Episode Transcript: Fun-Sized Friends

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Old Man Patrick Grandmum's the Word

Episode Article: Fun-Sized Friends

[edit] Characters

[edit] Dialogue

(episode begins with SpongeBob's, Squidward's and Patrick's houses at dusk)

Patrick: Batter up! (SpongeBob rolls in a little stove with pots, pans, a whisk, and a bowl. He pours pancake mix into the bowl and cracks two eggs. He mixes them up and puts the batter on the pan)

SpongeBob: (flips the pancakes) Ah, oh. (Patrick throws the pan and SpongeBob swings his own pan to hit it like he was playing baseball)

Patrick: I got it, I got it! (falls on the ground as the pancakes land on his plate)

SpongeBob: (sticks out his tongue) Wah! (eats one pancake. Patrick slurps down on the pancakes and the two friends give each other a high-five)

Patrick: Whoo-hoo! (he and SpongeBob run around Squidward's house while banging on pots and pans. Moments later, an extremely irritated Squidward opens the door and SpongeBob and Patrick crash into the door, landing in front of Squidward.)

Squidward: What are you two dizzy dingbats doing out here?!

SpongeBob: Just treasuring our time together, Squidward.

Squidward: Well, that time is over! Say good night, go to your separate houses, and be quiet! (SpongeBob and Patrick whimper and cry)

Patrick: (cries) I can't do it! I can't be away from my best friend!

SpongeBob: (cries) No, it hurts too much! (he and Patrick continue to cry)

Squidward: Oh, will you two cut it out? (SpongeBob and Patrick stop crying)

SpongeBob: Cut it out... Squidward, that's a great idea!

Squidward and Patrick: It is? (SpongeBob takes out a pair of scissors, cuts off part of his head and forms it into a tiny version of himself)

Patrick: Wow! My turn! (rips his head off and also forms it into a tiny version of himself. SpongeBob and Patrick hug each as the tiny versions of themselves hug and dance around)

Squidward: I think I'm gonna be sick! (gets sick and runs back into his house)

SpongeBob: (gives Mini SpongeBob to Patrick) Here you go, Patrick. Now we never have to be apart, (Patrick gives SpongeBob Mini Patrick) even when we're not together.

Patrick: This is great. See you forever, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: Yeah, see you forever, Patrick. (enters his house and yawns) Time for bed, Tiny Patrick. (Mini Patrick jumps happily on SpongeBob's hands and hops on his head as SpongeBob goes upstairs. Bubble-wipe to SpongeBob washing his face with soap and water. Mini Patrick jumps off of SpongeBob's head and dives into the sink. He pops out of the suds and rides on the rubber duck like a cowboy. Bubble-wipe to Mini SpongeBob brushing Patrick's teeth. However, he shrivels up by the bad odor inside Patrick's mouth and falls into the sink)

Patrick: Hmm. (bubble-wipe to SpongeBob taking the clothes off of his teddy bear)

Teddy Bear: Uh. (covers himself) Oh.

Mini Patrick: (now wearing the teddy bear's clothes) Ah. (SpongeBob puts a hat on Mini Patrick's head and they both laugh) Ah! (jumps into SpongeBob's arms. Bubble-wipe to Patrick, Mini SpongeBob, SpongeBob and Mini Patrick sleeping together in their respective houses. The next day, SpongeBob enters the Krusty Krab with Mini Patrick wearing a sailor suit)

SpongeBob: Good morning, Squidward.

Squidward: Says who?

SpongeBob: (chuckles) You sit right there, my hungry little sailor, while I whip you up some grub from the galley. (pokes Mini Patrick)

Mini Patrick: (laughs) Dah, uh-huh. (SpongeBob takes out a small version of his grill and puts a tiny Krabby Patty on it to cook. Mini Patrick's mouth waters) Ah. (SpongeBob fixes up the tiny Krabby Patty for Mini Patrick and serves it to him. Dances gleefully and goes to enjoy his sandwich) Ahh. Hmm? (sees the bigger Krabby Patties on the grill and whimpers. Throws away the tiny Krabby Patty) Ahhh! Yah! (jumps off the counter and flies over to the grill, but gets slammed in the face by SpongeBob's spatula)

SpongeBob: Huh? Careful there, little buddy. The grill is hot. (puts Mini Patrick back on the counter with his spatula)

Mini Patrick: (gasps as he sees SpongeBob dump French fries into the fryer) Ohhh. (SpongeBob pushes down the fryer and begins making French fries. Climbs down from the counter, climbs on the fryer and goes to dive in the cooking oil)

SpongeBob: (struggles to open a pickle jar) Huh?

Mini Patrick: (jumps real high) Whee-ah! (lands in SpongeBob's hat)

SpongeBob: Stop! (squeezes Mini Patrick out of his hat) Bad, Tiny Patrick! Hmm. (takes out a rope and ties Mini Patrick with it) Sorry to do this, little guy, but I have to keep you safe while I get some work done. (ties the rope around his waist and puts Mini Patrick in his pocket. Goes back to flipping patties on the grill) Ah-yah. (Mini Patrick pulls himself out of SpongeBob's pocket and swings himself into the side of the grill, crashing into it. Mini Patrick whimpers. Meanwhile, back at Patrick's house, Patrick and Mini SpongeBob are still sleeping. The sand clock rings 12:00 and Patrick bangs on it to stop. Patrick and Mini SpongeBob stretch and yawn)

Patrick: Good morning. (Mini SpongeBob jumps on a sand table and holds out a knife and fork, ready for breakfast. Brings out various foods and makes it into a sandwich. Sticks out his tongue and eats the whole thing. leaving Mini SpongeBob stunned) Didn't think I was gonna be able to eat all that. But then I did! (laughs. Bubble-wipe to SpongeBob returning home with Mini Patrick, who isn't to trilled with SpongeBob's pampering and is now dressed in a fancy suit)

SpongeBob: (humming as he brushes Mini Patrick's hair) Brushy, brushy, brushy. (sees Patrick and Mini SpongeBob trying to lift a sand sofa)

Patrick: Come on, Tiny SpongeBob. You gotta lift with your back. (Mini SpongeBob tries to lift the sand sofa, but it is too big and heavy for him. Sees SpongeBob and lets go of the sand sofa, flattening Mini SpongeBob underneath) Oh, oh. Hey, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: Patrick, hi. (gets nervous)

Patrick: (makes a weird face) Eeh. (gets nervous) Hmm. Hmm. (SpongeBob becomes more nervous and couldn't figure out what to say. The sand sofa crumbles. Mini SpongeBob pops out of the sand pile, gasping to breathe)

SpongeBob: So, uh, I'd love to hang out, but I already have some plans with Tiny Patrick here.

Patrick: Oh, yeah, well, me and Tiny SpongeBob, (picks up Mini SpongeBob) we're pretty busy tonight, so good night.

SpongeBob: Good night. (Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick cry out for each other. It seems as though that SpongeBob and Patrick are unintentionally preventing their miniature selves from seeing each other. Bubble-wipe to Mini Patrick now dressed in some baby pajamas with a zipper. He is growing tired of SpongeBob's pampering) I don't want you getting into trouble during the night, so you're gonna stay in the aquarium like a good little sleepy clam. (drops Mini Patrick in the aquarium)

Mini Patrick: Ahh! (tries to climb out, but SpongeBob puts a pile of books on top of the aquarium. SpongeBob goes to sleep as Mini Patrick knocks on the aquarium. Bubble-wipe to Mini SpongeBob trying to open a jar of seanut butter, but he can't because he only has one arm)

Patrick: Huh? Hey. Didn't you used to have one, two...two arms? Okay, little buddy. Let's find that arm of yours. Oh. (digs under his sand chair) Oh. (finds remote) Nope. (finds wallet) Nope. Hmm. (finds Mini SpongeBob's arm) Huh?

Mini SpongeBob: Ah!

Patrick: Nope. (finds plastic toy arm) Oh. A-HA! I got it! (puts Mini SpongeBob in a little tool and tightens him real tight) I'll fix you up in no time. (drills the toy arm into Mini SpongeBob's body) Good as new.

Mini SpongeBob: Ehh. Huh? (looks at his new arm, tries it, but it swings and bashes his head)

Patrick: Okay, good night. (falls asleep)

Mini SpongeBob: Huh? (snaps his fingers to wake Patrick up, but no avail. Jumps down, turns off the light and leaves Patrick alone, sleeping in his house. Sneaks into SpongeBob's house through his closet) Oh? (looks around and sees Mini Patrick sleeping in the aquarium. Climbs up and wakes up Mini Patrick. Rips off the toy arm and regenerates his real arm) Ding! (puts the toy arm under the aquarium) Yah! (hops on the toy arm and makes the aquarium fall and break, freeing Mini Patrick in the process)

SpongeBob: (snores, grumbles) Yes, Squidward, extra mayo, I heard you. (Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick look at each other. Mini Patrick sees how beaten up Mini SpongeBob is just as Mini SpongeBob sees how pampered Mini Patrick is being. Both of them grumble, for they have had enough of SpongeBob and Patrick's treatment towards them and vow to get even with them. Bubble-wipe to SpongeBob waking up. He looks around and sees Patrick next to him) Oh, hi, Patrick.

Patrick: Hey, SpongeBob.

SpongeBob: I don't remember us having a sleepover last night. (they look down and realize that they are both nailed to the floor. They struggle to free themselves until Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick climb onto Patrick's belly and jump up and down)

Patrick: What's going on, SpongeBob?

SpongeBob: Oh, hey, little guys. You're playing with each other. So cute. (both Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick grumble and pull out a jackhammer and a pair of pliers. Mini Patrick digs the pliers in SpongeBob's nose and pulls out a long piece of nose hair. Mini SpongeBob drills a hole in the middle of Patrick's face and pours pepper through the hole. Patrick goes to sneeze, but Mini SpongeBob ties up Patrick's mouth, making his head puff up and explode. Mini Patrick pulls on SpongeBob's toes. Mini SpongeBob mows Patrick's eyebrows. Mini Patrick smudges lipstick on SpongeBob's face. Mini SpongeBob punches Patrick's eyeball with a boxing glove)

Mini SpongeBob: Whew. (both Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick shake hands as they have gotten their revenge on their tormenters)

Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick: Huh? (Mini SpongeBob's stomach grumbles and points to his mouth)

Mini SpongeBob: Ah, ah. (licks his lips and sees the refrigerator. Mini Patrick points to the television. They both chitter gleefully and go to do their activity. Mini SpongeBob climbs up the stove and puts a pan on it. Then he opens the fridge) Hey! (climbs back onto the stove with an egg. Cracks it open and goes to fry the egg. Attempts to flip it with a spatula)

Patrick: What are they doing, SpongeBob?

SpongeBob: Just trying to live their lives, Patrick. Just trying to live their lives. (Mini Patrick attempts lift the remote, but couldn't because it was too big and heavy) Poor little guys. (Mini SpongeBob attempts to flip the egg, but ends up sending himself and the egg flying into the television) Our world is just too big for them. Ohh, I have an idea. (slithers himself free)

Patrick: Oh, I hope it's not another one of your crazy plans to steal the Krabby Patty secret formula.

SpongeBob: You're thinking of Plankton, Patrick.

Patrick: Oh, yeah! (SpongeBob frees Patrick and they run off. SpongeBob grabs a toolbox. Patrick grabs paint cans. SpongeBob grabs a bowl of fruit. They both run outside and prepare to build something. Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick follow them outside)

SpongeBob: TA-DA! A tiny house for my tiny friend.

Mini SpongeBob: Ahh! (chuckles and hugs his new pineapple house)

Patrick: Oh, I get it! (grabs a smaller rock and drops it onto Mini Patrick. Mini Patrick opens it and laughs)

SpongeBob: Nice work, Patrick. Whoops! (grabs a tiny snail) Almost forgot. (gives the tiny snail to Mini SpongeBob) You've got to have a Gare-Bear.

Mini SpongeBob: Oh, yay!

Mini Patrick: Ohh. (Patrick taps his shoulder) Huh? (chuckles as Patrick gives Mini Patrick a chicken leg and hugs it. Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick goes into their respective houses)

SpongeBob and Patrick: Aww... (hug each other) Hmm...? (the sky gets dark and turns to night)

Patrick: Hmm?

SpongeBob: Let's leave 'em alone, Patrick. (he and Patrick tip-toe away. Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick come out and begin talking; they've realized that something is missing in between their houses. They run off. The next day, a small sand castle version of Squidward's house is shown. Squidward's eyes open in the sand)

Squidward: (wakes up) Ah, too bright. (hears chattering) Oh, those two again. (shakes the sand off. It appears that Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick snuck into Squidward's house, took Squidward and buried him up to his head in the sand right in between their houses. Just then, Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick run around Squidward, banging pots and pans really loud) What the— (Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick continue to bang on pots and pans. Mini Patrick throws a pot and Mini SpongeBob hits it like a baseball, hitting Squidward in the nose) Ow! (grumbles. Mini SpongeBob and Mini Patrick gasp, jump onto Squidward's nose, and hug him) No, get away. Get away! (screams as the camera pans out)


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