http://en.spongepedia.org/api.php?action=feedcontributions&user=71.244.109.219&feedformat=atomSpongePedia - User contributions [en]2024-03-29T12:52:32ZUser contributionsMediaWiki 1.19.0http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Wishing_You_WellEpisode Transcript: Wishing You Well2019-08-02T19:18:06Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Dialogue */</p>
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<br />
Episode Article: [[Wishing You Well]]<br />
<br />
==Characters==<br />
*[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br />
*[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]]<br />
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br />
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br />
*[[Eugene H. Krabs|Mr. Krabs]]<br />
*[[Sandy Cheeks|Sandy]]<br />
*[[Mrs. Puff]]<br />
*[[Sheldon J. Plankton|Plankton]]<br />
*The person who eats Mr. Krabs <br />
*Other Bikini Bottomites <br />
<br />
==Dialogue==<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs:''' (walks up to a pay phone to check if there is any money in it but there is none) Nothing. Oh well. (hears something in the distance) That sounds like a quarter crying for help. (a quarter rolls in front of Mr Krabs) Come to papa!<br><br />
<br />
'''Mom Fish:''' Hold it right there, buddy. My son just dropped that quarter.<br><br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Yeah? Well your boy looks pretty shifty to me. How do I know he didn't steal it? (woman hits him in the face with <br />
her purse) Hey! That little brat is throwing perfectly good money away! Oh, so if I can't have it, no one... (gets hit in <br />
the face with the purse again) I hope he throws all your retirement money down a hole. (walks over to the well) Poor little <br />
quarter. What the...? This well is full of money! Don't worry little fellas, I'll save ya! (tries to climb in the well but <br />
is too big) Oh, it's no use. Me poop deck's too big.<br><br />
<br />
'''Lady Fish:''' Make a wish, dear.<br><br />
<br />
'''Harold:''' All my wishes have already come true.<br><br />
<br />
'''Lady Fish:''' Oh you. (tosses the coin at the well)<br><br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Noo!! (jumps at the coin) I'll save ya, money! (grabs the coin) Gotcha. What do you heartless brutes think you're <br />
doing?<br><br />
<br />
'''Harold:''' Umm, using the wishing well.<br><br />
<br />
'''Lady Fish:''' You toss in a coin and make a wish.<br><br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs:''' And then what?<br><br />
<br />
'''Harold:''' And...that's it. Nothing else happens.<br><br />
<br />
'''Lady Fish:''' It's fun!<br><br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs:''' You mean suckers throw in money down a hole for fun? That's the greatest scam ever.<br><br />
<br />
'''Harold:''' Can we have our quarter back now? (scene cuts to Krusty Krab)<br><br />
<br />
'''Squidward:''' SpongeBob, why aren't those patties ready?<br><br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob:''' You can't rush perfection.<br><br />
<br />
'''Squidward:''' I'm not rushing perfection. I'm rushing you.<br><br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob:''' (laughs) Always the kidder, Squidward.<br><br />
<br />
'''Squidward:''' Oh, this job stinks! But at least I'm not digging ditches.<br><br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs:''' (enters Krusty Krab) Squidward, SpongeBob, I got a new job for ya. (scene cuts to outside Krusty Krab where there <br />
is a red X on the ground) X marks the spot of the Eugene Krabs Memorial wishing well.<br><br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob:''' A wishing well, here? Wow!<br><br />
<br />
'''Squidward:''' Don't you have to be dead to have a memorial or anything?<br><br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs:''' Oh, Squidward, don't you believe in magic?<br><br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob:''' Yeah, Squidward, don't you believe in magic? (walks off)<br><br />
<br />
'''Squidward:''' No, I don't, and neither does Mr Krabs.<br><br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob:''' Well, I do. This well's gonna make a lot of dreams come true. (starts digging) What's the first thing you're <br />
gonna wish for?<br><br />
<br />
'''Squidward:''' To be far away from you as possible. C'mon, SpongeBob, this hole's not gonna dig itself. I'm certainly not gonna <br />
do it.<br><br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob:''' Squidward, aren't you excited? This is really gonna help people.<br />
<br />
'''Music:''' "[[Down The Well]]"<br />
<br />
Take a penny and some magic<br />
Even though your life is tragic, (Squidward: Hey!)<br />
You can throw all your dreams down the well.<br />
<br />
Although everyday the pain grows<br />
You ride unicorns on rainbows,<br />
If you throw all your dreams down the well.<br />
<br />
When your life's come apart at the scenes<br />
And you've given up all your dreams,<br />
Here is just the means to make those dreams come true.<br />
<br />
No more suffering, no more sighin'<br />
No more pain and no more cryin' (Squidward: Ow! I'm not crying! Ow, ow.)<br />
When you throw all your dreams down the well<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (puts an "open" sign in front of the well) Well, Squidward, what do you think?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: That was the worst song I ever heard. But at least this stupid well's finished.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: It's beautiful. (takes a whiff of the air) You smell that boys? That's the smell of money.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: You mean magic, don't ya?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: All I can smell is that dumpster. (scene pans over to a dumpster behind Squidward)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: All right, Squidward, you can go back to the register.<br />
<br />
Squidward: As long as there's no singing.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: And I've got a date with a krabby patty.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Hold on there, SpongeBob. Let me show you your new station. It's kind of a promotion. Sorta.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Promotion? (scene cuts to SpongeBob being lowered in the well in a bucket) Why do I have to go down in the well?<br />
<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: To collect the money!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: How long do I have to stay down here?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: See ya in 8 hours.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Thanks for the promotion. It sure is dark and scary down here. (a coin hits SpongeBob in the head)<br><br />
<br />
Sandy: I sure wish I had a fancy telescope. One that works underwater. That'd make me happier than a junebug at a <br />
porch light sale.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Our very first wish! I can't wait till it comes... (another coin hits SpongeBob in the head)<br><br />
<br />
Plankton: I have presented you with a monetary offering as custom dictates. My wish, nay my command, is to be taller. Just <br />
a little? Just big enough to crush my enemies, like the vermin they are!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Gosh... (another coin hits SpongeBob in the head) Ow!<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: I wish I had a snazzy new boat. I wanna be a hot ridin' momma. (SpongeBob gasps. Patrick walks up to the well <br />
drinking a soda and throws it down the well when he is finished)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Hey!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Oh my gosh. Who said that?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Patrick!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: How do you know my name?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Patrick, this is a wishing well. Just throw in a coin and make a wish.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Ok, magical talking trashcan. (takes out a coin from his pocket) I wish SpongeBob were here to see this. (throws <br />
himself and the coin down the well)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Patrick.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (lands on top of SpongeBob) Hi, SpongeBob! I got my wish.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Patrick, you're suppose to let go of the coin when you throw it.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: But I got my wish.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Well, we've got 6½ hours till the end of my shift. What do you want to do now?<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (pokes SpongeBob) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (pokes Patrick) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (pokes Spongebob) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (pokes Patrick) Tag, you're it. (day turns into night)<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (pokes SpongeBob) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (pokes Patrick) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (pokes SpongeBob) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (pokes Patrick) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: SpongeBob, what kind of haul did you get?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I did great, Mr Krabs. I got a nickel from Sandy, 2 pennies from Mrs. Puff, a penny from Plankton... (Patrick <br />
smiles big) ...and this slightly used pair of dentures.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: And they fell on my head.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Well, I could probably get a couple of bucks for Patrick. Nah. You better just hand up the money. (sends the <br />
bucket down)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: This wishing well was a wonderful idea, Mr. Krabs. Has anyone's wish come true, yet? <br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Uhh, not yet. But <br />
I'm sure if you believe strong enough, and dug deep enough, everyone’s wishes will come true.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Really?<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Yeah, sure, whatever.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Can we come out now?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Goodness, no. You gotta stay down there just in case any late-night wishers come by. I'll be back for ya at dawn. <br />
(leaves)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Aww, no one's wishes are coming true. What did we do wrong? I know I believe hard enough. Maybe I just didn't <br />
dig deep enough. What do you say, Patrick? Are you ready to dig for some magic?<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Yeah.<br />
<br />
'''Music:''' "[[Magic Is Missing]]"<br />
<br />
Oh, the magic has gone missin'<br />
And everyone's still wishin'<br />
But their dreams have fallen flat upon the ground.<br />
<br />
You'll find magic under rubble<br />
So, Patrick, grab a shovel<br />
And here is where the magic can be found.<br />
<br />
We're at the bottom of a well<br />
But man won't it be swell,<br />
When we make everyone’s wishes all come true.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (digs a hole and something yellow glows from the hole) Holy mackerel, look Patrick! We've struck magic.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Is that good?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Next to being a fry cook, it's the most important thing I've ever done.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: It's the only thing I've ever done.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Having fun down there, SpongeBob? (laughs)<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Hi, Squidward.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Patrick's down there, too? It just gets better and better.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Do you wanna make a wish?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (laughs) I got my wish. You two are stuck in a dark hole and away from me.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Guess what, Squidward? We found the magic.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (laughs) There's no magic, SpongeBob. Wishing well's are just a scam to fool saps like you.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: No, it's true! We did find the magic. Oh, I wish you could see it. (Squidward falls down the well langing on <br />
SpongeBob and Patrick) Squidward! You decided to join the party.<br />
<br />
Patrick: Party!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Let me out of here.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: We were just gonna play some party games.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (pokes Squidward) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (pokes Squidward) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (pokes Squidward) Tag, you're it.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: I gotta get out of here. (tries to climb out of the well)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob & Patrick: Go Squidward! Go Squidward! (he falls)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: There's not way to climb out of here.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Maybe if you had more upper arm strength.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Yeah, you should work out more.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Well, why don't I just start right now? After all, I got a couple of dumbbells right here. (laughs)<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: I don't get it.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Could you not stand so close? You're making me claustrophobic.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: What does claustrophobic mean?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: It means he's afraid of Santa Clause.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No, it doesn't.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (Trying to scare Squidward) Ho, ho, ho! (giggles)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Stop it, Patrick, you're scaring him!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Ho, ho, ho!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: It's not working, Patrick.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Darn.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Umm, Squidward, you're standing on my foot.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Oh, sorry, SpongeBob.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (holding a plate of ribs) And you got your elbow in my ribs.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Eww. Patrick!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (shoves Squidward) And stop stepping in my potato salad.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Hey, hey, hey, guys.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (shoves Patrick) Stop pushing me, Patrick.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Oh, you mean like this? (shoves Squidward)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No, like this! (shoves Patrick)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (both Patrick and Squidward are fighting) You shouldn't fight in here. This is a magical place. (scene zooms to <br />
outside the well)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Patrick, get off of me. (scene zooms back into the well where Patrick is sitting on Squidward) I told you I am <br />
claustrophobic.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Nice try, Squidward, but there's no Santa Clause here.<br />
<br />
Squidward: Patrick!!(scene cuts to daytime where Mr. Krabs returns to the well)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Good morning, SpongeBob! Let's see what ya got. (raises the bucket) Boy, it's heavy. Must be a lot of money. <br />
(Squidward comes out of the well)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Free. I'm free!<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Squidward? What were you doing down there? I didn't approve of the overtime. Or where you sneaking here in the <br />
dead of night for free wishes?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: The only thing I wish for is to be far away from here. (gets hit by a bus that is traveling to 'very very far <br />
away') Ow.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Bye, Squidward. Enjoy your trip!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Lucky. (walks off)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: So how much money did you make last night?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: We didn't get any money. But we found something better. We found the magic.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: The what?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: We dug down deeper in the well and found the magic. Now all the wishes will come true!<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Listen closely, SpongeBob. You don't get what you want in life just by wishing for it. (a big telescope with an <br />
eye looking out of it appears. Mr. Krabs and SpongeBob scream) What in the deep blue is that?<br><br />
<br />
Sandy: There's a full moon out tonight. Do you like my new telescope I wished for?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: That's great, Sandy!<br><br />
<br />
Sandy: That wishing well sure does work.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Just a coincidence. (Mrs. Puff drives up in a new boat)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: What do you think of my new hot rod?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: It's beautiful, Mrs. Puff. How's about letting me take it for a spin? (both laugh)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: (calm, but annoyed) No. (drives off)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: See, Mr. Krabs? She wished for that boat.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: You mean she stole that boat.<br><br />
<br />
Plankton: (walks up gigantically tall) Morning, SpongeBob, Krabs. Beautiful day. (laughs and runs over to the <br />
buildings and knocks them over)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Is that proof enough for ya?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: You'll never get me to believe in magic, never! Just to prove it to ya. (walks over to the well) I'll <br />
demonstrate. I wish...I was steamed and served with a side of melted butter. (lets go of the penny and laughs)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs! No!!<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Well, where's your magic now? (vanishes in thin air and appears as a real crab on a plate) Oh, where am I? What's <br />
going on here?(person sits down and puts on an eating bib that says "THE END" on it) Mr. Krabs: Uh-oh. I do believe in magic. <br />
I do believe in magic. I do believe in magic. Oh-no!!<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Transcripts/Season 4}}<br />
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 4]]<br />
[[Category:Transcript]]</div>71.244.109.219http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Mrs._Puff,_You%27re_FiredEpisode Transcript: Mrs. Puff, You're Fired2019-08-02T19:10:54Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Dialogue */</p>
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|}<br />
<br />
Episode Article: [[Mrs. Puff, You're Fired (Episode)|Mrs. Puff, You're Fired]]<br />
<br />
==Characters==<br />
*[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br />
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br />
*[[Mrs. Puff]]<br />
*[[Sergeant Roderick]]<br />
*[[Mr. Fitz]]<br />
<br />
==Dialogue==<br />
<br />
(At Mrs. Puff's Boating School)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Good morning, Mrs. Puff. I'm Mr. Fitz. I represent the 'Voting Teachers Accreditation Bureau'. As you know, your teaching certificate is up for renewal. However, we've noticed there have been an unusually large number of failings from this classroom.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: That's impossible. In all my years of teaching, only one student has failed my class.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Yes, but he's failed 1,258,056 times. (shows folder with a bunch of files, making a laughing SpongeBob)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: You don't understand. SpongeBob is...unteachable.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: We cannot blame the students for the incompetence of the teacher.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Honk-honk! Beep-beep! I'm ready to drive. Are you ready for my driving test today, Mrs. Puff?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Ok, Mrs. Puff, if SpongeBob fails this test, you will be replaced.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: (in the boat with SpongeBob and Mr. Fitz) Ok, SpongeBob, let's demonstrate for Mr. Fitz everything I've taught you in <br />
boating school. Now, what's the first thing we do before we start boating?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (snaps fingers) Oh! Seatbelt-a-rooni. One second. (gets tangled in seat-belt then squeezes self through. As <br />
SpongeBob is doing this, Mr. Fitz is writing on his notepad)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Then what do you do?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Start the engine?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Yes.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (starts the boat) Now what do I do?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Drive the boat. (SpongeBob drives into a boat)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Did I pass this time, Mrs. Puff?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: No, SpongeBob, you failed.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I failed?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: It's not you that failed, SpongeBob. It's Mrs. Puff that's failed you. You are relieved of your teaching duties.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: I won't be teaching SpongeBob anymore? (laughs excitedly) No more...SpongeBob? I thought this day would never come. Whoo-hoo! Good-bye, SpongeBob! Have a nice life. (exhales her puffiness) Free at last. Free at last.<br><br />
<br />
(Scene cuts to Mrs. Puff's Boating School, her name crossed out with paint. In the classroom, SpongeBob and his classmates are at their seats, but Mrs. Puff's desk is now vacant)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I got Mrs. Puff fired. <br />
<br />
(Sergeant Roderick breaks down the door)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Hello, worthless students. I'm your new instructor. (breaks Mrs. Puff's name tag in pieces) No one's ever failed my class...that's LIVED THROUGH it. I can assure you these next 4 weeks will be the worst years of your miserable lives. Your spines will break, your teeth will ache, your eyes will be bloodshot. (students are freaking out) You will drive out of this school in style, or you will be carted out in your granny's handbasket. Everyone will follow the rules of the class. First rule: No talking.<br><br />
<br />
Nat: Does that mean-- (gets thrown through the door)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Second rule: No eating in my class. (takes out a box of bon-bons) Would anyone care for a bon-bon?<br><br />
<br />
Monroe: Uhh... I'll eat one. (Students gasp. Student #2 walks up to the instructor)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Pick your favorite. (Monroe takes one and eats it) How's it taste?<br><br />
<br />
Monroe: It's a delightful taste sensation.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: '''''NO EATING IN MY CLASSROOM!''''' (throws Monroe through another door) Now, if anyone else is man enough to stay in this class... (everyone but SpongeBob run off) Looks like you're the man... sponge.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I am?<br><br />
<br />
(The scene changes to SpongeBob and Sergeant Roderick outside)<br />
<br />
Roderick: Do you wanna learn how to drive or what?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! I'm ready to drive! (jumps in the boat)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: What do you think you're doing?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Ready for my test, sir.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: (takes SpongeBob out of the boat) You're not ready to drive yet until you learn that first. (shows roads with all sorts of obstacles) This is ''the'' most grueling driving course ever devised. You will learn every turn, bump, and crack on it. You'll start out crawling it.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Crawl?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Hup two. Hup two. Hup two. Hup two. (SpongeBob crawls forward)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Left turn. (turns left) Crack. Bump. Nickel. Hey a nickel!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Keep your eyes on the road, cadet.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: PEBBLE!! Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! (crawls faster and more out of control. Gets the pebble stuck in his hand) Ow!! Wow!! (rolls down the obstacle course into the air, out of the water, then back down where the instructor catches him) Ow!! Wow!! Wow!! Wow!! Aah! (stops screaming) Whew!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: I'm ashamed of you, cadet. Tripped up by a wee pebble. What are you supposed to be learning in my class?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: How to drive, sir?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Affirmative. But before you learn to drive, you must learn to crawl. And then you learn to walk and then you learn <br />
to run. But before you learn to walk, you must learn to crawl. I want you to crawl!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sir, yes, sir!!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Now get out there! (SpongeBob crawls around a hole. SpongeBob carries the instructor on his back) Hut! Hut! (then he stops at a stop sign, and runs in and out of some radioactive waste) Every good boater needs to know his vehicle inside and out. (hands SpongeBob a wrench) Here, go take that boat apart. (SpongeBob takes the boat apart) I'm impressed, son. Put it back together again!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (laughs) Oh, that'll be easy.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Are you sure?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Um, yeah. You just put the jig-a-mahoos on the poo-hicky and uhh... (laughs) I might need a couple minutes. (later, the instructor is sleeping) It's ready, sarge!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Jumpin' jellyfish! (SpongeBob put back together a rocket as it blasts off. Later, the instructor is looking through some binoculars at SpongeBob, who is wearing a hat with mirrors on it. SpongeBob runs up to a red light and stops until it turns green)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Watch for pedestrians. Check mirrors. Observe that speed limit. Watch for pedestri...ans!! (he can't avoid the signs, crashes through a lot of pedestrians shattering them) Whoa! Aah!!! Whoa!! Oh! Oh!! Oh!!! Wow! Oh!!!! Oh!!!!! (slides into the instructor who glares at him) So, umm, how'd I do?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: How'd you do? Why don't you ask the shattered remains of this (holds up a piece of a pedestrian) pedestrian-- '''HOW YOU DID?!!!!?'''<br><br />
<br />
(Much later SpongeBob and the Instructor are seen standing near each other)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Now I know this road course forwards, backwards, and sideways. Am I ready to get behind the wheel?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Not quite. (puts blindfold on SpongeBob) Now do it blindfolded. (SpongeBob gets run over by a boat)<br><br />
<br />
Narrator: Several days later.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: 1003, 1004, 1005. (running with his black shoes.) (stops) Ooh, pebble #143. (steps over pebble) Ha! You will not trip me up pebble #143. 1006, 1007, 1008. (old lady pedestrian pops up) Old lady with a ham sandwich. 1009, 1010, 1011, 1012, 1 th...<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Congratulations. You're ready to get behind the wheel.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Really? I'm ready! I'm ready. I'm... (runs into a pole)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: (now in boat) Let's see what I taught you, laddy.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! (drives boat) Left turn at pebble #143. (makes left turn) (pedestrian kid pops up. SpongeBob stops) Kid with a ball. (SpongeBob continues) Nice boy.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Nice driving. Now parallel park up ahead. (SpongeBob parallel parks) Very good. (now at real exam) Now, boy, the time has come to show Mr. Fitz what you've learned.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! Step 1: seat belts. (puts on seat belt with no problem)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Excellent work, cadet. What's next?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Step 2 would be...ignite engine.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Step 3?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Step 3 would be... (takes out blindfold) ...engage blindfold.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: What? You can't drive a boat with a blindfold on. That's illegal!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: But I can't do it without a blindfold.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Drive, boy! DRIVE! (SpongeBob drives into a gas can, blowing them out of the boating school) Mayday! Mayday! You're off course. (boat drives into 2 buildings then underground. Spurts out from a fire hydrant. Then crashes through a bakery and into a field where Mrs. Puff is painting the scenery)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Oh, I feel so serene now that I'm away from that homicidal maniac, SpongeBob. (Mrs. Puff notices the boat and attempts to paint something really quick. When the boat runs into her, the painting shows SpongeBob, the instructor, and Mr. Fitz fearing their lives)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: The brake, son!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Aye aye, sir. (takes brake apart) There you go, sir. All I had to do was unscrew two little bolts.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: I'm gonna stop this thing. Tell my wife I love her. (jumps in front of the boat in an attempt to stop it) Come get some! (boat runs over him)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Man down! Man down! (SpongeBob drives into the [[Bikini Bottom|city]] and into each building) Uh, sorry, excuse me. Sorry.<br><br />
<br />
[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]: Hey, SpongeBob!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sorry, Patrick, I can't stop the boat right now. (with Patrick's pants blocking his eyes) I CAN'T SEE! I CAN'T SEE!!!! <br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (completely nude, running after SpongeBob) My pants!!!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Hey! I can't see! (dodges traffic and pedestrians. Parallel parks) Did I pass?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Well, if there was a 'destroy the city' part of the test, you would have.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (takes his pants off SpongeBob's head) The nerve of some people.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Sorry, SpongeBob, you failed again. Even our finest instructor could not teach you. Mrs. Puff, you're hired again.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (at boating school) Hey, Mrs. Puff, sorry that I'm unteachable.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: It's okay. Mr. Fitz gave me my teaching certificate back. And your OCA was destroyed in the explosion, so it's as if you never failed.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I got you a welcome back gift, Mrs. Puff. (shows name tag) I found all the pieces and glued them back together. I promise it won't take me a million tries this time. (Mrs. Puff cries and the name tag comes apart)<br />
<br />
{{Transcripts/Season 4}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Transcript]]<br />
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 4]]</div>71.244.109.219http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Mrs._Puff,_You%27re_FiredEpisode Transcript: Mrs. Puff, You're Fired2019-08-02T19:08:05Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Dialogue */</p>
<hr />
<div>{| border="1"<br />
|-bgcolor="#CCCCCC"<br />
!Back Episode Transcript<br />
!Next Episode Transcript<br />
|-<br />
|align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode Transcript: Krusty Towers|Krusty Towers]]<br />
|[[Episode Transcript: Chimps Ahoy|Chimps Ahoy]]<br />
|}<br />
<br />
Episode Article: [[Mrs. Puff, You're Fired (Episode)|Mrs. Puff, You're Fired]]<br />
<br />
==Characters==<br />
*[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br />
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br />
*[[Mrs. Puff]]<br />
*[[Sergeant Roderick]]<br />
*[[Mr. Fitz]]<br />
<br />
==Dialogue==<br />
<br />
(At Mrs. Puff's Boating School)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Good morning, Mrs. Puff. I'm Mr. Fitz. I represent the 'Voting Teachers Accreditation Bureau'. As you know, your teaching certificate is up for renewal. However, we've noticed there have been an unusually large number of failings from this classroom.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: That's impossible. In all my years of teaching, only one student has failed my class.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Yes, but he's failed 1,258,056 times. (shows folder with a bunch of files, making a laughing SpongeBob)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: You don't understand. SpongeBob is...unteachable.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: We cannot blame the students for the incompetence of the teacher.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Honk-honk! Beep-beep! I'm ready to drive. Are you ready for my driving test today, Mrs. Puff?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Ok, Mrs. Puff, if SpongeBob fails this test, you will be replaced.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: (in the boat with SpongeBob and Mr. Fitz) Ok, SpongeBob, let's demonstrate for Mr. Fitz everything I've taught you in <br />
boating school. Now, what's the first thing we do before we start boating?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (snaps fingers) Oh! Seatbelt-a-rooni. One second. (gets tangled in seat-belt then squeezes self through. As <br />
SpongeBob is doing this, Mr. Fitz is writing on his notepad)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Then what do you do?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Start the engine?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Yes.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (starts the boat) Now what do I do?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Drive the boat. (SpongeBob drives into a boat)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Did I pass this time, Mrs. Puff?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: No, SpongeBob, you failed.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I failed?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: It's not you that failed, SpongeBob. It's Mrs. Puff that's failed you. You are relieved of your teaching duties.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: I won't be teaching SpongeBob anymore? (laughs excitedly) No more...SpongeBob? I thought this day would never come. Whoo-hoo! Good-bye, SpongeBob! Have a nice life. (exhales her puffiness) Free at last. Free at last.<br><br />
<br />
(cut to Mrs. Puff's Boating School, her name crossed out with paint)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (in classroom) I got Mrs. Puff fired. <br />
<br />
(Sergeant Roderick breaks down the door)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Hello, worthless students. I'm your new instructor. (breaks Mrs. Puff's name tag in pieces) No one's ever failed my class...that's LIVED THROUGH it. I can assure you these next 4 weeks will be the worst years of your miserable lives. Your spines will break, your teeth will ache, your eyes will be bloodshot. (students are freaking out) You will drive out of this school in style, or you will be carted out in your granny's handbasket. Everyone will follow the rules of the class. First rule: No talking.<br><br />
<br />
Nat: Does that mean-- (gets thrown through the door)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Second rule: No eating in my class. (takes out a box of bon-bons) Would anyone care for a bon-bon?<br><br />
<br />
Monroe: Uhh... I'll eat one. (Students gasp. Student #2 walks up to the instructor)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Pick your favorite. (Monroe takes one and eats it) How's it taste?<br><br />
<br />
Monroe: It's a delightful taste sensation.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: '''''NO EATING IN MY CLASSROOM!''''' (throws Monroe through another door) Now, if anyone else is man enough to stay in this class... (everyone but SpongeBob run off) Looks like you're the man... sponge.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I am?<br><br />
<br />
(The scene changes to SpongeBob and Sergeant Roderick outside)<br />
<br />
Roderick: Do you wanna learn how to drive or what?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! I'm ready to drive! (jumps in the boat)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: What do you think you're doing?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Ready for my test, sir.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: (takes SpongeBob out of the boat) You're not ready to drive yet until you learn that first. (shows roads with all sorts of obstacles) This is ''the'' most grueling driving course ever devised. You will learn every turn, bump, and crack on it. You'll start out crawling it.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Crawl?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Hup two. Hup two. Hup two. Hup two. (SpongeBob crawls forward)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Left turn. (turns left) Crack. Bump. Nickel. Hey a nickel!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Keep your eyes on the road, cadet.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: PEBBLE!! Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! (crawls faster and more out of control. Gets the pebble stuck in his hand) Ow!! Wow!! (rolls down the obstacle course into the air, out of the water, then back down where the instructor catches him) Ow!! Wow!! Wow!! Wow!! Aah! (stops screaming) Whew!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: I'm ashamed of you, cadet. Tripped up by a wee pebble. What are you supposed to be learning in my class?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: How to drive, sir?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Affirmative. But before you learn to drive, you must learn to crawl. And then you learn to walk and then you learn <br />
to run. But before you learn to walk, you must learn to crawl. I want you to crawl!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sir, yes, sir!!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Now get out there! (SpongeBob crawls around a hole. SpongeBob carries the instructor on his back) Hut! Hut! (then he stops at a stop sign, and runs in and out of some radioactive waste) Every good boater needs to know his vehicle inside and out. (hands SpongeBob a wrench) Here, go take that boat apart. (SpongeBob takes the boat apart) I'm impressed, son. Put it back together again!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (laughs) Oh, that'll be easy.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Are you sure?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Um, yeah. You just put the jig-a-mahoos on the poo-hicky and uhh... (laughs) I might need a couple minutes. (later, the instructor is sleeping) It's ready, sarge!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Jumpin' jellyfish! (SpongeBob put back together a rocket as it blasts off. Later, the instructor is looking through some binoculars at SpongeBob, who is wearing a hat with mirrors on it. SpongeBob runs up to a red light and stops until it turns green)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Watch for pedestrians. Check mirrors. Observe that speed limit. Watch for pedestri...ans!! (he can't avoid the signs, crashes through a lot of pedestrians shattering them) Whoa! Aah!!! Whoa!! Oh! Oh!! Oh!!! Wow! Oh!!!! Oh!!!!! (slides into the instructor who glares at him) So, umm, how'd I do?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: How'd you do? Why don't you ask the shattered remains of this (holds up a piece of a pedestrian) pedestrian-- '''HOW YOU DID?!!!!?'''<br><br />
<br />
(Much later SpongeBob and the Instructor are seen standing near each other)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Now I know this road course forwards, backwards, and sideways. Am I ready to get behind the wheel?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Not quite. (puts blindfold on SpongeBob) Now do it blindfolded. (SpongeBob gets run over by a boat)<br><br />
<br />
Narrator: Several days later.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: 1003, 1004, 1005. (running with his black shoes.) (stops) Ooh, pebble #143. (steps over pebble) Ha! You will not trip me up pebble #143. 1006, 1007, 1008. (old lady pedestrian pops up) Old lady with a ham sandwich. 1009, 1010, 1011, 1012, 1 th...<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Congratulations. You're ready to get behind the wheel.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Really? I'm ready! I'm ready. I'm... (runs into a pole)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: (now in boat) Let's see what I taught you, laddy.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! (drives boat) Left turn at pebble #143. (makes left turn) (pedestrian kid pops up. SpongeBob stops) Kid with a ball. (SpongeBob continues) Nice boy.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Nice driving. Now parallel park up ahead. (SpongeBob parallel parks) Very good. (now at real exam) Now, boy, the time has come to show Mr. Fitz what you've learned.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! Step 1: seat belts. (puts on seat belt with no problem)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Excellent work, cadet. What's next?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Step 2 would be...ignite engine.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Step 3?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Step 3 would be... (takes out blindfold) ...engage blindfold.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: What? You can't drive a boat with a blindfold on. That's illegal!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: But I can't do it without a blindfold.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Drive, boy! DRIVE! (SpongeBob drives into a gas can, blowing them out of the boating school) Mayday! Mayday! You're off course. (boat drives into 2 buildings then underground. Spurts out from a fire hydrant. Then crashes through a bakery and into a field where Mrs. Puff is painting the scenery)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Oh, I feel so serene now that I'm away from that homicidal maniac, SpongeBob. (Mrs. Puff notices the boat and attempts to paint something really quick. When the boat runs into her, the painting shows SpongeBob, the instructor, and Mr. Fitz fearing their lives)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: The brake, son!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Aye aye, sir. (takes brake apart) There you go, sir. All I had to do was unscrew two little bolts.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: I'm gonna stop this thing. Tell my wife I love her. (jumps in front of the boat in an attempt to stop it) Come get some! (boat runs over him)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Man down! Man down! (SpongeBob drives into the [[Bikini Bottom|city]] and into each building) Uh, sorry, excuse me. Sorry.<br><br />
<br />
[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]: Hey, SpongeBob!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sorry, Patrick, I can't stop the boat right now. (with Patrick's pants blocking his eyes) I CAN'T SEE! I CAN'T SEE!!!! <br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (completely nude, running after SpongeBob) My pants!!!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Hey! I can't see! (dodges traffic and pedestrians. Parallel parks) Did I pass?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Well, if there was a 'destroy the city' part of the test, you would have.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (takes his pants off SpongeBob's head) The nerve of some people.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Sorry, SpongeBob, you failed again. Even our finest instructor could not teach you. Mrs. Puff, you're hired again.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (at boating school) Hey, Mrs. Puff, sorry that I'm unteachable.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: It's okay. Mr. Fitz gave me my teaching certificate back. And your OCA was destroyed in the explosion, so it's as if you never failed.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I got you a welcome back gift, Mrs. Puff. (shows name tag) I found all the pieces and glued them back together. I promise it won't take me a million tries this time. (Mrs. Puff cries and the name tag comes apart)<br />
<br />
{{Transcripts/Season 4}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Transcript]]<br />
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 4]]</div>71.244.109.219http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Mrs._Puff,_You%27re_FiredEpisode Transcript: Mrs. Puff, You're Fired2019-08-02T19:05:50Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Dialogue */</p>
<hr />
<div>{| border="1"<br />
|-bgcolor="#CCCCCC"<br />
!Back Episode Transcript<br />
!Next Episode Transcript<br />
|-<br />
|align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode Transcript: Krusty Towers|Krusty Towers]]<br />
|[[Episode Transcript: Chimps Ahoy|Chimps Ahoy]]<br />
|}<br />
<br />
Episode Article: [[Mrs. Puff, You're Fired (Episode)|Mrs. Puff, You're Fired]]<br />
<br />
==Characters==<br />
*[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br />
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br />
*[[Mrs. Puff]]<br />
*[[Sergeant Roderick]]<br />
*[[Mr. Fitz]]<br />
<br />
==Dialogue==<br />
<br />
(At Mrs. Puff's Boating School)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Good morning, Mrs. Puff. I'm Mr. Fitz. I represent the 'Voting Teachers Accreditation Bureau'. As you know, your teaching certificate is up for renewal. However, we've noticed there have been an unusually large number of failings from this classroom.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: That's impossible. In all my years of teaching, only one student has failed my class.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Yes, but he's failed 1,258,056 times. (shows folder with a bunch of files, making a laughing SpongeBob)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: You don't understand. SpongeBob is...unteachable.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: We cannot blame the students for the incompetence of the teacher.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Honk-honk! Beep-beep! I'm ready to drive. Are you ready for my driving test today, Mrs. Puff?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Ok, Mrs. Puff, if SpongeBob fails this test, you will be replaced.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: (in the boat with SpongeBob and Mr. Fitz) Ok, SpongeBob, let's demonstrate for Mr. Fitz everything I've taught you in <br />
boating school. Now, what's the first thing we do before we start boating?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (snaps fingers) Oh! Seatbelt-a-rooni. One second. (gets tangled in seat-belt then squeezes self through. As <br />
SpongeBob is doing this, Mr. Fitz is writing on his notepad)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Then what do you do?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Start the engine?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Yes.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (starts the boat) Now what do I do?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Drive the boat. (SpongeBob drives into a boat)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Did I pass this time, Mrs. Puff?<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: No, SpongeBob, you failed.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I failed?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: It's not you that failed, SpongeBob. It's Mrs. Puff that's failed you. You are relieved of your teaching duties.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: I won't be teaching SpongeBob anymore? (laughs excitedly) No more...SpongeBob? I thought this day would never come. Whoo-hoo! Good-bye, SpongeBob! Have a nice life. (exhales her puffiness) Free at last. Free at last.<br><br />
<br />
(cut to Mrs. Puff's Boating School, her name crossed out with paint)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (in classroom) I got Mrs. Puff fired. (new teacher breaks down door)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Hello, worthless students. I'm your new instructor. (breaks Mrs. Puff's name tag in pieces) No one's ever failed my class...that's LIVED THROUGH it. I can assure you these next 4 weeks will be the worst years of your miserable lives. Your spines will break, your teeth will ache, your eyes will be bloodshot. (students are freaking out) You will drive out of this school in style, or you will be carted out in your granny's handbasket. Everyone will follow the rules of the class. First rule: No talking.<br><br />
<br />
Nat: Does that mean-- (gets thrown through the door)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Second rule: No eating in my class. (takes out a box of bon-bons) Would anyone care for a bon-bon?<br><br />
<br />
Monroe: Uhh... I'll eat one. (Students gasp. Student #2 walks up to the instructor)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Pick your favorite. (Monroe takes one and eats it) How's it taste?<br><br />
<br />
Monroe: It's a delightful taste sensation.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: '''''NO EATING IN MY CLASSROOM!''''' (throws Monroe through another door) Now, if anyone else is man enough to stay in this class... (everyone but SpongeBob run off) Looks like you're the man... sponge.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I am?<br><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Roderick: (outside) Do you wanna learn how to drive or what?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! I'm ready to drive! (jumps in the boat)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: What do you think you're doing?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Ready for my test, sir.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: (takes SpongeBob out of the boat) You're not ready to drive yet until you learn that first. (shows roads with all sorts of obstacles) This is ''the'' most grueling driving course ever devised. You will learn every turn, bump, and crack on it. You'll start out crawling it.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Crawl?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Hup two. Hup two. Hup two. Hup two. (SpongeBob crawls forward)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Left turn. (turns left) Crack. Bump. Nickel. Hey a nickel!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Keep your eyes on the road, cadet.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: PEBBLE!! Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! (crawls faster and more out of control. Gets the pebble stuck in his hand) Ow!! Wow!! (rolls down the obstacle course into the air, out of the water, then back down where the instructor catches him) Ow!! Wow!! Wow!! Wow!! Aah! (stops screaming) Whew!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: I'm ashamed of you, cadet. Tripped up by a wee pebble. What are you supposed to be learning in my class?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: How to drive, sir?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Affirmative. But before you learn to drive, you must learn to crawl. And then you learn to walk and then you learn <br />
to run. But before you learn to walk, you must learn to crawl. I want you to crawl!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sir, yes, sir!!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Now get out there! (SpongeBob crawls around a hole. SpongeBob carries the instructor on his back) Hut! Hut! (then he stops at a stop sign, and runs in and out of some radioactive waste) Every good boater needs to know his vehicle inside and out. (hands SpongeBob a wrench) Here, go take that boat apart. (SpongeBob takes the boat apart) I'm impressed, son. Put it back together again!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (laughs) Oh, that'll be easy.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Are you sure?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Um, yeah. You just put the jig-a-mahoos on the poo-hicky and uhh... (laughs) I might need a couple minutes. (later, the instructor is sleeping) It's ready, sarge!<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Jumpin' jellyfish! (SpongeBob put back together a rocket as it blasts off. Later, the instructor is looking through some binoculars at SpongeBob, who is wearing a hat with mirrors on it. SpongeBob runs up to a red light and stops until it turns green)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Watch for pedestrians. Check mirrors. Observe that speed limit. Watch for pedestri...ans!! (he can't avoid the signs, crashes through a lot of pedestrians shattering them) Whoa! Aah!!! Whoa!! Oh! Oh!! Oh!!! Wow! Oh!!!! Oh!!!!! (slides into the instructor who glares at him) So, umm, how'd I do?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: How'd you do? Why don't you ask the shattered remains of this (holds up a piece of a pedestrian) pedestrian-- '''HOW YOU DID?!!!!?'''<br><br />
<br />
(Much later SpongeBob and the Instructor are seen standing near each other)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Now I know this road course forwards, backwards, and sideways. Am I ready to get behind the wheel?<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Not quite. (puts blindfold on SpongeBob) Now do it blindfolded. (SpongeBob gets run over by a boat)<br><br />
<br />
Narrator: Several days later.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: 1003, 1004, 1005. (running with his black shoes.) (stops) Ooh, pebble #143. (steps over pebble) Ha! You will not trip me up pebble #143. 1006, 1007, 1008. (old lady pedestrian pops up) Old lady with a ham sandwich. 1009, 1010, 1011, 1012, 1 th...<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Congratulations. You're ready to get behind the wheel.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Really? I'm ready! I'm ready. I'm... (runs into a pole)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: (now in boat) Let's see what I taught you, laddy.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! (drives boat) Left turn at pebble #143. (makes left turn) (pedestrian kid pops up. SpongeBob stops) Kid with a ball. (SpongeBob continues) Nice boy.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Nice driving. Now parallel park up ahead. (SpongeBob parallel parks) Very good. (now at real exam) Now, boy, the time has come to show Mr. Fitz what you've learned.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yes, sir! Step 1: seat belts. (puts on seat belt with no problem)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Excellent work, cadet. What's next?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Step 2 would be...ignite engine.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Step 3?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Step 3 would be... (takes out blindfold) ...engage blindfold.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: What? You can't drive a boat with a blindfold on. That's illegal!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: But I can't do it without a blindfold.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: Drive, boy! DRIVE! (SpongeBob drives into a gas can, blowing them out of the boating school) Mayday! Mayday! You're off course. (boat drives into 2 buildings then underground. Spurts out from a fire hydrant. Then crashes through a bakery and into a field where Mrs. Puff is painting the scenery)<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: Oh, I feel so serene now that I'm away from that homicidal maniac, SpongeBob. (Mrs. Puff notices the boat and attempts to paint something really quick. When the boat runs into her, the painting shows SpongeBob, the instructor, and Mr. Fitz fearing their lives)<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: The brake, son!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Aye aye, sir. (takes brake apart) There you go, sir. All I had to do was unscrew two little bolts.<br><br />
<br />
Roderick: I'm gonna stop this thing. Tell my wife I love her. (jumps in front of the boat in an attempt to stop it) Come get some! (boat runs over him)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Man down! Man down! (SpongeBob drives into the [[Bikini Bottom|city]] and into each building) Uh, sorry, excuse me. Sorry.<br><br />
<br />
[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]: Hey, SpongeBob!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sorry, Patrick, I can't stop the boat right now. (with Patrick's pants blocking his eyes) I CAN'T SEE! I CAN'T SEE!!!! <br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (completely nude, running after SpongeBob) My pants!!!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Hey! I can't see! (dodges traffic and pedestrians. Parallel parks) Did I pass?<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Well, if there was a 'destroy the city' part of the test, you would have.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (takes his pants off SpongeBob's head) The nerve of some people.<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Fitz: Sorry, SpongeBob, you failed again. Even our finest instructor could not teach you. Mrs. Puff, you're hired again.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (at boating school) Hey, Mrs. Puff, sorry that I'm unteachable.<br><br />
<br />
Mrs. Puff: It's okay. Mr. Fitz gave me my teaching certificate back. And your OCA was destroyed in the explosion, so it's as if you never failed.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I got you a welcome back gift, Mrs. Puff. (shows name tag) I found all the pieces and glued them back together. I promise it won't take me a million tries this time. (Mrs. Puff cries and the name tag comes apart)<br />
<br />
{{Transcripts/Season 4}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Transcript]]<br />
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 4]]</div>71.244.109.219http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_What_Ever_Happened_to_SpongeBob%3FEpisode Transcript: What Ever Happened to SpongeBob?2019-07-11T20:32:39Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Dialogue */</p>
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<div>{| border="1"<br />
|-bgcolor="#CCCCCC"<br />
!Back Episode Transcript<br />
!Next Episode Transcript<br />
|-<br />
|align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode Transcript: The Battle of Bikini Bottom|The Battle of Bikini Bottom]]<br />
|[[Episode Transcript: The Two Faces of Squidward|The Two Faces of Squidward]]<br />
|}<br />
<br />
Episode Article: [[What Ever Happened to SpongeBob? (Episode)|What Ever Happened to SpongeBob?]]<br />
<br />
==Characters==<br />
*[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]] ([[CheeseHead BrownPants]])<br />
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br />
*[[Gary the Snail|Gary]] <br />
*[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]]<br />
*[[Sandy Cheeks|Sandy]]<br />
*[[Eugene H. Krabs|Mr. Krabs]]<br />
*[[Bubble Poppin' Boys]]<br />
*[[Perch Perkins]]<br />
*[[Nat]]<br />
*[[Old Man Jenkins]]<br />
*[[Shubie]]<br />
*[[Mailman]]<br />
*[[Help Wanted Lady]]<br />
*Scottish couple<br />
*Former Mayor of New Kelp City<br />
*Citizens of New Kelp City<br />
*[[Bob]]<br />
*[[Patchy the Pirate]]<br />
*[[Potty the Parrot]]<br />
*Mike Wazowski<br />
*Plotagon Patchy<br />
*Plotagon Potty<br />
*1950's Boy (cameo)<br />
<br />
==Dialogue==<br />
(pan over live-action houses)<br />
<br />
Patchy: Hi kids, welcome to the biggest most spectacular episode: Whatever Happened to SpongeBob.<br />
<br />
Potty: Bawk.<br />
<br />
Patchy: Potty! You, kids, watch the episode when I get the potty out.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (frantically jumps out of bed) Good morning, Gary! Good morning, Mister Mailman!<br />
<br />
Mailman: Morning, SpongeBob. Ah, it is a good morning, isn't it. (The Mailman crashes into a truck on his bicycle and flies across the sky) AAAHHH!<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Isn't life great, Gary? Oh, what a beautiful day. I have the best friends...<br />
<br />
Squidward: Ah, stay away! Oh, another SpongeBob nightmare.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: The best job...<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: He's already 10 seconds late. I'm doubting he's not paying for this.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: And, of course, the best pet. <br />
<br />
Gary: Meow. (SpongeBob squeezes Gary in a hug, which causes Gary's shell to break. SpongeBob runs out of his house)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I'm sorry, I'm sorry! (runs into Patrick)<br />
<br />
Patrick: Hi, SpongeBob.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Hey, Patrick! How goes it?<br />
<br />
Patrick: Well, it was great until you showed up. (turns around and shows a cake splattered on his belly)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: What's that?<br />
<br />
Patrick: Oh, just a birthday cake for my mom... (annoyed, throws the squashed cake on the ground) that I spent all day baking. (goes back into his rock. SpongeBob looks on sadly. Patrick briefly opens his rock again) Idiot Boy. (shuts it again)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Oh, that's the first time someone's called me that. Wait, I know who will enjoy my company. (SpongeBob goes to the door of Squidward's house and uses his feet to knock on the door)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Squidward!<br />
<br />
Squidward: (angrily, bursts out of the door) Don't you ever wake me up from my beauty sleep! Do you understand?! Idiot Boy!!!! (slams the door. Cut to the Treedome, where Sandy has invented a robot)<br />
<br />
Sandy: It's all done! My greatest invention yet! (the robot starts to dance)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sandy! What a neat robot! (trips on a log. Some of the water from his helmet goes onto Sandy's robot)<br />
<br />
Sandy: No!! (her robot blows up)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Let me explain. You see... I was passing by the tree, and I thought it'd be funny if I gave you a surprise.<br />
<br />
Sandy: Oh, you gave me a surprise, alright. (lividly, shows the destroyed robot) '''''LOOK AT THE SURPRISE I GOT!!!!!''''' GET OUT OF HERE, IDIOT BOY!! (shoves SpongeBob out the door, slamming it behind him)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (sniffles) I guess that means there's only one place left to go. A place where I am wanted, wherever they like it or not! (Cut to the Krusty Krab) SpongeBob WorkPants reporting for duty, Mr. Krabs.<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Hurry up and get in there, boy! Patties need flipping.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: No worries, captain! (SpongeBob trips on some frying pans) Oops, well, all in a day's work. Now, back to doing what I do best! No way I can mess this up... (SpongeBob slides on a puddle of water and starts screaming)<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: (playing with his dollars, laughing) Mr. Dollar, allow me to introduce you to Mrs. Dollar. (hears SpongeBob's screaming) What the barnacles is going on?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs! (slides and hits Mr Krabs. Mr. Krabs falls in the fryer and gets out immediately) Mr. Krabs, are you OK?<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: I'm fine, as long as me money's OK. (SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs notice both dollars in the fryer) <br />
<br />
Mr. Dollar: (to Mrs. Dollar) Although we know each other a short time, I want you to know... I love you. (both dollars disintegrate as they cry. SpongeBob laughs nervously)<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: (extremely enraged, kicks out SpongeBob) If I were you, I'd get as far away from me as possible-- '''''IDIOT BOY!!!!!!!''''' (shuts the doors. SpongeBob is shocked and alarmed)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I guess that's it, then. If Mr. Krabs is calling me Idiot Boy, it must be true. I know what must be done. (SpongeBob starts crying, his tears creating a river that leads him to his house) I somehow managed to make everyone mad at me. At least you still like me, right, Gary?<br />
<br />
(We see Gary putting a bandage on his back. [[Episode Transcript: The Krusty Sponge|He hisses at SpongeBob]])<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (sighs) I'll miss you too, buddy. There's a year's supply of snail food for you. (walks out of his house and turns around) Goodbye, pineapple. (the chimney blows SpongeBob up in the sky) Goodbye, Squidward. Goodbye, Patrick. Goodbye, Sandy. Goodbye, Bikini Bottom. Goodbye, life as I know it. (he lands on the road next to the sign) Welcome to Bikini Bottom. Population 538. (crosses out the eight with a chalk and puts a seven next to it) Minus one. (he leaves Bikini Bottom down the road) Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! Idiot Boy! (that night, SpongeBob is scared by a bunch of very weird people. He runs for his life, but falls off the cliff upside down, causing him to boink his head on a bunch of rocks until he reaches the bottom of the cliff. Now he's got a long bump on his head) Oooh, boy, that's quite a lump. I better not hit my head again. That might cause a concession. (the things that SpongeBob packed hit him on the head, causing him to faint. Cut to Patrick, who is knocking on SpongeBob's door and drinking a milkshake)<br />
<br />
Sandy: Patrick, where's SpongeBob?<br />
<br />
Patrick: I don't know. I've been knocking on his door for three hours. I need his hot sauce for my milkshake. (drinks his milkshake)<br />
<br />
Sandy: We ain't got time for that. Hi-yah! (brushes through the door)<br />
<br />
Gary: Mrloooow.<br />
<br />
Sandy: Gary? Where are you, little guy? (searches for Gary)<br />
<br />
Gary: Mrloooow.<br />
<br />
Sandy: Gary? Gary? (bumps on some of Gary's snail slime on his bottom. Cut to see that Gary is now extremely huge and overweight)<br />
<br />
Gary: Mrloow.<br />
<br />
Sandy: Gary! What happened to you?<br />
<br />
Gary: Mrlooooooowrooowroowrooow. (Sandy sees a note on Gary's food bowl)<br />
<br />
Sandy: A note. (picks up the note and reads it) ''To whom it may concern: if you found this letter, that means Gary's food bowl is empty and that it needs to be refilled. It also means it's been approximately one year since I've split town, and no one's noticed 'til now. No one needs to worry, I won't bother anyone again. Sincerely, SpongeBob. A.K.A. Idiot Boy.'' (Patrick and Sandy look at each other sadly. Cut to SpongeBob, who wakes up when he hears villagers)<br />
<br />
[[Harold|Villager Man]]: I could use this.<br />
<br />
Villager Woman: Yeah, I like these here.<br />
<br />
Villager Man: This is top quality.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Hello there. (the villagers gasp) What's going on?<br />
<br />
Villager Man: Oh, we thought you were taking a dirt nap, but we organized your clothes for you... SpongeBob.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (looks behind, then turns around to the villagers) Are you talking to me?<br />
<br />
Villager Man: Isn't this your name? (shows SpongeBob's nametag)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I don't know, is it?<br />
<br />
Villager Man: You don't know your name?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: All I know is that I hit my head on some rocks! Now I can't seem to remember anything. (the villagers wink at each other)<br />
<br />
Villager Man: Err, well, then I'll remind you that these are not your clothes, and your name isn't SpongeBob, it's, umm... it's... CheeseHead BrownPants. Ha ha! That's it!<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: CheeseHead, huh? (checks his pockets) Wait a minute, what's this? (shows a bubble bottle)<br />
<br />
Villager Man: Bubbles?!<br />
<br />
(The villagers scream and run away)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I wonder what got into them? (Sees the town called "New Kelp City". Cut to a "BREAKING NEWS" slide)<br />
<br />
Perch Perkins: We interrupt this program for an important announcement. (cut to Perch Perkins in Bikini Bottom, where a crowd of people are panicking) Bikini Bottom is literally in a state of total chaos tonight. (a muscular guy pushes Perch)<br />
<br />
Muscular Guy: (yelling on screen) Literally!! (runs off)<br />
<br />
[[Perch Perkins]]: (gets up weakly with a black eye) We go now to news scene chopper 7. What's up?<br />
<br />
News Chopper: (we see someone flying in a helicopter) Not looking too good out here, Perch. The [[Krusty Krab]] is about to come apart of the henges. Customers are in a rage over not getting their [[Krabby Patty|Krabby Patties]].<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: (running to Squidward) Squidward, where the barnacles is SpongeBob? This place is going down the toilet! Patties need flipping!<br />
<br />
Squidward: If I knew, do you think I'd be standing here getting yelled at by a bunch of morons?<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Don't talk back to your superior officer, you...<br />
<br />
(Both start arguing. Sandy comes in)<br />
<br />
Sandy: Squidward! Mr. Krabs! Y'all seen SpongeBob?<br />
<br />
Squidward: I think we just went through this...<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: What he means to say is, no, we haven't.<br />
<br />
Sandy: Well, apparently, he's left Bikini Bottom, and he ain't coming back. (hands Mr. Krabs the note)<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Let me see that. (begins to read) "To whom that may concern, if you found this letter, that means (muttering...) sincerely... AKA?" "AKA?" "Idiot Boy?" (horrified) "IDIOT BOY?!" It ''is'' SpongeBob! What am I gonna do without me [[SpongeBob|fry cook]]?<br />
<br />
Patrick: What am I gonna do without my best friend? I should never have been mean to you! (starts to cry)<br />
<br />
Sandy: I should have never kicked you out of my house! (starts to cry. Her helmet fills up with tears)<br />
<br />
Squidward: (sadly) If I knew that was the last time I've seen SpongeBob, I would have (happily) slammed the door in his face even '''''harder!!!!!''''' (starts laughing. Everyone except Squidward and Mr. Krabs is very sad. Mr. Krabs pushes the customers out of the Krusty Krab)<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: All right, all right, group meeting. Everybody out! The Krusty Krab's closed until further notice! [[Episode Transcript: SquidBob TentaclePants|(closes the doors)]] Now... (he and the others gather around) how do you propose we find me money-making employee?<br />
<br />
(Cut to SpongeBob in the streets of [[New Kelp City]])<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Whoo, I live in a dump! (bumps into a green fish)<br />
<br />
Fish: Hey, watch where your stepping!<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sorry, sir, I was just-<br />
<br />
Fish: I know what you was doing. You was doing the old "bump into the sucker and reach into his pockets and take his change" routine, but it ain't gonna work this time. You want money? Get a job, you deadbeat!<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I'm a jobless deadbeat? What a sad existence I don't remember I live. (fade to black. Cut back to SpongeBob. His tummy is grumbling) Ooh, seems like I'm running on empty. (checks his pockets and sighs) Not a penny to my name. Well, I guess if I want to fill the hole in my gut, I'll need to fill a job somewhere. (checks a bank sign that says "Help Wanted") Help wanted?<br />
<br />
[[Help Wanted Lady]]: Well, Mr.... BrownPants... you seem to have left this entire application blank.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (laughs) I can't remember a thing.<br />
<br />
Help Wanted Lady: Well, do you have any special skills?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Special skills... oh, I can do this! (blows a bubble)<br />
<br />
Help Wanted Lady: (screams) Oh, what do you think you're doing?! (kicks out SpongeBob) Sorry, sir, but we run a respectable business here! (she slams the door)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Okay, I guess they don't want you blowing bubbles, unless it directly relates to the job at hand. (SpongeBob is hired as a builder) Thanks for the job, boss! You won't be disappointed.<br />
<br />
Builder: That's real sweet, BrownPants, but I don't hear that hammer pounding.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (pounding the hammer while flying on a bubble) Then this might be music to your ears.<br />
<br />
Builder: (sees the bubble) Neptune's son, what are you doing? (gets down from the building) You aren't doing that on my building site! You're fired! (the bubble pops and SpongeBob falls down)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I do not understand this. What is wrong with this city? Maybe it's not the city. Maybe it's me. (looks at a man from ''[[Episode Transcript: All That Glitters|All That Glitters]]'') Hey, mister, Look at me! Mister, look at me! Is there something wrong with me? (shows a gruesome look on his face. The man screams and runs away. Cut to the Krusty Krab)<br />
<br />
Sandy: Listen up, y'all! I got a plan to bring back SpongeBob.<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: You do?<br />
<br />
Sandy: Yup, and it involves this. (shows a [[Sponge-Tracker|device]]) It'll track any sponge within a 50-mile radius.<br />
<br />
Squidward: So, you're saying this thing can actually find SpongeBob?<br />
<br />
Sandy: You got it, [[Squidward|SquidCakes]], but it's gonna take all of us to find-- (Squidward smashes the device with a hammer.)<br />
<br />
Squidward: Oops, I dropped it. (Mr. Krabs is enraged. His nose rises and blows up like a balloon, then bursts.)<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: (shouting furiously) '''''MR. SQUIDWARD!!!!!!!!!''''' This device was me last chance to get this place back into ship shape. And since you destroyed it, I am ordering you to find SpongeBob!<br />
<br />
Squidward: (laughs) I wouldn't seek out that twit for all the leotards of the sea.<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: If you don't find him, you'll be out of a job forever.<br />
<br />
Squidward: Ha! Is that your version of a threat?<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Oh, Squidward, don't forget your retirement gift.<br />
<br />
Squidward: Mr. Krabs, I am not interested in any- (gasps) Is that a handcrafted jewel-encrusted ornamental egg? That'll complete my collection! Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, Mr. Krabs!<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Not so fast! (pushes Squidward) Bring back me number one fry cook first.<br />
<br />
(Cut to SpongeBob, who is cold in the streets of New Kelp City. He goes to get warm near a fire)<br />
<br />
Fish: Real drag, isn't it? Having to stand around the fire for warmth every night?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yeah.<br />
<br />
Other Fish: Heh, not for us... we're just waiting in line for a new [[Games We Play|video game]].<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I guess I am just a jobless deadbeat. (sighs) You guys mind if I bubble?<br />
<br />
Fish: (frightened) You can't do that here!!<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: But... bubbles will steady the ol' nerves. Watch. (blows a bubble) See? Feeling better already.<br />
<br />
(everyone who sees the bubble screams and runs away.)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: What could possibly be wrong with practicing the bubble arts? Seems like a harmless activity. (laughs)<br />
<br />
(SpongeBob gets ready to blow another bubble, when he is approached by a gang who are snapping their fingers. They grab SpongeBob)<br />
<br />
Bubble Poppin' Boy: Do you have any... (the others continue snapping) I think we've made our point with the snapping! (They stop snapping) As I was saying... do you have any idea who we are?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Um, wait... err, um... don't tell me, um...<br />
<br />
Bubble Poppin' Boy: Don't answer. (laughs) I'll show ya. (turns around to show the back of his shirt, which says "Bubble Poppin' Boys") We call us the [[Bubble Poppin' Boys]]. And article 1 of our charter prohibits bubble blowing on our turf. (pops the bubble. Its water gets in his eyes and he gets angry, showing his red eyes) You see why we don't allow bubbles in our city? Fortunately, we have ways of dealing with careless bubble blowers like you. Let's rough him up, boys! (the gang is ready to beat SpongeBob, but he runs away)<br />
<br />
Bubble Poppin' Boy: Where'd he go? (sees SpongeBob run) After him!!<br />
<br />
(SpongeBob tries to hide from the Bubble Poppin' Boys, but they surround him. SpongeBob blows four bubbles to make a stairway. One of the Bubble Poppin' Boys climbs up a street light. SpongeBob then blows a bubble raft and hops on it)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Ah, I'll be making this getaway in comfort. (The Bubble Poppin' Boys try to shoot down the bubble raft with slingshots. SpongeBob blows a bubble paddle and paddles away, but one of the slingshots pop the bubble raft and paddle, causing SpongeBob to fall. SpongeBob lands on the street safely, but the bottle of bubble soap spills, and the bubble wand falls in the sewer. The Bubble Poppin' Boys are running towards SpongeBob, but he sticks his hand into the spilled bubble soap and blows a big bubble to trap the Bubble Poppin' Boys, causing them to float up and out of New Kelp City)<br />
<br />
Man: You- you did it! (grunts and runs over to SpongeBob) Do you realize what you've done?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: No.<br />
<br />
Man: You have freed the city. Citzens of New Kelp, come out of the shadows, 'cause CheeseBoy kicked the Bubble Poppin' gang right out of town! (All of the citizens of New Kelp City come out and blow bubbles) <br />
<br />
All: Thank you, [[CheeseHead BrownPants|CheeseBoy]]!<br />
<br />
Man #2: What an amazing gift CheeseBoy has given us.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Actually, it's CheeseHead. (a car appears. Its horn honks as a window rolls down, and the mayor of New Kelp City appears)<br />
<br />
Mayor: Well, CheeseHead, this is a historic day for New Kelp City. You have rid this city of the Bubble Poppin' Boys, and restored bubble-blowing to the streets. (laughs) Something I wasn't able to do for 20 years as mayor. For this, I appoint you... (puts his hat on SpongeBob's head) mayor of New Kelp City!<br />
<br />
All: (lifting up SpongeBob) All hail mayor CheeseHead!! (SpongeBob smiles. Cut to Patrick, Sandy and Squidward, who are still searching for SpongeBob)<br />
<br />
Sandy: SpongeBob!<br />
<br />
Patrick: SpongeBob!<br />
<br />
Sandy: SpongeBob!<br />
<br />
Patrick: (lifts up the road) Buddy? You there? (puts the road down)<br />
<br />
Sandy: SpongeBob! (points at the truck stop) Maybe someone at that truck stop has seen our porous little buddy.<br />
<br />
Patrick: SpongeBob! (they walk to the truck stop)<br />
<br />
Sandy: There he is, guys!<br />
<br />
Patrick: Huh? SpongeBob! (laughs and runs into [[Evelyn]]) Oh, I knew I'd find you, buddy! Look at you. You haven't changed a bit. Let's go home and eat a gallon of seanut butter.<br />
<br />
Sandy: That's not SpongeBob, Patrick. There's SpongeBob. (Patrick drops Evelyn. She points to the newspaper carrier)<br />
<br />
Patrick: (yells) I'll get ya out of this cage, buddy! (breaks the glass with a brick and hugs the newspaper) You're safe now in my arms. (notices that the picture of SpongeBob on the newspaper is gone) Huh? Where'd you go now? (cries)<br />
<br />
Sandy: Uh, Pat? All the ink came off on your belly.<br />
<br />
Patrick: Oh.<br />
<br />
Sandy: Now let's see what that little critter's up to. (reads) New mayor of... (gasps) SpongeBob's mayor of New Kelp City!<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Citizens of New Kelp City, I can't say that I blame you, but I don't know much about politics or balanced budgets, but I do know this, while I am wearing the mayor's hat it will always be safe to blow bubbles on the streets of New Kelp, or my name isn't [[CheeseHead BrownPants]]!!<br />
<br />
Sandy: CheeseHead BrownPants?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: New Kelp City has brown-pants mania!<br />
<br />
Sandy: Hang on a minute. I don't mean to put a damper on the mood here but Bikini Bottom needs you back, Spongebob.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: What's that?<br />
<br />
Sandy: Well, I'm sorry I yelled at you, buddy.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Oh, this is a surprise.<br />
<br />
Sandy: Surprised I found you?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: No, surprised at seeing a talking weasel.<br />
<br />
Sandy: It's me, Sandy. Don't pretend you don't remember me, SpongeBob.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Sandy. But I'd probably remember an underwater, talking weasel.<br />
<br />
Sandy: You may not remember the weasel but you haven't forgotten your best friend, have you?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I have no idea how that got there. All I remember is hitting my head, blowing some bubbles and now, poof, I'm mayor.<br />
<br />
Sandy: You must've lost your memory when you hit your head. You'll just have to come back with us to Bikini Bottom. The familiar surroundings will bring your memory right back.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Uh, sorry, weasel girl, I can't leave. These people need my leadership.<br />
<br />
Sandy: Spongebob, wait! Don't just stand there, get in. Squidward?<br />
<br />
Squidward: Hurry up! (the trio enter the limo) Decorative egg, here I come. (limo is leaving New Kelp City, then reaches the Krusty Krab) Here it is.<br />
<br />
Sandy: You must recognize this place.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Nope.<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Don't recognize the Krusty Krab? Stop your kidding, boy. And start frying up them patties.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I was a fry cook before?<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Aye, the best in the business. Now get flipping.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Look, guys, as much as I'd love to toil the days away flipping burgers I think I'll just go back to my modest job as mayor of a major city.<br />
<br />
Squidward: Whoo-hoo-hoo, SpongeBob's leaving for real this time! Krabs, I brought back your number one fry cook, you gotta pay up.<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: All right, Mr. Squidward, a deal's a deal. Here's your fancy egg.<br />
<br />
Squidward: Ohh, It's BEAUTIFUL!!! (Squidward sobs with excitement and is admiring his egg until he slips on a greasy spatula, which sends the egg flying through the air) '''''STOOOOOP!!!!!!''''' (when SpongeBob starts to leave the Krusty Krab, the egg shatters against the back of his head. Squidward is upset that his egg is destroyed, as a bump rises on SpongeBob's head)<br />
<br />
Sandy: You okay, SpongeBob?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Yeah, just a bit of a headache, Sandy. Hey, I remember this place!<br />
<br />
Sandy: SpongeBob's back!<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: We're really sorry we ran you out of town, boy. But we're glad you're back.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I'd really love to stay, but the people of New Kelp City need their mayor. Goodbye, everyone.<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Huh? What? Oh, not again.<br />
<br />
Squidward: He's leaving again!<br />
<br />
Perch Perkins: Stop what you're doing and don't go out that door. This is a KNKC special report. (Shows BBN logo) Panic in the streets of New Kelp City as rampant bubbles bring visibility down to 0. The angry citizens here blame the apocalyptic scene on Mayor CheeseHead BrownPants and his newly-enacted bubble policy. (another muscular fish pushes him on the screen)<br />
<br />
Construction Fish: If I ever see Mayor Brown Pants again I'm gonna grab his little, yellow neck and literally rip his throat out! (screen changes to "We Are Experiencing Technical Difficulties. Thank You for watching this Channel.") <br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Where's SpongeBob?<br />
<br />
(SpongeBob is in the Krusty Krab kitchen)<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (rings a bell) Order up! (hands a Krabby Patty on plate)<br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Who wants to be a dumb old mayor when you're the best fry cook in town?<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: And how could I ever leave behind my bestest friend?<br />
<br />
Patrick: Krabby Patty! SpongeBob, another masterpiece.<br />
<br />
Sandy: It's great to have you back, Spongy.<br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Looks like I'm back in Bikini Bottom forever.<br />
<br />
(In the background cows are mooing. Squidward opens his head, removes his brain, and throws into the trash)<br />
<br />
{{Transcripts/Season 5}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 5]]</div>71.244.109.219http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=The_Sewers_of_Bikini_Bottom_(Episode)The Sewers of Bikini Bottom (Episode)2019-05-04T15:31:27Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Plot */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{cleanup}}<br />
{{EpInfo|The Sewers of Bikini Bottom|Titlecard The Sewers of Bikini Bottom.jpg|194b|9|November 11, 2015|Patrick! The Game|SpongeBob LongPants}}<br />
{{EpInfo2|SpongeBob SquarePants|Tom Kenny}}<br />
{{EpInfo2|Squidward Tentacles|Rodger Bumpass}}<br />
{{EpInfo2|Mr. Krabs|Clancy Brown}}<br />
|- bgcolor="ffffff"<br />
|colspan="2"|[[Image:The Sewers of Bikini Bottom - Image.png|center|300px]]<br />
|}<br />
<br />
'''The Sewers of Bikini Bottom''' is an episode from Season 9.<br />
<br />
== Characters ==<br />
* [[SpongeBob SquarePants]]<br />
* [[Squidward Tentacles]]<br />
* [[Mr. Krabs]]<br />
* [[Crupski]]<br />
* [[Charlton Hawkfish]]<br />
* [[Sewer Snake]]<br />
* [[Lampreys]]<br />
* [[Mr. Krabs' Grandma]] (in a picture)<br />
* [[Pearl Krabs]] (in a picture)<br />
* [[Old Man Jenkins]] (cameo)<br />
* [[Canoer]]<br />
<br />
== Place == <br />
* [[Krusty Krab]]<br />
* [[Krusty Krab Stadium]]<br />
* The Sewer<br />
<br />
== Plot ==<br />
The episode opens at the Krusty Krab where SpongeBob and Squidward are working and Mr. Krabs comes to tell them that Bikini Bottom's newest stadium will be named after the Krusty Krab. He then tells them that employees have to stay at the Krusty Krab to keep working. Mr. Krabs puts Squidward in charge of the Krusty Krab while he is gone and he leaves. SpongeBob wakes up a sleeping Squidward asking for jobs to do. Squidward tries to find some work but notices SpongeBob has did most of them already. Squidward then has SpongeBob clean some more but he does all of the work in seconds. Squidward, after running out of ideas, tasks SpongeBob to flush things down the toilet and SpongeBob goes into the bathroom to do so. Squidward realizes his mistake and tries to stop SpongeBob. SpongeBob flushes a mop down the toilet and Squidward finds it exciting. He and SpongeBob then flush various objects down the toilet but are horrified after accidentally flushing down Mr. Krabs' safe which contains the Krabby Patty Secret Formula. SpongeBob decides to flush himself to go and get it and Squidward, realizing he needs SpongeBob to cook the Krabby Patties for the customers, follows SpongeBob down the toilet. <br />
<br />
At the Krusty Krab Stadium, Mr. Krabs can be seen talking to Crupski and Charlton Hawkfish about Mr. Krabs buying the stadium. Customers outside are complaining about the plumbing. As a result, Charlton is angered to not only see that the pipes have a reducer in them, but are also made out of cardboard. Charlton worries that the pipes won't hold but Crupski says building them cheap saved a lot of money, much to the delight of Mr. Krabs. Meanwhile, SpongeBob and Squidward make it to the sewers where they begin their search for the safe. They manage to spot the safe where it gets stuck in the pipes. As Squidward tries to reach for it, the safe gets unstuck and floats away. Squidward fails to grab it again and a couple of lampreys bite his hands. SpongeBob helps get the lampreys off and spots the safe floating in the distance. SpongeBob and Squidward go after it once more and, suddenly, a large sewer snake emerges from the water.<br />
<br />
Back at the stadium, Charlton warns Mr. Krabs and Crupski that it's time for the "halftime wave" where every toilet flushes at once. Mr. Krabs ignores this and continues to watch the game. Back in the sewers, SpongeBob and Squidward are seen running away from the sewer snake but end up running inside of it. Frightened, Squidward starts to run around in a complete panic. Noticing that Squidward's running is tickling the snake, SpongeBob helps by joining in on the running, and while running, he spots the safe nearby trying to inform Squidward of it. Eventually, both Squidward and SpongeBob's running prove to be too much for the sewer snake and cause it to vomit up SpongeBob, Squidward, and the safe where it lands on Squidward's head. Meanwhile, everyone at the Krusty Krab Stadium start to use the restrooms where Charlton warns that the pipes are going to burst, but Crupski (remaining oblivious to the emergency) assures Charlton that everything will be fine. However, the pipes do burst and large amounts of water pour inside of the stadium. Charlton dives underwater and activates his fail safe which is a giant plunger that plunges away all of the water. Charlton blames Mr. Krabs and Crupski's cheapness for causing the problems, leaving Crupski mildly foolish (though Mr. Krabs doesn't believe this), and the sewer snake rises above in the stadium. However, Charlton expertly uses his nose to pop the sewer snake and it goes back into the sewers. SpongeBob and Squidward end up back in the Krusty Krab in the safe where they are ready to get back to work. However, the customers all run out screaming.<br />
<br />
==Trivia/Goofs==<br />
* This was the last episode to premiere in 2015.<br />
* This was the first episode [[Kaz]] wrote since "[[I Had an Accident (Episode)|I Had an Accident]]" and his first credited episode since "[[SpongeBob Meets the Strangler (Episode)|SpongeBob Meets the Strangler]]".<br />
* This was also the first episode that [[Dave Cunningham]] was officially credited for working on as storyboard supervisor.<br />
* Things that were flushed down the toilet: a mop, rolls of toilet paper, a batch of Krabby Patties, a toaster with toasts, tableware, a cash register (possibly [[Cashy]]), a photo of Mr. Krabs, an armchair, a trashcan, a clock, two barrels, an anchor, a safe, SpongeBob and Squidward.<br />
** Timelineut to be flushed, but he was put back into his seat.<br />
* We see Squidward and SpongeBob through things down the toilet, and flush them. One of the things is the cash register, yet in later footage, its still at the boat counter.<br />
* Squidward commented that he flushed SpongeBob down the toilet. However, SpongeBob flushed himself down the toilet.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Season9}}</div>71.244.109.219http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=The_Sewers_of_Bikini_Bottom_(Episode)The Sewers of Bikini Bottom (Episode)2019-05-04T15:29:51Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Plot */</p>
<hr />
<div>{{cleanup}}<br />
{{EpInfo|The Sewers of Bikini Bottom|Titlecard The Sewers of Bikini Bottom.jpg|194b|9|November 11, 2015|Patrick! The Game|SpongeBob LongPants}}<br />
{{EpInfo2|SpongeBob SquarePants|Tom Kenny}}<br />
{{EpInfo2|Squidward Tentacles|Rodger Bumpass}}<br />
{{EpInfo2|Mr. Krabs|Clancy Brown}}<br />
|- bgcolor="ffffff"<br />
|colspan="2"|[[Image:The Sewers of Bikini Bottom - Image.png|center|300px]]<br />
|}<br />
<br />
'''The Sewers of Bikini Bottom''' is an episode from Season 9.<br />
<br />
== Characters ==<br />
* [[SpongeBob SquarePants]]<br />
* [[Squidward Tentacles]]<br />
* [[Mr. Krabs]]<br />
* [[Crupski]]<br />
* [[Charlton Hawkfish]]<br />
* [[Sewer Snake]]<br />
* [[Lampreys]]<br />
* [[Mr. Krabs' Grandma]] (in a picture)<br />
* [[Pearl Krabs]] (in a picture)<br />
* [[Old Man Jenkins]] (cameo)<br />
* [[Canoer]]<br />
<br />
== Place == <br />
* [[Krusty Krab]]<br />
* [[Krusty Krab Stadium]]<br />
* The Sewer<br />
<br />
== Plot ==<br />
The episode opens at the Krusty Krab where SpongeBob and Squidward are working and Mr. Krabs comes to tell them that Bikini Bottom's newest stadium will be named after the Krusty Krab. He then tells them that employees have to stay at the Krusty Krab to keep working. Mr. Krabs puts Squidward in charge of the Krusty Krab while he is gone and he leaves. SpongeBob wakes up a sleeping Squidward asking for jobs to do. Squidward tries to find some work but notices SpongeBob has did most of them already. Squidward then has SpongeBob clean some more but he does all of the work in seconds. Squidward, after running out of ideas, tasks SpongeBob to flush things down the toilet and SpongeBob goes into the bathroom to do so. Squidward realizes his mistake and tries to stop SpongeBob. SpongeBob flushes a mop down the toilet and Squidward finds it exciting. He and SpongeBob then flush various objects down the toilet but are horrified after accidentally flushing down Mr. Krabs' safe which contains the Krabby Patty Secret Formula. SpongeBob decides to flush himself to go and get it and Squidward, realizing he needs SpongeBob to cook the Krabby Patties for the customers, follows SpongeBob down the toilet. <br />
<br />
At the Krusty Krab Stadium, Mr. Krabs can be seen talking to Crupski and Charlton Hawkfish about Mr. Krabs buying the stadium. Customers outside are complaining about the plumbing. As a result, Charlton is angered to not only see that the pipes have a reducer in them, but are also made out of cardboard. Charlton worries that the pipes won't hold but Crupski says building them cheap saved a lot of money, much to the delight of Mr. Krabs. Meanwhile, SpongeBob and Squidward make it to the sewers where they begin their search for the safe. They manage to spot the safe where it gets stuck in the pipes. As Squidward tries to reach for it, the safe gets unstuck and floats away. Squidward fails to grab it again and a couple of lampreys bite his hands. SpongeBob helps get the lampreys off and spots the safe floating in the distance. SpongeBob and Squidward go after it once more and, suddenly, a large sewer snake emerges from the water.<br />
<br />
Back at the stadium, Charlton warns Mr. Krabs and Crupski that it's time for the "halftime wave" where every toilet flushes at once. Mr. Krabs ignores this and continues to watch the game. Back in the sewers, SpongeBob and Squidward are seen running away from the sewer snake but end up running inside of it. Frightened, Squidward starts to run around in a complete panic. Noticing that Squidward's running is tickling the snake, SpongeBob helps by joining in on the running, and while running, he spots the safe nearby trying to inform Squidward of it. Eventually, both Squidward and SpongeBob's running prove to be too much for the sewer snake and cause it to vomit up SpongeBob, Squidward, and the safe where it lands on Squidward's head. Meanwhile, everyone at the Krusty Krab Stadium start to use the restrooms where Charlton warns that the pipes are going to burst, but Crupski (remaining oblivious to the emergency) assures Charlton that everything will be fine. However, the pipes do burst and large amounts of water pour inside of the stadium. Charlton dives underwater and activates his fail safe which is a giant plunger that plunges away all of the water. Charlton blames Mr. Krabs and Crupski's cheapness for causing the problems, leaving Crupski mildly awkward (though Mr. Krabs doesn't believe this), and the sewer snake rises above in the stadium. However, Charlton expertly uses his nose to pop the sewer snake and it goes back into the sewers. SpongeBob and Squidward end up back in the Krusty Krab in the safe where they are ready to get back to work. However, the customers all run out screaming.<br />
<br />
==Trivia/Goofs==<br />
* This was the last episode to premiere in 2015.<br />
* This was the first episode [[Kaz]] wrote since "[[I Had an Accident (Episode)|I Had an Accident]]" and his first credited episode since "[[SpongeBob Meets the Strangler (Episode)|SpongeBob Meets the Strangler]]".<br />
* This was also the first episode that [[Dave Cunningham]] was officially credited for working on as storyboard supervisor.<br />
* Things that were flushed down the toilet: a mop, rolls of toilet paper, a batch of Krabby Patties, a toaster with toasts, tableware, a cash register (possibly [[Cashy]]), a photo of Mr. Krabs, an armchair, a trashcan, a clock, two barrels, an anchor, a safe, SpongeBob and Squidward.<br />
** Timelineut to be flushed, but he was put back into his seat.<br />
* We see Squidward and SpongeBob through things down the toilet, and flush them. One of the things is the cash register, yet in later footage, its still at the boat counter.<br />
* Squidward commented that he flushed SpongeBob down the toilet. However, SpongeBob flushed himself down the toilet.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
{{Season9}}</div>71.244.109.219http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Restraining_SpongeBobEpisode Transcript: Restraining SpongeBob2018-12-05T21:44:32Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Dialogue */</p>
<hr />
<div>{| border="1"<br />
|-bgcolor="#CCCCCC"<br />
!Back Episode Transcript<br />
!Next Episode Transcript<br />
|-<br />
|align="center" rowspan="3"|[[Episode Transcript: Bubble Buddy Returns|Bubble Buddy Returns]]<br />
|[[Episode Transcript: Fiasco!|Fiasco!]]<br />
|}<br />
<br />
Episode Article: [[Restraining SpongeBob (Episode)|Restraining SpongeBob]]<br />
<br />
==Characters==<br />
*[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br />
*[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]]<br />
*[[Eugene H. Krabs|Mr. Krabs]]<br />
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br />
<br />
==Dialogue==<br />
<br />
(Squidward is lying in bed, asleep and he wakes up to a loud noise)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: What the...? (We see SpongeBob outside grinding his spatula on a rotating wheel and Squidward opens the window) SpongeBob, do you mind?!?! (Breaks the window off its hinges and throws it at SpongeBob. The window hits the rotating wheel instead and it bounces off and hits Squidward in the face. From the impact, he loses his balance and falls out the window, he then bounces on his head and then bounces off of SpongeBob's pineapple, his testicles land over SpongeBob's eyes, causing SpongeBob to finally notice Squidward)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Oh! Hey, Squidward. Whatcha doin'?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Gets back up) What am I doing?! What are '''''you''''' doing?!?!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I am sharpening my trusty spatula. Speaking of which, are you gonna stick around for morning fry-cook calisthenics?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Cala-what?<br><br />
<br />
(SpongeBob then proceeds in a series of rather ridiculous stretches as Squidward walks back to his house to lock the door, Squidward then starts walking to work)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Catches up with Squidward) Walking to work, huh, Squidward?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Irritated) Go away.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Can I walk with you?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Please?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No. (The last two lines are repeated several times as they both walk, Squidward finally gets fed up with SpongeBob's repetitious begging as they enter the Krusty Krab) I said ''NO!'' I will not walk to work with yo--! (Notices he is in the Krusty Krab)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Okay. Maybe tomorrow, then!<br><br />
<br />
(Scene fades out, the next scene shows Squidward at the register with a customer)<br><br />
<br />
Customer: I'll have 2 Krabby Patties.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Okay. And would you like cheese on--(Stops at a noise that sounds like someone breaking wind)<br><br />
<br />
Customer: (Sounding disgusted) Do you...need a break or something?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Nervously) Huh? Oh, no! No-ho, that was not me, I swear. (The same sound repeats, the customer walks away with Squidward stuttering and begging nervously, Squidward walks into the kitchen where SpongeBob is unsuccessfully attempting to squeeze mustard onto a Krabby Patty) SpongeBob! (Snatches the mustard bottle from SpongeBob and opens it) It's empty! (Shoves the mustard bottle into SpongeBob's eye) See? Empty!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Amazed) Wow, Squidward! How'd you know that? (Squidward takes the mustard bottle out of SpongeBob's eye)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Well, let's see. Maybe 'cause I have a ''brain?'' (While saying this, he leans on the grill)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Ohh! Squidward? Uh, the grill is on.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Oh, really? And do you think that I don't know that this grill is--? (He screams at the sight of his hand burning on the grill and then he then runs around SpongeBob)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I gotta do something. (He removes the mop and then takes the bucket of water, Squidward runs to the right] Okay, Squidward, this should help. (SpongeBob turns the bucket sideways and is ready pour it on Squidward but accidentally spills the water, Squidward slips on the puddle of water and is flying in mid-air) Don't worry, Squidward, I'll catch you. (Gets out his jellyfishing net and holds it up to catch Squidward, but Squidward goes in the net and hits the wall snapping the net in the process. Squidward then falls into a deep fryer, SpongeBob screams and goes over to the deep fryer and picks up the net with Squidward in it, now Squidward looks like an ice cream cone when he's fried and we see a close up of the fried Squidward) I can fix this. (Runs but he accidentally trips on the mop on the floor, hits a tin cupboard and bounces off and slams into the counter, Squidward is sent flying and into a customer's Krabby Patty taking it's place, the customer takes a bite out of Squidward causing him and the customer to scream, the customer throws away Squidward who flies in the other direction, SpongeBob runs to intercept him) This time I gotcha. (Squidward hits SpongeBob's face and bounces off, finally crashing into a fountain soda machine, SpongeBob and Mr. Krabs gasps, Squidward lies there muttering nonsense as the soda sprays on him. Mr. Krabs rushes over to the mess)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: (Devastated) Me soder machine!!! (Cries)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Squidward, can you hear me? (Holds up two fingers) How many fingers am I...<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Freaking out) NOOOO!!!!! (Smacks SpongeBob away and continues screaming, then leaps behind a table, destroying it)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Squidward?<br><br />
<br />
(Squidward screams and whacks two customers away, he climbs up the wall and looks down at the floor)<br> <br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Wow, you really sent him over the edge this time.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Technically, I drove him up the wall.<br><br />
<br />
(A time card reading "One shift later..." appears)<br><br />
<br />
Narrator: One shift later...<br><br />
<br />
(Scene cuts to the next day. SpongeBob is mopping the floor when Squidward arrives with a blue folder)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Smirking) Oh, SpongeBob, I got a present for you.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Gives a big smile with twinkling eyes) Present? A present? For me? (Eagerly runs up to Squidward)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Now, now. Calm down. I've should've given this to you a long time ago. (knocks SpongeBob down and gives him a piece of paper from the folder)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Wow, Squidward! My very own...(Looks at the restraining order) Restraining order. Uh...what is that?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Perhaps my lawyers should explain. (Points over to his lawyers Harry, Combover, and Bald)<br><br />
<br />
Harry: We are the law offices of Harry, Combover, and Bald! Specializing in restraining order logical law (Harry, Combover, and Bald all turn to their left) and here to tell one Mr. SquarePants...<br><br />
<br />
Harry, Combover, & Bald: (All turning and pointing at SpongeBob) You've been served!<br><br />
<br />
Spongebob: Served? I don't understand. Squidward, what are these guy-- (Before he can reach Squidward, he is stopped by Harry and Combover. Bald pushes Squidward away from him)<br><br />
<br />
Bald: Per paragraph 3 of the restraining order, you may no longer speak to our client. (Draws a dot circle on the ground around Squidward with chalk) Likewise, you may not come within 15 feet of Mr. Squidward at any time. Any infractions of these statues will result in... serious... jail... time!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Nervously) Can you make Krabby Patties for loyal Krusty Krab patrons during... "serious jail time?"<br><br />
<br />
Bald: Huh?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Whispers indistinctly in Bald's ear)...and...(Whispers some more)<br><br />
<br />
Bald: No.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Screams in fear) No! I don't wanna go!<br><br />
<br />
Combover: Well then, follow the guidelines we've explained and you won't have to.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Uh, sirs? If I can't speak to, or get within fifteen feet of Squidward, how'll we get anything done around here?<br><br />
<br />
Harry, Combover, and Bald: (Once again, all pointing at SpongeBob) That's not our problem. (All fly off)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Walks in front of the dotted line) Hmmm...<br><br />
<br />
(Scene changes to SpongeBob cooking Krabby Patties and putting them on a long hand-made spatula made of wood and mops)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: There we go! 3 Krabby Patties, 2 large Kelpy Colas, and 3 fries ready to be served. (Rings the order bell and tries to give the order to Squidward, but Squidward puts up a glass window) Hmm? (Carries the order on the hand-made spatula with strings and another piece of wood on the other side of Squidward also in front of the door. Mr. Krabs comes in and walks right into it and it knocks him on the ground) Oops! (Runs over to Mr. Krabs) Sorry about that Mr. Krabs! It's just so hard to get this food to Squidward without violating this restraining order. (Shows him the restraining order)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Let me see that! (Takes the restraining order and wipes the mustard off him then gives it back to SpongeBob) Thank you! Look, boy, I don't know what in coral cabins a restraining order is. But I DO know whatever's goin' on here clearly ain't workin'! Now I want this ship sailin' smoothly on the double! Or I'll be forced to remove more gold stars from your employee performance chart! (Takes away a star from SpongeBob's Employee Chart then walks away)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Screams) Think, SpongeBob, think! (Gasps then smiles) I got it!<br><br />
<br />
(Cuts to Patrick giggling whilst moving closer and closer to Squidward)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Reading a book) Oh, if I ignore it, maybe it'll go away. (Patrick is still giggling) I thought not. (Closes the book) Okay, Patrick, what? What? WHAT?!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (Still giggling) Notice anything... (Smacks Squidward's nose with the Krusty Krab hat he is wearing) ...different? (Pointing at his hat) Huh? Huh?! A hint! (Takes out a drawing held upside-down of the Krusty Krab hat pointing to it and his hat)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Patrick! I am NOT not paying you to stand around and play "Guess What the Idiot's Thinking" with Squidward! Get back to work!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Yeah, Patrick! Get back to...what?! ''Work?!'' Oh, no! No, no, no! Krabs! (Walks past SpongeBob who moves backwards then forwards) Mr. Krabs!<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Why all the shiverin' of the timbers, Mr. Squidward?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Mr. Krabs! This will not stand!<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: It'll stand. (Smugly) Oh, unless you'd rather talk with SpongeBob. (Goes back into his office)<br><br />
<br />
(Squidward grunts angrily then the scene makes a bubble transition over to a customer buying a Krabby Patty. Squidward hands Patrick the ticket and Patrick takes it to SpongeBob who then makes the Krabby Patties then hands it to Patrick. Patrick takes the order to Squidward who then gives it to the customer)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: What?<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Can I watch you work?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Please?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No. (The two previous lines are repeated several more times, as Squidward gets fed up with Patrick asking)<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Pretty please?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No! No, no, ''no!'' (Growls. Patrick continues to follow him) Go away, Patrick! Go away, Patrick! Patrick! Patrick! Patrick! (Washes his hands when Patrick appears in the mirror) Patrick! (Patrick touches his hat) Patrick! (Pushes a button on the cash register and Patrick springs out) Patrick! (Starts walking with Patrick following behind him very closely) Patrick! (Using the restroom with Patrick beside him) Patrick! (Starts sweating and shivering with Mr. Krabs now beside him)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Mr. Squidward?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Screams)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Time for your break. (Walks off)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Ah...don't mind if I do. (Sits down and sighs) No better way to spend a break then with a little cool jazz. (Takes out the box that holds his clarinet and tries to play it, but it isn't there) Huh?<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (Comes out of the restroom) Hi, Squidward!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Annoyed) Hello...you...<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: I just finished cleaning the restroom!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Sarcastically) Ooh! That's great!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: I mopped the floors! I shined the mirrors! I scrubbed the sinks!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Sarcastically) Wonderful.<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Oh, yeah! (Takes out Squidward's clarinet which is now soaking wet) But we're gonna need a new toilet plunger. This one's broken.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Enraged) Patrick! (Takes back the clarinet and growls at Patrick which Mr. Krabs appears to see what is happening)<br><br />
<br />
Mr. Krabs: Nice work, Patrick! Break time's over, Mr. Squidward.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Walks over to a customer) Welcome to the House of Misery. May I take your order?<br><br />
<br />
Dave: Yes, I would like 2 Double Fried Kelp Fritters, 3 Krusty Krab Cream Filled Corals, and 4 Triple Fatty Krabby Patties. (Curiously) Is that too much?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: That depends.<br><br />
<br />
Dave: (Confused) On what?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: How long you want to live? (Laughs and walks right into Patrick. Patrick laughs as Squidward's nose is stuck in his mouth. Squidward tries hard to get his nose free and he does, but goes flying in the process)<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Hah hah! Squidward's funny! (Looks down and picks up something) Hey, a button!<br><br />
<br />
Gus: (Comes in holding a pie) Oh, Grammy, I brought your favorite; seaberry pie. (Notices Squidward flying toward him screaming) Yikes! (Runs away)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Crashes into the seaberry pie and then onto the window, then tastes the pie) Seaberries? I'm allergic to...(His body and face puff up) ...seaberries... (Frustrated) That's it! I know what I must do! (Starts walking toward SpongeBob) SpongeBob! (SpongeBob ducks behind the window)<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: You're the prettiest button I've ev...(Spots Squidward) Huh? Monster!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: SpongeBob!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: It's after SpongeBob! (Pauses and looks at the button) You're right, button! No monster's gonna eat our friend! (Jumps up high and yells; heads toward Squidward)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No, no, no, no, wait!<br><br />
<br />
(Patrick lands on Squidward and starts attacking him. They both roll into the back where SpongeBob is, then they start fighting)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Oh, no! My two best friends are fighting! (Takes out his restraining order) But this restraining order says I can't get close enough to break it off! (Watches as Squidward squirts mustard at Patrick's face and Patrick then hits him with a spatula. They both continue to roll around and fight) I'm sorry, restraining order! But my friends need me! (Screams and dives toward Squidward and Patrick and breaks up the fighting) Stop!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: (Notices the restraining order in SpongeBob's pocket and takes it) Give me that restraining order!<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Screams)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Alright, let's look at this.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Squidward, please don't send me to jail!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: (Confused) Squidward? (Looks at his button) Did you know the monster was Squidward? Well when were you going to tell me?<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Starts crying) I violated the restraining order! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Quit bellyaching and hand me a pen.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: (Cries) Here you go. (Hands him a pen then continues crying)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: Stop the waterworks! You're not going to jail.<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: I'm not? (Stops crying)<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No! I'm releasing you from this order. (Crosses out SpongeBob's name on the restraining order)<br><br />
<br />
SpongeBob: Really, Squidward?<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: ...and adding someone who's much more deserving!<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Sorry, button.<br><br />
<br />
Squidward: No, Patrick! YOU! (Shows the restraining order with "Patrick Star" now written on it)<br><br />
<br />
Patrick: Oh!!! AH HAH HAH HAH HAH!!!!<br><br />
<br />
(The episode ends with Patrick still laughing hysterically)<br />
<br />
{{Transcripts/Season 8}}<br />
<br />
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 8]]<br />
[[Category:Transcript]]</div>71.244.109.219http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_20,000_Patties_Under_the_SeaEpisode Transcript: 20,000 Patties Under the Sea2018-10-12T19:54:10Z<p>71.244.109.219: /* Dialogue */</p>
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<div>{| border="1"<br />
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!Back Episode Transcript<br />
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<br />
Episode Article: [[20,000 Patties Under the Sea (Episode)|20,000 Patties Under the Sea]]<br />
<br />
==Characters==<br />
*[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br />
*[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br />
*[[Sheldon J. Plankton|Plankton]]<br />
*[[Sea Monster]]<br />
*[[Eugene H. Krabs|Mr. Krabs]]<br />
*[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]] <br />
*Plankton's customers<br />
*Mr. Krabs, SpongeBob and Patrick's customers<br />
*[[Jack M. Crazyfish]]<br />
<br />
==Dialogue==<br />
(in Jellyfish Fields)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Breaker, breaker outer perimeter, looks clear. Over.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Robert, Robert...uhh...Ronald, Ronald. Ryan.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Are you sure you're not trying to say Roger?<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Oh, wait I got it. Ringo...<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Patrick, we have visual contact. Now taking evasive action. Subject still in close proximity. Over.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Hello?<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Please reply.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': I wonder if I can order pizza with these things.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Please, contact imminent Patrick. (nervously) Respond now. Please. Please!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': (unable to hear SpongeBob fully) SpongeBob, you're going to need to speak up. My eardrums aren't what they used to be.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': (trying to stifle the panic) But I can't speak up, Patrick. There's a jellyfish over here and I'm worried it might sting me if I make any loud... <br />
<br />
(SpongeBob bumps Patrick, who screams)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': (dismayed) ...noises. <br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Oops. (they run away. The jellyfish shrugs it off.)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Is he still after us, Patrick?<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': I don't know, buddy.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Should we turn around and check?<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Ok. (they trip over something)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Oh, I think I landed on my pain center.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': I think I landed on a rock.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Patrick, look! There's a weird thing sticking out of the ground right there.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': That's just Squidward sunbathing again. (Squidward lowers down his sunglasses)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': No, not that, Patrick. This!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': What is it?<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': I don't know. I think there's something buried underneath it. And I'm gonna go get some shovels so we can dig it up.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': We?<br />
<br />
(cut to large piles of dirt)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Phew! Nothing like a little manual labor to put some hair on your chest, eh, Patrick?<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': I'll say. (his entire chest is covered with hair)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Plus, look at what we unearthed! A UFO! (look inside) Go on, you first. (Patrick climbs down a ladder) Kinda dark, huh?<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Yeah, dark.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Well, there has to be a light switch around here somewhere. Found it. Excuse me, sir. (pulls off a skeleton and proceeds to start the submarine) Hey, Patrick, look! We're moving! And here's the steering wheel!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Hold it, SpongeBob. You better let me drive.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Gimme that wheel!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': No! Let go! I wanna drive! (the submarine goes crazy)<br />
<br />
(scene cuts to the Krusty Krab)<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs''': I don't understand, Squidward. Where are all the customers? I know the Krusty Krab isn't Bikini Bottom's most prostegious eatery, but at least it's better than that salty old Chum Bucket across the street. And that's our only competition.<br />
<br />
'''Squidward''': Am I getting paid extra for this conversation?<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs''': Oh, come on, Squidward. Can't you just pretend to listen just for once in your life? Do it for old Mr. Krabs.<br />
<br />
'''Squidward''': Well, since you can't bring any customers into the Krusty Krab, have you ever thought about bringing the Krusty Krab to the customers?<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs''': Quiet, Squidward, I'm brainstorming! Ooh, ooh! What if instead of bringing customers to the Krusty Krab, we could bring the Krusty Krab to the customers?<br />
<br />
'''Squidward''': La la la la la la la la la la la la.<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs''': Yes, of course! But how? (the submarine crashes into the Krusty Krab)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Can we park here? Hey, Mr. Krabs! Look what Patrick and I found! We're gonna use it to go on a long journey.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Or even around the block!<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs''': That's it! We'll take the Krusty Krab on the road. (cut to outside) So long, lad. Make me lots of money!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Bye, Squidward. Bye, Mr. Krabs. (dreamily) Bye, Squidward. <br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': You said "Bye, Squidward" twice.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': I like Squidward. <br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': (looking through a telescope) A traveling restaurant, eh? It's not fair! I had that idea years ago! No matter. If Mr. Krabs wants to play dirty, then Plankton's ready for his turn to take........ his turn. (laughs and turns the fist from the Chum Bucket building into a flying vehicle)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Hello!<br />
<br />
'''Man''': Hello.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Could I interest you in a Krabby Patty?<br />
<br />
'''Man''': No thanks.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Now what?<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': I don't know, Patrick. Mr. Krabs said if we didn't find customers, not to come back. (to Con Man) Uh, are you sure you don't want to be out first customer, sir?<br />
<br />
'''Man''': Yeah, I'm pretty sure. (walks away)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Wait! We'll pay you!<br />
<br />
'''Man''': Hey, thanks again, you guys. Good luck with the restaurant!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Thank you, very much sir, come again soon!<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': Those nincompoops are better salesmen than I suspected. (an alarm sets off)<br />
<br />
'''Voice''': Customer approaching.<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': Hello, little boy. Would you like a chum burger?<br />
<br />
'''Boy''': Uh, does it come in raspberry?<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': Um, no.<br />
<br />
'''Boy''': Blueberry?<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': (Angrily) No.<br />
<br />
'''Boy''': Uh...raspberry?<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': Ah, come on, kid. You asked me that already!!!! Now quit wasting my time!!! <br />
<br />
'''Lady Fish''': Hey, you can't talk to my son that way! Who do you think you are!!? <br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': I'm Plankton, you old hag. And your son smells like boogers!!! <br />
<br />
'''Man Fish''': Hey, you can't talk about my wife that way!!! What do you think this is!?!?!<br />
<br />
Plankton: It's time for you to lose some weight fatty!! That's what this is.<br />
<br />
'''Grandma''': Hey, you can't talk about my grandson like that! Somebody oughta put you in a mental hospital.<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': Somebody should put you in a box floating down the river, Grandma!!<br />
<br />
'''Grandma''': You're probably right.<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': You people are crazy. I'm getting out of here. (people start throwing rocks) What the? No! Controls malfunctioning!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Hey, Patrick.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Yeah?<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Weren't you supposed to be on kitchen duty? (cut to the kitchen, where the patties are burnt) Oh, no. You burnt all the patties. It's hard as a rock. How are we going to find someone who would buy these?<br />
<br />
'''Man Fish''': Hey, the rocks are all gone.<br />
<br />
'''Crowd''': Aww! (Plankton smiles)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Folks, have I got a deal for you. (the crowd sees the hard patties. they buy them and proceed to hit Plankton with them)<br />
<br />
'''Jack''': Alright, let's get him!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Mr. Krabs is going to be so proud of us when he finds out how good we're doing. Did you see any new customers, Patrick?<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': No, but I see a sign. It says. "Warning: Ab... eyes?"<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Let me see. (looks through periscope) No, Patrick, that says "Abyss."<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': OK. What's an abyss, SpongeBob?<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': An abyss is a bottomless...(the submarine falls down the abyss)...chasm! (an alarm goes off) Pat, we're falling!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': And now we're being bathed in an eerie red light!<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': (sees it falling) Yes! Yes!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': And now a deafening warning siren! (SpongeBob imitates the sound. the submarine hits a sludgy item, which turns out to be the head of the Sea Monster)<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': (shouts)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Look, Patrick! We've floated back up, out of the deep, dark, depressing, horrible abyss! (looks at the Sea Monster)<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': Hey! Who are you calling dark and depressing?<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': We didn't mean it that way, Mr. Sea Monster, sir! What we really want to know is... are you hungry?<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': Hungry? I've been asleep for 79 years. Which means my last meal was 79 years ago. Yes, I'm hungry.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Then try one of our Krabby Patties.<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': Mmm! That's the best thing I've tasted since that sewer spill...back in '76. I'll take 640 of them.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''' and '''Patrick''': Woo hoo!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Order...uh...up. (the Sea Monster gives them large wads of cash)<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': Now that those two are out of the picture, all of the customers will come running to me. (looks at the Sea Monster paying them) This calls for drastic, uh.. rish... measures! Okay, you bums, time for the second course; Chum Charges!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': SpongeBob! Our hull's been breached. Do you know what that means?<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': No!<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': Neither do I!<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': Yes! I sunk the Krusty Krab! I sunk the Krusty Krab! I sunk the...(the vehicle crashes into a cavern wall) Ah, who needs that Rust Bucket anyhow. (Takes out a parachute)<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': Come on in there! I want more sandwiches! <br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': (a piece of chum enters) SpongeBob, look!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': What is it?<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': It's a liquid.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': No, it's a solid! It's a solid!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''' and '''Patrick''': It's a "lol-squid."<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': All right, what's going on in there? Hey, that looks like a sandwich to me!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': But not just a sandwich. It's a...Chumwich.<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': (eats it) Mmm! Now that's a sandwich!<br />
<br />
(cut to a sequence of SpongeBob making Chumwiches, Patrick collecting the Chum, and the Sea Monster paying them for the Chumwiches)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': Anything else before we shove off?<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': I want dessert!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': We don't have desserts.<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': (lands from his parachute) Don't give another penny to those fast-food phonies. That's right, they stole my idea. My, my, my...(falls down and rolls into some mud)<br />
<br />
'''Sea Monster''': Hey, a chocolate eclair! Now that looks like dessert to me!<br />
<br />
'''Plankton''': No! No, no, no, no! You've got it all wrong, see... Hey! (the Sea Monster chases Plankton)<br />
<br />
(cut to the Krusty Krab)<br />
<br />
'''Janitor''': (repairing the windows SpongeBob and Patrick broke previously) There you are, Mr. Krabs, just like new again.<br />
<br />
'''Squidward''': Now all we have to do is keep SpongeBob away from the...(the submarine crashes into the windows. Janitor looks disappointedly at the window)<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': We're back, Mr. Krabs!<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs''': Tell me all about it. Please, tell me, tell me, tell me, tell me!<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': You wouldn't believe it, we had so many new customers!<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs''': I don't really care about that. Tell me about the money.<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': There we were at the bottom of a deep, dark, abyss. And we had to let go of something heavy.<br />
<br />
'''Patrick''': And paper.<br />
<br />
'''Mr. Krabs''': You let go of all the money I earned as ballast?<br />
<br />
'''SpongeBob''': (he and Patrick nod their heads) But on the bright side, we did manage to bring back 37,000 pounds of these decorative deep sea rocks!<br />
<br />
{{Transcripts/Season 5}}<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
[[Category:Transcript]]<br />
[[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 5]]</div>71.244.109.219