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Transcript: The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie/Part 5
Dialogue
Chapter 33:Alive
SpongeBob: Hey, we're alive! (The pirates cheer and people cheer as the back to movie to show SpongeBob and Patrick) Let's get that crown.
Patrick: Right. (He and Sponge rush over to the crown and get ready to pick it up)
SpongeBob: On three, Patrick. Ready? One, two, three. (Scuba diver picks up crown) Hey, it's lighter than I thought. Huh?
SpongeBob and Patrick: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Cyclops: ROOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(The camera pulls up to reveal that the Scuba diver is the one that picked it up. Suddenly, all of the sea creatures in the room begin to shake and come back to life because of the water sprinklers)
Chapter 34: Cyclops holding the King's Crown/The bag of Winds
Patrick: What's happening?
SpongeBob: I don't know. Look! (1,007 sea creatures, Including Mr. Puff, The Spanish band, the seahorses and three of Patrick's relatives reanimate. Some Octopuses/Jellyfish three Lobsters that bear a strong resemblance to Mr. Krabs, Squirt Glue And at the Scuba diver and the other sea creatures attack the Scuba diver and SpongeBob and Pat escape) Come on, Patrick. Let's get this crown back to Bikini Bottom. (The two carry the crown outside to the beach)
SpongeBob: Do you still have that bag of winds?
Patrick: I sure do. (Patrick shows a lump on his butt) Here you go. (Pulls out the bag. SpongeBob stares at him, wide-eyed) What?
SpongeBob: Nothing, nothing... Okay, let's go over the instructions. (Reads the paper with the instructions on it) Let's see, it says here, "Step one: Point bag away from home. "
Patrick: OK. (Points bag at Shell City)
SpongeBob: "Step two: Plant feet firmly on ground. "
Patrick: Right! (Plants his feet in the sand)
SpongeBob: "Step three: Remove string from bag, releasing the winds. "
Patrick: Check. (Pulls the string tied around the bag, and the bag flies out of his arm)
SpongeBob: Well, that seems simple enough. Point bag away from home, feet firmly on ground, pull string, releasing the winds. All right, let's do it for real.
Patrick: Uh, SpongeBob?
SpongeBob: No, no, stop! (He chases after the bag)
Patrick: I was bad, I'm sorry!
SpongeBob: Please, bag.
Patrick: I'm sorry, I just thought... It was a mistake!
SpongeBob: Oh, no. How will we ever get back to Bikini Bottom now?
Chapter 35:The S.S David
David Hasselhoff: (first lines) I can take you there. (Sponge and Pat spot David Hasselhoff running towards them)
SpongeBob: Who are you?
David Hasselhoff: I'm David Hasselhoff.
SpongeBob and Patrick: Hooray!
SpongeBob: So where's your boat?
David Hasselhoff: Boat? (He laughs heartily)
(The next scene depicts SpongeBob and Patrick riding toward Bikini Bottom)
SpongeBob: Go, Hasselhoff!
Patrick: Next stop, Bikini Bottom.
Chapter 36:The Day That Krabs Fries
(The scene back at the Bikini Bottom as the scene Plankton's slaves are still under control)
Bikini Bottom Residents: All hail Plankton. All hail Plankton.
(Inside the Krusty Krab 2, Plankton is walking in)
Peep: Well, Krabs, you know what today is? (Looks at calendar. The date is wrong) Sorry about this, calendar. (Changes it) March 14th. Wait, that's not right. It should say "The day that Krabs fries!" (Looks out the window and sees King Neptune and Princess Mindy arrive) Oooh! Guess who's here.
Chapter 37:Return of the Angry Assassin
(Above the ocean)
David Hasselhoff: (swimming with SpongeBob and Patrick)
(The scene changes to guy on the boat and Hasselhoff keep swimming)
Guy: Whoa. (falls down on the water)
(The scene cut of Hasselhoff keep swimming toward Bikini Bottom)
SpongeBob: Hooray for Hasselhoff! Nothing can stop us now.
Patrick: Unidentified object off the hindquarters.
SpongeBob: It looks like... (The diver's boot emerges from the ocean)
SpongeBob: Bigger boot. But how? (The boot stops behind Hasselhoff’s foot. It lifts back to reveal a smudged, green blob, very similar to Plankton earlier when he got stepped on by SpongeBob. From it, Dennis reforms, his sunglasses smashed through, his teeth sharp and his clothes ripped. Then, he peels himself off and lands on Hasselhoff's foot.) Ah! Dennis!
Dennis: (smiles in an evil manner) Did you miss me?
Chapter 38:Stalling
(At the Krusty Krab 2, Neptune and Mindy arrive)
Plankton: (He has popcorn and a drink with him. He is sitting on a small chair) This is the best seat in the house. All right, Neptune, let's get it on!
Neptune: Eugene Krabs, your six-day reprieve is up, and it is time for you to die.
Mr. Krabs: (Krabs is rapidly sweating mounds of ice cubes) Please, I didn't do it!
Neptune: There is nothing else I can do.
Mindy: You can give SpongeBob and Patrick a little more time.
Neptune: Except give SpongeBob and Patrick a little more time... (muttering) What? (Realizes what he just said, then turns to Mindy) Mindy!!! Will you butt out?! I won't have you stalling this execution.
Mindy: Stalling? I'm not stalling anything.
Neptune: Yes, you are.
Mindy: No, I'm not.
Neptune: Yes, you are. You're doing it right now.
Mindy: I'm stalling.
Neptune: Yes.
Mindy: Stalling?
Neptune: Stalling!
Mindy: Stalling.
Neptune: Stalling!
Plankton: Oh, boy.
Chapter 39:The REAL boat battle
(Back above the ocean, Dennis has appeared. He takes off his smashed through shades and throws them in the sea.)
Dennis: Now, where were we?
SpongeBob: Patrick, run!
Patrick: No, I'm tired of running. If we run now, we'll never stop... (Dennis throws Patrick towards Hasselhoff's feet) Run, SpongeBob! (SpongeBob runs. Dennis pulls out a knife, which he accidentally stabs Hasselhoff in the butt with.)
David Hasselhoff: Ooh. Take it easy back there, fellas.
(SpongeBob tries run from Dennis, but he's coming closer and closer.)
Patrick: SpongeBob, be careful.
Dennis: Come on, kid, give it up. Dennis always gets his man.
SpongeBob: Never!!!!!!! (Jumps to Hasselhoff's other foot dramatically) Yeah! I did it!
Dennis: You got guts, kid. Too bad I gotta rip them out of you.
SpongeBob: I don't know what Plankton's paying you,(Takes out a pile of Goober Dollars) but if you let us go, I can make it worth your while. (Dennis swipes the dollars)
Dennis: It's gonna take a lot more than five...(looks at the dollars) What is this?
SpongeBob: Uh, That, sir, is five Goober Dollars. Legal tender at any participating Goofy Goober (throws the dollars away and grabs SpongeBob)... I got bubbles. Fun at parties. (sprays soapy bubbles into Dennis' eyes which causes them to swell up and go red.)
Dennis: My eyes! (Throws SpongeBob)
Patrick: I got you, SpongeBob! (Catches him)
SpongeBob: Thanks, buddy. (Dennis threatens to squish them) Uh, thanks a lot.
Dennis: (Last lines) That's it! I'm through messing around! See you later, fools! (sees the boat) Huh? AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
Patrick: (Dennis suddenly crashes with a floating sailboat and falls into the ocean) See ya.
Chapter 40:End of the stalling
(Inside the Krusty Krab 2)
Mindy: So you think....I'm....stalling.
Neptune: Aaaaaagggghhhhh! Where am I, in crazy town? I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS NONSENSE!! (Bowser) You are to wait in the carriage until the execution is done!!
Mindy: But, Daddy...
Neptune: NOW!!! (She gets on the elevator and press the floor button. Neptune closes the elevator)
Mindy: (In a Sprixie Princess voice) HELP!!! Oh, SpongeBob, wherever you are, you better hurry.
Chapter 41:It's not too late to go to Bikini Bottom
(Back above the ocean, Hasselhoff swim to Bikini Atoll)
Hasselhoff: (Stand up) Okay, fellas, this is where you get off. Bikini Bottom's directly below.
SpongeBob: But we'll never be able to float down in time.
Hasselhoff: Who said anything about floating? (Pecs turn into launchers)
Announcer: Initiating launch sequence.
SpongeBob and Patrick: What the...? (All systems are green in the chest)
SpongeBob: Did you see that?
Patrick: The control.
Hasselhoff: All hands on deck.
Announcer: 10 seconds to liftoff, 9, 8...
(The Sea starts to shake)
Chapter 42:Help!
Neptune: (Lights his trident) Eugene Krabs, the time has come...
Mindy: (Outside) No.
Plankton: Yes.
Announcer: ...7, 6, 5...
Neptune: ....for you....
Mindy: (Outside) No!
Plankton: (Pulls Antennae) Yes!
Announcer: ...4, 3, 2...
Neptune: ....to fry!
Mindy: (Outside) Noooo!!!
Plankton: (Wide-eyed) YES!!!
Announcer: ... one. (SpongeBob, Patrick, and the crown are launched in the ocean and back down to Bikini Bottom.)
Chapter 43: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Spongebob and Patrick: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
Mr. Krabs: NO! (Just then, Sponge and Pat fall through the roof. Krabs is about to be fried, but the crown blocks the ray, and it is blasted up to land, where Hasselhoff is lying down)
Hasselhoff: (Last lines) You done good, Hasselhoff. You done... (He is blasted with Neptune's ray and survives) ow.
Chapter 44:Saved by the Sponge...Really!
SpongeBob: Hooray! We made it!
Patrick: We made it!
(SpongeBob and Patrick laugh and jump with excitement)
Mr. Krabs: Oh, I he! We're free! I had own way!
Neptune: My crown! My beautiful crown!
Mindy: (gets out of the elevator) SpongeBob, Patrick, I knew you could do it! (Hugs them. Plankton then starts clapping slowly)
Plankton: (Sarcastically) Oh, yes. Well done, SpongeBoob.
SpongeBob: (Sarcastically) Sorry to rain on your parade, Plankton.
Plankton: Oh, don't worry about me. My parade shall be quite dry under my umbrella! (Pulls a cord that is hanging above him)
SpongeBob, Mindy and Patrick: Umbrella? (Turn to Neptune, who is kissing his crown. The ceiling opens up and a helmet falls out. It lands on Neptune's head. He struggles to get it off)
Chapter 45:Goofy Goober ROCK!
Plankton: Cheated? (Now to Neptune) Hold on there, baldy. (Now to SpongeBob) Oh, grow up. What, you think this is a game of kickball on the playground? You'd never had a chance to defeat me, fool! And you know why?
SpongeBob: Because you cheated?
Plankton: No, not because I cheated! Because I'm an evil genius. And you're just a kid. A stupid kid!
SpongeBob: I guess you're right, Plankton. I am just a kid.
Plankton: Of course I'm right. Okay, Neptune, time to kill.
SpongeBob: And you know, I've been through a lot in the past six days, five minutes, twenty-seven-and-a-half seconds. And if I've learned anything during that time, It's that you are who you are.
Plankton: That's right. Okay, Neptune...
SpongeBob: And no amount of mermaid magic...(Turns to Mindy)...or managerial promotion... (Turns to the light blue Mr. Krabs)...or some other third thing...can make me anything more than what I really am inside: A kid.
Plankton: That's great. Now, get back against the wall.
SpongeBob: (over microphone) But that's okay.
Plankton: What? What's going on?
SpongeBob: Because I did what everyone said a kid couldn't do. I made it to Shell City, and I beat the Cyclops, and I rode the Hasselhoff, and I brought the crown back.
Plankton: All right, we get the point.
SpongeBob: So, yeah, I'm a kid. (Dry ice smoke surrounds Plankton, and a spotlight appears on SpongeBob.) And I'm also a goofball. And a wing nut. And a Knucklehead McSpazatron!
Plankton: What? (coughs from the smoke) What's going on here?
SpongeBob: But most of all, I'm...
Plankton: Okay, settle down. Take it easy.
SpongeBob: I'm... I'm...
Plankton: What the scallop?!????!!!!???????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
SpongeBob: (Bursts into song) I'm a Goofy Goober! Rock! (Plankton is flung into the wall) You're a Goofy Goober! Rock! We're all Goofy Goobers! Rock! Goofy, goofy, goober, goober! Rock! Put your toys away, Well, all I gotta say when you tell me not to play, I say no way. No way! No, no freaking way! I'm a kid, you say, when you say I'm a kid I say, "Say it again" and then I say thanks. Thanks! Thank you very much! So if you're thinking that you'd like to be like me, Go ahead and try. The kid inside will set you free! I'm a Goofy Goober! Rock!
Plankton: (He is recovering from being flung into the wall) What's happening? (Sees SpongeBob dancing) His dance moves are impressive, but I'm in control. (To slaves) Seize him!
People: All hail Plankton. (Crowd in around SpongeBob. A few seconds later, SpongeBob bursts out in a wizard outfit, playing an electric guitar. As he plays it, its headstock lights up and a laser beam blasts out and destroys a slave's helmet.)
Fred: (After SpongeBob zaps his helmet, and it comes off)I'm free. I've been freed!
Plankton: What? (SpongeBob zaps more helmets off) No! (SpongeBob twirls into action, zapping even more helmets off) My precious helmets!
Squidward: Huh?
Mrs. Puff: Oh!
Sandy: Yee-haw!
Gary: Meow.
Plankton: His chops are too righteous. The helmets can't handle this level of rock 'n' roll. Karen, do something. Karen? (Looks for her. She laughs, surfing through the crowd. He growls) All right, that's the last straw. Neptune, I command you to...(Neptune's helmet comes off. Mindy hands him his crown)
Mindy: Here you go, Daddy.
Plankton: I better get out of here. (Runs for the door, but a crowd of freed fish burst in)
Sandals: Look, it's the wizard who saved us.
Plankton: Out of my way, fools. (The freed fish ignore him and rush to see SpongeBob, running over Plankton in the process)Ow! Ow! Ow! Ouch! (yelping)
Chapter 46:Bikini Bottom Is Free
Plankton: (He is now squished into the texture of cookie dough, covered with shoe-prints. The policemen pick him up and put him in a cage) Come on, I was just kidding. Come on, you guys knew that, didn't you? With the helmets and the big monuments...Wasn't that hilarious, everybody? (His cage is put in a police car, which drives away) I will destroy all of you! (Everyone that was watching)
Neptune: Well, Mindy, I have to admit, you were right. Your compassion for these sea creatures proved a most admirable trait. Without it, I would have never again seen my beloved crown. I think you're going to make a fine ruler of the sea one day. Now, let's go home. (Turns to leave, but is stopped by Mindy)
Mindy: Daddy, haven't you forgotten something?
Neptune: Huh? What? Oh, uh... Oh, yeah. Eugene Krabs, I forgot to unfreeze you. (He does so, but Mr. Krabs is pink instead of red)
Mr. Krabs (pink): What the...?
Neptune: Oops. I guess I had it set to "real boy" ending. (Sets it right) Mr. Krabs turns red) Oh, I'm sorry for falsely freezing you, Krabs. And may I say, sir, you are a very lucky fellow to have in your employ such a brave, faithful, and heroic young lad. Where is he, anyway?
Chapter 47:Hooray for SpongeBob
SpongeBob: I'm up here. (We see him hanging from ropes)
Patrick: I'm on it. (Gets SpongeBob down)
Neptune: Go to him now, Krabs. Embrace him. (Krabs walks over to SpongeBob)
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, me boy. I'm sorry I ever doubted ye. That's a mistake I won't make again.
SpongeBob: Oh, Mr. Krabs, you old soft-serve. (They hug)
Mr. Krabs: And now, SpongeBob, I'm gonna do something that I should've done six days ago. Mr. Squidward! Front and center, please. (Squidward comes)I think we all know who rightfully deserves to wear that manager pin. (Looks at SpongeBob)
Squidward: I couldn't agree more, sir.
Harold: Hooray for SpongeBob!
(Cheering)
SpongeBob: Wait a second, everybody. There's something I need to say first. I just don't know how to put it.
Squidward: I think I know what it is. After going on your life-changing journey, you now realize you don't want what you thought you wanted. What you really wanted was inside you all along.
SpongeBob: Are you crazy? (Grabs manager pin)I was just gonna tell you that your fly is down! (Squidward's eyes widen) Manager, this is the greatest day of my life! (The credits begin rolling as songs play)
Chapter 48:Back At The Theater
Captain: You know. David Hasselhoff is a great artist.
Usher: Excuse me, sir. You folks have to leave.
Pirates: (groans)
Captain: What? Say that again, if you dare. (Points his sword at her)
Parrot: Squawk.
Usher: You folks have to leave.
Captain: Okay.
(Everyone leaves the theater)
Pirate: Sorry about that.
(The usher sweeps up the popcorn, humming and the Paramount Pictures logo appears and then fades out)