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Editing Episode Transcript: Accidents Will Happen
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{{Transcript|Accidents Will Happen|Perfect Chemistry|The Other Patty}} | {{Transcript|Accidents Will Happen|Perfect Chemistry|The Other Patty}} | ||
| − | + | {{L|''[Transitions to the Krusty Krab, which is surrounded by boats. In his office, Mr. Krabs is checking his money records. He hears shouting from outside]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Hmmm. Sounds like a mutiny. ''[he goes outside and gasps]'' What the-?! ''[The restaurant is filled with customers shouting angrily]'' What in Neptune's knickers is this?! ''[A customer grabs him]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Customer|Where's the dude in the boat, man? WHERE'S THE DUDE IN THE BOAT!?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Ooooh! You mean Mr. Squidward. ''[he turns and points]'' Well, he's at his post right over the- ''[the wooden boat is empty]'' Where's me cashier?! ''[He looks down at the customer, who's still holding his arm. He glares at him, and pulls his arm away. Mr. Krabs bursts into the kitchen]'' SPONGEBOB! Where in Poseidon's pattyhole is that sorry excuse for a cashier?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|Sorry excuse for a cash-?" Oooooh! You mean Squidward.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[sighs]'' Yes. I mean Squidward. WHERE IS HE?!}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|He's in the storage room. Says he's working on something requiring... ''[in a whisper]'' ...complete privacy.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Oooooh. He requires ''[privacy]'', does he? ''[the sound of a chain snapping is heard, followed by a loud crash. SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs burst into the storage room]'' What's all the ruckus?! ''[A shelf has partially collapsed, and there are buns scattered in a heap all over the floor. Squidward emerges from the pile, rubbing his head and groaning. Mr. Krabs gasps]'' Oh no! Please, no! This is terrible! ''[he bursts into tears]'' Are you hurt?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|Oh, well. Thank you for ask-}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I wasn't talking to you! ''[He picks up some of the buns]'' Don't worry, papa's here. ''[he bursts into tears again]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|Mr. Krabs? ''[Mr. Krabs continues sobbing]'' Mr. Krabs! ''[Mr. Krabs sobs even louder]'' MR. KRABS! ''[he stops sobbing]'' Your shelf collapsed on me, and I twisted my ankle. ''[He lifts up his tentacle, which is badly twisted]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I didn't even know you had ankles.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|As if working here wasn't bad enough, now I've been injured on the job.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Injured? On the job?! Oh no! That would mean...}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|It's all right here, Mr. Krabs.''[Mr. Krabs turns and looks as SpongeBob moves some boxes aside to reveal a poster with "OWS" written on it]'' The Bikini Bottom OWS Worker Safety Guidlines. Let's see, it says here...blah blah blah blah, accident... blah blah blah blah, owner negligence... blah blah blah blah, substantial fines.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Substantial fines?! ''[he turns back to Squidward, laughing nervously]'' You know, Squidward... uh... I can't really let the OWS hear about this, you know. ''[laughs nervously. Squidward smirks]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|Really? Well, maybe I should give them a call. ''[picks up a phone]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Well now, Squidward! ''[laughs nervously]'' Let's not be hasty! ''[Squidward puts down the phone]'' I'll take care of your poor little ankle personally. ''[he turns around]'' SpongeBob! Squidward needs first aid ''[SpongeBob looks delighted]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|First aid? Fear not, injured co-worker, ''[he runs over to Squidward, now wearing a hospital hat and jacket and a stethoscope]'' for I am certified.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|Oh, no no no, don't touch me! ''[SpongeBob grabs Squidward's nose and runs his stethoscope over it]'' SpongeBob, would you mind letting go of my nose?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|Oh, sure. ''[he lets go of Squidward's nose, and it flies back, hitting Squidward]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|Ow! [''he takes the end of SpongeBob's stethoscope and shouts into the end of it''] GET AWAY FROM ME!!!}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[screams]'' Please don't report me to the OWS. I'll do anything. Anything for you.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|Hmm? Anything? ''[cuts to scene where Mr. Krabs lays Squidward down]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Now if you need anything, just let me know.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|I could sure use a pillow.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Ok.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|And another one for my foot. Fluff it.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[angered]'' What did you say?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|I said, "fluff it."}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[mocking tone]'' fluff your pillow, I'll fluff your pillow.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|''[angered]'' What?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Oh nothing.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|And also, looks like you'll have to take over for me.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Well, at least there's not that much customers anyway. ''[anchovies meep]'' Of course. ''[cuts to seen where SpongeBob holds a clipboard.]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|Mr. Krabs, I finished the OWS report. Question 1: Was the accident the cause of criminal negligence. ''[Mr. Krabs screams]'' Mr. Krabs, what is criminal negligence.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|It's what criminals wear when they go to bed. ''[whispering]'m I think Mr. Squidward is hiding something from us, and I want you to figure out what it is.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|Can do, Mr. Krabs.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Shhhh. ''[whispering]'' You gotta keep it a secret from Squidward. ''[Cuts to scene where SpongeBob tries to figure out the cause of the accident]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|Hmm? Huh? If I'm gonna solve this problem, I'm gonna need an assistant. ''[Cuts to scene where Patrick is shown]'' Ok, when you take a bun, I'm gonna hit you with the shelf. ''[Patrick shouts]'' Looks like we'll have to do it again.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Patrick|Uhh, do what again? Ow!}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|Ok, one more time.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Patrick|Ow! ''[cuts to scene where Squidward relaxes on Krusty Krab roof]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|After tea, I'd like a tentacle massage.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I ain't touching your tentacles with a 10-ft ankling.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|''[on phone]'' Hello, I'd like a tentacle massage....''[Mr. Krabs chews on phone]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I'll be right back. How's the solution coming?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|Not happening yet, but we're working on it. ''[Mr. Krabs sighs]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|''[clearing throat]'' I'm waiting!}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|Coming!}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Bill|''[clearing throat]'' Anybody there? Hello?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[angered, muttering]'' Oh, for the love of peat moss.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Bill|Uh aren't you gonna wash your......''[groaning]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|How long do I need to keep this up?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|Oh, it's gonna be a long full recovery. Plus, don't forget about my back barnacles. ''[Mr. Krabs screams & then cries]'' ''[customers mutter in anger]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|OWS Manager|Office Working Society.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[sighs]'' Squidward, after all I've done for you, you've called the OWS.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|SpongeBob|He didn't call him Mr. Krabs, we did. We wanted to find out what the real problem is. Right Patrick?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Patrick|Uh, breakfast, green, Finland. ''[cuts to scene where they all investigate the accident]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|OWS Manager|So, this is where the accident occurred. Would anyone tell me what happened.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|I'll be glad to. ''[in despair]'' I mean, I can live the whole tragic episode, if I must. It was just another day at the Krusty Krab, when suddenly I saw, a patty bun with 10 seeds instead of 11. May I take that?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Bill|What a nice and charming individual.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|But then, I tripped and feel, and then I cried for help. ''[crying]'' Help! Help! But the worst part was that I didn't get that kind gentleman his new bun.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|OWS Manager|Oh, I see. As you know, certain penalties are involved. ''[types random numbers while Mr. Krabs cries]'' One... dollar!}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|''[blinking, gasping]'' NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Oh, Why, why, why?! ''[gasps]'' Hold on a sec. that's my security surveillance camera.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|''[shocked]'' WHAT?!?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I forgot. I borrowed that from the airport. Now, let's see what really happened. ''[Squidward is going to the bun shelf, but what he does is sleep on it, soon the chain breaks and Squidward falls unharmed under the buns, Mr. Krabs gasps]'' You!! Ffffaker. Not to mention that you were sleeping on the job! ''[sighs deeply, forcing Squidward to the ground]''}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|What are you gonna do?}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Mr. Krabs|I'm gonna make you pay.}} | |
| − | + | {{L|Squidward|Oh, no! ''[cuts to scene where Krabs gets pampered. Krabs sighs. Squid gasps. When Squidward starts to pop some of the barnacles on Mr. Krabs back he screams in sorrowness.]''}} | |
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