Episode Transcript: Pet or Pests
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Episode Article: Pet or Pests
(episode starts with SpongeBob and Patrick playing Leap-Frog)
Patrick: Okay SpongeBob! It's your turn! I'm ready!
SpongeBob: Okay Patrick! Here I come! (runs and leaps over Patrick)
Patrick: Nice landing! (rolls, leaps and lands on his head and hands) Darn, I missed! (suddenly lets go of the ground; as he's in the air) SpongeBob, look out for my body! (falls onto SpongeBob. They both fall off a cliff and land on a nest)
SpongeBob: Patrick, maybe we should play something that involves less thinking.
SpongeBob: Hey! Maybe we can play a game with this ball that was buried under here!
Patrick: Ball! Let me see it! (a ball turns itself into a worm) What a weird ball.
SpongeBob: Well, who knows how long it ... AH! Mother of Neptune! Get away from me! Get away from me!
Patrick: There's nothing to be afraid of, SpongeBob. It's just a little worm. See?
SpongeBob: You're right, Patrick. I'm sorry we destroyed your nest, little worm. I promise it won't happen again. (the worm rubs its head on SpongeBob's hand) Look Patrick!
Patrick: Looks like he's taking a fancy to you.
SpongeBob: Yeah. Hey! Why don't we invite "Mr. Wormsley" to stay at my place? At least until his nest grows back.
Patrick: That sounds delightful! (bubble-wipe to SpongeBob and Patrick arriving at SpongeBob's place)
SpongeBob:Gary! (knocks the door) Make yourself decent. (laughs) You have a visitor. (Gary goes to sleep, then wakes up) Gary, wake up! (opens the door; whispering) Patrick, just bring in here. Careful now, that's right.
SpongeBob: Oh, hi, Gary, are you ready to meet your new friend.
SpongeBob: That's right, say hello to Mr. Wormsley. (shows Mr. Wormsely. Then Gary hisses at him and Mr. Wormsley barks at him. They start to growl at each other)
Patrick: Something tells me they don't like each other.
SpongeBob: Come on now. Guys, come on. Let's touch soft spots in a friendly manner. See? You're just saying hi. That's right. There you go, that's it. Oh, I knew you could get along. There, there you go. See? Friends. Oh my goodness! Patrick-- Oh! Oh, Patrick, please do something!
Patrick: Uh, SpongeBob, I gotta get going. See you later now.
SpongeBob: Okay, Patrick, see you later then. Oh ,get it off! Somebody please!
(Skipping to later...)
SpongeBob: Baby worms, see? (Squidward looks at the worms, one of them spray green goo on his face) Aren't they just adorable at that age? (Squidward shuts the door) So how many did you want? (bubble-wipe to SpongeBob ringing Mrs. Puff's doorbell)
Mrs. Puff: Yes? Oh, it's you SpongeBob. What are you, um... doing here? (giggles) Not at the teacher's most enthusiastic student isn't welcome in her house. (SpongeBob still rings the doorbell. Sighs. SpongeBob looks down at the ground and lets go of the doorbell)
SpongeBob: Good morning, Mrs. Puff.
Mrs. Puff: It almost was.
SpongeBob: Would you like a baby worm?
Mrs. Puff: A what? (screams and becomes horrified of the baby worms, and then inflates herself destroying her house)
SpongeBob: I'll just come back later, Mrs. Puff. Have a nice day!
Mrs. Puff: (her house gets destroyed) I hate Mondays!
SpongeBob: Don't worry, little worms. I know a place we can go to find homes for every single one of you! Good morning, ma'am. How are you today? Could I interest you in some... Ma'am? That whistling. It's Larry Lobster! Hi, Larry, what are you up to?
Larry: Do I know you?
SpongeBob: Probably not.
Larry: I was just picking up some dietary supplements here at the supermarket. I've been working on my chest and buns.
SpongeBob: So I see.
Larry: Well, catch you later.
SpongeBob: Oh, Larry, wait.
Larry: No time now. Somewhere, there's sand that needs kicking.
SpongeBob: Okay. I was just gonna see if you wanted one of these poor lonely baby worms.
Larry: Baby worms?
SpongeBob: Well, yeah.
Larry: I'll take them off your hands.
Larry: Sure, why not? That's just what the nutritionist ordered: Raw protein.
(Skipping to later again...)
Mr. Krabs: Hey there, little critters, come to-- (one of the baby worms squirt green goo all over Mr. Krabs)
SpongeBob: Aww, he likes you!
Mr. Krabs: Get that disgusting vermin out of me restaurant, PRONTO!