http://en.spongepedia.org/api.php?action=feedcontributions&feedformat=atom&user=71.234.165.197 2026-06-27T20:10:06Z User contributions MediaWiki 1.19.0 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Jingle_Bells 2011-01-09T19:47:45Z

<p>71.234.165.197: </p> <hr /> <div>'''Jingle Bells''' is a song sung by [[SpongeBob]], with a reprise with [[Mermaid Man]] and [[Barnacle Boy]] in the episode: [[Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy II]].<br /> <br /> ==Song text==<br /> <br /> 1st version: SpongeBob<br /> <br /> Jingle bells,<br /> [[Mermaid Man]] smells,<br /> [[Barnacle Boy]] laid an egg!<br /> <br /> The Invisible Boatmobile lost a wheel...<br /> <br /> Reprise: SpongeBob, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy<br /> <br /> The Invisible Boatmobile lost a wheel and<br /> Barnacle Boy laid an egg!<br /> Hey hey!<br /> <br /> Ohhh! Jingle bells,<br /> [[Mermaid Man]] smells,<br /> [[Barnacle Boy]] laid an egg!<br /> The [[Dirty Bubble]] popped and [[Mermaid Man]] and [[Barnacle Boy]] and [[SpongeBob SquarePants|Spongebob]] got away! Yay!<br /> <br /> <br /> {{Slogan}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Song text]]</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Jingle_Bells 2011-01-09T19:47:12Z

<p>71.234.165.197: </p> <hr /> <div>'''Jingle Bells''' is a song sung by [[SpongeBob]], with a reprise with [[Mermaid Man]] and [[Barnacle Boy]] in the episode: [[Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy II]].<br /> <br /> ==Song text==<br /> <br /> 1st version: SpongeBob<br /> <br /> Jingle bells,<br /> [[Mermaid Man]] smells,<br /> [[Barnacle Boy]] laid an egg!<br /> <br /> The Invisible Boatmobile lost a wheel...<br /> <br /> Reprise: SpongeBob, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy<br /> <br /> The Invisible Boatmobile lost a wheel and<br /> Barnacle Boy laid an egg!<br /> Hey hey!<br /> <br /> Ohhh! Jingle bells,<br /> [[Mermaid Man]] smells,<br /> [[Barnacle Boy]] laid an egg!<br /> The [[Dirty Bubble]] popped and [[Mermaid Man]] and [[Barnacle Boy]] and [[SpongeBob Squarepants|Spongebob]] got away! Yay!<br /> <br /> <br /> {{Slogan}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Song text]]</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Jingle_Bells 2011-01-09T19:44:59Z

<p>71.234.165.197: </p> <hr /> <div>'''Jingle Bells''' is a song sung by [[SpongeBob]], with a reprise with [[Mermaid Man]] and [[Barnacle Boy]] in the episode: [[Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy II]].<br /> <br /> ==Song text==<br /> <br /> 1st version: SpongeBob<br /> <br /> Jingle bells,<br /> [[Mermaid Man]] smells,<br /> [[Barnacle Boy]] laid an egg!<br /> <br /> The Invisible Boatmobile lost a wheel...<br /> <br /> Reprise: SpongeBob, Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy<br /> <br /> The Invisible Boatmobile lost a wheel and<br /> Barnacle Boy laid an egg!<br /> Hey hey!<br /> <br /> Ohhh! Jingle bells,<br /> [[Mermaid Man]] smells,<br /> [[Barnacle Boy]] laid an egg!<br /> The [[Dirty Bubble]] popped and [[Mermaid Man]] and [[Barnacle Boy]] and [[Spongebob Squarepants|spongebob]] got away! Yay!<br /> <br /> <br /> {{Slogan}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Song text]]</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_No_Free_Rides 2010-12-30T01:58:46Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Dialogue */</p> <hr /> <div>[[de: Episodenmitschrift: Der Schrecken der Straße]]<br /> {| border=&quot;1&quot;<br /> |-bgcolor=&quot;#CCCCCC&quot;<br /> !Back Episode Transcript<br /> !Next Episode Transcript<br /> |-<br /> |align=&quot;center&quot; rowspan=&quot;3&quot;|[[Episode Transcript: Dumped|Dumped]]<br /> |[[Episode Transcript: I'm Your Biggest Fanatic|I’m Your Biggest Fanatic]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> Episode Article: [[No Free Rides (Episode)|No Free Rides]]<br /> <br /> ==Characters==<br /> *[[SpongeBob]]<br /> *[[Mrs. Puff]]<br /> *[[Mother SquarePants]]<br /> *[[Father SquarePants]]<br /> *[[Johnny]]<br /> *[[Boaty]]<br /> <br /> ==Dialogue==<br /> <br /> (It's another day at Mrs. Puff's Boating School as SpongeBob skids along his way to failing his driving test again)<br /> <br /> '''Narrator:''' Here we are again at the Bikini Bottom Boating School. Today is once again the day of SpongeBob's boating school exam. But more importantly, this is the last test for the year, (cut to a shot of SpongeBob and Mrs. Puff's car coming straight to the camera) and if SpongeBob does not pass this one, it means another whole year of boating school! (we see a static scene as SpongeBob crashes into the camera and glass breaks. Back on regular view, we see the cameraman has fell over and is groaning)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What happened?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Oh, nothing SpongeBob, you just struck [[Fred|another pedestrian]]. (writes on clipboard) Minus 20 more points…<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' How many does that leave me with?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Negative 224.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' How many more minutes left in the test?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' The test is over.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' That’s enough time, I can make up those points! (Sponge is about to pull into reverse)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' No, SpongeBob, you didn't hear me! (the boat rams into reverse and Mrs. Puff screams. Mrs. Puff pleads Sponge to stop as Sponge knocks over a whole row of cones, knocks through a brick wall and crashes in front of the school's main building. The dust clears)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' OK, Mrs. Puff, what's my final score?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' 6.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Whoo! And how many do I need to pass?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' 6...<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (raising arms slowly) Oooooooooooo…<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' ...hundred. (SpongeBob stops)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Six hundred. You need six hundred to pass. You got six.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Don't worry, I'll be all right Mrs. Puff. Besides, this means that I get to be in your class for a whole 'nother year! (he slams his fist down, which causes a piece of the motor to fly upward) Well, see you next Tuesday! (Sponge walks off and the piece crashes on Mrs. Puff. She inflates like she always does when Sponge crashes. Sponge runs out to his unicycle-like bike) Yeah! (singing) I'm gonna get my driver's license and it's only gonna take one more year, one more year, one more superduper year... (goes around in circles on his bike) One more super-spectacular, extra-magical, extra-fantastical year! (Mrs. Puff looks on, still inflated)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' (thinking) Oh, Neptune. Another year with him! Barnacles! Dirty barnacles! I've got to do something to save myself. Oh, there's only one way out: a teacher's ace in the hole! (starts to talk, when she does, she deflates to her normal size) Extra crediiiiit!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What was that, SpongeBob? (Mrs. Puff runs over and shakes him in joy)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Extra credit, SpongeBob! The extra credit! (laughing wildly) I still have a chance! I mean, you still have a chance.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What's extra credit?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's when you get credit for the things you weren't able to do before.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (singing) Oh. (cut to SpongeBob at his desk)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Now, are we ready for that extra credit?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Extra credit!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's the spirit! So all you have to do to earn your extra credit and pass my class and never have to go anywhere near this school again, is to write a 10-word sentence on what you've learned in boating school.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' But I've learned so many things.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Just pick one, I don't care which. Here, I'll help you get started. (SpongeBob writes what she says) &quot;What I learned in boating school is...&quot; There! That's already seven words! Only three more!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (writing) L… e… a… r… (pencil snaps) Aw, barnacles.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What's wrong?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Got to sharpen my pencil. (SpongeBob whistles as he walks to the sharpener. He then sharpens it multiple times to get just the right sharpness. Mrs. Puff begins to sweat. <br /> SpongeBob is finally satisfied and walks back to his desk) N... e... (pencil breaks again, he walks to the sharpener again, Mrs. Puff stops him, grabs the pencil and holds out a pen)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Give me that! Here's a pen.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' A pen! One of the most permanent of all writing utensils. (walks back to desk singing) Gonna write an essay, that's what I say. (SpongeBob finishes) There.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Fantastic, let me see it.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No, wait! I changed my mind! (scribbles some stuff out)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I'm sure whatever you've written is fine, just let me see. (SpongeBob jumps on top of his paper)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Don't look! It's not ready. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's so simple, only 10 words! &quot;What I learned in boating school is blankity, blankity, (her eyes grow bulging veins) BLANK!&quot;<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I can do this! I can do this!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' &quot;What I learned in boating school is...!&quot; &quot;What I learned in boating school is...!&quot;<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I can do this! I can do this! (starts to pant) Is it hot in here, Mrs. Puff? Why is it so hot in here? Aah! My hand is cramping, Mrs. Puff! Make it stop! (Mrs. Puff jumps on SpongeBob and forces the pen to push on the paper)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' You only need three... more... words! (the desk finally collapses and breaks. Mrs. Puff reaches for the essay) Okay, let me see what you’ve written. (SpongeBob grabs on)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' It's not ready yet.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's okay, SpongeBob. Show the teacher what you've written.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Give it to me! (the two pull on it)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Let me see it! (the page rips in half. Mrs. Puff grabs SpongeBob’s piece and attempts to read it) &quot;What I learned in boating school is...&quot; Uh... (on the page, it says 'What I learned in boating school is how to drive.' 'School,' 'how' and 'drive are crossed out and below are pictures of a boat, Sponge and a jellyfish) Well, the rest doesn't matter! (throws the two pieces on the floor) You pass! (laughs) You pass!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Mrs. Puff, I don't feel like I really did anything.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's how extra credit is supposed to feel. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Really?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Besides, here's your license. (gives it to SpongeBob)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' My license! (licks it) It tastes just like I dreamed it would. Mrs. Puff, I-<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:'''(dragging him out the door) Thank you, SpongeBob. Congratulations, and have a nice life! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Look out Bikini Bottom! There's a new driver in town and his name is....SpongeBob SquarePants. (echoes) SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. (fades to a vision of Mrs. Puff's fears) La La La La! (he hits many pedestrians) La La La La! <br /> <br /> (A small birthday party is going on) <br /> <br /> '''Partygoers:''' It's Your Birthday! Happy Birthday! <br /> <br /> '''Realistic Fish Head:''' So much destruction...this reporter asks, &quot;Why?&quot; Local consensus places the blame on this negligent, selfish driving instructor who – (SpongeBob runs him over) OOF! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' La la la la! <br /> <br /> '''Realisitic Fish Head:''' Let's – not – use that take. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's preposterous. He did the extra credit. There's no need to worry. He doesn't even have a boat to drive. (Later that night while walking home) Now to go home and have the rest of that pasta. <br /> <br /> (she opens the door and turns on the light to see the SquarePants Family standing in the center of her living room with a huge round cake in the middle saying, &quot;Thank You, Mrs. Puff! &quot;) <br /> <br /> '''The SquarePants:''' Surprise!! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' To the greatest teacher ever! <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' Thank you, Mrs Puff. I know I speak for everyone when I say that we consider you a member of the SquarePants family. (kisses her hand for a long while) <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' I think you made your point, Dear. <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' Ahem. (blushes, and walks back to the family) Mrs. Puff, we were starting to think SpongeBob was never going to get his licence. But you never gave up on him, you never quit, you never took the easy way out! <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Well, I...Okay. <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' We wanted to make sure Mrs. Puff, the greatest driving teacher in the world, was here to see this... <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' See what? <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' (takes the cover off) Ta-Daa!! (reading back licence plate) &quot;IM-RDY&quot; <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff and SpkngeBob:''' A BRAND NEW BOATMOBILE!!! <br /> <br /> '''Spongebob:''' For me...? (faints and hits the cake, cutting out a perfect square)<br /> <br /> (The family is in the car ready to drive away with SpongeBob still passed out in the backseat) <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' Don't worry, Mrs. Puff...He'll be driving by tomorrow! Toodle-Loo!! <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What have I done?! Everyone will know I let him slide through school! I'll have to move to new city, start a new boating school with a new name! No. not again! I've got to end this before it begins. <br /> <br /> (In SpongeBob's bedroom, he's laying in bed with his parents overlooking him.)<br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' You took quite a buster there, Son. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What I learned in Boating School today is!!! <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' We're gonna hafta hold off on the driving there for a while, son. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' That's right Honey. Now, just stay in bed, and no going near the boat! (turns off the lights and leaves the bedroom and the door closes)<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob peeks out to see if it's all clear, then slides through the window and floats to his new boat)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Hi, Boaty. (he runs his hand on the side of the boat and gasps) Boaty, you're cold! (he stands up and lays his socks on the side of the door) Take my socks. (he jumps on the side and hugs it) Oh Boaty, I'm always going to take care of you. You're the best boat in the deep blue sea! (he kisses the throttle lever, sighs, then falls asleep. On the horizon, a shifty dark figure runs by. It is Mrs. Puff, wearing a black ski mask. She peeks over and jumps into the boat, checking to see if the coast is clear)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I hope I still remember how to do this. (she takes out a purple balloon and blows it up. She then forms it into a balloon animal and snickers to herself) Yeah...(she starts the boat and drives off. What she doesn't know is that she's sitting on an asleep SpongeBob). <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (wakes up and sees the sky moving) Hey, I'm driving! (the two notice each other and scream. Mrs. Puff skids off the road for a bit, then returns to normal. Sponge jumps up) Who are you and what are you doing with my boat? And why are you wearing that ski mask, because you're not skiing! (gasps) Oh my gosh, I know who you are!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' (nervous) No you don't! You don't know who [[Mrs. Puff|I]] am!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Yes I do! I know that you're a boat-jacker! I never thought I'd have to use this pepper spray. (takes it out. He sprays, but it's pointed the wrong way and it gets in his eyes and he screams) Somebody help me! Somebody help me! (Mrs. Puff kicks Sponge out of the boat)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Sorry, SpongeBob, but it was for your own good. <br /> <br /> (SpongeBob supposedly running next to the boat, but he's actually riding his bike. Mrs. Puff speeds up faster and loses him) <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Give me back my boat! (Sponge finally catches up to Mrs. Puff and slaps his hand on the windshield. He grabs with both hands and jumps up. Mrs. Puff skids and swerves to get him off but he's not budging) You'd better stop this boat! (Mrs. Puff slams the brake and Sponge falls to the ground. He's still hanging on and running) I'm… not… letting… go! Nothing will stop me! Not even… (gasps. He sees a sign reading…) Giant clams?! (so, Sponge is dragged through a field of giant clams. He comes out with a bunch of pieces missing from him) I'm… not… letting… go… not even for… (gasps, when he sees another sign for…) Cheese graters?! (so he skids through the cheese graters. Now he's just three yellow sponge strands with arms) If you think I'll let go just for a little… (he then approaches the most dreaded sign of them all…) Educational television?! Oh no! (cut back to Mrs. Puff as she hears Sponge's screams)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Looks like that got rid of him. Now for some tunes. (she turns on the radio, which bears a striking resemblance to Sponge. It is SpongeBob, in the shape of a radio: his eyes are knobs, mouth the speaker, and so on)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' And now back to KRUD with all of your personal &quot;you won't get away with stealing my car!&quot; hits. <br /> <br /> (Mrs. Puff screams as Sponge squeezes out of the box and jumps on Mrs. Puff. They get into a giant brawl and the car goes out of control. Two cops look on)<br /> <br /> '''Cop 1:''' Hey, look. (the car then flies off a cliff and straight for the squad car. The two policemen scream. While plummeting, Sponge and Mrs. Puff are still brawling)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I'd never let you have this boat! Not even if you were… (he rips off the ski mask, revealing who the culprit is) … Mrs. Puff? (SpongeBob babbles his lips in disbelief as the car crashes into the police car. Seconds later, the siren goes off. Later, SpongeBob is calling Mrs. Puff on the phone. Every time a person talks, it cuts to them) So, how's it going, Mrs. Puff?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Uh, SpongeBob? I'd like to… apologize. I never should have passed you. You really weren't ready. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' So, I guess I have to got to give my license back, huh?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I hear Mrs. Flounder is starting a new class Monday morning.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' You kidding? You're the only teacher for this student. (cut to see that Mrs. Puff is talking to Sponge from jail, through that visiting window) And besides, the warden said she'll let you go early, if you do her a favor?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What's that? (pan out from the jail exterior)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (from inside) Free driving lessons! (laughs) <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 2}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> <br /> {{Slogan}}</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_No_Free_Rides 2010-12-30T01:53:41Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Dialogue */</p> <hr /> <div>[[de: Episodenmitschrift: Der Schrecken der Straße]]<br /> {| border=&quot;1&quot;<br /> |-bgcolor=&quot;#CCCCCC&quot;<br /> !Back Episode Transcript<br /> !Next Episode Transcript<br /> |-<br /> |align=&quot;center&quot; rowspan=&quot;3&quot;|[[Episode Transcript: Dumped|Dumped]]<br /> |[[Episode Transcript: I'm Your Biggest Fanatic|I’m Your Biggest Fanatic]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> Episode Article: [[No Free Rides (Episode)|No Free Rides]]<br /> <br /> ==Characters==<br /> *[[SpongeBob]]<br /> *[[Mrs. Puff]]<br /> *[[Mother SquarePants]]<br /> *[[Father SquarePants]]<br /> *[[Johnny]]<br /> *[[Boaty]]<br /> <br /> ==Dialogue==<br /> <br /> (It's another day at Mrs. Puff's Boating School as SpongeBob skids along his way to failing his driving test again)<br /> <br /> '''Narrator:''' Here we are again at the Bikini Bottom Boating School. Today is once again the day of SpongeBob's boating school exam. But more importantly, this is the last test for the year, (cut to a shot of SpongeBob and Mrs. Puff's car coming straight to the camera) and if SpongeBob does not pass this one, it means another whole year of boating school! (we see a static scene as SpongeBob crashes into the camera and glass breaks. Back on regular view, we see the cameraman has fell over and is groaning)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What happened?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Oh, nothing SpongeBob, you just struck [[Fred|another pedestrian]]. (writes on clipboard) Minus 20 more points…<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' How many does that leave me with?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Negative 224.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' How many more minutes left in the test?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' The test is over.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' That’s enough time, I can make up those points! (Sponge is about to pull into reverse)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' No, SpongeBob, you didn't hear me! (the boat rams into reverse and Mrs. Puff screams. Mrs. Puff pleads Sponge to stop as Sponge knocks over a whole row of cones, knocks through a brick wall and crashes in front of the school's main building. The dust clears)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' OK, Mrs. Puff, what's my final score?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' 6.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Whoo! And how many do I need to pass?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' 6...<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (raising arms slowly) Oooooooooooo…<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' ...hundred. (SpongeBob stops)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Six hundred. You need six hundred to pass. You got six.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Don't worry, I'll be all right Mrs. Puff. Besides, this means that I get to be in your class for a whole 'nother year! (he slams his fist down, which causes a piece of the motor to fly upward) Well, see you next Tuesday! (Sponge walks off and the piece crashes on Mrs. Puff. She inflates like she always does when Sponge crashes. Sponge runs out to his unicycle-like bike) Yeah! (singing) I'm gonna get my driver's license and it's only gonna take one more year, one more year, one more superduper year... (goes around in circles on his bike) One more super-spectacular, extra-magical, extra-fantastical year! (Mrs. Puff looks on, still inflated)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' (thinking) Oh, Neptune. Another year with him! Barnacles! Dirty barnacles! I've got to do something to save myself. Oh, there's only one way out: a teacher's ace in the hole! (starts to talk, when she does, she deflates to her normal size) Extra crediiiiit!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What was that, SpongeBob? (Mrs. Puff runs over and shakes him in joy)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Extra credit, SpongeBob! The extra credit! (laughing wildly) I still have a chance! I mean, you still have a chance.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What's extra credit?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's when you get credit for the things you weren't able to do before.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (singing) Oh. (cut to SpongeBob at his desk)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Now, are we ready for that extra credit?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Extra credit!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's the spirit! So all you have to do to earn your extra credit and pass my class and never have to go anywhere near this school again, is to write a 10-word sentence on what you've learned in boating school.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' But I've learned so many things.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Just pick one, I don't care which. Here, I'll help you get started. (SpongeBob writes what she says) &quot;What I learned in boating school is...&quot; There! That's already seven words! Only three more!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (writing) L… e… a… r… (pencil snaps) Aw, barnacles.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What's wrong?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Got to sharpen my pencil. (SpongeBob whistles as he walks to the sharpener. He then sharpens it multiple times to get just the right sharpness. Mrs. Puff begins to sweat. <br /> SpongeBob is finally satisfied and walks back to his desk) N... e... (pencil breaks again, he walks to the sharpener again, Mrs. Puff stops him, grabs the pencil and holds out a pen)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Give me that! Here's a pen.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' A pen! One of the most permanent of all writing utensils. (walks back to desk singing) Gonna write an essay, that's what I say. (SpongeBob finishes) There.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Fantastic, let me see it.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No, wait! I changed my mind! (scribbles some stuff out)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I'm sure whatever you've written is fine, just let me see. (SpongeBob jumps on top of his paper)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Don't look! It's not ready. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's so simple, only 10 words! &quot;What I learned in boating school is blankity, blankity, (her eyes grow bulging veins) BLANK!&quot;<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I can do this! I can do this!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' &quot;What I learned in boating school is...!&quot; &quot;What I learned in boating school is...!&quot;<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I can do this! I can do this! (starts to pant) Is it hot in here, Mrs. Puff? Why is it so hot in here? Aah! My hand is cramping, Mrs. Puff! Make it stop! (Mrs. Puff jumps on SpongeBob and forces the pen to push on the paper)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' You only need three... more... words! (the desk finally collapses and breaks. Mrs. Puff reaches for the essay) Okay, let me see what you’ve written. (SpongeBob grabs on)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' It's not ready yet.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's okay, SpongeBob. Show the teacher what you've written.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Give it to me! (the two pull on it)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Let me see it! (the page rips in half. Mrs. Puff grabs SpongeBob’s piece and attempts to read it) &quot;What I learned in boating school is...&quot; Uh... (on the page, it says 'What I learned in boating school is how to drive.' 'School,' 'how' and 'drive are crossed out and below are pictures of a boat, Sponge and a jellyfish) Well, the rest doesn't matter! (throws the two pieces on the floor) You pass! (laughs) You pass!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Mrs. Puff, I don't feel like I really did anything.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's how extra credit is supposed to feel. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Really?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Besides, here's your license. (gives it to SpongeBob)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' My license! (licks it) It tastes just like I dreamed it would. Mrs. Puff, I-<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:'''(dragging him out the door) Thank you, SpongeBob. Congratulations, and have a nice life! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Look out Bikini Bottom! There's a new driver in town and his name is....SpongeBob SquarePants. (echoes) SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. (fades to a vision of Mrs. Puff's fears) La La La La! (he hits many pedestrians) La La La La! <br /> <br /> (A small birthday party is going on) <br /> <br /> '''Partygoers:''' It's Your Birthday! Happy Birthday! <br /> <br /> '''Realistic Fish Head:''' So much destruction...this reporter asks, &quot;Why?&quot; Local consensus places the blame on this negligent, selfish driving instructor who – (SpongeBob runs him over) OOF! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' La la la la! <br /> <br /> '''Realisitic Fish Head:''' Let's – not – use that take. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's preposterous. He did the extra credit. There's no need to worry. He doesn't even have a boat to drive. (Later that night while walking home) Now to go home and have the rest of that pasta. <br /> <br /> (she opens the door and turns on the light to see the SquarePants Family standing in the center of her living room with a huge round cake in the middle saying, &quot;Thank You, Mrs. Puff! &quot;) <br /> <br /> '''The SquarePants:''' Surprise!! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' To the greatest teacher ever! <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' Thank you, Mrs Puff. I know I speak for everyone when I say that we consider you a member of the SquarePants family. (kisses her hand for a long while) <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' I think you made your point, Dear. <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' Ahem. (blushes, and walks back to the family) Mrs. Puff, we were starting to think SpongeBob was never going to get his licence. But you never gave up on him, you never quit, you never took the easy way out! <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Well, I...Okay. <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' We wanted to make sure Mrs. Puff, the greatest driving teacher in the world, was here to see this... <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' See what? <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' (takes the cover off) Ta-Daa!! (reading back licence plate) &quot;IM-RDY&quot; <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff and SpkngeBob:''' A BRAND NEW BOATMOBILE!!! <br /> <br /> '''Spongebob:''' For me...? (faints and hits the cake, cutting out a perfect square)<br /> <br /> (The family is in the car ready to drive away with SpongeBob still passed out in the backseat) <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' Don't worry, Mrs. Puff...He'll be driving by tomorrow! Toodle-Loo!! <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What have I done?! Everyone will know I let him slide through school! I'll have to move to new city, start a new boating school with a new name! No. not again! I've got to end this before it begins. <br /> <br /> (In SpongeBob's bedroom, he's laying in bed with his parents overlooking him.)<br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' You took quite a buster there, Son. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What I learned in Boating School today is!!! <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' We're gonna hafta hold off on the driving there for a while, son. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' That's right Honey. Now, just stay in bed, and no going near the boat! (turns off the lights and leaves the bedroom and the door closes)<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob peeks out to see if it's all clear, then slides through the window and floats to his new boat)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Hi, Boaty. (he runs his hand on the side of the boat and gasps) Boaty, you're cold! (he stands up and lays his socks on the side of the door) Take my socks. (he jumps on the side and hugs it) Oh Boaty, I'm always going to take care of you. You're the best boat in the deep blue sea! (he kisses the throttle lever, sighs, then falls asleep. On the horizon, a shifty dark figure runs by. It is Mrs. Puff, wearing a black ski mask. She peeks over and jumps into the boat, checking to see if the coast is clear)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I hope I still remember how to do this. (she takes out a purple balloon and blows it up. She then forms it into a balloon animal and snickers to herself) Yeah… (she starts the boat and drives off. What she doesn't know is that she's sitting on an asleep SpongeBob. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' wakes up and sees the sky moving) SpongeBob: Hey, I'm driving! (the two notice each other and scream. Mrs. Puff skids off the road for a bit, then returns to normal. Sponge jumps up) Who are you and what are you doing with my boat? And why are you wearing that ski mask, when you're not skiing! (gasps) Oh my gosh, I know who you are! &lt;br&gt;<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' (nervous) No you don't! You don't know who [[Mrs. Puff|I]] am!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Yes I do! I know that you're a boat-jacker! I never thought I'd have to use this pepper spray. (takes it out. He sprays, but it's pointed the wrong way and it gets in his eyes and he screams) Somebody help me! Somebody help me! (Mrs. Puff kicks Sponge out of the boat)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Sorry, SpongeBob, but it was for your own good. <br /> <br /> (SpongeBob supposedly running next to the boat, but he's actually riding his bike. Mrs. Puff speeds up faster and loses him) <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Give me back my boat! (Sponge finally catches up to Mrs. Puff and slaps his hand on the windshield. He grabs with both hands and jumps up. Mrs. Puff skids and swerves to get him off but he's not budging) You'd better stop this boat! (Mrs. Puff slams the brake and Sponge falls to the ground. He's still hanging on and running) I'm… not… letting… go! Nothing will stop me! Not even… (gasps. He sees a sign reading…) Giant clams?! (so, Sponge is dragged through a field of giant clams. He comes out with a bunch of pieces missing from him) I'm… not… letting… go… not even for… (gasps, when he sees another sign for…) Cheese graters?! (so he skids through the cheese graters. Now he's just three yellow sponge strands with arms) If you think I'll let go just for a little… (he then approaches the most dreaded sign of them all…) Educational television?! Oh no! (cut back to Mrs. Puff as she hears Sponge's screams)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Looks like that got rid of him. Now for some tunes. (she turns on the radio, which bears a striking resemblance to Sponge. It is SpongeBob, in the shape of a radio: his eyes are knobs, mouth the speaker, and so on)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' And now back to KRUD with all of your personal &quot;you won't get away with stealing my car!&quot; hits. <br /> <br /> (Mrs. Puff screams as Sponge squeezes out of the box and jumps on Mrs. Puff. They get into a giant brawl and the car goes out of control. Two cops look on)<br /> <br /> '''Cop 1:''' Hey, look. (the car then flies off a cliff and straight for the squad car. The two policemen scream. While plummeting, Sponge and Mrs. Puff are still brawling)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I'd never let you have this boat! Not even if you were… (he rips off the ski mask, revealing who the culprit is) … Mrs. Puff? (SpongeBob babbles his lips in disbelief as the car crashes into the police car. Seconds later, the siren goes off. Later, SpongeBob is calling Mrs. Puff on the phone. Every time a person talks, it cuts to them) So, how's it going, Mrs. Puff?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Uh, SpongeBob? I'd like to… apologize. I never should have passed you. You really weren't ready. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' So, I guess I have to got to give my license back, huh?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I hear Mrs. Flounder is starting a new class Monday morning.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' You kidding? You're the only teacher for this student. (cut to see that Mrs. Puff is talking to Sponge from jail, through that visiting window) And besides, the warden said she'll let you go early, if you do her a favor?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What's that? (pan out from the jail exterior)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (from inside) Free driving lessons! (laughs) <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 2}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> <br /> {{Slogan}}</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_No_Free_Rides 2010-12-30T01:51:36Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Dialogue */</p> <hr /> <div>[[de: Episodenmitschrift: Der Schrecken der Straße]]<br /> {| border=&quot;1&quot;<br /> |-bgcolor=&quot;#CCCCCC&quot;<br /> !Back Episode Transcript<br /> !Next Episode Transcript<br /> |-<br /> |align=&quot;center&quot; rowspan=&quot;3&quot;|[[Episode Transcript: Dumped|Dumped]]<br /> |[[Episode Transcript: I'm Your Biggest Fanatic|I’m Your Biggest Fanatic]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> Episode Article: [[No Free Rides (Episode)|No Free Rides]]<br /> <br /> ==Characters==<br /> *[[SpongeBob]]<br /> *[[Mrs. Puff]]<br /> *[[Mother SquarePants]]<br /> *[[Father SquarePants]]<br /> *[[Johnny]]<br /> *[[Boaty]]<br /> <br /> ==Dialogue==<br /> <br /> (It's another day at Mrs. Puff's Boating School as SpongeBob skids along his way to failing his driving test again)<br /> <br /> '''Narrator:''' Here we are again at the Bikini Bottom Boating School. Today is once again the day of SpongeBob's boating school exam. But more importantly, this is the last test for the year, (cut to a shot of SpongeBob and Mrs. Puff's car coming straight to the camera) and if SpongeBob does not pass this one, it means another whole year of boating school! (we see a static scene as SpongeBob crashes into the camera and glass breaks. Back on regular view, we see the cameraman has fell over and is groaning)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What happened?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Oh, nothing SpongeBob, you just struck [[Fred|another pedestrian]]. (writes on clipboard) Minus 20 more points…<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' How many does that leave me with?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Negative 224.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' How many more minutes left in the test?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' The test is over.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' That’s enough time, I can make up those points! (Sponge is about to pull into reverse)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' No, SpongeBob, you didn't hear me! (the boat rams into reverse and Mrs. Puff screams. Mrs. Puff pleads Sponge to stop as Sponge knocks over a whole row of cones, knocks through a brick wall and crashes in front of the school's main building. The dust clears)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' OK, Mrs. Puff, what's my final score?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' 6.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Whoo! And how many do I need to pass?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' 6...<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (raising arms slowly) Oooooooooooo…<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' ...hundred. (SpongeBob stops)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Six hundred. You need six hundred to pass. You got six.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Don't worry, I'll be all right Mrs. Puff. Besides, this means that I get to be in your class for a whole 'nother year! (he slams his fist down, which causes a piece of the motor to fly upward) Well, see you next Tuesday! (Sponge walks off and the piece crashes on Mrs. Puff. She inflates like she always does when Sponge crashes. Sponge runs out to his unicycle-like bike) Yeah! (singing) I'm gonna get my driver's license and it's only gonna take one more year, one more year, one more superduper year... (goes around in circles on his bike) One more super-spectacular, extra-magical, extra-fantastical year! (Mrs. Puff looks on, still inflated)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' (thinking) Oh, Neptune. Another year with him! Barnacles! Dirty barnacles! I've got to do something to save myself. Oh, there's only one way out: a teacher's ace in the hole! (starts to talk, when she does, she deflates to her normal size) Extra crediiiiit!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What was that, SpongeBob? (Mrs. Puff runs over and shakes him in joy)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Extra credit, SpongeBob! The extra credit! (laughing wildly) I still have a chance! I mean, you still have a chance.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What's extra credit?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's when you get credit for the things you weren't able to do before.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (singing) Oh. (cut to SpongeBob at his desk)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Now, are we ready for that extra credit?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Extra credit!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's the spirit! So all you have to do to earn your extra credit and pass my class and never have to go anywhere near this school again, is to write a 10-word sentence on what you've learned in boating school.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' But I've learned so many things.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Just pick one, I don't care which. Here, I'll help you get started. (SpongeBob writes what she says) &quot;What I learned in boating school is...&quot; There! That's already seven words! Only three more!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (writing) L… e… a… r… (pencil snaps) Aw, barnacles.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What's wrong?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Got to sharpen my pencil. (SpongeBob whistles as he walks to the sharpener. He then sharpens it multiple times to get just the right sharpness. Mrs. Puff begins to sweat. <br /> SpongeBob is finally satisfied and walks back to his desk) N... e... (pencil breaks again, he walks to the sharpener again, Mrs. Puff stops him, grabs the pencil and holds out a pen)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Give me that! Here's a pen.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' A pen! One of the most permanent of all writing utensils. (walks back to desk singing) Gonna write an essay, that's what I say. (SpongeBob finishes) There.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Fantastic, let me see it.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No, wait! I changed my mind! (scribbles some stuff out)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I'm sure whatever you've written is fine, just let me see. (SpongeBob jumps on top of his paper)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Don't look! It's not ready. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's so simple, only 10 words! &quot;What I learned in boating school is blankity, blankity, (her eyes grow bulging veins) BLANK!&quot;<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I can do this! I can do this!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' &quot;What I learned in boating school is...!&quot; &quot;What I learned in boating school is...!&quot;<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I can do this! I can do this! (starts to pant) Is it hot in here, Mrs. Puff? Why is it so hot in here? Aah! My hand is cramping, Mrs. Puff! Make it stop! (Mrs. Puff jumps on SpongeBob and forces the pen to push on the paper)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' You only need three... more... words! (the desk finally collapses and breaks. Mrs. Puff reaches for the essay) Okay, let me see what you’ve written. (SpongeBob grabs on)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' It's not ready yet.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' It's okay, SpongeBob. Show the teacher what you've written.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Give it to me! (the two pull on it)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' No!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Let me see it! (the page rips in half. Mrs. Puff grabs SpongeBob’s piece and attempts to read it) &quot;What I learned in boating school is...&quot; Uh... (on the page, it says 'What I learned in boating school is how to drive.' 'School,' 'how' and 'drive are crossed out and below are pictures of a boat, Sponge and a jellyfish) Well, the rest doesn't matter! (throws the two pieces on the floor) You pass! (laughs) You pass!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Mrs. Puff, I don't feel like I really did anything.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's how extra credit is supposed to feel. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Really?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Besides, here's your license. (gives it to SpongeBob)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' My license! (licks it) It tastes just like I dreamed it would. Mrs. Puff, I-<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:'''(dragging him out the door) Thank you, SpongeBob. Congratulations, and have a nice life! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Look out Bikini Bottom! There's a new driver in town and his name is....SpongeBob SquarePants. (echoes) SpongeBob SquarePants. SpongeBob SquarePants. (fades to a vision of Mrs. Puff's fears) La La La La! (he hits many pedestrians) La La La La! <br /> <br /> (A small birthday party is going on) <br /> <br /> '''Partygoers:''' It's Your Birthday! Happy Birthday! <br /> <br /> '''Realistic Fish Head:''' So much destruction...this reporter asks, &quot;Why?&quot; Local consensus places the blame on this negligent, selfish driving instructor who- (SpongeBob runs him over)OOF! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' La la la la! <br /> <br /> '''Realisitic Fish Head:''' Let's – not – use that take. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' That's preposterous. He did the extra credit. There's no need to worry. He doesn't even have a boat to drive. (Later that night while walking home) Now to go home and have the rest of that pasta. <br /> <br /> (she opens the door and turns on the light to see the SquarePants Family standing in the center of her living room with a huge round cake in the middle saying, &quot;Thank You, Mrs. Puff! &quot;) <br /> <br /> '''The SquarePants:''' Surprise!! <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' To the greatest teacher ever! <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' Thank you, Mrs Puff. I know I speak for everyone when I say that we consider you a member of the SquarePants family. (kisses her hand for a long while) <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' I think you made your point, Dear. <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' Ahem. (blushes, and walks back to the family) Mrs. Puff, we were starting to think SpongeBob was never going to get his licence. But you never gave up on him, you never quit, you never took the easy way out! <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Well, I...Okay. <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' We wanted to make sure Mrs. Puff, the greatest driving teacher in the world, was here to see this... <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' See what? <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' (takes the cover off) Ta-Daa!! (reading back licence plate) &quot;IM-RDY&quot; <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff and SpkngeBob:''' A BRAND NEW BOATMOBILE!!! <br /> <br /> '''Spongebob:''' For me...? (faints and hits the cake, cutting out a perfect square)<br /> <br /> (The family is in the car ready to drive away with SpongeBob still passed out in the backseat) <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' Don't worry, Mrs. Puff...He'll be driving by tomorrow! Toodle-Loo!! <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What have I done?! Everyone will know I let him slide through school! I'll have to move to new city, start a new boating school with a new name! No. not again! I've got to end this before it begins. <br /> <br /> (In SpongeBob's bedroom, he's laying in bed with his parents overlooking him.)<br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' You took quite a buster there, Son. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' What I learned in Boating School today is!!! <br /> <br /> '''Mr. SquarePants:''' We're gonna hafta hold off on the driving there for a while, son. <br /> <br /> '''Mrs. SquarePants:''' That's right Honey. Now, just stay in bed, and no going near the boat! (turns off the lights and leaves the bedroom and the door closes)<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob peeks out to see if it's all clear, then slides through the window and floats to his new boat)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Hi, Boaty. (he runs his hand on the side of the boat and gasps) Boaty, you're cold! (he stands up and lays his socks on the side of the door) Take my socks. (he jumps on the side and hugs it) Oh Boaty, I'm always going to take care of you. You're the best boat in the deep blue sea! (he kisses the throttle lever, sighs, then falls asleep. On the horizon, a shifty dark figure runs by. It is Mrs. Puff, wearing a black ski mask. She peeks over and jumps into the boat, checking to see if the coast is clear)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I hope I still remember how to do this. (she takes out a purple balloon and blows it up. She then forms it into a balloon animal and snickers to herself) Yeah… (she starts the boat and drives off. What she doesn't know is that she's sitting on an asleep SpongeBob. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' wakes up and sees the sky moving) SpongeBob: Hey, I'm driving! (the two notice each other and scream. Mrs. Puff skids off the road for a bit, then returns to normal. Sponge jumps up) Who are you and what are you doing with my boat? And why are you wearing that ski mask, when you're not skiing! (gasps) Oh my gosh, I know who you are! &lt;br&gt;<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' (nervous) No you don't! You don't know who [[Mrs. Puff|I]] am!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Yes I do! I know that you're a boat-jacker! I never thought I'd have to use this pepper spray. (takes it out. He sprays, but it's pointed the wrong way and it gets in his eyes and he screams) Somebody help me! Somebody help me! (Mrs. Puff kicks Sponge out of the boat)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Sorry, SpongeBob, but it was for your own good. <br /> <br /> (SpongeBob supposedly running next to the boat, but he's actually riding his bike. Mrs. Puff speeds up faster and loses him) <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' Give me back my boat! (Sponge finally catches up to Mrs. Puff and slaps his hand on the windshield. He grabs with both hands and jumps up. Mrs. Puff skids and swerves to get him off but he's not budging) You'd better stop this boat! (Mrs. Puff slams the brake and Sponge falls to the ground. He's still hanging on and running) I'm… not… letting… go! Nothing will stop me! Not even… (gasps. He sees a sign reading…) Giant clams?! (so, Sponge is dragged through a field of giant clams. He comes out with a bunch of pieces missing from him) I'm… not… letting… go… not even for… (gasps, when he sees another sign for…) Cheese graters?! (so he skids through the cheese graters. Now he's just three yellow sponge strands with arms) If you think I'll let go just for a little… (he then approaches the most dreaded sign of them all…) Educational television?! Oh no! (cut back to Mrs. Puff as she hears Sponge's screams)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Looks like that got rid of him. Now for some tunes. (she turns on the radio, which bears a striking resemblance to Sponge. It is SpongeBob, in the shape of a radio: his eyes are knobs, mouth the speaker, and so on)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' And now back to KRUD with all of your personal &quot;you won't get away with stealing my car!&quot; hits. <br /> <br /> (Mrs. Puff screams as Sponge squeezes out of the box and jumps on Mrs. Puff. They get into a giant brawl and the car goes out of control. Two cops look on)<br /> <br /> '''Cop 1:''' Hey, look. (the car then flies off a cliff and straight for the squad car. The two policemen scream. While plummeting, Sponge and Mrs. Puff are still brawling)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' I'd never let you have this boat! Not even if you were… (he rips off the ski mask, revealing who the culprit is) … Mrs. Puff? (SpongeBob babbles his lips in disbelief as the car crashes into the police car. Seconds later, the siren goes off. Later, SpongeBob is calling Mrs. Puff on the phone. Every time a person talks, it cuts to them) So, how's it going, Mrs. Puff?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' Uh, SpongeBob? I'd like to… apologize. I never should have passed you. You really weren't ready. <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' So, I guess I have to got to give my license back, huh?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' I hear Mrs. Flounder is starting a new class Monday morning.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' You kidding? You're the only teacher for this student. (cut to see that Mrs. Puff is talking to Sponge from jail, through that visiting window) And besides, the warden said she'll let you go early, if you do her a favor?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff:''' What's that? (pan out from the jail exterior)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob:''' (from inside) Free driving lessons! (laughs) <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 2}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> <br /> {{Slogan}}</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Bikini_Bottom_News 2010-12-30T01:30:57Z

<p>71.234.165.197: </p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:Kabel Jau.JPG|thumb|right|200px|'''Perch''']]<br /> 22<br /> '''The Bikini Bottom News''' is a channel on TV, (in which [[Patrick]] thinks is boring in the episode: [[SpongeHenge]]). There are lots of different reporters. Everyone's favorite is [[Perch Perkins]], who starred in the news flash announcing the [[Krusty Krab 2]]. In the earlier episodes, [[Johnny]] that did the news flashes. In the episode: [[The Krusty Sponge]], two fish named Bob and Barbara hosts the news, and [[Gene Scallop]] reviewed the [[Krusty Krab]] in his segment, [[Transcript: Bottom Feeding|Bottom Feeding]]. The News featuring Perch Perkins is seen in many other episodes, such as: [[Once Bitten]], where Perch was talking about the [[Mad Snail Disease]], and then in the episode: [[The Pink Purloiner]], Perch was at [[Jellyfish Fields]] talking about the Jellyfish Migration.<br /> [[Image:Bobspon.jpg|thumb|left|100px|'''Bob''']]<br /> [[Image:Barbaraks.jpg|thumb|right|100px|'''Barbara''']]<br /> ==Reporters==<br /> *[[Johnny]]<br /> *[[Perch Perkins]]<br /> *[[Bob]]<br /> *[[Barbara]]<br /> *[[Gene Scallop]]<br /> *[[Ben Flenny]]<br /> ==Trivia==<br /> *There is also a news paper, named &quot;Bikini Bottom News&quot; and they may be associated.<br /> *[[Mother SquarePants]] and [[Father SquarePants]] seem to watch it. As seen in the episode: [[BlackJack]]<br /> <br /> ==Gallery==<br /> &lt;gallery&gt;<br /> Image:Barbarabob.jpg|[[Barbara]] and [[Bob]]<br /> Image:Kabel_Jau.JPG|[[Perch Perkins]]<br /> Image:RealisticFishHead.jpg|[[Johnny]]<br /> Image:Bottomfeeding.jpg|Bottom Feeding with [[Gene Scallop]]<br /> Image:Blender.jpg|[[Ben Flenny]]<br /> &lt;/gallery&gt;<br /> <br /> &lt;br&gt;<br /> {{Slogan}}<br /> {{TV Programs}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Shows and Plays]]</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Bikini_Bottom_News 2010-12-30T01:27:55Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Gallery */</p> <hr /> <div>[[Image:Kabel Jau.JPG|thumb|right|200px|'''Perch''']]<br /> 22<br /> '''The Bikini Bottom News''' is a channel on TV, (in which [[Patrick]] thinks is boring in the episode: [[SpongeHenge]]). There are lots of different reporters. Everyone's favorite is [[Perch Perkins]], who starred in the news flash announcing the [[Krusty Krab 2]]. In the earlier episodes, [[Johnny]] that did the news flashes. In the episode: [[The Krusty Sponge]], two fish named Bob and Barbara hosts the news, and [[Gene Scallop]] reviewed the [[Krusty Krab]] in his segment, [[Transcript: Bottom Feeding|Bottom Feeding]]. The News featuring Perch Perkins is seen in many other episodes, such as: [[Once Bitten]], where Perch was talking about the [[Mad Snail Disease]], and then in the episode: [[The Pink Purloiner]], Perch was at [[Jellyfish Fields]] talking about the Jellyfish Migration.<br /> [[Image:Bobspon.jpg|thumb|left|100px|'''Bob''']]<br /> [[Image:Barbaraks.jpg|thumb|right|100px|'''Barbara''']]<br /> ==Reporters==<br /> *[[Johnny]]<br /> *[[Perch Perkins]]<br /> *[[Bob]]<br /> *[[Barbara]]<br /> *[[Gene Scallop]]<br /> *[[Ben Flenny]]<br /> ==Trivia==<br /> *There is also a news paper, named &quot;Bikini Bottom News&quot; and they may be associated.<br /> *[[Mother SquarePants]] and [[Father SquarePants]] seem to watch it. As seen in the episode: [[BlackJack]]<br /> <br /> ==Gallery==<br /> &lt;gallery&gt;<br /> Image:Barbarabob.jpg|Barbara and Bob<br /> Image:Kabel_Jau.JPG|Perch Perkins<br /> Image:RealisticFishHead.jpg|Johnny<br /> Image:Bottomfeeding.jpg|Bottom Feeding with Gene Scallop<br /> Image:Blender.jpg|Ben Flenny<br /> &lt;/gallery&gt;<br /> <br /> &lt;br&gt;<br /> {{Slogan}}<br /> {{TV Programs}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Shows and Plays]]</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Procrastination 2010-12-30T01:08:08Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Dialogue */</p> <hr /> <div>{| border=&quot;1&quot;<br /> |-bgcolor=&quot;#CCCCCC&quot;<br /> !Back Episode Transcript<br /> !Next Episode Transcript<br /> |-<br /> |align=&quot;center&quot; rowspan=&quot;3&quot;|[[Episode Transcript: Krusty Love|Krusty Love]]<br /> |[[Episode Transcript: I'm with Stupid|I'm with Stupid]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> Episode Article: [[Procrastination (Episode)|Procrastination]]<br /> <br /> ==Characters==<br /> *[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br /> *[[Mrs. Puff]]<br /> *[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br /> *[[Gary the Snail|Gary]]<br /> *Class<br /> *Talking items (chair, pants, clock, fire and Pineapple house)<br /> *Mailman<br /> *Realistic Fish Head<br /> *[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]] (seen in a deleted scene)<br /> *[[Sandy Cheeks|Sandy]] (seen in a deleted scene)<br /> <br /> ==Dialogue==<br /> (the bell rings)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Ok, class, quiet, quiet. Now, get out your pencils and paper, and write down the assignment. <br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Did you hear that? We get an assignment!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Everyone must write an essay on What Not to Do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan again)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Did you hear that? What not to do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': In no less than 800 words. (squeals)<br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan again)<br /> <br /> '''Nat''': (acting like SpongeBob): Did you hear that? 800 words!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Yeah, I know!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Due tomorrow. And remember, class: work hard, and no goofing off.<br /> <br /> (back at SpongeBob's house)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Ok, Gary, no goofing off. I am about to write the greatest essay of all time. Like most great essays, it will be written on paper. Even more important than the paper is the pencil. A pencil is sharp or as dull as I like. Hmm.. funny thing, as my ideas grow, you shrink. Well, I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day to write an essay. (looks at window. It's colorful outside) Ok, here we go. What Not to Do at a Stoplight. Hey, this is easy! By SpongeBob SquarePants. Ah, this essay is pure gold. And now, pencil, get ready to do your stuff, because here we go! <br /> <br /> (The clock is shown. Several hours pass)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (has still only written 8 words) Gee, this is harder than I thought. (looks outside. There is a carnival. Squidward is suntanning. A kid is eating ice cream. Jellyfish are playing tennis. Gary is playing with a ball. Patrick is rubbing Sandy with sunscreen)<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Come on, SpongeBob!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': It should be against the law to have to write an essay on such a super sailorific, sunshiny day. (groans) But I must press onward. Because with this pencil, and the completion of this essay, I'll be one step closer to my driver's license! (a live-action drag race is shown. The car hits a wall, tumbles, and gets back up. Cut back to SpongeBob) Oh, yeah... This'll be no problemo. Why, I've got plenty of time. It's only six o'clock! Okay, okay, here we go. Here we go. (SpongeBob struggles to write) I know! I just need to get a little blood pumpin' in the old noodle. How about some callestetechs? (does callestetechs. While doing it, he recites &quot;Hup hoo&quot; several times) I can feel those juices pumpin' now.(moves his chair closer to the table. He does it a lot because of the fun noise it makes. He then laughs) Huh! What am I doing? I gotta write that paper. (pushes his chair in) Come on, pencil, make words.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Gary! Hey, hey, hey, Gary! How's my favorite mollusk? How about you and ol' SpongeBob fix you up something to eat?<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': What do you mean you're not hungry? <br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': I know I have an essay to write. Now, come on, Gary. (pours some food) I've got to make sure you get your nutrition, so I'm not leaving till you eat every single bite. (he takes up a ladder and fills it to ceiling-level. Gary quickly eats it) Gary, are you sure you don't want some crème brûlée? Or some choco-flavored algae bits? (sees a pile of food on the floor) Gee, Gary sure made a mess. I can't work on my essay, knowing there's a mess in the kitchen. (cleans it up) Hmm. I might as well clean the rest of the floor while I'm at it. I should get these hard-to-reach places too! And these dishes need to be cleaned! Can't have dirty garbage. (cut to SpongeBob, who has already finished) Well, I think it's clean enough now. (the kitchen is now chrome) Why, that didn't take too long. It's only...10:00! Oh. No more fooling around. I gotta get back to work. Okay, Mr. Essay, I say: prepare to be written! I'm doing it! I'm doing it! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! And some of these, and some of these! Almost there and... done. (sighs in relief) Now, let's see how it looks so far. The... Break time! Pacing always helps me think. Let's see, only 799 words to go. Think, SpongeBob, think. (looks at the telephone. Cut to Patrick in bed. His phone rings and he wakes up)<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Who's that? (picks up phone) Hello?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Hey, Patrick, what are you up to?<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Sleeping.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': That's really fascinating. Are you having a good sleep? Any dreams you'd like to discuss? I remember on the...<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': SpongeBob, you and I both know that you're just using me as a distraction so you don't have to write your essay.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gasps) That is not true! I called to have an engaging conversation with you!<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Well, I'm listening.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Uh...Marco!<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Polo. (hangs up)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (listening to a dial tone) Yeah, well, I gotta get going, Patrick. Got an important essay to write? (hangs up phone) Sheesh, what a chatterbox. Can't he see that I'm busy? I can't write with all these eraser shavings all over my paper! (throws them away) Now they're floating around my thinking space. (blows them away) So long, pesky particles! (chokes on one) I swallowed one! I'm choking! Water! Water! (goes to the kitchen and drinks water, then gasps in relief) That was a close one.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': What do you mean overly dramatic, Gary? All that choking sure made me hungry.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': I can't write on an empty stomach, Gary. I gotta have my brain food. (looking through his refrigerator) Now, let's see. White or rye bread...or pumpernickel? Gee, I guess it really depends on the meat inside. And the cheese. (doorbell rings) A visitor? For me? (opens the door) Hello!<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Package for Mr. SquarePants.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Great! Thanks! So, you like delivering mail?<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': It puts bread on the table.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Rye or pumpernickel? (laughs)<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Oh, brother.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': So, do you deliver your own mail? Or do you have your own mailperson? But then, who delivers his mail? Is there a never-ending chain of mailmen delivering mail to other mailmen? Well, I guess a P.O. box could, in theory, break the chain.<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Don't you have a paper to write? (walks away) <br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gulps) How did he know I'm supposed to be writing an essay? (blipping his eyes and slides back into the house)<br /> <br /> '''Realistic Fish Head''': In other news, local resident SpongeBob SquarePants only has a few hours left to complete his essay. And yet he continues to goof off. (his head leans through the TV screen into SpongeBob's face) When will he learn?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Hi-yah! (karate chops the TV causing a zap and the glass breaks. The room has a blackout and he lights a candle)<br /> <br /> '''Chair''': Hey! SpongeBob, over here! Come on. Take a seat. Put your feet up and relax. <br /> <br /> (Spongebob drops the candle on the floor and the fire on the candle goes out)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gasps, as the bell rings the clock lights up as he looks at the clock) Oh, no! Midnight! (Panting: running in the hallway where the wall is full of paintings &quot;Persistence of Memory&quot; appears as the clocks) Must... get... back to desk! (runs to the table, but it has enlarged. He jumps up) Whew, that was a close call. (notices his pants are missing and he screams) My pants! <br /> <br /> '''Pants''': Yoo hoo! Down here!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': You get up here! I gotta get back to work!<br /> <br /> '''Pants''': Freedom!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (runs out the door) Stop, pants! You get back here this instant! Pants! (tries to get back in, but it is locked. He looks in the window. The candle is still lit. The clock's face pops off, revealing a mouth)<br /> <br /> '''Clock''': (ghostly voice) Time's up, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> (The candle melts into Fire)<br /> <br /> '''Spongebob''': (gasps) Burning!<br /> <br /> '''Fire Wick''': Only 799 words to go! (laughs sinisterly and he burns it)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': No! (the inside of his house burns) What have I done? Help! Help! My house is on fire! (continues running around his burnt house until it comes to life)<br /> <br /> '''House''': SpongeBob, why? Why did you set me on fire, SpongeBob?! Why didn't you just write your essay?! Stop wasting time!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (wakes up from his nightmare and takes the pencil off his face) Where's my essay! Oh, there you are! I must've dosed off. Let's see, where are we? (the paper only reads &quot;The&quot;) Do I dare look at the clock? (looks at the clock, then gasps) It's almost 9:00! Class starts in five minutes! How am I going to write this whole paper in five minutes? How am I supposed to know what not to do at a stoplight? Feeding your snail is something not to do at a stoplight! And making a sandwich. And lighting candles! And driking water! And calling your friends! And karate chopping the TV! And shooting the breeze with the mailman. And falling asleep... (cut to SpongeBob, running to the boating school) Mrs. Puff! Mrs. Puff! I'm finished! All 800 words! I'm finished! Here it is! Mrs. Puff? (goes inside, but nobody is there) Where is everybody?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Oh, there you are, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Here you go, Mrs. Puff! All 800 words! All about stoplights and what not to do at 'em.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': I'm sorry, SpongeBob. I tried to call you! I have to go to a teacher's convention.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': But what about my essay?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Nah, I decided to cancel the assignment. We're just going to take a field trip to a stoplight instead. See you next week!<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob rips his essay. He then rips himself) <br /> <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 2}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> [[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 2]]<br /> [[de:Episodenmitschrift: Der Aufsatz]]<br /> {{slogan}}</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Procrastination 2010-12-30T01:07:24Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Characters */</p> <hr /> <div>{| border=&quot;1&quot;<br /> |-bgcolor=&quot;#CCCCCC&quot;<br /> !Back Episode Transcript<br /> !Next Episode Transcript<br /> |-<br /> |align=&quot;center&quot; rowspan=&quot;3&quot;|[[Episode Transcript: Krusty Love|Krusty Love]]<br /> |[[Episode Transcript: I'm with Stupid|I'm with Stupid]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> Episode Article: [[Procrastination (Episode)|Procrastination]]<br /> <br /> ==Characters==<br /> *[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br /> *[[Mrs. Puff]]<br /> *[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br /> *[[Gary the Snail|Gary]]<br /> *Class<br /> *Talking items (chair, pants, clock, fire and Pineapple house)<br /> *Mailman<br /> *Realistic Fish Head<br /> *[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]] (seen in a deleted scene)<br /> *[[Sandy Cheeks|Sandy]] (seen in a deleted scene)<br /> <br /> ==Dialogue==<br /> (the bell rings)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Ok, class, quiet, quiet. Now, get out your pencils and paper, and write down the assignment. <br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Did you hear that? We get an assignment!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Everyone must write an essay on What Not to Do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan again)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Did you hear that? What not to do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': In no less than 800 words. (squeals)<br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan again)<br /> <br /> '''Nat''': (acting like SpongeBob): Did you hear that? 800 words!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Yeah, I know!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Due tomorrow. And remember, class: work hard, and no goofing off.<br /> <br /> (back at SpongeBob's house)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Ok, Gary, no goofing off. I am about to write the greatest essay of all time. Like most great essays, it will be written on paper. Even more important than the paper is the pencil. A pencil is sharp or as dull as I like. Hmm.. funny thing, as my ideas grow, you shrink. Well, I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day to write an essay. (looks at window. It's colorful outside) Ok, here we go. What Not to Do at a Stoplight. Hey, this is easy! By SpongeBob SquarePants. Ah, this essay is pure gold. And now, pencil, get ready to do your stuff, because here we go! <br /> <br /> (The clock is shown. Several hours pass)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (has still only written 8 words) Gee, this is harder than I thought. (looks outside. There is a carnival. Squidward is suntanning. A kid is eating ice cream. Jellyfish are playing tennis. Gary is playing with a ball. Patrick is rubbing Sandy with sunscreen)<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Come on, SpongeBob!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': It should be against the law to have to write an essay on such a super sailorific, sunshiny day. (groans) But I must press onward. Because with this pencil, and the completion of this essay, I'll be one step closer to my driver's license! (a live-action drag race is shown. The car hits a wall, tumbles, and gets back up. Cut back to SpongeBob) Oh, yeah... This'll be no problemo. Why, I've got plenty of time. It's only six o'clock! Okay, okay, here we go. Here we go. (SpongeBob struggles to write) I know! I just need to get a little blood pumpin' in the old noodle. How about some callestetechs? (does callestetechs. While doing it, he recites &quot;Hup hoo&quot; several times) I can feel those juices pumpin' now.(moves his chair closer to the table. He does it a lot because of the fun noise it makes. He then laughs) Huh! What am I doing? I gotta write that paper. (pushes his chair in) Come on, pencil, make words.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Gary! Hey, hey, hey, Gary! How's my favorite mollusk? How about you and ol' SpongeBob fix you up something to eat?<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': What do you mean you're not hungry? <br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': I know I have an essay to write. Now, come on, Gary. (pours some food) I've got to make sure you get your nutrition, so I'm not leaving till you eat every single bite. (he takes up a ladder and fills it to ceiling-level. Gary quickly eats it) Gary, are you sure you don't want some crème brûlée? Or some choco-flavored algae bits? (sees a pile of food on the floor) Gee, Gary sure made a mess. I can't work on my essay, knowing there's a mess in the kitchen. (cleans it up) Hmm. I might as well clean the rest of the floor while I'm at it. I should get these hard-to-reach places too! And these dishes need to be cleaned! Can't have dirty garbage. (cut to SpongeBob, who has already finished) Well, I think it's clean enough now. (the kitchen is now chrome) Why, that didn't take too long. It's only...10:00! Oh. No more fooling around. I gotta get back to work. Okay, Mr. Essay, I say: prepare to be written! I'm doing it! I'm doing it! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! And some of these, and some of these! Almost there and... done. (sighs in relief) Now, let's see how it looks so far. The... Break time! Pacing always helps me think. Let's see, only 799 words to go. Think, SpongeBob, think. (looks at the telephone. Cut to Patrick in bed. His phone rings and he wakes up)<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Who's that? (picks up phone) Hello?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Hey, Patrick, what are you up to?<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Sleeping.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': That's really fascinating. Are you having a good sleep? Any dreams you'd like to discuss? I remember on the...<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': SpongeBob, you and I both know that you're just using me as a distraction so you don't have to write your essay.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gasps) That is not true! I called to have an engaging conversation with you!<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Well, I'm listening.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Uh...Marco!<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Polo. (hangs up)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (listening to a dial tone) Yeah, well, I gotta get going, Patrick. Got an important essay to write? (hangs up phone) Sheesh, what a chatterbox. Can't he see that I'm busy? I can't write with all these eraser shavings all over my paper! (throws them away) Now they're floating around my thinking space. (blows them away) So long, pesky particles! (chokes on one) I swallowed one! I'm choking! Water! Water! (goes to the kitchen and drinks water, then gasps in relief) That was a close one.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': What do you mean overly dramatic, Gary? All that choking sure made me hungry.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': I can't write on an empty stomach, Gary. I gotta have my brain food. (looking through his refrigerator) Now, let's see. White or rye bread...or pumpernickel? Gee, I guess it really depends on the meat inside. And the cheese. (doorbell rings) A visitor? For me? (opens the door) Hello!<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Package for Mr. SquarePants.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Great! Thanks! So, you like delivering mail?<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': It puts bread on the table.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Rye or pumpernickel? (laughs)<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Oh, brother.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': So, do you deliver your own mail? Or do you have your own mailperson? But then, who delivers his mail? Is there a never-ending chain of mailmen delivering mail to other mailmen? Well, I guess a P.O. box could, in theory, break the chain.<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Don't you have a paper to write?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': How did he know I'm supposed to be writing an essay? (blipping his eyes and slides back into the house)<br /> <br /> '''Realistic Fish Head''': In other news, local resident SpongeBob SquarePants only has a few hours left to complete his essay. And yet he continues to goof off. (his head leans through the TV screen into SpongeBob's face) When will he learn?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Hi-yah! (karate chops the TV causing a zap and the glass breaks. The room has a blackout and he lights a candle)<br /> <br /> '''Chair''': Hey! SpongeBob, over here! Come on. Take a seat. Put your feet up and relax. <br /> <br /> (Spongebob drops the candle on the floor and the fire on the candle goes out)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gasps, as the bell rings the clock lights up as he looks at the clock) Oh, no! Midnight! (Panting: running in the hallway where the wall is full of paintings &quot;Persistence of Memory&quot; appears as the clocks) Must... get... back to desk! (runs to the table, but it has enlarged. He jumps up) Whew, that was a close call. (notices his pants are missing and he screams) My pants! <br /> <br /> '''Pants''': Yoo hoo! Down here!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': You get up here! I gotta get back to work!<br /> <br /> '''Pants''': Freedom!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (runs out the door) Stop, pants! You get back here this instant! Pants! (tries to get back in, but it is locked. He looks in the window. The candle is still lit. The clock's face pops off, revealing a mouth)<br /> <br /> '''Clock''': (ghostly voice) Time's up, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> (The candle melts into Fire)<br /> <br /> '''Spongebob''': (gasps) Burning!<br /> <br /> '''Fire Wick''': Only 799 words to go! (laughs sinisterly and he burns it)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': No! (the inside of his house burns) What have I done? Help! Help! My house is on fire! (continues running around his burnt house until it comes to life)<br /> <br /> '''House''': SpongeBob, why? Why did you set me on fire, SpongeBob?! Why didn't you just write your essay?! Stop wasting time!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (wakes up from his nightmare and takes the pencil off his face) Where's my essay! Oh, there you are! I must've dosed off. Let's see, where are we? (the paper only reads &quot;The&quot;) Do I dare look at the clock? (looks at the clock, then gasps) It's almost 9:00! Class starts in five minutes! How am I going to write this whole paper in five minutes? How am I supposed to know what not to do at a stoplight? Feeding your snail is something not to do at a stoplight! And making a sandwich. And lighting candles! And driking water! And calling your friends! And karate chopping the TV! And shooting the breeze with the mailman. And falling asleep... (cut to SpongeBob, running to the boating school) Mrs. Puff! Mrs. Puff! I'm finished! All 800 words! I'm finished! Here it is! Mrs. Puff? (goes inside, but nobody is there) Where is everybody?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Oh, there you are, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Here you go, Mrs. Puff! All 800 words! All about stoplights and what not to do at 'em.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': I'm sorry, SpongeBob. I tried to call you! I have to go to a teacher's convention.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': But what about my essay?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Nah, I decided to cancel the assignment. We're just going to take a field trip to a stoplight instead. See you next week!<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob rips his essay. He then rips himself) <br /> <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 2}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> [[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 2]]<br /> [[de:Episodenmitschrift: Der Aufsatz]]<br /> {{slogan}}</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Procrastination 2010-12-30T00:59:05Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Dialogue */</p> <hr /> <div>{| border=&quot;1&quot;<br /> |-bgcolor=&quot;#CCCCCC&quot;<br /> !Back Episode Transcript<br /> !Next Episode Transcript<br /> |-<br /> |align=&quot;center&quot; rowspan=&quot;3&quot;|[[Episode Transcript: Krusty Love|Krusty Love]]<br /> |[[Episode Transcript: I'm with Stupid|I'm with Stupid]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> Episode Article: [[Procrastination (Episode)|Procrastination]]<br /> <br /> ==Characters==<br /> *[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br /> *[[Mrs. Puff]]<br /> *[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br /> *[[Gary the Snail|Gary]]<br /> *Class<br /> *Talking items<br /> *Mailman<br /> *Realistic Fish Head<br /> *French Narrator<br /> *[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]] (seen in a deleted scene)<br /> *[[Sandy Cheeks|Sandy]] [seen in a deleted scene]<br /> <br /> ==Dialogue==<br /> (the bell rings)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Ok, class, quiet, quiet. Now, get out your pencils and paper, and write down the assignment. <br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Did you hear that? We get an assignment!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Everyone must write an essay on What Not to Do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan again)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Did you hear that? What not to do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': In no less than 800 words. (squeals)<br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan again)<br /> <br /> '''Nat''': (acting like SpongeBob): Did you hear that? 800 words!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Yeah, I know!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Due tomorrow. And remember, class: work hard, and no goofing off.<br /> <br /> (back at SpongeBob's house)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Ok, Gary, no goofing off. I am about to write the greatest essay of all time. Like most great essays, it will be written on paper. Even more important than the paper is the pencil. A pencil is sharp or as dull as I like. Hmm.. funny thing, as my ideas grow, you shrink. Well, I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day to write an essay. (looks at window. It's colorful outside) Ok, here we go. What Not to Do at a Stoplight. Hey, this is easy! By SpongeBob SquarePants. Ah, this essay is pure gold. And now, pencil, get ready to do your stuff, because here we go! <br /> <br /> (The clock is shown. Several hours pass)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (has still only written 8 words) Gee, this is harder than I thought. (looks outside. There is a carnival. Squidward is suntanning. A kid is eating ice cream. Jellyfish are playing tennis. Gary is playing with a ball. Patrick is rubbing Sandy with sunscreen)<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Come on, SpongeBob!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': It should be against the law to have to write an essay on such a super sailorific, sunshiny day. (groans) But I must press onward. Because with this pencil, and the completion of this essay, I'll be one step closer to my driver's license! (a live-action drag race is shown. The car hits a wall, tumbles, and gets back up. Cut back to SpongeBob) Oh, yeah... This'll be no problemo. Why, I've got plenty of time. It's only six o'clock! Okay, okay, here we go. Here we go. (SpongeBob struggles to write) I know! I just need to get a little blood pumpin' in the old noodle. How about some callestetechs? (does callestetechs. While doing it, he recites &quot;Hup hoo&quot; several times) I can feel those juices pumpin' now.(moves his chair closer to the table. He does it a lot because of the fun noise it makes. He then laughs) Huh! What am I doing? I gotta write that paper. (pushes his chair in) Come on, pencil, make words.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Gary! Hey, hey, hey, Gary! How's my favorite mollusk? How about you and ol' SpongeBob fix you up something to eat?<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': What do you mean you're not hungry? <br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': I know I have an essay to write. Now, come on, Gary. (pours some food) I've got to make sure you get your nutrition, so I'm not leaving till you eat every single bite. (he takes up a ladder and fills it to ceiling-level. Gary quickly eats it) Gary, are you sure you don't want some crème brûlée? Or some choco-flavored algae bits? (sees a pile of food on the floor) Gee, Gary sure made a mess. I can't work on my essay, knowing there's a mess in the kitchen. (cleans it up) Hmm. I might as well clean the rest of the floor while I'm at it. I should get these hard-to-reach places too! And these dishes need to be cleaned! Can't have dirty garbage. (cut to SpongeBob, who has already finished) Well, I think it's clean enough now. (the kitchen is now chrome) Why, that didn't take too long. It's only...10:00! Oh. No more fooling around. I gotta get back to work. Okay, Mr. Essay, I say: prepare to be written! I'm doing it! I'm doing it! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! And some of these, and some of these! Almost there and... done. (sighs in relief) Now, let's see how it looks so far. The... Break time! Pacing always helps me think. Let's see, only 799 words to go. Think, SpongeBob, think. (looks at the telephone. Cut to Patrick in bed. His phone rings and he wakes up)<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Who's that? (picks up phone) Hello?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Hey, Patrick, what are you up to?<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Sleeping.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': That's really fascinating. Are you having a good sleep? Any dreams you'd like to discuss? I remember on the...<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': SpongeBob, you and I both know that you're just using me as a distraction so you don't have to write your essay.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gasps) That is not true! I called to have an engaging conversation with you!<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Well, I'm listening.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Uh...Marco!<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Polo. (hangs up)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (listening to a dial tone) Yeah, well, I gotta get going, Patrick. Got an important essay to write? (hangs up phone) Sheesh, what a chatterbox. Can't he see that I'm busy? I can't write with all these eraser shavings all over my paper! (throws them away) Now they're floating around my thinking space. (blows them away) So long, pesky particles! (chokes on one) I swallowed one! I'm choking! Water! Water! (goes to the kitchen and drinks water, then gasps in relief) That was a close one.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': What do you mean overly dramatic, Gary? All that choking sure made me hungry.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': I can't write on an empty stomach, Gary. I gotta have my brain food. (looking through his refrigerator) Now, let's see. White or rye bread...or pumpernickel? Gee, I guess it really depends on the meat inside. And the cheese. (doorbell rings) A visitor? For me? (opens the door) Hello!<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Package for Mr. SquarePants.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Great! Thanks! So, you like delivering mail?<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': It puts bread on the table.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Rye or pumpernickel? (laughs)<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Oh, brother.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': So, do you deliver your own mail? Or do you have your own mailperson? But then, who delivers his mail? Is there a never-ending chain of mailmen delivering mail to other mailmen? Well, I guess a P.O. box could, in theory, break the chain.<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Don't you have a paper to write?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': How did he know I'm supposed to be writing an essay? (blipping his eyes and slides back into the house)<br /> <br /> '''Realistic Fish Head''': In other news, local resident SpongeBob SquarePants only has a few hours left to complete his essay. And yet he continues to goof off. (his head leans through the TV screen into SpongeBob's face) When will he learn?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Hi-yah! (karate chops the TV causing a zap and the glass breaks. The room has a blackout and he lights a candle)<br /> <br /> '''Chair''': Hey! SpongeBob, over here! Come on. Take a seat. Put your feet up and relax. <br /> <br /> (Spongebob drops the candle on the floor and the fire on the candle goes out)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gasps, as the bell rings the clock lights up as he looks at the clock) Oh, no! Midnight! (Panting: running in the hallway where the wall is full of paintings &quot;Persistence of Memory&quot; appears as the clocks) Must... get... back to desk! (runs to the table, but it has enlarged. He jumps up) Whew, that was a close call. (notices his pants are missing and he screams) My pants! <br /> <br /> '''Pants''': Yoo hoo! Down here!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': You get up here! I gotta get back to work!<br /> <br /> '''Pants''': Freedom!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (runs out the door) Stop, pants! You get back here this instant! Pants! (tries to get back in, but it is locked. He looks in the window. The candle is still lit. The clock's face pops off, revealing a mouth)<br /> <br /> '''Clock''': (ghostly voice) Time's up, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> (The candle melts into Fire)<br /> <br /> '''Spongebob''': (gasps) Burning!<br /> <br /> '''Fire Wick''': Only 799 words to go! (laughs sinisterly and he burns it)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': No! (the inside of his house burns) What have I done? Help! Help! My house is on fire! (continues running around his burnt house until it comes to life)<br /> <br /> '''House''': SpongeBob, why? Why did you set me on fire, SpongeBob?! Why didn't you just write your essay?! Stop wasting time!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (wakes up from his nightmare and takes the pencil off his face) Where's my essay! Oh, there you are! I must've dosed off. Let's see, where are we? (the paper only reads &quot;The&quot;) Do I dare look at the clock? (looks at the clock, then gasps) It's almost 9:00! Class starts in five minutes! How am I going to write this whole paper in five minutes? How am I supposed to know what not to do at a stoplight? Feeding your snail is something not to do at a stoplight! And making a sandwich. And lighting candles! And driking water! And calling your friends! And karate chopping the TV! And shooting the breeze with the mailman. And falling asleep... (cut to SpongeBob, running to the boating school) Mrs. Puff! Mrs. Puff! I'm finished! All 800 words! I'm finished! Here it is! Mrs. Puff? (goes inside, but nobody is there) Where is everybody?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Oh, there you are, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Here you go, Mrs. Puff! All 800 words! All about stoplights and what not to do at 'em.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': I'm sorry, SpongeBob. I tried to call you! I have to go to a teacher's convention.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': But what about my essay?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Nah, I decided to cancel the assignment. We're just going to take a field trip to a stoplight instead. See you next week!<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob rips his essay. He then rips himself) <br /> <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 2}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> [[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 2]]<br /> [[de:Episodenmitschrift: Der Aufsatz]]<br /> {{slogan}}</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Procrastination 2010-12-30T00:55:20Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Dialogue */</p> <hr /> <div>{| border=&quot;1&quot;<br /> |-bgcolor=&quot;#CCCCCC&quot;<br /> !Back Episode Transcript<br /> !Next Episode Transcript<br /> |-<br /> |align=&quot;center&quot; rowspan=&quot;3&quot;|[[Episode Transcript: Krusty Love|Krusty Love]]<br /> |[[Episode Transcript: I'm with Stupid|I'm with Stupid]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> Episode Article: [[Procrastination (Episode)|Procrastination]]<br /> <br /> ==Characters==<br /> *[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br /> *[[Mrs. Puff]]<br /> *[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br /> *[[Gary the Snail|Gary]]<br /> *Class<br /> *Talking items<br /> *Mailman<br /> *Realistic Fish Head<br /> *French Narrator<br /> *[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]] (seen in a deleted scene)<br /> *[[Sandy Cheeks|Sandy]] [seen in a deleted scene]<br /> <br /> ==Dialogue==<br /> (the bell rings)<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Ok, class, quiet, quiet. Now, get out your pencils and paper, and write down the assignment. <br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Did you hear that? We get an assignment!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Everyone must write an essay on What Not to Do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan again)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Did you hear that? What not to do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': In no less than 800 words. (squeals)<br /> <br /> '''Students''': (groan again)<br /> <br /> '''Nat''': (acting like SpongeBob): Did you hear that? 800 words!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Yeah, I know!<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Due tomorrow. And remember, class: work hard, and no goofing off.<br /> <br /> (back at SpongeBob's house)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Ok, Gary, no goofing off. I am about to write the greatest essay of all time. Like most great essays, it will be written on paper. Even more important than the paper is the pencil. A pencil is sharp or as dull as I like. Hmm.. funny thing, as my ideas grow, you shrink. Well, I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day to write an essay. (looks at window. It's colorful outside) Ok, here we go. What Not to Do at a Stoplight. Hey, this is easy! By SpongeBob SquarePants. Ah, this essay is pure gold. And now, pencil, get ready to do your stuff, because here we go! <br /> <br /> (The clock is shown. Several hours pass)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (has still only written 8 words) Gee, this is harder than I thought. (looks outside. There is a carnival. Squidward is suntanning. A kid is eating ice cream. Jellyfish are playing tennis. Gary is playing with a ball. Patrick is rubbing Sandy with sunscreen)<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Come on, SpongeBob!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': It should be against the law to have to write an essay on such a super sailorific, sunshiny day. (groans) But I must press onward. Because with this pencil, and the completion of this essay, I'll be one step closer to my driver's license! (a live-action drag race is shown. The car hits a wall, tumbles, and gets back up. Cut back to SpongeBob) Oh, yeah... This'll be no problemo. Why, I've got plenty of time. It's only six o'clock! Okay, okay, here we go. Here we go. (SpongeBob struggles to write) I know! I just need to get a little blood pumpin' in the old noodle. How about some callestetechs? (does callestetechs. While doing it, he recites &quot;Hup hoo&quot; several times) I can feel those juices pumpin' now.(moves his chair closer to the table. He does it a lot because of the fun noise it makes. He then laughs) Huh! What am I doing? I gotta write that paper. (pushes his chair in) Come on, pencil, make words.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Gary! Hey, hey, hey, Gary! How's my favorite mollusk? How about you and ol' SpongeBob fix you up something to eat?<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': What do you mean you're not hungry? <br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': I know I have an essay to write. Now, come on, Gary. (pours some food) I've got to make sure you get your nutrition, so I'm not leaving till you eat every single bite. (he takes up a ladder and fills it to ceiling-level. Gary quickly eats it) Gary, are you sure you don't want some crème brûlée? Or some choco-flavored algae bits? (sees a pile of food on the floor) Gee, Gary sure made a mess. I can't work on my essay, knowing there's a mess in the kitchen. (cleans it up) Hmm. I might as well clean the rest of the floor while I'm at it. I should get these hard-to-reach places too! And these dishes need to be cleaned! Can't have dirty garbage. (cut to SpongeBob, who has already finished) Well, I think it's clean enough now. (the kitchen is now chrome) Why, that didn't take too long. It's only...10:00! Oh. No more fooling around. I gotta get back to work. Okay, Mr. Essay, I say: prepare to be written! I'm doing it! I'm doing it! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! And some of these, and some of these! Almost there and... done. (sighs in relief) Now, let's see how it looks so far. The... Break time! Pacing always helps me think. Let's see, only 799 words to go. Think, SpongeBob, think. (looks at the telephone. Cut to Patrick in bed. His phone rings and he wakes up)<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Who's that? (picks up phone) Hello?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Hey, Patrick, what are you up to?<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Sleeping.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': That's really fascinating. Are you having a good sleep? Any dreams you'd like to discuss? I remember on the...<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': SpongeBob, you and I both know that you're just using me as a distraction so you don't have to write your essay.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gasps) That is not true! I called to have an engaging conversation with you!<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Well, I'm listening.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Uh...Marco!<br /> <br /> '''Patrick''': Polo. (hangs up)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (listening to a dial tone) Yeah, well, I gotta get going, Patrick. Got an important essay to write? (hangs up phone) Sheesh, what a chatterbox. Can't he see that I'm busy? I can't write with all these eraser shavings all over my paper! (throws them away) Now they're floating around my thinking space. (blows them away) So long, pesky particles! (chokes on one) I swallowed one! I'm choking! Water! Water! (goes to the kitchen and drinks water, then gasps in relief) That was a close one.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': What do you mean overly dramatic, Gary? All that choking sure made me hungry.<br /> <br /> '''Gary''': Meow.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': I can't write on an empty stomach, Gary. I gotta have my brain food. (looking through his refrigerator) Now, let's see. White or rye bread...or pumpernickel? Gee, I guess it really depends on the meat inside. And the cheese. (doorbell rings) A visitor? For me? (opens the door) Hello!<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Package for Mr. SquarePants.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Great! Thanks! So, you like delivering mail?<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': It puts bread on the table.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Rye or pumpernickel? (laughs)<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Oh, brother.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': So, do you deliver your own mail? Or do you have your own mailperson? But then, who delivers his mail? Is there a never-ending chain of mailmen delivering mail to other mailmen? Well, I guess a P.O. box could, in theory, break the chain.<br /> <br /> '''Mailman''': Don't you have a paper to write?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': How did he know I'm supposed to be writing an essay? (blipping his eyes and slides back into the house)<br /> <br /> '''Realistic Fish Head''': In other news, local resident SpongeBob SquarePants only has a few hours left to complete his essay. And yet he continues to goof off. (his head leans through the TV screen into SpongeBob's face) When will he learn?<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Hi-yah! (karate chops the TV causing a zap and the glass breaks. The room has a blackout and He lights a candle)<br /> <br /> '''Chair''': Hey! SpongeBob, over here! Come on. Take a seat. Put your feet up and relax. <br /> <br /> (Spongebob drops the candle and the fire on the candle goes out)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (gasps, as the bell rings the clock lights up as he looks at the clock) Oh, no! Midnight! (running in the hallway panting. this is where a wall full of paintings &quot;Persistence of Memory&quot; appears...) Must... get... back to desk! (runs to the table, but it has enlarged. He jumps up) Whew, that was a close call. (notices his pants are missing) Ah! My pants! <br /> <br /> '''Pants''': Yoo hoo! Down here!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': You get up here! I gotta get back to work!<br /> <br /> '''Pants''': Freedom!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (runs out the door) Stop, pants! You get back here this instant! Pants! (tries to get back in, but it is locked. He looks in the window. The candle is still lit. The clock's face pops off, revealing a mouth)<br /> <br /> '''Clock''': (ghostly voice) Time's up, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> (The candle melts into Fire)<br /> <br /> '''Spongebob''': (gasps) Burning!<br /> <br /> '''Fire Wick''': Only 799 words to go! (laughs sinisterly and he burns it)<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': No! (the inside of his house burns) What have I done? Help! Help! My house is on fire! (continues running around his burnt house until it comes to life)<br /> <br /> '''House''': SpongeBob, why? Why did you set me on fire, SpongeBob?! Why didn't you just write your essay?! Stop wasting time!<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': (wakes up from his nightmare and takes the pencil off his face) Where's my essay! Oh, there you are! I must've dosed off. Let's see, where are we? (the paper only reads &quot;The&quot;) Do I dare look at the clock? (looks at the clock, then gasps) It's almost 9:00! Class starts in five minutes! How am I going to write this whole paper in five minutes? How am I supposed to know what not to do at a stoplight? Feeding your snail is something not to do at a stoplight! And making a sandwich. And lighting candles! And driking water! And calling your friends! And karate chopping the TV! And shooting the breeze with the mailman. And falling asleep... (cut to SpongeBob, running to the boating school) Mrs. Puff! Mrs. Puff! I'm finished! All 800 words! I'm finished! Here it is! Mrs. Puff? (goes inside, but nobody is there) Where is everybody?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Oh, there you are, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': Here you go, Mrs. Puff! All 800 words! All about stoplights and what not to do at 'em.<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': I'm sorry, SpongeBob. I tried to call you! I have to go to a teacher's convention.<br /> <br /> '''SpongeBob''': But what about my essay?<br /> <br /> '''Mrs. Puff''': Nah, I decided to cancel the assignment. We're just going to take a field trip to a stoplight instead. See you next week!<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob rips his essay. He then rips himself) <br /> <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 2}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> [[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 2]]<br /> [[de:Episodenmitschrift: Der Aufsatz]]<br /> {{slogan}}</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Atlantis_SquarePantis 2010-12-29T23:27:03Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* SpongeBob's Segment Part 2 */</p> <hr /> <div>Characters<br /> SpongeBob <br /> Patrick <br /> Lord Royal Highness <br /> Squidward <br /> Sandy <br /> Mr. Krabs <br /> Plankton <br /> Guards <br /> Patchy the Pirate <br /> Potty the Parrot <br /> [edit]Dialogue<br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> == Patchy's Segment Part 1 ==<br /> <br /> Patchy: Let's go! (Patchy honks) <br /> <br /> Patchy: Hey, kids. Rush hour traffic here in Encino is really bad. <br /> <br /> Patchy: A little music should calm my jangled nerve. Here's how my dash-in-stereo works. (Patchy breaks his radio) <br /> <br /> Patchy: Oh! Me ultra-rare-back-on-track destroyed! <br /> <br /> Patchy: And I'm gonna miss the new SpongeBob cartoon if this traffic doesn't move soon! (Patchy cries) <br /> <br /> Patchy: (Patchy's cell phone rings) Who's calling? <br /> <br /> Patchy: Yes, patchy, here, start talking. <br /> <br /> Potty: Hey, patchy, the new spongebob cartoon is about to start. <br /> <br /> Potty: Where are you, brawk? <br /> <br /> Patchy: Stuck on the 1.0.1. Be a dear and record it for me, will you? <br /> <br /> Potty: Oh, I threw out the machine in the garbage, brawk! <br /> <br /> Patchy: You what?!? <br /> <br /> Potty: Oh, calm down, beauty. <br /> <br /> Patchy: Potty, you know how important this cartoon is to me! <br /> <br /> Patchy: (Someone honks at patchy) Do you mind? I'm trying to talk to my parrot! <br /> <br /> Patchy: Sorry, potty. Just some landlubber. (dial tone rings) <br /> <br /> Patchy: Potty? Potty? Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello? <br /> <br /> Patchy: Guah. Dropped again. (Patchy closes his phone) Ahh! <br /> <br /> Patchy: Curse this traffic! Oooooh! (Patchy grunts) <br /> <br /> Patchy: Ahh, home at last. What the? (His eyes break the sunglasses) <br /> <br /> Patchy: Encino... it's gone. Noooooooooooooooo! (Patchy cries) <br /> <br /> Patchy: You know, kids, this reminds Patchy of a story. <br /> <br /> Patchy: Another lost city. Why don't you go check it out? <br /> <br /> Patchy: No..... Encino! <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> == SpongeBob's Segment Part 1 ==<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob and Patrick are blowing bubbles.) <br /> <br /> Patrick: A beautiful specimen, SpongeBob <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Hurry Patrick, Hurry! (Patrick takes a photo of the bubble) How's it look, buddy? Ready for the old scrapbook? <br /> <br /> Patrick: More like the scrap-heap. They never come out right! Oh well, let's try again. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Ok Patrick, this ones gonna be my masterpiece. <br /> <br /> Patrick: I'm ready. (SpongeBob blows a bubble in his image.) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob Bubble: Hi, Patrick! <br /> <br /> Patrick: (Misses a photo of the bubble) Oh, I missed it again! Well, this darn camera isn't fast enough. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Hold on a second, Patrick! Its not the poor camera's fault you cant get a photo <br /> <br /> Patrick: It's not? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: No, it's the very nature of the fragile bubble. <br /> <br /> Patrick: It IS? <br /> <br /> Spongebob: Yes it is my friend, allow me to demonstrate. <br /> <br /> Song <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: The sun, must set: at the end of every day. And the curtain, must fall: at the end of every play. And every little bubble ever blown must some-day, POP! <br /> <br /> Patrick: Like presents, on Christmas day: it doesn't seem to stay. Or a cheese souffle, it doesn't last all day. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: I will try: again. To blow a bubble, that will last all day. <br /> <br /> Patrick: All day. <br /> <br /> [SpongeBob begins to blow a giant bubble, it captures them both and floats away] <br /> <br /> Patrick: Um, SpongeBob? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Not now, Patrick, this bubble's gonna break all records! <br /> <br /> Patrick: Well I hope it doesn't break until we get a bit closer to the ground <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Huh? (looks down) What have I done!? (The two start screaming as the bubble drifts into a cave.) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: We'll never get out of here! <br /> <br /> Patrick: NO! <br /> <br /> (The bubble is popped by a jagged point on a half of a broken amulet) <br /> <br /> Patrick: What happened? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (pointing to broken amulet) That's what happened <br /> <br /> Patrick: Whoa, what is it? It looks really old. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob; Antis. What do think that means, Patrick? <br /> <br /> Patrick: Antis, Antis...SquarePantis! Probably belonged to your ancient ancestors. (Picks up the half of the amulet) SpongeBob SquarePantis, you must wear the ancient crest of your ancestors for it is your birth right! (shoves into SpongeBob's face) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (Falling) My birth right!? Ow ooh, Ow ooh ow! Let's take this to the Bikini Bottom museum, they'll know what it is! <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: (Whistles) Oo...uh...beautiful day for standing outside a museum doin' nothin', huh?. <br /> <br /> Security Guard: Whatever you say. <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: (Mr Krabs pretends to be administration) Hello there. Welcome to the museum! That'll be three dollars. <br /> <br /> Old Lady: But I thought it was free Tuesday? <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: No no no. Today's Monday, otherwise I wouldn't be wearing this 'I hate Mondays' shirt. <br /> <br /> Old Lady: Good point. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Enjoy the artifacts! (Mutters under breath:) Don't stand in one place too long, people might mistake you for one. (Hears SpongeBob laughing) SpongeBob! Hew, that was a close one. (Old lady points him out to a security guard then Mr. Krabs runs inside) <br /> <br /> Squidward: Neptune's Ascension. The only surviving painting from the great lost city of Atlantis. This is just what the doctor ordered, Squiddy. Spending your day studying the Atlantean masters. And best of all, no Sponge... (SpongeBob and Patrick run in excitedly, knocking Squidward over.) AAAAAHHHHH! Oh, would you to watch where you're... (Gasps) What is that? What are you doing with the Amulet of Atlantis? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: We were just...[Cut off by Squidward] <br /> <br /> Squidward: (Gasps) You're going to steal it!? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: No Squidward, we'd never.... [Cut off by Squidward] <br /> <br /> Squidward: This is a new low, even for YOU TWO. Lucky for you, I was here today. Stealing artifacts could land you in the stony loneso...ahh! ahh! ahh! ome! You boobs found the missing half to the Atlantean Amulet!? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: What's an Atlantean omelet? <br /> <br /> Squidward: AMULET, NOT OMELET!!!! It's the key to untold riches! <br /> <br /> [Mr Krabs shoves Spongebob and Patrick over violently and faces Squidward] Mr Krabs: Did somebody say untold riches!? <br /> <br /> Squidward: Yes Eugene. The streets are lined with gold, and the street lights are made with diamonds. <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: DIAMOND LIGHT BULBS!!!??? I wonder what they make the money out of? <br /> <br /> Squidward: For reasons unknown, this great city disappeared one day, but no ruins were ever found. All the inventions that you take for granted, were given to us by the Atlanteans. Their advances in art, financial wealth and weaponry were eons ahead of their time! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Why is this bubble painted on the mural? <br /> <br /> Squidward: That's just the oldest living bubble <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: The oldest living bubble, alive! Behold Patrick-the oldest living bubble! <br /> <br /> Patrick: This is the most beautiful bubble I've ever seen! <br /> <br /> Squidward: That's just a painting you quarter-wit! Ha, quarter-wit, it's less than half. The real bubble lives in Atlantis, some darn old bubble hails in comparison to the art, <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: Money, <br /> <br /> (Sandy very suddenly arrives out of nowhere) Sandy: And science, don't forget science. Whats all the hubbub boys? <br /> <br /> Squidward: These two chowder-brains found the missing half of the Amulet. <br /> <br /> Sandy: THE AMULET OF ATLANTIS!!!!???? Legend says, that when the two halves are joined, the path to Atlantis is opened! What ya all waitin' on? Let's hitch them two doggies up! Go on Squidward! <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: Hurry up Squidward, that money ain't gettin' any younger [Squidward connects the two halves and a bright light activates] <br /> <br /> Squidward: (Happily) <br /> <br /> Sandy: (In Disbelief) <br /> <br /> Patrick: Aaaaaaaaahhhhhh! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Hoo hoo yeah, hoo hoo hoo! <br /> <br /> [A bus drops from the ceiling] <br /> <br /> Squidward: The magical path to Atlantis is a Van? <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: Nice hot rod flames! <br /> <br /> Patrick: [Coin spins and attaches itself to the van] What's it doing? <br /> <br /> Sandy: Well, holly-wally ding-dang-doo. Would ya' look at that!? Take a gander, y'all! <br /> <br /> Squidward: Fabulous decor! <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: Quite a vessel, but who's manning it? <br /> <br /> Robot: Greetings. Welcome aboard the Sea Ship Atlantis. This is a non-stop trip, so please take a seat, relax, and we'll be on our way. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Bet there's some loose change in here! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Ah, so this is what luxury feels like. <br /> <br /> Squidward: Ah, what I wouldn't give for a foot-rub. <br /> <br /> Robot: Attention passengers, regretfully we lack the fuel needed for forward motion. <br /> <br /> Unison: What!? <br /> <br /> (Cut to a gas station) <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: Is this some kind of joke? Where's the gas tank? <br /> <br /> Robot: We Atlanteans find the use of fossil fuels to be counter-intuitive, and have developed an alternative source we call song. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Huh? <br /> <br /> Robot: The engine of this vessel is fueled by song, the more you sing of you desires, the closer to Atlantis you will get. Let us commence singing. <br /> <br /> Squidward: Does that make any sense? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: No, but I'm game for singing any day! (in song) Sing? Sing a song? A song of wanting to move along! To a land where all our dre-e. (The bus lifts but drops when SpongeBob hits a wrong note) [normally] Whoops, sorry. (in song) To a land where all our dreeeeeams, can finally come true. A bubble I long for, that so eludes me, but soon enough I will seeeeeeeeeeeeeee............ <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: Well that's just splendid boy! A land where it rains money! More than you can spend. With fives and tens and fifties and I'll want to be your friend. <br /> <br /> Plankton: Ha, ha ha. Such a valiant desire-hehehe. The lost weapons of Atlantis-the most advanced of all time. As soon as this dopey song is done I plan to make them miiiiine! <br /> <br /> Sandy: Did you all hear something? I can hardly believe that there's a lost city where having smarts is more important-than being pretty! With all their advanced science, and my painfully large mind! <br /> <br /> Sandy #2: [Clone] I bet we can figure out how to make wondrous things, like melons with edible rinds! <br /> <br /> Squidward: As a connoisseur of fine art, I'm proud to say! I've always seen things in my own special way! 'Art'-lantis with their glorious aesthetics, I'll cop their style in a while- my art will be prophetic! <br /> <br /> Patrick: I'm Patrick, I'm Patrick, Patrick-Patrick-Patrick! And I like um, uuuuh, I don't know what I like. <br /> <br /> Robot: Warning, you have run out of song fuel. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidward, Sandy, and Mr. Krabs: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! <br /> <br /> Squidward: Hey look, it's Atlantis. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Pretty! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob, Patrick, Squidward, Sandy, and Mr. Krabs: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! [Bus crashes) <br /> <br /> Squidward: You dimwits haven't even been here two minutes and you've already messed up someone's topiary garden. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Go on, SpongeBob. Ring the bell. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Ring for the king, huh? <br /> <br /> Lord Royal Highness: Welcome to Atlantis. I've been expecting you. Allow me to introduce myself. I am the Lord Royal Highness, but my friends call me LRH. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: My friends call me SpongeBob. I'm here to see the oldest bubble. <br /> <br /> LRH: Yes, of course. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: What a ripoff! This street ain't gold! <br /> <br /> LRH: Oh, if it's gold you want, you'll find it in our vault. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: I'm Eugene. I like money. <br /> <br /> LRH: Yes, I can see that. Pleasure to meet you. Come, I'll give you the grand tour of our Atlantean fortress. I'm so glad you're all here... <br /> <br /> Plankton: They're gone. Now to get to those weapons... Trapped! Ok, what do I have to work with here? What's this? Owner's manual!? Looks like I've found my escape route! (Laughs diabolically) Ow! <br /> <br /> LRH: For centuries, we Atlanteans spent, nay, wasted our talents and energy building the most sophisticated weaponry to defend ourselves from invaders. But we abandoned the idea of warfare long ago and now all these weapons gather dust behind this locked door as an example of what must be done if one wishes to live in harmony with all creatures of this, or any, world. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: (sighs) Eh, harmony shmarmony. When do we get to see the treasure?! <br /> <br /> LRH: But of course, follow me. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Comin' through, boys! (Everybody frowns at Mr. Krabs when he passes in front of them rudley) <br /> <br /> Plankton: These Atlanteans leave a room full of the most advanced weaponry unguarded? No wonder they got lost. (Squeezes under door) Oh, my! There will be no one to stop me this time! (Laughs diabolically) <br /> <br /> <br /> == Patchy's Segment Part 2 ==<br /> <br /> Patchy: Well, bad news, kids. Encino's still lost. <br /> <br /> Patchy: Oh! But, at least I got me radio fixed! (Patchy snaps his fingers while listening to it, then, it explodes) <br /> <br /> Patchy: Well, enjoy the rest of the show. <br /> <br /> (THE REST OF THIS TRANSCRIPT IS WRITTEN BY ME, SPONGY PATTY)[ <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> == SpongeBob's Segment Part 2 ==<br /> LRH: It is both an honor and a pleasure to welcome you all to Atlantis. We haven't had <br /> visitors in quite some time. You see being a lost city has certain disadvantages, <br /> which I digress. Now if you'll just follow me, I'll show you our grandest achievements. <br /> (Mr. Krabs grabs Squidward) <br /> <br /> Mr Krabs: Squidward! You told me the streets were paved with gold! Now, that street light better be a 600 karot diamond or else! (Starts unscrewing a light bulb) <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Hold still, Squidward! <br /> <br /> Squidward: (straining) You're standing on my neck! <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: (finds out light bulb is an ordinary one) What!? (falls) <br /> <br /> LRH: Are you alright? <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Yes, I feel odd. (acts wierdly) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Mr. Krabs, are you ok? <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: I know that smell anywhere. Me pockets! They be smelling loot! (He smells money, and his pockets bark and direct him to the Treasure Room, the pockets eat the money) <br /> <br /> LRH: Those pockets of yours really have a thing for treasure. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: These are me hounds to me pants. <br /> <br /> LRH: What you see here is a glimpse of ancient Atlantean history. Long ago we abandoned our obsession with wealth to focus on the pursuit of knowledge. So help yourself to as much as your pockets can carry. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: As much as me pockets can carry? <br /> <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs (Singing): Oh, if I'd only known when I woke up today, I'd have stopped at me tailors along the way, and had ten more pockets put on me pants, 'cause I think I hear a money avalanche! Look at all this cash, hey, look at all this money! I hope me heart can take it! <br /> <br /> Doctor (Not Singing): Clear! (Shocks Krabs) <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs (Singing): I'm alright, sonny! Industrial accidents can make quite a mess. Unless you fall into a money press. Oh, make me into money, Mr. wonderful machine, I always knew that me true color was green! Oh, ever since I was a little kid, I dreamed of such a place, yes I did! With mountains of money, and rivers of cash. And a pool of coins to make a splash! Oh, I'll open up a Krusty Krab with patties made of money. They'd be delicious, and expensive, and taste like golden honey! Money and gold and treasure untold! And all of it for me!<br /> <br /> SONG OVER <br /> <br /> LRH: Mr. Krabs! We're off to see the bubble! Would you care to join us? <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Are you kiddin'? I just got here! (Dives into the money) <br /> <br /> LRH: Very well, then. Off we go. <br /> <br /> Patrick: (Under breath) Spongebob, when are we gonna see the bubble? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Patrick! Shh! <br /> <br /> LRH: Don't dally, lads. We don't want to be left behind, do we? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (Salute) No, sir! Come on along, Patrick! <br /> <br /> Sandy: You know, LRH, I was born with a healthy scientific curiosity and I was wondering if I could get a peek at some of your scientific achievements? <br /> <br /> LRH: Of course, Miss Cheeks. Here we are, the combination of all of our technology. I give you the Atlantean Hall, of Science. (Opens the door, a lot of futuristic gadgets are seen) <br /> <br /> Sandy: Hoppin' acorns! Look at all this hi-tech gear! (Looks at one invention) What does this gizmo do? <br /> <br /> LRH: It's a bio-mass converting device. It can take any house-hold object, (puts a comb on the platform, it goes in) this comb for example, and turn it into say, ice cream! (Presses a button and ice cream pops out) Would anyone like to try it? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob and Patrick: Oh! Oh! Me! Me! <br /> <br /> LRH: Go ahead! (Hands them spoons, they eat) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Mmm! Comb flavored! <br /> <br /> Sandy: What else can it turn things into? <br /> <br /> LRH: Actually it can only turn things into ice cream. We haven't worked that bug out, yet. But I can show you the most amazing/fantasic device created by Atlantean hands. (Shows them a big machine) Behold. This grand machine allows the user to be broken down into nano-stature, enabling them to battle germs hand-to-hand. <br /> <br /> Sandy: How's it work? <br /> <br /> LRH: Please take a seat and I'll explain. (They do so, and metal gears go on their heads) Now, here's how it works-- <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Hey cool! (He pushes the center button and disappears into thin air) <br /> <br /> Patrick: Where'd SpongeBob go? <br /> <br /> LRH: Right now his molecules are being broken down into data. Which is assembled into this computer, and stored on these tapes. Then reassembled on a much smaller scale-- <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Someone help me! <br /> <br /> LRH: And finally passes through this tube and into this tank which contains every element known to-- (looks closer) Oh, dear heavens! It looks like our scientists were working on a very agressive case of the sniffles. He could be in trouble! <br /> <br /> Patrick: Don't worry, SpongeBob! I'm coming to help you! (Pushes the center button and disappears like SpongeBob) <br /> <br /> Squidward: (Desprate) Okay, I've seen enough. Let me outta this thing! (Pushes the center button rapidly hoping it will get the gear off his head, he disappears and goes into an 8-bit game) What's going on here, I-- oh no! Ah!(He sees a runny nose) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Squidward, don't make any sudden movements! (The nose sneezes out four germs and Squidward falls over, jumps rapidly, and runs) <br /> <br /> Squidward: Help, aah! (Spongebob and Patrick follow, the germs chase them, and Sandy beams in) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob, Patrick, and Squidward: HELP, SANDY!!! <br /> <br /> Sandy: Sounds like thems critters is in trouble! (The nose puts Spongebob, Patrick and Squidward in it, and the germs guard Sandy from getting to them) <br /> <br /> Sandy: Hold on, fellas! I'll be there soon, as soon as I send these critters to their doom! (A title screen shows like a Nintendo game) <br /> <br /> MISSION START <br /> <br /> THE GERM WARRIROR <br /> <br /> PLAYER 4 START <br /> <br /> (c) NICKELDEON 1991 <br /> <br /> Sandy (Singing): Look out, germs. The end is here, Your days are numbered, 'cause Sandy's here! I'll get these germs, and make 'em pay, with some good old fashioned ka-rah-tey. (Hi-yah!) If I borrow some elements from the periodic table I can mix up a brew that is sure to disable any virus, bug, or sniffle that steps into my path. And make them feel my mi-cro-sco-pic wrath!!!!! Hi-yah! (Hits the nose with a submarine and defeats it, the gang flies out, they all cheer) <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> GAME<br /> OVER<br /> <br /> LRH: Well, shall we continue on with the rest of the tour? <br /> <br /> Sandy: Y'all head out without me. (Hits the center button, going in again) <br /> <br /> LRH: Well then, good luck. Have fun. We'll see you at dinner. (to SpongeBob) Your friend Sandy certainly is an exciteable one. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Quite. <br /> <br /> Squidward: Somehow I knew I'd get stuck with you yahoo's the longest. <br /> <br /> (In the heater vent behind Squidward is Plankton, who chuckles as he found the weapons) <br /> <br /> Plankton (Singing): Oh, what a beautiful sight! Weapons as far as the eye can see. But which one will be right for me? How do I pick? Which one will do the trick? Which is best to guarantee eternal rest? So many weapons! How do I choose? Look at this one with a beatiful fuse! And with this one I couldn't lose. That one will surely give them the blues..... And this one here matches my shoes! Come on, Plankton, just pick one and forget about your shoes! Eeny, meeny, minie moe, I pick you, now let's go! (Chooses a huge tank, cut to LRH giving the tour) <br /> <br /> Squidward: This stuff is wonderful and all but when are we going to see some real Atlantean culture? <br /> <br /> LRH: Gentlemen? What is art? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Oh, oh! I know, I know! (Squidward violently shoves SpongeBob so he can fit in frame) <br /> <br /> Squidward: I thought you'd never ask! Art is the conscious arrangement of elements in a manner that effects a sense of beauty. <br /> <br /> LRH: Not even close! (Squidward looks shocked) Art is what happens when you learn to dream. (Hands SpongeBob a blue paint brush) Go ahead. Dream a little. (He hits the wall and it magically turns into Spongebob's door) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: It looks like my front door! <br /> <br /> LRH: Behold! The Hall of Arts! (He opens the door, Squidward's mouth opens, they step in) <br /> <br /> Squidward: Incredible! (He cries) The creativity! The artistry! (He walks by a painting) This painting is so realistic, it looks like you could step straight into it. <br /> <br /> LRH: And you can! (He grabs Squidward and throws him in the painting) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Whoa! <br /> <br /> Squidward: This place is amazing! (Steps into other paintings) <br /> <br /> Squidward (Singing): Isn't this great, isn't this neat, I'm a living work of art from my head to my feet! From the very first drawings on walls in caves, art has been what the heart and soul craves! So pick up a brush, a pencil or pen. If you don't like this one, paint it again! From now on please call me Sir Real. (surreal) I can wait for your impression to congeal. Take it from an undersea renniseance man. I'd even look great on the side of your van! Any way you carve it, I am art and art is me. Ask your mama or your dada to tell you about the uh, schism. Between minimalism and cubism. My personality may be of the cynical type. But I've finally found something that lives up to the hype. I can say honestly and with great certainty, that Atlantis is where I want to spend, eternity (holds note, song over) <br /> <br /> Atlantean: Hey can you not sing? I'm trying to model here. <br /> <br /> Atlantean Painter: Now hold on, Nando. Why don't you take five. I'm really diggin' this squid's form. (The other Atlantean sighs and walks away) <br /> <br /> Squidward: Look's like I'll be here inspiring these Atlantean art makers with my beauty. You guys go on ahead. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Okay. Bye, Squidward! (They leave, and Squidward poses)<br /> <br /> LRH: Now this section of town is known for it's advances in the science of fondue cooking. <br /> <br /> SponeBob: Excuse me, sir this tour has been great and all but uh, can we see the bubble now? <br /> <br /> LRH: Do excuse me. Most folks don't stay with the tour this long. Of course you can. First, remember this. This bubble is over one million years old. It was brought here when the first Atlanteans colonized this place. Deftly hand carried over billions of light years from our home planet. It is our people's most beloved and treasured ancient relic. But most importanly, remember to... HAVE FUN!!! (Points to where it is, and they go in) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: There it is, Patrick! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob and Patrick: The World's Oldest Living Bubble! Whoo! (They land on the safe keeping tube) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Look at it, Patrick. So ancient. So floaty. It is the most beautiful wrinkled up, dusty old bubble I've ever seen! <br /> <br /> Patrick: Like a delicate air raisan! (They slide off) <br /> <br /> LRH: Now if you'll excuse me, I have to make ready for tonight's dinner. So I'm just going leave you two friendly strangers alone with our most beloved ancient and fragile Atlantean relic. Join us in the dining hall when you've had an eye-full. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Thank you, Mr. Lord Royal Highness sir. (They stare shove their face in the glass) Just look at it, Patrick. Ah, the stories this bubble could tell. I just wish we could get a closer look (he leans in but the glass moves) Patrick! Get the-- <br /> <br /> Patrick: Oh golly! Oh, I don't know how much longer I can hold this! (They manage get it back up, after a close call when it lands against the glass and bounces off with no damage, and laugh in victory) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Whoo, that was a close one, buddy! <br /> <br /> Patrick: Yeah. We almost popped the most prized possesion of all Atlantiseans! (Laughs) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Boy, that would have been our greatest blunder without a doubt! But we should go before something bad does happen. <br /> <br /> Patrick: Ooh! Let's get a picture for our scrapbooks before leave. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Great idea, Patrick! <br /> <br /> Both: Cheese! (Patrick's flash pops the bubble) <br /> <br /> Spongebob: (With teeth closed) Patrick, did you hear something? <br /> <br /> Patrick: (With teeth closed) I thought I heard a popping sound? <br /> <br /> Spongebob: Mmm-hmm. (They look at each other screaming at the empty space and their skin peels off, and Spongebob's eyes land in his mouth, cut to the gang at dinner) <br /> <br /> LRH: So sorry I'm late. The tour ran a little long. So, how are you all enjoying our beloved city? <br /> <br /> Squidward: I'm never leaving this place. I've learned more about painting in a few hours here than I did in four years of community college. (Shows LRH a painting) <br /> <br /> LRH: Absolutley marvelous! And Eugene, I assume the hall of treasure was everything you hoped for? (Mr. Krabs is brain-washed by the money) And Sandra, how did you find our laboratories? <br /> <br /> Sandy: They are just amazing! I used your invention room to make this! <br /> <br /> LRH: Splendid. What does it do? <br /> <br /> Sandy: I'll show you. (Pushes a button and the food goes directly in her) Now I can eat underwater without removing my helmet! This is just the beginning! I should have a cure for the common cold up and running by tomorrow afternoon with your hi-tech lab! (SpongeBob and Patrick run in nervous) <br /> <br /> LRH: Spongebob, Patrick, tell me. How did you enjoy our rarest and most prized posession? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (Gulps) We have to go back to Bikini Bottom now! <br /> <br /> All: Huh? <br /> <br /> LRH: Ahahaha! Come. Enjoy the best Atlantean cuisine has to offer before you leave. <br /> <br /> (Spongebob and Patrick shake) <br /> <br /> Squidward: What is wrong with you two morons? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: We have to go home now! <br /> <br /> Squidward: Why would you want to leave a paradise like Atlantis? <br /> <br /> Spongebob: Because, uh, Gary misses me? (Cuts to Spongebob's house, Gary is having a party with other snails) <br /> <br /> Patrick: WE DESTROYED YOUR MOST PRIZED POSESSION! (Shuts mouth) <br /> <br /> LRH: (Pauses) Ahahaha! If there's one thing we Atlanteans enjoy, it's a healthy dose of dark humor! <br /> <br /> Spongebob: It's not a joke, we burst the bubble! (Sandy and Squidward gasp) <br /> <br /> LRH: Haha. That's not the real bubble. It's just a prop for the tourists. (Holds up the bubble in a bottle) This is the real deal. <br /> <br /> Spongebob and Patrick: Ooh! (Patrick takes a flash and it pops) <br /> <br /> LRH: (Snarl) Summon the Atlantean Royal Guard! (They come and grunt) Sieze these hostile bubble poppers! <br /> <br /> Sandy: Don't just stand there! Move! (She pushes them, they attack with a trident, pickaxe, and mace.) <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Can't you go any faster, Sandy? <br /> <br /> Sandy: Maybe, if y'all use your feet! <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: Never mind! Just keep doing what you're doing! <br /> <br /> Sandy: [Groans] (the guards shoot balls at them and Sandy grabs Patrick and flings him at them like a Ninja would) Come on, Patrick! (They shoot and Sandy uses Spongebob as a shield) <br /> <br /> Spongebob: (Laughs) That tickles! <br /> <br /> Sandy: Hang in there, little buddy. (Grabs Squidward and puts their shooting balls on his tentacles and shoots them at the guards, then uses Krabs) <br /> <br /> LRH: Don't let them get away! (They all confront Plankton's tank and Plankton aims at them while laughing evily)<br /> <br /> == Patchy's Segment Part 3 ==<br /> <br /> Patchy: This is the end of patchy. No water, no food, and still no Encino. <br /> <br /> Patchy: And here come the vultures the pick me bones! (Potty flies up) <br /> <br /> Patchy: Shiver me timbers! It's potty! I wonder what parrot tastes like... <br /> <br /> Patchy: Come back here! <br /> <br /> Patchy: Uh-oh. Here come the hallucinations. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (Spongebob laughs) Patchy, it's me. SpongeBob SquarePants. (Patchy is excited, and then he cries) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Don't lose hope. Everything will be all right when you get into Encino. <br /> <br /> Patchy: But, Encino is gone. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: It's not gone, if you believe. <br /> <br /> Patchy: Believe, believe. (Falls asleep) <br /> <br /> Patchy: (gasps) Welcome to Encino! It's back! <br /> <br /> Patchy: (Hugs it) SpongeBob was right! All I had to do was believe. (laughs) <br /> <br /> (Song) <br /> <br /> You got to believe. It was out of sight. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. The sky above, and the ground below. Bring me back into Encino. It was lost, some time ago, I'm just glad to be back home. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. You got to believe. I'm back in Eencino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. Baby: Ohh! Ohh! You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to believe. Everything's all right. You got to believe. I'm back in Encino. You got to... <br /> <br /> <br /> Patchy: (Potty brawks, and then, pokes Patchy) Ow! Ow! <br /> <br /> Patchy: It was all a hallucination. Encino's still gone! <br /> <br /> (Patchy cries) <br /> <br /> Patchy: Oooooo, a sandwich. Potty, you're a lifesaver. <br /> <br /> Patchy: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! <br /> <br /> Patchy: Oh, potty, you know I don't like mayo! <br /> <br /> Patchy: Here you want some? Go on. Take it. <br /> <br /> Patchy: You know, I don't like the mayonnaise, you know. <br /> <br /> Patchy: You know, when it gets above 130, 135, it gets kind of grody, you know. <br /> <br /> (Cut to Spongebob segment) <br /> <br /> <br /> <br /> [[SpongeBob's Segment Part 3]] <br /> Plankton: (Laughs evily) Cower to me, fools! I have commandeered the most powerful weapon in the Atlantean arsenal! Now bow before the new king of Atlantis and prepare to taste my wrath! (He stomps on the switch but is too small to make it work) Yeah! Huh? Uh, uh I mean, uh, &quot;PREPARE TO TASTE MY WRATH!!!!!!&quot; (He stomps on it rapidly, harder) Oh, you! (Grabs rock, struggles) Prepare to taste my wrath! (Throws the rock on the switch and it works) <br /> <br /> Computer: LAUNCH SEQUENCE DEPLOYED! (The tank shakes and Plankton laughs evily, everyone gasps and they hold each other, it blows out ice cream, a cow moos, Spongebob and Patrick eat the ice cream) <br /> <br /> Patrick: Plankton's wrath tastes like ice cream. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob and Patrick: Thanks, Plankton. <br /> <br /> Plankton: Ice cream? It shoots ICE CREAM!!!??? (He gets out) Over-sized ice cream maker! (Kicks it) Yah! Ouch! Ow! <br /> <br /> LRH: Look! A talking speck! This talking speck will make a fantastic (looks at Spongebob and Patrick) replacement for our recently deflated national treasure! (Looks at Plankton and baby talk) Won't you, little fella? <br /> <br /> Plankton: I'LL DESTROY ALL OF YOU-- (LRH squeezes him) <br /> <br /> LRH: Amazing! This is so much better than that dusty old bubble! (Plankton is in the cage) <br /> <br /> Plankton: You haven't seen the last of me! When I get out of here I'll hunt you all down like a pack of-- (someone take's a picture) Hey! Can't you read! (Points at sign) No flash photography! (The gang is getting on the van) <br /> <br /> LRH: So nice to meet you all. I hope you have a safe journey back home. And do come back any time. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: So long. And thanks for the tour. (Everyone is in, and LRH closes the door, takes the amulet off the van and gives it to a guard) <br /> <br /> LRH: Dispose of this quickly. We can't survive anymore visitors like these. <br /> <br /> Guard: (Salutes) Sir, yes sir. (He runs to the dump and throws it in there, LRH waves good-bye as they go off) <br /> <br /> LRH: I thought sponges were supposed to make life easier. (Cut to bus) <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): Goodbye, Atlantis. But we really have to go. Back to a little town, that is the greatest place I know-oh-oh-oh-oh! Back to Bikini Bottom! I can hardly wait! <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs (Singing): But what about the treasure? It was really great! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (Singing): I love Bikini Bottom! It's where my Gary is! <br /> <br /> Sandy (Singing): But Atlantis had that science stuff at which I was a whiz! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): Soon I'll see the Krusty Krab. Where I'm happily employed! <br /> <br /> Patrick (Singing): But Atlantis had the oldest bubble which I cruelly destroyed! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): You can't beat Bikini Bottom! No place is so nice! <br /> <br /> Squidward (Singing): But Atlantis was a fabulous, artistic paradise! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): Sorry, Squidward. But it's the end of our Atlantean vacation! <br /> <br /> Squidward (Singing): And back to my depressing life of quiet desperation. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): Good-bye, Atlantis. We're Bikini Bottom bound! <br /> <br /> Squidward (Singing): Please turn this bus around! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): We had our fun! <br /> <br /> Patrick (Singing): We sure did! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): But now we're done. <br /> <br /> Sandy (Singing): And I'm bummed. <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): We're on our way! <br /> <br /> Sandy (Singing): Can't we stay? <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): So now we say good-bye! <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: I think I'm gonna cry! <br /> <br /> Patrick: Me too! <br /> <br /> Spongebob (Singing): Good-bye, Atlantis. We're Bikini Bottom bound. There's no place like home! <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: There's no place like Atlantis! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): I can't wait to get home. <br /> <br /> Mr. Krabs: I don't wanna go back! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): We're Bikini Bottom bound! <br /> <br /> Sandy: Please don't make us leave! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): We're Bikini Bottom bound! <br /> <br /> Squidward: Stop saying that! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): I even love the sound! <br /> <br /> All (Singing): Good-bye Atlantis! <br /> <br /> SpongeBob (Singing): Bikini Bottom is the greatest place to be! I can-- <br /> <br /> All (Singing): Good-bye Atlantis! <br /> <br /> <br /> == Patchy's Segment Part 4 ==<br /> <br /> Patchy: Well, pretty good story, huh, kids? <br /> <br /> Patchy: I found Encino. <br /> <br /> Patchy: But, it's all tiny. Somebody must've... <br /> <br /> Patchy: Ahhhhhhh! Ahhhh! Ahhhhhh! <br /> <br /> Norbluckfive's father: Sorry, sir. But, our son norbluckfive was playing with his shrink-a-tron again. <br /> <br /> Patchy: No, no, no, no! I want encino full size again! <br /> <br /> Patchy: There's no place like home. There's no place like home. <br /> <br /> Norbluckfive's mother: Ok, bring it in, norglonfive. <br /> <br /> Norbluckfive's mother: We'll fix your town, beardy. <br /> <br /> Patchy: Beardy? <br /> <br /> Patchy: Arrr! Arrr! Arrrr! Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh! Ahhhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhhh! <br /> <br /> Patchy: Well, everything's back to the right size, eh, potty? <br /> <br /> Patchy: Potty? <br /> <br /> Potty: Burrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrg! <br /> <br /> Patchy: Um, I'm a little busy right now, but, you, can stop by for your old pal Patchy. <br /> <br /> Patchy: And some more SpongeBob SquarePants. Bye. Potty, let go of me. <br /> <br /> (SpongeBob laughs) <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 5}}<br /> <br /> {{Slogan}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> [[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 5]]<br /> [[Category:Mermaidman &amp; Barnacleboy]]</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Grandma_SquarePants 2010-12-29T23:15:49Z

<p>71.234.165.197: </p> <hr /> <div>{| border=&quot;0&quot; cellpadding=&quot;3&quot; cellspacing=&quot;1&quot; align=&quot;right&quot; style=&quot;margin-left:1em; background:#f3f3ff;width:357px;&quot;<br /> ! colspan=&quot;2&quot; | [[Image:GrandmaSquarepants.jpg|250pxpx]]<br /> |-<br /> ! colspan=&quot;2&quot; | Grandma Harriette SquarePants<br /> |- bgcolor=&quot;#ffffff&quot;<br /> | '''Age:''' || 83<br /> |- bgcolor=&quot;#ffffff&quot;<br /> | '''Gender:''' || Female<br /> |- bgcolor=&quot;#ffffff&quot;<br /> | '''Species:''' || &lt;span class=&quot;plainlinks&quot;&gt;[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sponge Sponge]&lt;/span&gt;<br /> |- bgcolor=&quot;#ffffff&quot;<br /> | '''Color:''' || Orange<br /> |- bgcolor=&quot;#ffffff&quot;<br /> | '''Height:''' || Average<br /> |- bgcolor=&quot;#ffffff&quot;<br /> | '''Family:''' || <br /> *[[SpongeBob SquarePants]]<br /> * Uncle [[Sherm SquarePants]] <br /> * [[Grandpa SquarePants]]<br /> * [[Mother SquarePants]] <br /> * [[Father SquarePants]] <br /> * [[Uncle Cap'n Blue SquarePants]] <br /> * [[Todd SquarePants]] <br /> * [[Cousin BlackJack SquarePants]] <br /> * [[Cousin Stanley S. SquarePants]]<br /> |- bgcolor=&quot;#ffffff&quot;<br /> | '''Voiced By:''' || [[Guest Stars|Marion Ross]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> '''Grandma Harriette SquarePants''' is SpongeBob's grandmother. She is a nice, friendly old lady. She lives in a nice house at Conch Street. She was married to [[Grandpa SquarePants|SpongeBob's Grandfather]] who SpongeBob mentions every now and then. She is the mother of [[Harold SquarePants]] (SpongeBob's father). She first appeared in the episode [[Grandma's Kisses]]. <br /> <br /> She makes SpongeBob cookies when he comes over, and lets him wear a cookie-eating hat. She makes him a sweater with love in every stitch, and reads him a story about a magical sea leprechaun. She gives SpongeBob a big kiss when he leaves her house, and everyone at the [[Krusty Krab]] sees this. They then make fun of it and are very mean to SpongeBob. So the next time SpongeBob and Patrick visit her house, SpongeBob says he wants to be treated like a man, so Grandma decides to treat Patrick like a kid. SpongeBob gets really jealous, so Grandma tells him he does not have to kid to get a grandmother's love. <br /> <br /> She cameos in the episode [[BlackJack]], where SpongeBob thinks [[Cousin BlackJack SquarePants]] killed her, but really she was just making gingerbread men. <br /> <br /> ===Appearance===<br /> Grandma's looks include:<br /> * Fluffy white hair<br /> * Big, Horn-rimmed glasses<br /> * A Green dress!!!<br /> * Wrinkles all over her face.<br /> <br /> <br /> She is a round sponge like SpongeBob's other family members.<br /> <br /> <br /> {{Sponges}}<br /> <br /> {{Slogan}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Character]]</div>

71.234.165.197 http://en.spongepedia.org/index.php?title=Episode_Transcript:_Procrastination 2010-12-29T21:13:03Z

<p>71.234.165.197: /* Dialogue */</p> <hr /> <div>{| border=&quot;1&quot;<br /> |-bgcolor=&quot;#CCCCCC&quot;<br /> !Back Episode Transcript<br /> !Next Episode Transcript<br /> |-<br /> |align=&quot;center&quot; rowspan=&quot;3&quot;|[[Episode Transcript: Krusty Love|Krusty Love]]<br /> |[[Episode Transcript: I'm with Stupid|I'm with Stupid]]<br /> |}<br /> <br /> Episode Article: [[Procrastination (Episode)|Procrastination]]<br /> <br /> ==Characters==<br /> *[[SpongeBob SquarePants|SpongeBob]]<br /> *[[Mrs. Puff]]<br /> *[[Patrick Star|Patrick]]<br /> *[[Gary the Snail|Gary]]<br /> *Class<br /> *Talking items<br /> *Mailman<br /> *Realistic Fish Head<br /> *French Narrator<br /> *[[Squidward Tentacles|Squidward]] (seen in a deleted scene)<br /> *[[Sandy Cheeks|Sandy]] [seen in a deleted scene]<br /> <br /> ==Dialogue==<br /> <br /> Mrs. Puff: Ok, class, quiet, quiet. Now, get out your pencils and paper, and write down the assignment. <br /> <br /> Students: (groan)<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Did you hear that? We get an assignment!<br /> <br /> Mrs. Puff: Everyone must write an essay on What Not to Do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Did you hear that? What not to do at a Stoplight.<br /> <br /> Mrs. Puff: In no less than 800 words.<br /> <br /> Nat: (acting like SpongeBob): Did you hear that? 800 words!<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Yeah, I know!<br /> <br /> Mrs. Puff: Due tomorrow. And remember, class: work hard, and no goofing off.<br /> <br /> (back at SpongeBob's house)<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Ok, Gary, no goofing off. I am about to write the greatest essay of all time. Like most great essays, it will be written on paper. Even more important than the paper is the pencil. A pencil is sharp or as dull as I like. Hmm.. funny thing, as my ideas grow, you shrink. Well, I couldn't have asked for a more beautiful day to write an essay. (looks at window. It's colorful outside) Ok, here we go. What Not to Do at a Stoplight. Hey, this is easy! By SpongeBob SquarePants. Ah, this essay is pure gold. And now, pencil, get ready to do your stuff, because here we go! <br /> <br /> (SpongeBob's clock is shown. Several hours pass)<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (has still only written 8 words) Gee, this is harder than I thought. (looks outside. There is a carnival. Squidward is suntanning. A kid is eating ice cream. Jellyfish are playing tennis. Gary is playing with a ball. Patrick is rubbing Sandy with sunscreen)<br /> <br /> Patrick: Come on, SpongeBob!<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: It should be against the law to have to write an essay on such a super sailorific, sunshiny day. (groans) But I must press onward. Because with this pencil, and the completion of this essay, I'll be one step closer to my driver's license! (a live-action drag race is shown. The car hits a wall, tumbles, and gets back up. Cut back to SpongeBob) Oh, yeah... This'll be no problemo. Why, I've got plenty of time. It's only six o'clock! Okay, okay, here we go. Here we go. (SpongeBob struggles to write) I know! I just need to get a little blood pumpin' in the old noodle. How about some callestetechs? (does callestetechs. While doing it, he recites &quot;Hup hoo&quot; several times) I can feel those juices pumpin' now.(moves his chair closer to the table. He does it a lot because of the fun noise it makes. He then laughs) Huh! What am I doing? I gotta write that paper. (pushes his chair in) Come on, pencil, make words.<br /> <br /> Gary: Meow.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Gary! Hey, hey, hey, Gary! How's my favorite mollusk? How about you and ol' SpongeBob fix you up something to eat?<br /> <br /> Gary: Meow.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: What do you mean you're not hungry? <br /> <br /> Gary: Meow.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: I know I have an essay to write. Now, come on, Gary. (pours some food) I've got to make sure you get your nutrition, so I'm not leaving till you eat every single bite. (he takes up a ladder and fills it to ceiling-level. Gary quickly eats it) Gary, are you sure you don't want some crème brûlée? Or some choco-flavored algae bits? (sees a pile of food on the floor) Gee, Gary sure made a mess. I can't work on my essay, knowing there's a mess in the kitchen. (cleans it up) Hmm. I might as well clean the rest of the floor while I'm at it. I should get these hard-to-reach places too! And these dishes need to be cleaned! Can't have dirty garbage. (cut to SpongeBob, who has already finished) Well, I think it's clean enough now. (the kitchen is now chrome) Why, that didn't take too long. It's only...10:00! Oh. No more fooling around. I gotta get back to work. Okay, Mr. Essay, I say: prepare to be written! I'm doing it! I'm doing it! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! And some of these, and some of these! Almost there and... done. (sighs in relief) Now, let's see how it looks so far. The... Break time! Pacing always helps me think. Let's see, only 799 words to go. Think, SpongeBob, think. (looks at the telephone. Cut to Patrick in bed. His phone rings and he wakes up)<br /> <br /> Patrick: Who's that? (picks up phone) Hello?<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Hey, Patrick, what are you up to?<br /> <br /> Patrick: Sleeping.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: That's really fascinating. Are you having a good sleep? Any dreams you'd like to discuss? I remember on the...<br /> <br /> Patrick: SpongeBob, you and I both know that you're just using me as a distraction so you don't have to write your essay.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (gasps) That is not true! I called to have an engaging conversation with you!<br /> <br /> Patrick: Well, I'm listening.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Uh...Marco!<br /> <br /> Patrick: Polo. (hangs up)<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (listening to a dial tone) Yeah, well, I gotta get going, Patrick. Got an important essay to write? (hangs up) Sheesh, what a chatterbox. Can't he see that I'm busy? I can't write with all these eraser shavings all over my paper! (blows them away) Now they're floating around my thinking space. (throws them away) So long, pesky particles! (chokes on one) I swallowed one! I'm choking! Water! Water! (goes to the kitchen and drinks water, then gasps in relief) That was a close one.<br /> <br /> Gary: Meow.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: What do you mean overly dramatic, Gary? All that choking sure made me hungry.<br /> <br /> Gary: Meow.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: I can't write on an empty stomach, Gary. I gotta have my brain food. (looking through his refrigerator) Now, let's see. White or rye bread...or pumpernickel? Gee, I guess it really depends on the meat inside. And the cheese. (doorbell rings) A visitor? For me? (opens the door) Hello!<br /> <br /> Mailman: Package for Mr. SquarePants.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Great! Thanks! So, you like delivering mail?<br /> <br /> Mailman: It puts bread on the table.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Rye or pumpernickel? (laughs)<br /> <br /> Mailman: Oh, brother.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: So, do you deliver your own mail? Or do you have your own mailperson? But then, who delivers his mail? Is there a never-ending chain of mailmen delivering mail to other mailmen? Well, I guess a P.O. box could, in theory, break the chain.<br /> <br /> Mailman: Don't you have a paper to write?<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: How did he know I'm supposed to be writing an essay?<br /> <br /> Realistic Fish Head: In other news, local resident SpongeBob SquarePants only has a few hours left to complete his essay. And yet he continues to goof off. (his head leans through the TV screen into SpongeBob's face) When will he learn?<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Hi-yah! (karate chops the TV causing a zap and the glass breaks. The room has a blackout and He lights a candle)<br /> <br /> Chair: Hey! SpongeBob, over here! Come on. Take a seat. Put your feet up and relax. (a bell rings. SpongeBob looks at the clock)<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (gasps) Oh, no! Midnight! (panting. this is where a wall full of paintings &quot;Persistence of Memory&quot; appears...) Must... get... back to desk! (runs to the table, but it has enlarged. He jumps up) Whew, that was a close call. (notices his pants are missing) Ah! My pants! <br /> <br /> Pants: Yoo hoo! Down here!<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: You get up here! I gotta get back to work!<br /> <br /> Pants: Freedom!<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (runs out the door) Stop, pants! You get back here this instant! Pants! (tries to get back in, but it is locked. He looks in the window. The clock's face pops off, revealing a mouth)<br /> <br /> Clock: (ghostly voice) Time's up, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> Fire Wick: Only seven hundred ninety nine words to go! (he burns it)<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: No! (the house burns) What have I done? Help! Help! My house is on fire!(continues running around his burnt house until it comes to life)<br /> <br /> House: SpongeBob, why? Why did you set me on fire, SpongeBob?! Why didn't you just write your essay?! Stop wasting time!<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: (wakes up from his nightmare) Where's my essay! Oh, there you are! I must've dosed off. Let's see, where are we? (the paper only reads &quot;The&quot;) Do I dare look at the clock? (looks at the clock, then gasps) It's almost 9:00! Class starts in five minutes! How am I going to write this whole paper in five minutes? How am I supposed to know what not to do at a stoplight? Feeding your snail is something not to do at a stoplight! And making a sandwich. And lighting candles! And driking water! And calling your friends! And karate chopping the TV! And shooting the breeze with the mailman. And falling asleep... (cut to SpongeBob, running to the boating school) Mrs. Puff! Mrs. Puff! I'm finished! All 800 words! I'm finished! Here it is! Mrs. Puff? (goes inside, but nobody is there) Where is everybody?<br /> <br /> Mrs. Puff: Oh, there you are, SpongeBob.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: Here you go, Mrs. Puff! All 800 words! All about stoplights and what not to do at 'em.<br /> <br /> Mrs. Puff: I'm sorry, SpongeBob. I tried to call you! I have to go to a teacher's convention.<br /> <br /> SpongeBob: But what about my essay?<br /> <br /> Mrs. Puff: Nah, I decided to cancel the assignment. We're just going to take a field trip to a stoplight instead. See you next week!<br /> <br /> (SpongeBob rips his essay. He then rips himself) <br /> <br /> <br /> {{Transcripts/Season 2}}<br /> <br /> [[Category:Transcript]]<br /> [[Category:Episode Transcripts/Season 2]]<br /> [[de:Episodenmitschrift: Der Aufsatz]]<br /> {{slogan}}</div>

71.234.165.197