Episode Transcript: Suction Cup Symphony
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Episode Article: Suction Cup Symphony
- Billboard workers
- Orchestra audience
- Random boyhead
- Harp player
- Piano player
- Tuba players
- Violin players
- Drum player
- Flute players
- Trumpet players
- Bass players
(Squidward is playing his clarinet, and SpongeBob is gardening, then SpongeBob notices him playing clarinet)
SpongeBob: Sound like Squidward ate at Mario's last night. (laughs) Good thing no one's around to notice his embarrassing... (gasps, because he sees two guys working on a bill board.) Those construction workers! Squidward will die of embarrassment if they hear his dilemma! Poor Squidward, he must be in too much pain to make courtesy noises. (breathes in then puffs out his chest) I'll cover for him! Whoa! (trying to get the construction workers attention) Sorry fellas, this sure is a noisy trowel. (makes noises) Look at this thing! (construction workers go back to work, and SpongeBob laughs) Ah, I really should get... (Squidward plays his clarinet again, and SpongeBob tries to make the noises again. Squidward notices him)
Squidward: SpongeBob, will you keep it down? I am trying to hold my musical talent here.
SpongeBob: You mean that wasn't gastro intestinal distress?
Squidward: And you guys! (referring to the workers) Do you really think that bill board is more important than my musical genius?
Worker 1: Well sorry, but some of us rather enjoy the Bikini Bottom Symphony Orchestra.
Squidward: Bikini Bottom Symphony Orchestra?
Worker 1: And we find their public announcements to be quite interesting. (other worker puts up a part that says "Original Compositions Wanted")
Squidward: Original Compositions Wanted? Me, a famous composer? (Squidward imagines himself riding in a limo) Thank You! (he then walks out of the limo and walks down a red carpet. He then imagines himself composing. Then it goes back to Squidward. He melts from the thought of it) That would be nice. (runs outside and kisses the worker)
Worker 1: Ew!
Squidward: Wooo-hooo! Yeah! Yeah!
SpongeBob: You've really made him happy.
Worker 2: I know what I've done!
SpongeBob: (confused) Okay. (cuts to later when Squidward is writing)
Squidward: Okay (breathes in then out) Get it together Squidward. Put your game face on. (Squidward puts a mask on himself, that says "I'm # 1!") Huh, that's better. (picks up his pen) Take your time with this one Squidward old boy. (hears something outside. Screams as he notices a sign next to the Orchestra sign that says "Due Tomorrow") Due Tomorrow? (runs around his house screaming) Only one day to write my master piece! (SpongeBob is next to him)
SpongeBob: Don't worry, Squidward, we'll do it together!
Squidward: No! (Shapes SpongeBob into a ball) Get out! (tries to kick the ball out the window. then another ball comes back, and it is Patrick) Patrick? What are you doing here?
Patrick: Uh... I don't know. I'm funny. (Squidward puts Patrick in a ball, then kicks it, then SpongeBob and Patrick come back in one ball, then turn back into there selves)
SpongeBob: Are you sure you don't want any help Squidward?
Squidward: No thank you. (drops them out the window) I am a solitary artiste.
SpongeBob: Yes, Patrick?
Patrick: Well, I think I broke my bottom.
SpongeBob: (laughs) Oh, broke your bottom. Oh, Patrick, your a card! (shows him his butt) Whoa! (there are two bones sticking out of it)
Patrick: Yeah. (sticks the bones back up his butt, they then are in his mouth) Ah. Much Better.
SpongeBob: Hey, Patrick, I think you should see a doctor.
Patrick: I can't see a doctor. My job doesn't provide me with health insurance.
SpongeBob: What job is that?
Patrick: Exactly. (cuts to later where Squidward is writing, and laughing)
Squidward: I'm a genius.
SpongeBob: The doctor will see you now, Mr. Star. (SpongeBob, and Patrick are playing doctor. SpongeBob is using a blood pressure pump, to blow up Patrick, then pops him, then returns to normal, and SpongeBob stops the stop watch) Hm, Hm, Hm.
Squidward: Can't you two be quiet for one day? My composition is due tomorrow.
SpongeBob: Oh no! No, No, No, No, No! My patient is very sick!
Patrick: Hey, I broke my butt!
Squidward: Become famous, revenge later. (thinking) Come on! Be inspired! (cuts to Squidward's brain where there is a rain storm going on. The storm then stops, and a rainbow comes out of Squidward's head. He then starts writing) Brilliant! (he hears Patrick screaming. He then continues writing, but hears Patrick screaming again, and his rainbow then melts) No! (starts crying) Why? Why? Oh, Why? (Patrick is hitting his knee with a hammer, and SpongeBob is timing how long it takes until he screams. He then writes something down on his clipboard. Squidward goes back to writing, but is interrupted when SpongeBob his looking at Patrick's mouth. Then by an X-ray, then by some squeaking. He then struggles to write, but keeps getting interrupted by screaming. Hours pass by and then Squidward is finally finished) I did it! (kisses it then laughs) Yes! (runs outside) I did it! I did it! I did it! I did it! And I did it!
Patrick: (laughs) Did what? (Squidward runs over to the stadium)
Squidward: Here you go, maestro, my masterpiece.
Conductor: Hm, Oh, Very unusual. I think we have a winner Mr. Tentacles! (Squidward smiles. Cuts to later where Squidward is about to conduct his song)
Johnny: Good evening, music lovers of Bikini Bottom. Tonight, is the premiere of a new symphony, written by one of our own, Squidward Tentacles. (Squidward walks up on stage and starts his song. Everything is fine until he hears Patrick going "ahh" then doing the hammer thing)
Squidward: I wrote down everything I heard? (Gulps and looks at the audience. SpongeBob drops a brick on Patrick's leg, then an anchor)
Pilar: That's gonna leave a mark! (SpongeBob then squeaks a rubber duck near Patrick, then uses the X-ray, then the laugh machine, then reading magazines, then SpongeBob plays with his brain, then he's reading magazines again, then using the X-ray again, Then the laugh machine, then the duck, then the magazine, then playing with the brain, then using the blood pressure pump to pump up Patrick, all in tune with the song)
Nazz: Poor little guy. (Patrick lands on Squidward, then the song ends as Patrick deflates, then bows)
Squidward: Patrick, get off of me! (Patrick does so. Squidward growls at him, then looks at the audience. Squidward begins to walk off the stage, but then everyone begins cheering.)
Female Voice: Ooh, now that's what I call music!
Shubie: That little yellow guy is awesome!
Bill: Let us not forget the chubby starfish!
Fred: Oh yeah, but the real genius is the composer! (all chanting Squidward)
SpongeBob: Wow Squidward, they really liked you! Just don't get a "swelled head" (Squidward's head begins to inflate, because Patrick is using the blood pressure pump. The screen then goes blank as his head explodes)