Editing Episode Transcript: 20,000 Patties Under the Sea

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|align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode Transcript: Pest of the West|Pest of the West]]
 
|align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode Transcript: Pest of the West|Pest of the West]]
|align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode Transcript: The Battle of Bikini Bottom|The Battle of Bikini Bottom]]
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|[[Episode Transcript: The Battle of Bikini Bottom|The Battle of Bikini Bottom]]
 
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Episode Article: [[20,000 Patties Under the Sea (Episode)|20,000 Patties Under the Sea]]
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Episode Article: [[20,000 Patties Under the Sea]]
  
 
==Characters==
 
==Characters==
*[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]
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*[[SpongeBob]]
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]
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*[[Patrick]]
*[[Sheldon J. Plankton|Plankton]]
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*[[Plankton]]
 
*[[Sea Monster]]
 
*[[Sea Monster]]
*[[Eugene H. Krabs|Mr. Krabs]]
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*[[Mr. Krabs]]
*[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]]  
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*[[Squidward]]  
 
*Plankton's customers
 
*Plankton's customers
 
*Mr. Krabs, SpongeBob and Patrick's customers
 
*Mr. Krabs, SpongeBob and Patrick's customers
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==Dialogue==
 
==Dialogue==
(episode begins in Jellyfish Fields)
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(in Jellyfish Fields)
  
'''SpongeBob''': Breaker, breaker outer perimeter, looks clear. Over.
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SpongeBob: Breaker, breaker outer perimeter, looks clear. Over.
  
'''Patrick''': Robert, Robert...uhh...Ronald, Ronald. Ryan.
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Patrick: Robert, Robert...uhh...Ronald, Ronald. Ryan.
  
'''SpongeBob''': Are you sure you're not trying to say Roger?
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SpongeBob: Are you sure your not trying to say Roger?
  
'''Patrick''': Oh, wait I got it. Ringo...
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Patrick: Oh, wait I got it. Ringo...
  
'''SpongeBob''': Patrick, we have visual contact. Now taking evasive action. Subject still in close proximity. Over.
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SpongeBob: Patrick, we have visual contact. Now taking evasive action. Subject still in close proximity. Over.
  
'''Patrick''': Hello?
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Patrick: Hello?
  
'''SpongeBob''': Please reply.
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SpongeBob: Please reply.
  
'''Patrick''': I wonder if I can order pizza with these things.
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Patrick: I wonder if I can order pizza with these things.
  
'''SpongeBob''': Please, contact imminent Patrick. (nervously) Respond now. Please. Please!
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SpongeBob: Contact immanent Patrick. Respond now. Please. Please!
  
'''Patrick''': (unable to hear SpongeBob properly) SpongeBob, you're going to need to speak up. My eardrums aren't what they used to be.
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Patrick: SpongeBob, you're going to need to speak up. My eardrums aren't what they used to be.
  
'''SpongeBob''': (trying to stifle his panic) But I can't speak up, Patrick. There's a jellyfish over here and I'm worried it might sting me if I make any loud... (bumps Patrick, who screams; disappointed) ...noises.  
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SpongeBob: But I can't speak up Patrick, there's a jellyfish here and I'm worried it might sting me if I make any loud... (SpongeBob bumps Patrick and he screams)... noises.  
  
'''Patrick''': Oops. (they run away. The jellyfish shrugs it off)
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Patrick: Oops. (they run away. The jellyfish shrugs it off.)
  
'''SpongeBob''': Is he still after us, Patrick?
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SpongeBob: Is he still after us, Patrick?
  
'''Patrick''': I don't know, buddy.
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Patrick: I don't know, buddy.
  
'''SpongeBob''': Should we turn around and check?
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SpongeBob: Should we turn around and check?
  
'''Patrick''': OK. (they trip over something)
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Patrick: Ok. (they trip over something)
  
'''SpongeBob''': Oh, I think I landed on my pain center.
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SpongeBob: Oh, I think I landed on my pain center.
  
'''Patrick''': I think I landed on a rock.
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Patrick: I think I landed on a rock.
  
'''SpongeBob''': Patrick, look! There's a weird thing sticking out of the ground right there.
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SpongeBob: Patrick, look! There's a weird thing sticking out of the ground right there.
  
'''Patrick''': That's just Squidward sunbathing again. (Squidward lowers down his sunglasses)
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Patrick: That's just Squidward sunbathing again. (Squidward lowers down his sunglasses)
  
'''SpongeBob''': No, not that, Patrick. This!
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SpongeBob: No, not that, Patrick. This!
  
'''Patrick''': What is it?
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Patrick: What is it?
  
'''SpongeBob''': I don't know. I think there's something buried underneath it. And I'm gonna go get some shovels so we can dig it up.
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SpongeBob: I don't know, Patrick. I think there's something buried underneath it. And I'm gonna go get some shovels so we can dig it up.
  
'''Patrick''': We? (bubble-wipe to large piles of dirt)
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Patrick: We?
  
'''SpongeBob''': Phew! Nothing like a little manual labor to put some hair on your chest, eh, Patrick?
+
(cut to large piles of dirt)
  
'''Patrick''': I'll say. (his entire chest is covered with hair)
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SpongeBob: Phew! Nothing like a little manual labor to put some hair on your chest, eh, Patrick?
  
'''SpongeBob''': Plus, look at what we unearthed! A UFO! (look inside) Go on, you first. (Patrick climbs down a ladder) Kinda dark, huh?
+
Patrick: I'll say. (his entire chest is covered with hair)
  
'''Patrick''': Yeah, dark.
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SpongeBob: Plus, look at what we unearthed! A UFO! (look inside) Go on, you first. (Patrick climbs down a ladder) Kinda dark, isn't it?
  
'''SpongeBob''': Well, there has to be a light switch around here somewhere. Found it. Excuse me, sir. (pulls off a skeleton and proceeds to start the submarine) Hey, Patrick, look! We're moving! And here's the steering wheel!
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Patrick: Yeah, dark.
  
'''Patrick''': Hold it, SpongeBob. You better let me drive.
+
SpongeBob: Well, there has to be a light switch around here somewhere. Found it. Excuse me, sir. (pulls off a skeleton and proceeds to start the submarine) Hey, Patrick, look! We're moving! And here's the steering wheel!
  
'''SpongeBob''': Gimme that wheel!
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Patrick: Hold it there, SpongeBob. You better let me drive.
  
'''Patrick''': No! Let go! I wanna drive! (the submarine goes crazy. Bubble-wipe to the Krusty Krab)
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SpongeBob: Gimme that wheel!
  
'''Mr. Krabs''': I don't understand, Squidward. Where are all the customers? I know the Krusty Krab isn't Bikini Bottom's most prostegious eatery, but at least it's better than that salty old Chum Bucket across the street. And that's our only competition.
+
Patrick: No! Let go! I wanna drive! (the submarine goes crazy)
  
'''Squidward''': Am I getting paid extra for this conversation?
+
(scene cuts to the Krusty Krab)
  
'''Mr. Krabs''': Oh, come on, Squidward. Can't you just pretend to listen just for once in your life? Do it for old Mr. Krabs.
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Mr. Krabs: I don't understand, Squidward. Where are all the customers? I know the Krusty Krab isn't Bikini Bottom's most prostegious eatery, but at least it's better than that salty old Chum Bucket across the street. And that's our only competition.
  
'''Squidward''': Well, since you can't bring any customers into the Krusty Krab, have you ever thought about bringing the Krusty Krab to the customers?
+
Squidward: Am I getting paid extra for this conversation?
  
'''Mr. Krabs''': Quiet, Squidward, I'm brainstorming! Ooh, ooh! What if instead of bringing customers to the Krusty Krab, we could bring the Krusty Krab to the customers?
+
Mr. Krabs: Oh, come on, Squidward. Can't you pretend to listen for just once in your life? Do it for old Mr. Krabs.
  
'''Squidward''': La la la la la la la la la la la la.
+
Squidward: Well, since you can't bring any customers into the Krusty Krab, have you ever thought about bringing the Krusty Krab to the customers?
  
'''Mr. Krabs''': Yes, of course! But how? (the submarine crashes into the Krusty Krab)
+
Mr. Krabs: Quiet, Squidward, I'm brainstorming! Ooh, ooh! What if instead of bringing customers to the Krusty Krab, we could bring the Krusty Krab to the customers?
  
'''SpongeBob''': Can we park here? Hey, Mr. Krabs! Look what Patrick and I found! We're gonna use it to go on a long journey.
+
Squidward: La la la la la la la la la la la la la.
  
'''Patrick''': Or even around the block!
+
Mr. Krabs: Yes, of course! But how? (the submarine crashes into the Krusty Krab)
  
'''Mr. Krabs''': That's it! We'll take the Krusty Krab on the road. (cut to outside) So long, lad. Make me lots of money!
+
SpongeBob: Can we park here? Hey, Mr. Krabs! Look what Patrick and I found! We're gonna use it to go on a long journey.
  
'''SpongeBob''': Bye, Squidward. Bye, Mr. Krabs. (dreamily) Bye, Squidward.
+
Patrick: Or even around the block!
  
'''Patrick''': You said "Bye, Squidward" twice.
+
Mr. Krabs: That's it! We'll take the Krusty Krab on the road. (cut to outside) So long, boys. Make me lots of money!
  
'''SpongeBob''': I like Squidward.  
+
SpongeBob: Bye, Squidward. Bye, Mr. Krabs. (dreamily) Bye, Squidward.  
  
'''Plankton''': (looking through a telescope) A traveling restaurant, eh? It's not fair! I had that idea years ago! No matter. If Mr. Krabs wants to play dirty, then Plankton's ready for his turn to take... his turn. (laughs and turns the fist from the Chum Bucket building into a flying vehicle)
+
Patrick: You said "Bye, Squidward" twice.
  
'''SpongeBob''': Hello!
+
SpongeBob: I like Squidward.
  
'''Man''': Hello.
+
Plankton: (looking through a telescope) A traveling restaurant, eh? It's not fair! I had that idea years ago! No matter. If Mr. Krabs wants to play dirty, then Plankton's ready for his turn to take his turn. (laughs and turns the fist from the Chum Bucket building into a flying vehicle)
  
'''SpongeBob''': Could I interest you in a Krabby Patty?
+
SpongeBob: Hello!
  
'''Man''': No thanks.
+
Con Man: Hello.
  
'''Patrick''': Now what?
+
SpongeBob: Could I interest you in a Krabby Patty?
  
'''SpongeBob''': I don't know, Patrick. Mr. Krabs said if we didn't find customers, not to come back. (to Con Man) Uh, are you sure you don't want to be out first customer, sir?
+
Con Man: No thanks.
  
'''Man''': Yeah, I'm pretty sure. (walks away)
+
Patrick: Now what?
  
'''SpongeBob''': Wait! We'll pay you!
+
SpongeBob: I don't know, Patrick. Mr. Krabs said if we didn't find customers, not to come back. (to Con Man) Uh, are you sure you don't want to be out first customer.
  
'''Man''': Hey, thanks again, you guys. Good luck with the restaurant!
+
Con Man: Yeah, I'm pretty sure. (walks away)
  
'''SpongeBob''': Thank you, very much sir, come again soon!
+
SpongeBob: Wait! We'll pay you!
  
'''Plankton''': Those nincompoops are better salesmen than I suspected. (an alarm sets off)
+
Con Man: Hey, thanks again, guys. Good luck with the restaurant!
  
'''Voice''': Customer approaching.
+
SpongeBob: Thank you, sir, come again!
  
'''Plankton''': Hello, little boy. Would you like a chum burger?
+
Plankton: Those nincompoops are better salesmen than I suspected. (an alarm sets off)
  
'''Boy''': Uh, does it come in raspberry?
+
Voice: Customer approaching.
  
'''Plankton''': Um, no.
+
Plankton: Hello, little boy. Would you like a chum burger?
  
'''Boy''': Blueberry?
+
Boy: Uh, does it come in raspberry?
  
'''Plankton''': (angrily) No.
+
Plankton: Um, no.
  
'''Boy''': Uh...raspberry?
+
Boy: Blueberry?
  
'''Plankton''': Ah, come on, kid. You asked me that already! Now quit wasting my time!!
+
Plankton: No.
  
'''Lady Fish''': Hey, you can't talk to my son that way! Who do you think you are?
+
Boy: Uh...raspberry?
  
'''Plankton''': I'm Plankton, you old hag. And your son smells like boogers!  
+
Plankton: Ah, come on, kid. You asked me that already. Now quit wasting my time!
  
'''Man Fish''': Hey, you can't talk about my wife that way! What do you think this is?!
+
Lady Fish: Hey, you can't talk to my son that way! Who do you think you are?
  
'''Plankton''': It's time for you to lose some weight fatty! That's what this is.
+
Plankton: I'm Plankton, you old hag. And your son smells like boogers.  
  
'''Grandma''': Hey, you can't talk about my grandson like that! Somebody oughta put you in a mental hospital.
+
Man Fish: Hey, you can't talk about my wife that way. What do you think this is?
  
'''Plankton''': Somebody should put you in a box floating down the river, Grandma!
+
Plankton: I think it's time for you to lose some weight, fatty. That's what this is.
  
'''Grandma''': You're probably right.
+
Grandma: You can't talk about my grandson like that. Someone oughta put you in a mental hospital.
  
'''Plankton''': You people are crazy. I'm getting out of here. (people start throwing rocks) What the? No! Controls malfunctioning!
+
Plankton: Someone should put you in a box floating down the river, Grandma.
  
'''SpongeBob''': Hey, Patrick.
+
Grandma: You're probably right.
  
'''Patrick''': Yeah?
+
Plankton: You people are crazy. I'm getting out of here. (people start throwing rocks) What the? No! Controls malfunctioning!
  
'''SpongeBob''': Weren't you supposed to be on kitchen duty? (cut to the kitchen, where the patties are burnt) Oh, no. You burnt all the patties. It's hard as a rock. How are we going to find someone who would buy these?
+
SpongeBob: Hey, Patrick.
  
'''Man Fish''': Hey, the rocks are all gone.
+
Patrick: Yeah?
  
'''Crowd''': Aww! (Plankton smiles)
+
SpongeBob: Weren't you supposed to be on kitchen duty? (cut to the kitchen, where the patties are burnt) Oh, no. You burnt all the patties. It's hard as a rock. How are we gonna find someone who would buy these?
  
'''SpongeBob''': Folks, have I got a deal for you. (the crowd sees the hard patties. They buy them and proceed to hit Plankton with them)
+
Man Fish: Hey, the rocks are all gone.
  
'''Jack''': Alright, let's get him!
+
Crowd: Aww! (Plankton smiles)
  
'''SpongeBob''': Mr. Krabs is going to be so proud of us when he finds out how good we're doing. Did you see any new customers, Patrick?
+
SpongeBob: Folks, have I got a deal for you. (the crowd sees the hard patties. they buy them and proceed to hit Plankton with them)
  
'''Patrick''': No, but I see a sign. It says. "Warning: Ab... eyes?"
+
Jack: Alright, get him!
  
'''SpongeBob''': Let me see. (looks through periscope) No, Patrick, that says "Abyss."
+
SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs is gonna be so proud of us when he sees how good we're doing. See any new customers, Patrick?
  
'''Patrick''': OK. What's an abyss, SpongeBob?
+
Patrick: No, but I see a sign. It says. "Warning: Ab... eyes?"
  
'''SpongeBob''': An abyss is a bottomless... (the submarine falls down the abyss) ...chasm! (an alarm goes off) Pat, we're falling!
+
SpongeBob: Let me see. (looks through periscope) No, Patrick, that says "Abyss."
  
'''Patrick''': And now we're being bathed in an eerie red light!
+
Patrick: OK. What's an abyss, SpongeBob?
  
'''Plankton''': (sees it falling) Yes! Yes!
+
SpongeBob: An abyss is a bottomless...(the submarine falls down the abyss)...chasm! (an alarm goes off) Pat, we're falling!
  
'''Patrick''': And now a deafening warning siren! (SpongeBob imitates the sound. the submarine hits a sludgy item, which turns out to be the head of the Sea Monster. It shouts)
+
Patrick: And now we're being bathed in an eerie red light!
  
'''SpongeBob''': Look, Patrick! We've floated back up, out of the deep, dark, depressing, horrible abyss! (looks at the Sea Monster)
+
Plankton: (sees it falling) Yes! Yes!
  
'''Sea Monster''': Hey! Who are you calling dark and depressing?
+
Patrick: And now a deafening warning siren! (SpongeBob imitates the sound. the submarine hits a sludgy item, which turns out to be the head of the Sea Monster)
  
'''SpongeBob''': We didn't mean it that way, Mr. Sea Monster, sir! What we really want to know is... are you hungry?
+
Sea Monster: (shouts)
  
'''Sea Monster''': Hungry? I've been asleep for 79 years. Which means my last meal was 79 years ago. Yes, I'm hungry.
+
SpongeBob: Look, Patrick! We've floated back up, out of the deep, dark, depressing, horrible abyss! (looks at the Sea Monster)
  
'''SpongeBob''': Then try one of our Krabby Patties.
+
Sea Monster: Hey! Who are you calling dark and depressing?
  
'''Sea Monster''': Mmm! That's the best thing I've tasted since that sewer spill...back in '76. I'll take 640 of them.
+
SpongeBob: We didn't mean it that way, Mr. Sea Monster, sir! What we really wanna know is... are you hungry?
  
'''SpongeBob''' and '''Patrick''': Woo hoo!
+
Sea Monster: Hungry? I've been asleep for 79 years. Which means my last meal was 79 years ago. Yes, I'm hungry.
  
'''Patrick''': Order...uh...up. (the Sea Monster gives them large wads of cash)
+
SpongeBob: Then try one of our Krabby Patties.
  
'''Plankton''': Now that those two are out of the picture, all of the customers will come running to me. (looks at the Sea Monster paying them) This calls for drastic, uh.. rish... measures! Okay, you bums, time for the second course; Chum Charges!
+
Sea Monster: Mmm! That's the best thing I've tasted since that sewer spill...back in '76. I'll take 640 of them.
  
'''Patrick''': SpongeBob! Our hull's been breached. Do you know what that means?
+
SpongeBob and Patrick: Woo hoo!
  
'''SpongeBob''': No!
+
Patrick: Order...uh...up. (the Sea Monster gives them large wads of cash)
  
'''Patrick''': Neither do I!
+
Plankton: Now that those two are out of the picture, all of the customers will come running to me. (looks at the Sea Monster paying them) This calls for drastic measures! Okay, you bums, time for the second course; Chum Charges!
  
'''Plankton''': Yes! I sunk the Krusty Krab! I sunk the Krusty Krab! I sunk the... (the vehicle crashes into a cavern wall) Ah, who needs that Rust Bucket anyhow? (takes out a parachute)
+
Patrick: SpongeBob! Our hull's been breached. Do you know what that means?
  
'''Sea Monster''': Come on in there! I want more sandwiches!  
+
SpongeBob: No!
  
'''Patrick''': (a piece of chum enters) SpongeBob, look!
+
Patrick: Neither do I!
  
'''SpongeBob''': What is it?
+
Plankton: Yes! I sunk the Krusty Krab! I sunk the Krusty Krab! I sunk the...(the vehicle crashes into a cavern wall) Ah, who needs that Rust Bucket anyhow.
  
'''Patrick''': It's a liquid.
+
Sea Monster: Come on in there! I want more sandwiches!
  
'''SpongeBob''': No, it's a solid! It's a solid!
+
Patrick: (a piece of chum enters) SpongeBob, look!
  
'''SpongeBob and Patrick''': It's a "lol-squid."
+
SpongeBob: What is it?
  
'''Sea Monster''': All right, what's going on in there? Hey, that looks like a sandwich to me!
+
Patrick: It's a liquid.
  
'''SpongeBob''': But not just a sandwich. It's a...Chumwich.
+
SpongeBob: No, it's a solid! It's a solid!
  
'''Sea Monster''': (eats it) Mmm! Now that's a sandwich! (bubble-wipe to a sequence of SpongeBob making Chumwiches, Patrick collecting the Chum, and the Sea Monster paying them for the Chumwiches)
+
SpongeBob and Patrick: It's a "lol-squid."
  
'''SpongeBob''': Anything else before we shove off?
+
Sea Monster: All right, what's going on in there? Hey, that looks like a sandwich to me!
  
'''Sea Monster''': I want dessert!
+
SpongeBob: But not just a sandwich. It's a...Chumwich.
  
'''SpongeBob''': We don't have desserts.
+
Sea Monster: (eats it) Mmm! Now that's a sandwich!
  
'''Plankton''': (lands from his parachute) Don't give another penny to those fast-food phonies. That's right, they stole my idea. My, my, my... (falls down and rolls into some mud)
+
(cut to a sequence of SpongeBob making Chumwiches, Patrick collecting the Chum, and the Sea Monster paying them for the Chumwiches)
  
'''Sea Monster''': Hey, a chocolate eclair! Now that looks like dessert to me!
+
SpongeBob: Anything else before we shove off?
  
'''Plankton''': No! No, no, no, no! You've got it all wrong, see... Hey! (the Sea Monster chases Plankton. Bubble-wipe to the Krusty Krab)
+
Sea Monster: I want dessert!
  
'''Janitor''': (repairing the windows SpongeBob and Patrick broke previously) There you are, Mr. Krabs, just like new again.
+
SpongeBob: We don't have desserts.
  
'''Squidward''': Now all we have to do is keep SpongeBob away from the-- (the submarine crashes into the windows. Janitor looks disappointedly at the window)
+
Plankton: (lands from his parachute) Don't give another penny to those fast-food phonies. That's right, they stole my idea. My, my, my...(falls down and rolls into some mud)
  
'''SpongeBob''': We're back, Mr. Krabs!
+
Sea Monster: Hey, a chocolate eclair! Now that looks like dessert to me!
  
'''Mr. Krabs''': Tell me all about it. Please, tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me!
+
Plankton: No! No, no, no, no! You've got it all wrong, see... Hey! (the Sea Monster chases Plankton)
  
'''SpongeBob''': You wouldn't believe it, we had so many new customers!
+
(cut to the Krusty Krab)
  
'''Mr. Krabs''': I don't really care about that. Tell me about the money.
+
Janitor: (repairing the windows SpongeBob and Patrick broke previously) There you are, Mr. Krabs, just like new again.
  
'''SpongeBob''': There we were at the bottom of a deep, dark, abyss. And we had to let go of something heavy.
+
Squidward: Now all we have to do is keep SpongeBob away from the...(the submarine crashes into the windows)
  
'''Patrick''': And paper.
+
SpongeBob: We're back, Mr. Krabs!
  
'''Mr. Krabs''': You let go of all the money I earned as ballast?
+
Mr. Krabs: Tell me all about it. Please, tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me!
  
'''SpongeBob''': (he and Patrick nod their heads) But on the bright side, we did manage to bring back 37,000 pounds of these decorative deep sea rocks! (opens the submarine door. Several colorful "sea rocks" fall out)
+
SpongeBob: You wouldn't believe it, we had so many new customers!
 +
 
 +
Mr. Krabs: I don't care about that. Tell me about the money.
 +
 
 +
SpongeBob: There we were at the bottom of a deep, dark, abyss. And we had to let go of something heavy.
 +
 
 +
Patrick: And paper.
 +
 
 +
Mr. Krabs: You let go of all the money I earned as ballast?
 +
 
 +
SpongeBob: (he and Patrick nod their heads) But on the bright side, we did manage to bring back 37,000 pounds of these decorative deep sea rocks!
 +
 
 +
{{Transcripts/Season 5}}
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 +
{{Slogan}}
  
{{Transcripts/Season 5 Ver. 2}}
 
 
[[Category:Transcript]]
 
[[Category:Transcript]]
 
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 5]]
 
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 5]]

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