so scary! But it's only a story, right, clary? (clary is literally stiff with fear. He quakes and falls on his side. Squidward picks him up and puts him into bed next to him.) Why don't you sleep up here tonight, clary? (Silence.) Well, I guess I should turn off the light now. (He does so.) Sure is dark. (He then sees a green violin with its brain protruding from his head in the dark. He gasps, screams and turns the light back on to reveal his chair.) Oh, it's just a chair! I guess I'm imagining things in the dark. (He turns off the light and hears a knocking on his window. He turns to it and sees that there's a shivering music stand) Woah! Another monster! (He turns on his light to reveal it's a green coral branch floating in the current.) Oh, it's just a coral branch. Nothing to be scared of! (He hears a sound as if his door had opened.) What was that?(Turns the light on and off multiple times, seeing musical inturments over and over. The next day, at the Krusty Krab...)
Spongebob:good morning mr krabs
Mr. Krabs: Hey, Spongebob, have you seen Squidward lately ?(At that moment, a very drowsy and tired Ssquidward walks in. We see a close-up of his 5 O' clock shadow, bloodshot eyes, and droopy nose.)
Squidward:mr krabs i did’nt get enough sleep and now and i give up the Krusty krab
Mr. Krabs: Whoa. You don't look so good, squidward.
Squidward: Oh, it's nothing, Mr. Krabs. I just had a rough night. But it's nice and bright today!(He walks into the kitchen and we hear a big clatter from outside. Mr. Krabs bursts through the kitchen door.)
Spongebob: whats wrong squidward! What's all this?(We see Squidward running around in circles with a spalula on his hand.)
Squidward: Aaahhh!!! The dark! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!(spongebob pulls off the spalula his hand.)
Spongebob : Get a hold of yourself, squidward.(Squidward is silent, but then blinks and screams.)
Squidward: Ahhh!!! (Blinks) Ahhh!!!(Blinks) Ahhh!!! Blinks) Ahhh!!!(Blinks)
spongebob: What wrong
Squidward: (squidward blinks)Ahhh!!!(Blinks)Ahhh!!! Whenever I blink, I see nothing but the darkness!
spongebob: Then don't blink squidward it can get any worse.
Squidward: Great idea, . Spongebob .(Puts two french fries between his eyelids to prop them open.). Yes, it's working... (His eyes are unable to function properly, and shut. The french fries snap and go flying.)Ahhhh!!!
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, that's enough! And get back to work laddie squidward needs some time off. HEY SQUIDWARD We've got to make some money Now go in the tilt and get some money.
Squidward: You want me to go in there?(He points to the tilt. It is dark, and money comes out. We pan in on the money and a live-action human face appears on the coin, holding a flashlight up to itself and laughing while making an irritated expression. It seems to flip around the money titlt. Squidward screams and clings to the kitchen ceiling. Mr. Krabs prys him off and pulls him down.)
Mr. Krabs: Now, look here squidward . Your work is starting to effect me profits. You need to get some shut-eye. Why don't you get yourself a night light? Squidward: Night light?
Mr. Krabs: Yeah, squidward! It'll keep your room lit, so you won't be scared stiff!
squidward: Great idea, Mr. Krabs. (That night, Squidward browses Barg 'N' Mart wearing his light pink pajamas and nightcap.)Night light, night light.... Oh! (Sees a whole wall of them in different shapes and colors at the end of an aisle. He sees one that he likes in particular.) Oh, it's beautiful! (He walks up to the cashier, who is a purple, female fish with blonde hair and her employee vest over her pajamas.) Excuse me! Are these night lights guaranteed to keep the creepy creatures of the dark away?
Cashier: If I answer "Yes", will you leave the store sooner?(Cut back to Squidward’s house the same night. He plugs the night light into the outlet, and it illuminates the room slightly with a blue color.)
Squidward : Now that I can see... (Jumps up and floats into bed.) Woo-hoo! I can sleep! (He yawns and pulls over the covers. But suddenly, he screams again.) I wonder what's in my dark, scary-looking bathtub! (Screams again and returns to Barg 'N' Mart.) Ahh!!! Night light! Night light! (We see a shot of the cashier, sipping coffee, as Squidward panics and darts to the back of the store. Then, he approaches the camera, night light in hand. He leaves a dollar on the counter.) Oh, thank you, thank you! (At home, he plugs it in and sighs with relief. Then, he screams, seeing that his closet is dark. He runs back to Barg 'N' Mart and we see the same shot as earlier. He runs home and puts a night light in his closet, but notices that his hallway is dark. He runs to and from and to and from Barg 'N' Mart. Then, back at home, we see him plugging in the rest of the night lights.) There, there, there, and there. (Plugs one into an outlet in his medicine cabinet, under his fridge, in his toilet, and the back of his garage.) I've been needing to change your tail light anyways, clary?. (He giggles. We see his whole living room is covered with a wall of millions of night lights.) Now there's not one inch of my house!
clary: yes.
Squidward: What was that, clary?
clary: i will play music .(Squidward gasps and rolls his eyes, to see his brain in the back of his head.)
Squidward: You're right, clarry! I've got darkness inside of me!(He turns on two flashlights and sticks them in his eye sockets. Outside his house, the whole thing seems to be glowing orange from all the lights. It wakes Patrick up, and he walks outside.)
Patrick: Squidward's having a party without me? (Walks over to Squidward's house and knocks on the door.) Hmph! Throw a party without your best ? Oh, we'll just see about that.(Squidward opens the door and yanks Patrick inside.)
Squidward: That was close, Patrick! You're safe under these night lights. But you can't go out in the dark, patrick! You don't know what kind of creepy critter could be lurking in those shadows!
Patrick: Oh!(Patrick starts shuddering, and runs out. Squidward follows, but gets bounced back be the door, into his chair beside clarry.)
Squidward: Wait, Patrick! (He hear a thundering sound and the ground shakes.) What is that, clarry? (We see Patrick's rock smash through the wall and he slides it into Squidward’s house. clarry climbs on the armrest of Squidwards chair that he's in as it's pushed into the other wall, where it pops. Squidward runs over to Patrick, who is panting and out of breath.) Patrick, what are you doing!?!
Patrick: Oh! I had to move my rock out of the dark and into the light.
Squidward: You know what that means? (He summersaults into the air and dies a flip. He lands on a neon light that says "Sleepover". Confetti sprinkles from the roof, and Squidwards's tongue rolls out like a noisemaker.) Sleepover! (He jumps down, two sleeping bags in hand. He bows and presents one to Patrick.) Your sleeping bag, sir.
Patrick: Thank you, my good man.(Both unroll theirs in a regal manner, hop inside each of theirs, and dance to a sea shanty. When they're done, they laugh.)
Squidward: Oh, Patrick! I'm so glad you made that gaping hole in the wall, letting in all t-t-t-t-t-t...
Both: THE DARK!!!(They both scream and jump out of their sleeping bags. They stand on the other side of Patrick's rock, away from the hole, and under the lights. Meanwhile, at Spongebob’s 's pineapple, the light relfects off of his picture frame, to his vanity-dresser mirror, to his hand-held mirror, and to his skyroof window, where it shines down on his eyes, covered by a sleeping mask. The light laser burns his eyes to a crisp.)
Spongebob : Aaahhhhh!!! BURNING!!!(He cools his eyes with his glass of water on his nightstand. Through his singed, blackened, and charred eyes, he looks out the window to see that it's another one of Squidwards and Patrick's escapades. Back at squidwards house, Squidward and Patrick cling to each other, quivering and shivering.)
Squidward: The darkness, Patrick. I can feel it. Like it's creeping up on us...(Spongebob darts in front of them.)
spongebob: What are you two wimpering about?(Both scream, and Patrick jumps into squidward's mouth for protection.)It's me, Spongebob, you idiots!(Patrick pops out of Squidward's mouth.)
Patrick: Hi, Spongebob!
Spongebob: Listen, you guys. I don't care or want to know what you do in your spare time. But could you turn off all these lights?
Squidward: But, spongebob! Without our night lights, the creepy creatures of the dar-
Spongebob : Oh, Squidward, there are no creepy creatures of the dark. It's all in your imagination.(Spongebob starts nearing the exit, when Patrick drags behing him, tugging on the back of his pyjamas.)
Patrick: No, Spongebob! Don't go out in the dark! (The back of spongebob’s pyjamas tears off.) Oh, why won't he listen?(Patrick cries over Squidward's shoulder, and Squidwards consoles him by giving him a pat on the back.)
Squidward: Patrick, what if Spongebob's right? What if all this is all in our imagination?
Patrick: Well, in that case, we'll need even more lights!
Squidward: You said it, Pat!(They run outside and return with a huge neon sign.)
Patrick: Quick! Turn it on, Squidward! (He does so. The light says "Pinky's Dance Studio" and has mechanical swaying legs with fishnet tights on.) More lights! (They run out and return with a spotlight. Patrick shines it on his face, which causes it to become all nasty and crusty.) Now, Squidward! More lights!(They run to a lighthouse and Patrick tips it over onto Squidward. Then, they carry it into Squidwards's house through the hole Patrick made, and slide it onto Patrick's rock. The whole house is elevated because of this, until it snaps in half and the bottom half lands like normal. We see the top helf is lifted by the lighthouse. The light from it shines on the cracks from the brozen house and into the sky, causing it to look like an "M". Cut to Shady Shoals Rest Home, where superheroes Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy sit on a couch watching TV. Barnacle Boy has dozed off.)
Fish #1: (On TV) The battery-operated spoon has saved me so much time.
Mermaid Man: (Sighs) This is what passes for info-tainment these days? (Sees the "M" light in the air and mistakes it for the "MermaSignal". ) Sweet mother of Neptune's mother! Look, Barnacle Boy! A call to action! To the Invisible Boat Mobile!(Cut to Squidward’s house.)
Patrick: More lights, Squidward! More lights!(They crash into Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy.)
Squidward: Mermaid Man!?!
Patrick: Barnacle Boy!?!
Squidward: Aww... Are you here to protect us from the darkness that surrounds us?
Mermaid Man: squidward We don't have time for your childish games ! We're responding to the distress signal that you sent!
Squidward: I'm sorry, Mermaid Man. There appears to be a misunderstanding. Patrick and I put up those lights to scare away the creepy creatures of the dark! We weren't trying to summon you . Mermaid Man: Oh, fiddlesticks, Squidward. Do you know how hard it is in our... advanced age... to move? Don't shine a giant light in the sky unless there's a real emergency. (Cut to a super villain dressed like a white moth. He cackles, and flutters towards Squidwards's house.) And another thing: What the-!?! (He sees the moth villain.) Dear Neptune! It's the most dangerous and foreboding of all our arch nemesises-- My mortal enemy whom I have searched 57 years for! Come get some, fiend! (The Moth kicks Mermaid Man in the nose, and it throbs and swells.) Come back here, rival!(He becomes weary and heroically naps on Patrick's rock.)
Squidwrad: Oh my gosh! Mermaid Man needs assistance! There is no need to fear, AbsorboPants is here!(The Moth flies towards the lighthouse, and Squidwards runs up it, too. The Moth cackles.)
The Moth: Savory light, come to me!
Squidward: Say, let me help you! (He grabs the Moth and locks him inside of the lighthouse window with the light beacon. The Moth flutters around frantically and screams.) Is that enough light for you? (Squidward laughs, then jumps down to the heroes and Patrick.) Well, he's all taken care of.
Mermaid Man: Who?
Squidward: The Moth, silly! You'll be happy to know he won't be going anywhere anytime soon!(At that moment, the Moth pushes up on the lighthouse and flies away, taking squidward's house with him.)
The Moth: See you in another 57 years!(He laughs wickedly as he flutters away.)
Mermaid Man: No!!!
Barnacle Boy: I think it's time to go home, Mermaid Man.
Mermaid Man: Why are we here again?
Squidward&patrick: Bye, Mermaid Man & Barnacle Boy!
Mermaid Man: Who are those to hideous creatures of the dark?
Barnacle Boy: (Yawning) I'll tell you about it in the morning. Now, drive!
(Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy zoom off in the Invisible Boat Mobile.)
Squidward: We're all alone, Patrick. No lights. No shelter.
(The two cry and hug each other. Then, it is dawn and the sun rises.)
Patrick: Huh? Squidward, there's a really big light! I'll go get it, buddy!
(He runs up a beam of light to the sun.)
Squidward: Patrick!!! I...(He yawns and falls asleep on Patrick's rock. Then, Patrick comes down from the sun, his tail end flaming.)
Patrick: Ahh!!! Too much light! Too much light! Ahhh!!!
